Page 5-THE NEWS-May, 1988 Jewish Family Services Thoughts from Adrienne By Adrienne Rosenberg, JFS Director Chaplaincy Program Added We sometimes listen to our children make plans for their lives—“When I grow up, I’m going to be a ; and I’m going to have ; and I’11 live ” We smile, knowing this probably won’t occur. It sometimes trig gers off what we once wished for and thought might happen in our lives. In getting in touch with what we wished for our lives and what really is, often there are pangs of regret, anger or sadness. These pangs are nor mal for most people; however, for some there is such extreme feelings that they become “stuck” emotionally and resist accepting what is or making the realities of their situations “work” for them. Good emo tional health is just that— dealing realisticaUy with what is and being willing to cope and accept. No one is immune to loss or defeat. All of us have sad things happen, dreams and hopes shattered, or changed circumstances. Our health or financial security can give out at any time. People leave us; we become disillusioned and on and on. Single Women’s Group to Organize Several requests have come to the agency about the possi bility of a single women’s group to focus on dating pat terns. These have arisen from pointers raised in such recent books as Women Who Love Too Much, Love and Addic tion, and Smart Women, Foolish Choices. If you have an interest in being part of such a group, which would be confidential and not held at Shalom Park, please contact Adrienne Rosenberg at 364-6594. Help Needed for Project Graduation Project Graduation is an al cohol and drug free Gradua tion party to be held at Caro- winds for graduating high school seniors. It will be held on June 3 from 4 p.m. until 6:30 a.m. June 4. Volunteers are needed from the Jewish community for these times. To sign-up, call Jean Moore at 366*1670 or Steve Newman at 336-2023. Often the event that brings people into counseling is the fear that life is out of control, or we want to change the event or someone we do not have control of. Yet, in reality, the only thing that can be changed is how one handles the circumstance or persons. By learning to accept one’s self and verbalizing the fears— yet living through them—can one again have a feeling of be ing anchored. This is not an easy process, but it can be done by most people. Other wise, we risk saying, I was only happy when I was younger, married, when my kids were little, when I was employed or some other high in our life. We can not change the past—successes or mis takes, nor do we have control over the future. But we can take today and learn how to make it work for us—in spite of a circumstance or person that creates difficulty. It is a slow and gradual pro cess. Sometime there is lots of anger, regret and sadness. But the exciting thing is one does not have to remain with these feelings for always; one can have the power not to change people nor circumstances, but to change one’s perspective and attitude by learning to ac cept what is and making it work for us as much as is possible to do so. Sound idealistic? Call me, and we’U discuss it. Jewish Family Services is proud to announce that it has added another component to its Friendly Visitor Program. Beginning in mid-April, Rabbi Israel J. Gerber began as the Chaplain to do outreach to the hospitalized, those in nursing homes, the homebound and shut-ins and those Jews insti tutionalized in psychiatric or correctional facilities in our area. This is an extension of and is being done in coordina tion with the rabbis of our local congregations. The purpose of this out reach, a free service of Jewish Family Services and the Fe deration, is to ensure that every Jew is made to feel part of our community. It is isolat ing to be segregated and shut- in. Rabbi Gerber has degrees as a reform rabbi and as a li censed psychologist. He is a member of the movement of Reform Rabbis and of the . North Carolina Psychological Association. He was the rabbi of Temple Beth El for 14 years and has been a professor of psychology at J.C. Smith University. If you know of someone who could use a visit from Rabbi Gerber, please call Jewish Family Services at 364-6594 so an outreach can be made. Happy Shaviioth call 366-5007 Phil’s Deli Cotswold Mall 366-5405 Mon.-Fri. 8 a.m.-5:30 p.m. Sat. 8 a.m.*5:00 p.m. • Eat In • Take Out • Party Trays • Catering Kosher Salami Corned Beef Bologna Pastrami Hot Dogs Turkey Knockwurst Tongue BaTampte Pickles & Tomatoes Farmer Cheese Tabatchnik Soups Empire Frozen Products New York Potato Knishes Made Fresh Daily: Chopped Uver, Chicken Salad (white meat). Tuna Salad (white meat) We Carry a full line of fish including: Lox Nova Whitefish Sable Baked Salmon Herring in Wine Herring in Cream Chopped Herring All Fish Flown In Fresh From New York New York Rye Bread (Baked Fresh Daily) New York Bagels (Baked Fresh Daily)

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