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transilluminations
by eva hayward
qnotes contributor
Changing sex, a desire to !o\re
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With the passing of Valentine's Day, I have
been thinking about the relationship between
love and desire. When does desire become
love? Can you have love without desire?
Agnolo Bronzio's beautiful painting, "Venus,
Cupid, Folly arid Time," depicts the ambiva
lences between lust and love, with Venus and
Cupid forbiddingly embracing. As you recall,
Cupid, the winged god of desire, is the son of
Venus, goddess of love.
In Greek mythology, Venus emerged
from fecund sea foam and while married to
Vulcan, enjoyed the company of many lovers.
In one of her manifestations, Venus Erycina,
she embodies impure love and is the patron
goddess of prostitutes. As Venus Castina, she
has sympathy and understanding for feminine
souls locked up in male bodies. Her divinity
recognized and celebrated that inexplicable
bodily drive to change, to become more than
oneself. How can anyone ever describe in
words such a deep desire (if desire is even the
right word) as changing sex?
Venus has given us other stories of sci
ence, exploration and invention. Recently, a
Russian scientist claimed to have found life
on Venus. Scorpion-shaped, the Venusians
appear to "emerge, fluctuate and disappear."
Science fiction, surely?
The celestial body has long fueled
the imagination of us earthlings. Isaac
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llprvi
12 qnOt6S March 3-16.2012
"Venus, Cupid,
Folly and Time,"
ca.1545
Agnolo Bronzino
Photo Credit: Wikipedia
Asminov's "Lucky Starr and the Oceans of
Venus" (1954) envisaged Venus populated
by phosphorescent V-frogs and predatory
orange patches. In the DC Comics universe,
Venus is home to millions of mind-control-
ling worms. In fact, the only planet in our
solar system to
rotate clockwise,
this Roman god
dess has a toxic at
mosphere trapping
heat in a runaway
greenhouse ef
fect. Rather than
swampy with life,
Venus is better de
scribed by James
Gunn's "The Naked
Sky" (1955) as
"embalmed at birth,
shrouded in stifling
clouds of carbon
dioxide, hydrochloric and hydrofluoric
acids.... The vital ingredients were miss
ing: free water, free oxygen. What it offered
were unbearable pressures and burning
temperatures."
The history of Valentine's Day is shrouded
in mystery, but for many Americans it seems
only a commercial success with billions of .
dollars spent on heart-shaped boxes of milk
chocolates, awful Hallmark cards with say
ings such as "I Loved you Yesterday, I Love
you Still, I Always have ... I Always Will" and
plasticized roses. But, I have a confession; I
adore Valentine's Day.
To dodge my friends' looks of horror, I
tell them that I actually celebrate the pre-
Christian, Roman festival of Lupercalia. And,
for good measure, I throw in a bit of trivia: "It
is somewhat unclear if the holiday honored
Lupercus — god Pan from Greek Mythology
— but the focal point is the suckling of
Romulus and Remus by a she-wolf." Cross
species care, what better to celebrate? A
feast with wolves, I tell my friends, and a
yearly opportunity to reflect on our fantasies
and libidinal appetites.
Lupercalia is full of bloodletting and sac
rificing —wolfish hedonism fueled by ritual
—to celebrate the festivities, I host a lusty
dinner party. The room is decorated with ana
tomically correct heart cut outs, crystals from
a now lost red chandelier hanging from the
ceiling and all the light bulbs changed to pink.
I serve rose champagne and red hued food:
purple olives, red pepper bruschetta, borscht,
raspberry chocolate torte and figs. My guests
come dress-coded in red or pink, sometimes
sparkly, too. A love poem or a bit of smut from
a recently read novel is shared aloud, but
always the conversation turns to desire.
We tell each other salacious stories.
Sexual cannibalism in black widow spiders:
hungry after lovemaking, the female spider
devours her mate. Or, about a hermaphroditic
sea slug called a "sea hare." Any individual
can act as either a male, a female or simulta
neously as both. At breeding time they come
together to make a chain of mating animals.
The sea hare at the front of the line is female
seeTransiliuminationson 18