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The Charlotte Jewish News - November 2009 - Page 22 The Guests Missing from Our Thanksgiving Tables By Karen Brodsky Thanksgiving, just a few weeks away, is a time when we sit around our tables with family and friends. We talk about the different things we are thankful for. It’s hard to imagine anyone who does not know of it. Also at Thanksgiving we lament that certain relatives and friends could not be at our tables for various reasons. Oblivious to this American tradi tion, only a small number of newly resettled refugees get a taste of it is like to be a part of the holiday in the U.S. Thanei Taithio, a HIAS NC caseworker from Burma, remem bers his first Thanksgiving in America. His caseworker brought a large roasted turkey, still warm from the oven, to his home. He had never had roasted turkey, and he recalls the experience and the taste to this day. As much as we bemoan empty seats at our Thanksgiving table, there are refugees who have been waiting years to bring family members to the U.S. They, too, wish to fill seats at their tables. For refugees, the process of bringing family from their home countries is long and complicated. It takes patience and persever ance. If you are a U.S. citizen or a permanent resident, your close family members can immigrate to the U.S. based on their relation ship to you. Depending on whether you are a U.S. citizen or a permanent resident, and the type of your relationship with the fam ily members, applicants fall into different categories, and may have to wait a number of years before they can immigrate. U.S. law is very complex and the complexities may cause long separations, even for refiigees and their families. Getting family members here is fraught with complications. Family of the Montagnards from the Central Highlands, for example, must bribe local officials to provide birth and marriage certificates and passports, all needed to come to the U.S. Then copies of these doc uments must be sent to the American consulate in Ho Chi Minh City (formerly Saigon), where the family members are interviewed by the International Organization for Migration (lOM). After that, one must make application to the Vietnamese government to leave. Weh Ksor, a Montagnard, was encouraged by friends to apply to bring his family here. He was reluctant because he truly did not think they would actually be able to come. It was a hope and a dream. He filed an application so that his wife and two sons (under the age of 21) could to come to the U.S., which was submitted to the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS). After about three years, they were approved to come, and Ksor sent money to his wife and children in his village. It had to be enough to bribe the offi cials, to pay for the 24-hour bus ride to Ho Chi Minh City, and pay for two nights in a hotel before their plane departed. All the steps were very dangerous, including the walk to the bus, especially in light of the tensions between the Vietnamese and the Montagnards. Miraculously, his wife and chil dren arrived safely in Charlotte. Late in the 19th century. Eastern European Jews had only to have the money to bring their relatives to America. After work ing long hours for many months to earn enough money for passage. the next concern was the quota imposed upon the number of immigrants the U.S. would accept. Currently the numbers have nothing to do with quotas although there are limits to the number of refugees can come to the U.S. It is a much more compli cated process. A case aid for HIAS NC, Rebecca Sangkim, is waiting for her husband to arrive. He left Burma for Malaysia, where it is illegal for non-citizens to work. He lives in a rented apartment in Kuala Lumpur, where he plays in a band and waits to hear about his status. HIAS NC has made appli cation, and sent letters and their marriage certificate. Now that Rebecca has been here with her two brothers for about three years, she is hoping that her husband will join them at their Thanksgiving table, probably this year and most certainly by next year. ^ Pass the Turkey, B’vakasha! By Edmon J. Rodman Los Angeles (JTA) — How Jewish is Thanksgiving? With rel atives flying in from eretz every where, with drama in the kitchen and at the table, and a time to give modim, thanks, and say she- hechiyanu for being able to cele brate together another year, how can we not think of Thanksgiving as an adopted Jewish day of fami ly gathering? Though Judaism is a religion of feasts, with a seudat mitzvah — a feast commemorating the comple tion of a mitzvah — for circumci sion, consolation, completing a fractate of Talmud or preparing for Purim, there is no seudat for thanks. Deuteronomy does tell us, how ever, that upon being brought into the land of olive trees and honey, “When you have eaten your fill, give thanks.” Even considering a tough eco nomic year with retirement funds shrinking, and the cost of food and tuition growing, whichever calen dar you follow, are there really ever enough available days to give thanks? With mainsfream culture where we lie and rise, it’s a struggle being a religious minority in America. Every so often Jews need — without the threat of iden tity loss — an opportunity simply to fit in. We need to bring home the turkey like everyone else, then sit around after dinner sleepy, stuffed and watching football. A national holiday since 1863, Thanksgiving for many Jewish families is a time to meet, greet and eat between Sukkot and Chanukah. It’s especially so for college students, who travel home to show off new boyfriends and girlfriends, hairstyles, beards and learning. Even the dirty laundry becomes part of the ritual. The day can be a test, too. A non-Jewish publisher for whom I once worked asked, “Do Jews celebrate Thanksgiving?” Surprised at first, not sure how to respond, I finally answered with a question: “It’s an America holi day. We qualify, don’t we?” It’s an American holiday with origins in a persecuted religious group who makes an exodus and finds its way if not to a promised land, then to a land of religious freedom. Ring any bells, dinner or otherwise? Some think Thanksgiving feels much like Sukkot. Both are har vest holidays where thanks and praise are given, and mass quanti ties of food are communally shared. Each involved a wilder ness pilgrimage. Each has origins in makeshift living accommoda tions. So while we’re shopping for decorative cardboard Pilgrims, perhaps we should throw in an Israelite or two. Or while watch ing the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, just imagine a giant inflat able efrog floating by. As for the main course, it’s the Jews who have the inside scoop on the lifestyle and husbandry of America’s favorite Thanksgiving enfree. Israel is a major turkey- producing country, with many kib butzim specializing in turkey ranching. Many who have visited Israel, especially students, have had the opportunity to observe turkeys doing more than gobbling. My wife while in Israel tended a turkey co-op for a month — the month that lasts a lifetime. Every Thanksgiving she regales us with stories of corralling, feeding, even injecting turkeys while on every evening of her stay dining on turkey schnitzel. Now how many other American households have an ex-turkey rancher at their table? Besides, kosher turkeys are grown without hormones. And according to Cook’s Illustrated, a gourmet magazine that ran a taste test, kosher birds, probably because of the salt used in kosher- ing, are moist, flavorflil and taste best. So, pass the turkey, b’vakasha] The Jewish community has also found community-minded ways to celebrate the day. Many syna gogues as tzedakah activities con tribute staffing along with materi al and financial confributions to Thanksgiving meal giveaways. Thanksgiving is one of the few days in America where interfaith cooperation reigns, with many synagogues and churches holding combined services. Rabbis, minis ters, priests and pastors try valiantly to craft services that will be meaningful yet not offensive to their combined congregations. As a child at such a service, the first time I went to a church, the service ended with the congrega tion singing a song of thanks that began, “We gather together to ask the Lord’s blessing ...” From a hymn book I sang along, reassured to discover that other people sang about God, too. Jews have their own prayers and psalms of thanks. 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The Charlotte Jewish News (Charlotte, N.C.)
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