P E R S P E C T 1 V E
Guest Commentary
by Frank Benedetti and Gary Trowbridge
We are just as deserving
Last month The Winston-Salem Journal
ran a survey on same-gender marriage, which
was opposed hy 66 percent of the participants
— mostly on a “religious” basis. This negative
. backlash is not unusual. After the US.
Supreme Court overturned laws against inter
racial marriage (Loving v. Virginia) a Gallup
Poll showed 72 percent against the decision.
Recendytwo
senators introduced
a federal constitu
tional amendment
not only limiting the
definition of mar
riage to one man
and one woman, but
also wiping out any
benefits same-sex
couples have that
might be found in
legal marriages.
It is interesting to
note that the sena
tors are Larry Craig,
who was arrested in an airport bathroom sting,
and David Vinter, recently identified as a client
of a prostitution ring — neither one a moral
authority on marriage.
I am trying to understand how my partner
of 44 years and I are hurting the sanctity of mar
riage by legalizing our relationship at City Hall.
Frank Benedetti and Gary Trovrbridge at their
40th anniversary re-commitment ceremony
in Winston-Salem, N.C.
Religions still have their constitutional abil
ity to disaiminate. If marriage is currently
in trouble, why are we being blamed and
how has this become our problem?
It isn’t as if we would exhaust a finite
number of licenses. And, if procreation,
rather than loving companionship, is the
purpose of marriage, will childless couples
then lose their licenses? Lastly, how is mar
riage strengthened by making it available to
fewer people?
It seems to me that if marriage is in trou
ble, the causes are a 50 percent divorce rate,
unlimited serial marriages, spousal abuse
including murder,
absentee fathers,
cheating spouses,
and drive thru Las
Vegas weddings —
not same gender
loving couples.
With regard to
absentee fathers, a
recent Parade mag
azine article indi
cated that a Denver
Broncos tailback
fathered nine chil
dren from 9 women
while BB King
fathered 15 children by 15 women.
I also read the Bible and note in that time
marriages were financial contracts between
families dealing with children who often did
n’t even know each other. Women were regard
ed as “property” — first owned by their
fathers and then their husbands. Multiple
otnc
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wives and concubines were common with
Solomon having 1,000 of them.
Also, in contrast to the handful of disputed
verses concerning homosexuality, there are
many more endorsing slavery. Homosexuality
isn’t in the Ten Commandments or any of the
Gospels. Jesus never mentions it, but he does
talk against divorce. We ignore countless other
prohibitions, so why seize on this particular
issue to sanctify prejudices?
Marriage used to be defined as a union of
two people, but only of the same religion and the
same race. Wives were the subservient property
of the husbands who maintained all property
rights. Marital rape was acceptable and procre
ation was not voluntary. It has evolved through
the years to reflert an equality of individuals.
I feel that we are Go4s children, human
beings and American citizens — and we are just
as deserving and capable of love as anyone else. I
John Amaechi to visit Charlotte
Openly gay former NBA player to
speak at conference
compiled by Q-Notes staff
On Sept. 11, openly gay former NBA player
and author John Amaechi will be a featured
speaker at the Executive Leadership Summit of
the National Organization for Diversity in Sales
and Marketing, an organization founded in
2003 to foster effective, diverse sales and mar
keting strategies within corporate America, as
well as within the small business community.
Amaechi is a New York Times best-selling
author with his autobiography “Man in the
Middle.” In February 2007, Amaechi became
the official spokesperson for the Human
Rights Campaign’s Coming Out Project, a pro
gram designed to help LGBT people come out
and live openly.
The conference will be held Sept. 10-12 at
the Hilton Center City. Wachovia is the pre
senting sponsor. More
information regarding
registration and
accommodation costs
can be
found
www.minoritymarketshare.com. More infor
mation about Amaechi’s work with HRC can
be found at www.hrc.org/amaechi/. I
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JULY 26.2008 *Q-NOTES 5