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(THE POOR KAN'S CAMHTS CEIER)
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Volxme whatever-it-was-last-tine Ashovillo,North Carolina Furiber-srune—plxis~l«
H3EE IIE G-0 AaAIN!
Reco.'gaizin/' true /^oniixs an'l talont
when they see it,the editor an-^. staff of
the Crier(renon'ber it? that paper the
j oui-nalisn class used to print)have lot
^■^nclc G-om McHone take over for a wholo
issue a^ain. This shows that they're all
unselfish.kinlheartcd.an^ /^reat sports®
(iUid nainly they .-’ct another week to rest
while I do all the work.) This is posi
tively the last tine I'll do it,so if
you're readin.:^ this copy over sonoono's
sho\ilder,or have "borrowod one fron sono-
hody who ‘boxViht it,I have a nessa-Tie for
you...SHELL OTTT.YO^' CHEAPSiaTBl These
thine's will he collector's itons Gone
day,and surely it's worth a few little
ol' pennies to own a collector's iten.
How can wo pay our fantastic dehts with
conplinents fron people who road but do
not “buy? 3e a sport about it,help send
no throu^jh collo^.(In the front door
and out the back,:^iided toixr,three dol-
The recent rainy weather(which a
few of US thou^^ht was the Second Flood)
pvit ne in a negative,deathly nood,\?hich
brou.^ht to nind the followin-'; two pnens:
"KillJ Snash,.'^ind,and destroy!
Slay the evil ^'Jhite Man who has kept
us in 'bonda.':;e so Ion.";!
That was the one thou-^iht in the nad,
hato-filled ninds of the freed
who swarned throu^'^h the streets,insane
ly destroyin.'^ the V/hites in an
an/5cr so fierce none of then
loiew later which one of then had
attacked and strant^led President
II.THE SKELETON PIEP OE I'lALlTT'TEITIOlT-
the skeleton died of nalnutrition
and when they held his funeral
all renarked on how fjood he looked
so deathlike in his coffin, snilinp";
uxo at then fron two hollow eyes
in which crawled
two well-fed •'p:ave worns.
RESTTLTS OE LAST ^'P^K'S C0NT3ST-
In the Screaner' s bi.’^ ton-prtzo
contest last issue,which denanded that
you bo absent fron assenbly to win,no
ono showed up on the assi.'^cd Thursday
durin."! chapel tine. All the sophonores
were takin^^ those silly little tests,
nnd the rest of you either hadn't road
the paper or just didn't care. In the
absence of anyone to ^ive the prizes to,
I did the only honorable thin,..I don
ated then all to nyselfJ
THE SCHOLASTIC SCREAMER STAIT
Produced by J erry McHone
directed by J crry McHone
Costunes by J erry McHone
lie'^htin.^ by J erry McHone
Starrini^ J erry McHone
Choreo,T;raphy enoHcM yrre J
Special Effects n^uess %o?
Litho.'^raphy J .R.McHone and
Advisor The Invisible Con
science of JEM.
(HBY,Y'ALL,I AIN'T THE ONLY" JEM""TP
HEREl Ereshnan Jerry Moses' niddlo
initial is also"R",so that nakes two
of us JRI-t type"'rerns"on canpusJ If
this keeps up,wc'll soon con^’uer the
LACK OE ICNO'-'LE^E
For all you soph's 'n'sots who had
achievenont tests recently,and for those
who fool loft out because they didn't .'?;ot
to take then.here's a short.extrenelr
easy tcsjy. C5jiGstions count ton points
each,rate yourself on a TDcrcenta-'Xc basis.
(1)!!^o you understand Einstein's theory
of reincarnation,hono,n:rnization,and life?
(2)True or false?(Choose ono.)
(3)Match th-^ followin.'!; lettered nanos to
tho nunborod nanes:
E. J ohn
E. J ohn
O’. J ohn
H. J ohn
7.Paxil J ones
was tho nain cause of
(5)^'/hat youn^; starlet was seen with what
producer at which club,at what hour?
(?)Aro you now or have you over boon?
(7)Make 1'' different words fron the let
ters in tho word ZORRO.
(8)The Ilinc-^ belon.'i'S to tho loard of Lords
tho Board of Royalty.and tho "’oard
of Musician's Local 5"'2. Tho Queen
is a nenber of tho "^oard of Ladles,
“>oard of Stupidity,and the "^oard of
Iroads. T-7hat ,then,is their son,Prince
(9)lf Oi nen can build houses in
hours,and 10-| nen can tear down 5^
houses in 1-^ hours,where the hock do
all those -l-non cone fron?
(10)Wero you offended because of tho
"wo(9k''lnnc;ua.':;e when wo used"hock''in-
stead of tho nore onphatic"hcll"in