Page 10-THE NEWS-December, 1988
•#> Jewish Family Services
Vour- OoHarsWork •—ler*
Friends Campaign Results
“...it’s easy to rejoice in the tents of prosperity." The follow
ing Friends of JEWISH FAMILY SERVICES recently con
tributed to our campaign to assist others in need. We are
pleased to acknowledge and thank those persons who have been
so generous.
Mr. & Mrs. George E. Ackerman
David Arazie
Ike Ashendorf
Mr. & Mrs. Solomon Baicovitz
Marvin & Lorri Barman
Milton & Florence Bedrick
Use & Fred Bergen
Evelyn Berger
Leonard Berger
Virginia & Lance Berger
Bobbi Bernstein
Harry & Seena Binder
Mrs. Linda Binnick
Susan Blumberg
Blumenthal Foundation
Alan & Lee Blumenthal
Dr. Samuel Blumenthal
Joel & Betty Cohen
Dr. & Mrs. Stuart Cohen
Edith & Sidney Cojac
Lorrie Colish
Eric L. Deitchman
Lenore Jones Deutsch
Jerry & Linda Dubow
Carl & Penny Eisenberg
Mark E. Epstein, DVM
Simon Estroff
Lionel & Miriam Feibus
Mrs. Ethel Firestone
Mr. & Mrs. David Fox
Burt & Myra Friedman
Aeiron & Rhoda Gleiberman
Alan & Ruth Goldberg
Dr. & Mrs. Trevor Goldberg
Joseph K. Goldman
Julius & Mae Goldman
Julius & Margi Goldstein
Meg Goldstein
Barry & Patricia Golembe
Stewart & Jane Goodman
Renee Molko Gorelick
Pamela M. Grwit
Robert D. Greenberg
Vicki Hopkins
Steve C. Horowitz
Jerry Howard
Jeffrey & Barbara Huberman
Dr. Scott Jaben
Madeline & Phil Joffe
Edward & Arlene Karp
Alan & Barbara Katz
Ellie Katz
Eugene & Alice Kavadlo
Carol & Leonard Klein
Joseph & Marilee Kodsi
William & Anne Koralek
Alan Kronovet
Mr. & Mrs. Jack Lash
Harry Lerner
Morton & Bernice I^erner
Norman Levin
Alvine E. Levine
l.«on Levine
Sam & Linda Levy
Fred & Marilyn Lippman
Antonio & Zaydee Lopez-Ibanez
Matthew Luftglass
Abe Luski
Bennett Lyons
Jerome & Audrey Madans
Iris Madison
Walter & Lenore Marx
Ben Massachi
Charles P. Meltsner
Henrietta B. Meltsner
Michael Minkin
Beverly Montezinos
Phil Naumoff
Franklin S. Novak
Arthur & Lois Perschetz
John & Bails Pransky
Joan M. Pressman
Dr. Paul & Claire Putterman
Philip R. Reznek
Shai & Ruth Richardson
Adrienne Rosenberg
Hugo & Helga Rosenberger
Julia & Robert Roskind
A1 Rousso
Mr. & Mrs. Allen Saxe
Gerald E. Schapiro
Robert & Sally Schrader
Mr. & Mrs. H. Michael Schreibman
Larry Schroeder
Ira ^hulman
Rabbi Robert Seigel
Dr. & Mrs. Marvin Shapiro
Sol Shapiro
George & Verna Shelden
Anne B. Sherman
Alan Shuart
Marc Silverman
Michael & Shari Simon
Elizabeth Small
Betty Smolen
Roberta & Jack Sosnik
Hy Spectorman
Robert M. Stein
Terry & Jacquelyn Stutts
Selma Sussman
Minnie Sutker
Harry Swimmer
Raymond & Maxine Twery
Mickey & Avery Waldman
Jonathan P. Wdlas
Penni Wallas
Sophie Watnik
Goldie & Ben Weinreb
Sandra Weinstein
Rita Weisler
Robert Widis
Rabbi Marc Wilson
Stephen Wise
Michael & Kaye Yaffe
Pauline K. Zacks
Herman & Barbara Ziegler
Dr. Samuel & Emily Zimmern
— Compiled by JFS
Jewish Family Services Task Force on Substance Abuse
announces the continuation of the closed AA Meetings
each Sunday, at 5 p.m. in the Temple Beth El V’Shalom
Library. These closed group meetings will continue in
definitely. For anyone who has an alcohol or drug problem
or would like more information about this closed group,
please contact Adrienne Rosenberg at 364-6594 or call
535-8823 (day) or 366-0572 (evening).
Announcement
We salute all the members of the JFS Task Force on the
Physically Disabled! Because of all their efforts in ad
vocating recognition for the needs of the physically dis
abled and especially for their hard work culminating in
Barrier Awareness Day at Shalom Park last February,
they have won the Shroder Award. This nationally coveted
award was presented at the General Assembly of the Coun
cil of Jewish Federations in New Orleans on Nov. 19. The
Shroder Award is given to the small city whose Federa
tion implements the best idea utilizing other community
resources. Jewish Family Services is a branch of the
Charlotte Jewish Federation.
How to Discipline Effectively
By Iris Madison, MSW
In my work with families at
Jewish Family Services, one of
the questions that frequently
arises is that of “how to
discipline effectively.” When
many parents hear the word
discipline, they associate it
with words like “threaten,
hurt, humiliate, or punish.”
When 1 hear people say things
like “My child needs more dis
cipline with my hand or the
paddle,” I see that they do not
understand the concept of
“discipline.”
The word “discipline”
means “to teach” which is
what parents are doing all the
time (although they may not
be aware of it). The main idea
behind teaching child accept
able behaviors is very simple.
When you, the parent, see a
child behave in a way that is
good, you reward the child for
this. You give him/her a smile,
hug, verbal praise, pat on the
shoulder (not candy!) — some
thing to indicate that you
think your child is great!
Because this process is so
simple, many parents “forget”
to do it. I can remember a
situation when two parents
came to my office with a four-
year-old boy and his 11-year-
old sister. The parents com
plained of behavioral problems
that were occurring with their
six-year-old (i.e. hitting her
brother, refusing to comply
with parental requests). Dur
ing the hour-long session, I
did not observe any disrup
tive/unacceptable behaviors.
When I suggested to the
parents that their children
were playing cooperatively
and relatively quietly and
should be commended for it,
the parents looked surprised.
Apparently, they were so ac
customed to focusing on the
“negatives” that they forgot
to see and praise the “posi
tives.”
This reminds me of the so-
called “law of the soggy
potato chip” that I once read
about in an article about rais
ing children. This law states:
although a child naturally
prefers a fresh, crisp potato
chip to a soggy one, he/she will
take the soggy one if that is all
that he/she can get! The rea
son for this is that a soggy
potato chip is better thaui no
potato chip at all. It’s the
same with children and be
havior. A child typically wants
and will respond favorah>ly to
positive attention. But if the
only attention he/she receives
is negative, the child will set
tle for it (because it is t>etter
than no attention at all). An
example: two siblings play
quietly and cooperativel3^ and
are ignored by their par-ents.
When the siblings begin to
fight, the parent(s) is right
there in the middle fighting
with them to stop fighting.
What incredible logic!
There are several forms of
effective discipline (or t:each-
ing). These are: positive re
ward system, modeling, con
tracting, environmental con
trol, rapport building, time
out, and communication sidlls.
If you would like to knovtr more
about these choices, I will be
happy to discuss these and
other family matters wit li you,
confidenti^y of course. You
can reach me at JFS, 364-6594.
Fair Oaks Commons: An Eclectic Place
The beautiful new commons
is the connecting link between
the well-established Blumen
thal Jewish Home (BJH) nurs
ing wings and the new FAIR
OAKS Personal Care Unit.
FAIR OAKS residents are en
joying the many facets of the
Commons, the elegance of the
lounge for visiting with fami
ly and friends, the gracious
dining, the view from the ter
race, and the variety of pro-
pams presented in the meet
ing rooms.
BJH and FAIR OAKS resi
dents often join together for
services in the Synagogue,
discussion groups in the
Friendship Room and concerts
in the Auditorium. Board
members, guests £md visitors
have had the pleasure of en
joying meals and events held
in this multi-purpose facility.
The design of the Commons
provides a perfect setting for
social, educational and cul
tural activities, not only those
sponsored by the Home but
also those sponsored by the
community and outside
groups. The variety of recent
ly held events attests to the
capabilities of both the faciU-
ty and the staff in hosting
community programs.
Two Northwest Area Health
Education Center Confer
ences, well attended by state
wide health professionals,
were held in October with
another planned for Decem
ber. Temple Emanuel, Wins
ton-Salem, arranged for BJH
to cater two social events held
in the Commons Auditorium
and the Greensboro Federa
tion has planned a Board
meeting in December.
The BJH Board of Trustees
Retreat on Saturday, Oct. 29,
and the Annual Meeting held
on Oct. 30 exemplified tbie fine
use of this facility. We en
courage community org-aniza-
tions and individuals to visit
and to consider FAIR OAKS
Commons as a center available
for their programming.
BJH has been a link to the
Jewish communities in the
Carolinas for 25 years. Now,
with the establishment of the
FAIR OAKS Commons, we
c£m strengthen that linlc as we
strive to connect people who
live in many communities as
well as those who call this
place their home.
For information about; using
FAIR OAKS facilities or ad
missions, contact SueClein at
(919) 766-6401.
Noticc
Jewish Fai^y Services urgently needs several volunteer
drivers to drive seniors and those without transportation
on occasional Wednesdays or Thursdays. Please call
Adrienne Rosenberg at JFS, 364-6594 if you can volunteer
several hours every other week or so.
Classifieds Sell
Call 366-5007
Money For Tomorrow —
It’s Our Business
Call on me
Paul S. Kronsburg
EQUITABLE LIFE ASSURANCE
SOCIETY OF NY
Suite 415
2100 Rexford Rd.
Bus; 365-3523
Res; 535-5775
Berrybrook Farm
Natural Food Pantry
COMPLETE LINE OF NATliltAL
FOODS A VITAMINS
Juice Bar - Sandwiches, Salads &
Soup Made Fresh Daily To Go 11-4
Organically Grown Produce
Nutritional Books
Natural Cosmetia
Champion & Acme Juioers
Vitamin & Senior Citizens Oiicounti
Mon.-Fri >-.30'6.-00
Saturday! 9:30-5:00
1257 East Blvd. 334-6528