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The Charlotte Jewish news. (Charlotte, N.C.) 19??-current, October 01, 2015, Image 1

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An Affiliate of the Jewish Federation of Greater Charlotte Vol. 37, No. 9 Tishrei-Cheshvan 5776 October 2015 JCRC Fall Lecture Featuring Ari Shavit Set for November 4 Ari Shavit Please join us for the Jewish Federation’s Community Rela tions Couneil (JCRC) Annual Fall Leeture on Wednesday, November 4 at 7 PM in the Sam Lemer Cen ter for Cultural Arts at Shalom Park. Our featured guest speaker will be Ari Shavit, one of the most in fluential Israeli journalists writing about the Middle East today and author of “My Promised Land”- an authoritative and deeply per sonal narrative history of the State of Israel. Ari Shavit is a leading Israeli eolumnist and writer. Bom in Rehovot, Israel, Shavit served as a paratrooper in the IDF and SHAVIT studied philosophy at the Hebrew University in Jerusalem. Ari serves on the editorial board of the loeal Israel newspaper, Haaretz, and is also a leading eommentator on Israeli publie television. Mr. Shavit will diseuss “Promise and Peril, Why Israel and the Diaspora Need Eaeh Other” explaining how Israel’s eomplex past ought to shape its still-uneertain future. Ari Shavit through illuminating powerful and eompelling moments of the mod em Zionist state of Israel will ehallenge Diaspora Jewry to be bold in imagining the next ehallenging ehapter for Is rael. No eountry is more emotionally eonneeted to the United States, and no eoun try’s fate matters more to many Amerieans. The leeture is free and open to the publie. For more information please eontaet Tal Stein, Direetor of Community Relations and Is rael Affairs at 704-944-6757 or tal.stein@jewisheharlotte.org. This event was made possible by a generous gift from Harry and Gloria Lerner ^ Jewish Community ReSations Council Do Jews Really Do That? Learn the Facts for Domestic Violence Awareness Month In 2009, nineteen Jewish agen- eies in Charlotte-Meeklenburg banded together to formally ae- knowledge that domestie abuse exists in our Jewish eommunity and to take a visible stand against it. Every Oetober during Domes tie Violenee Awareness Month, they join forees with others to sponsor programs that edueate and raise publie awareness about domestie abuse. “Domestie abuse is as eom- mon among Jews as any other re ligious or seeular eommunity,” notes Jewish Federation Exeeu- tive Direetor Sue Worrel. “As leaders, it is our obligation to break the wall of silenee and help establish a safe haven for our women, men and teens in need wherever they seek it in our eom munity.” Domestie abuse in Jewish households mirrors that in any other home; one partner exerting power and eontrol over another. It ean be as subtle as an unkind word or as blatant as a slap aeross the faee. “Children and teens who hear and witness the abuse are often affeeted as well,” says Stephanie Starr, Exeeutive Diree tor of Jewish Family Serviees. Even for those pre-teens and teens not in abusive homes, dam age is being done to this vulnera ble audienee by eyber abuse and textual harassment whieh is growing to alarming degrees,” ON ‘31101NVH0 80ZI #imhJ3d aivd 3Dvisod s n aisidSdd p9}S9nb9}J 90IAJ9S oBuBqQ 9ZZ8Z ON ‘mopeqo ZU# suns ‘PSOd aouapiAOJd 1009 she noted. There are many myths about domestie abuse (see boxed area), but one undeniable faet is that Jewish women take far longer to leave - seven to fifteen years ver sus three to five years eompared to those of other faiths (aeeording to studies in Toronto and Califor nia). “This isn’t an issue for ‘vie- tims’; it’s an issue for everyone,” says Marsha Stiekler whose vol unteer group, Shalom Bayit, is working to end domestie abuse in our Jewish eommunity. “When we talk about domestie abuse and get it out in the open, it’s easier for those affeeted to get help,” she eontinued. “Oetober is aimed at sparking the resounding mes sage that our Jewish eommunity is aetively working to ereate a safe, respeetful, just environment for all our people,” Stiekler said. She eneouraged everyone to begin in Oetober by: * Wearing a purple pin in Oe tober; purple signifies the fight against domestie abuse. The pins will be available at reeeption desks at most Jewish ageneies throughout Oetober. * Beeoming better informed. See www.shalombayit-ne.org; get informational broehures in eluding “Stories of Crisis” whieh ineludes loeal resouree informa tion; read stories of survivors on life-size silhouettes displayed throughout Shalom Park; attend sermons or workshops on healthy relationships, abuse, and safety given throughout Oetober. List ings are as follows: October 10 - Temple Beth El: “Top Ten Tips for a Healthier Re lationship” Workshop (see artiele page 21), followed by a survivor speaking at morning serviee. October 23 - Temple Kol Tik- vah October 11 - Levine Jewish Community Center: Self De fense Course Taught by Sheriff Irwin Carmiehael October 17 - Charlotte Torah Center October 27 - Congregation Ohr Hatorah Each Saturday in October at Temple Israel: Reeognition, in eluding moment of silenee at morning serviee. ^ Myths and Facts about Domestic Abuse Myth - Jews Don’t Abuse. Fact - Abuse happens in Jewish relationships at about the same rate as it does in families of other religions - about one in four - and oeeurs in all soeio-eeonomie levels regardless of baekground, level of edueation or denomination. Myth - It is only domestic abuse if it is physical. Fact - Most abuse is emotional and psyehologieal whieh ean be more damaging in the long run sinee fewer people seek help. This may inelude humiliation, exeessive eritieism, foreed isolation, threats or destruetion of property, and eeonomie eontrol. Abuse ean also take sexual or religious forms. Myth - Domestic abuse is a one-time occurrence and usually a momentary loss of temper. Fact - Battering is a pattern of behavior meant to establish eontrol and fear in a relationship. It happens over and over and esealates in severity/dangerousness over time. Myth - The batterer is not a loving partner. Fact - The batterer does not always batter and in faet the relation ship is almost always eyelieal - loving and then abusive. The part ner sees the generous and affeetionate partner and believes there ean be ehange if only the vietim does the “right” thing. Myth - Those being abused have done something to cause this. Fact - Abusers ehoose their aetions. Abuse is never the fault of the person being abused. Myth - Drinking and/or drug abuse cause battering. Fact - Although they may inerease the likelihood of violent be havior, they do not eause or exeuse it.

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