Decembers, 1996
The Blue Banner
The Blue
Banner
Editorial
School s out for summer?
In case you hadn’t realized, and many on the newspaper staff
hadn’t, the next fall semester will begin in the first couple of
weeks in August. Whatever happened to summer vacation
Sure, classes will end in early May, but does that really justify
such an early start back to the fall semester?
Most colleges and universities start their fall semesters m
middle to late August, if not after Labor Day entirely. So how
does this affect students’ plans to find summer jobs if they have
to leave in late July? Would you want to hire someone who hac
to return back to school in two and a half months, right after
they had just been fully trained for the position?
Speaking of summer, what gives with the new summer sched
ule? How feasible is the intense three-week session unless you
have breaks every fifteen minutes. There is such a thing as brain
overload. Imagine a three-hour humanities lecture. Need we
say more?
So when exactly do we go back to school in the fall? In the
official schedules published earlier in the year, the end of al
summer terms is July 31, but in order to fit the requisite number
days into the schedule (to please the North Carolina university
system), it seems as though the new summer schedule will enc
early so the fall semester can start a week ctr so ahead of plan.
Have we thought about how this revised schedule will affect
people’s summer plans for familyz-'vacations, trips and the
aforementioned summer jobs? Some of us are able to come back
to school onfy because of summer jobs. Pretty soon we’ll be in
college year-round, joining the many elementary, middle and
high schools across the country.
What ever happened to the exciting “school’s out for sum
mer”? Simply put, we need more of a break than two months.
And many professors are bound to feel the same way. They
work hard and need breaks, too.
On top of that, what are they thinking about this new snow
policy? Again, not only students will be affected, but faculty
and staff as well. Asking us to drive on dangerous roads to try
and save a little class time is completely absurd.
Combining these two new, frankly ridiculous, policies only
results in double discontent with the university. Not only do
we have to risk driving in icy conditions, we have to spend hours
at a time in classes in the middle of summer whether we enrolled
in summer school or not.
Editorial Board
Catherine Elniff
Michael Taylor
Renee Slaydoh
Jennifer Thurston
Jeanette Webb
Del DeLorm
Editor-in-Chief
News Editor
Features Editor
Sports Editor
Copy Editor
Photo Editor
Staff
Rafrica Adams, Bob Buchanan, Aimee Campbell, Brad Davis,
John Hodges, Irish Johnson, Jay Malinoski, Kyle S. Phipps,
Mark Plemmons, St. Claire Ready, Alex Self, Jason Wicks,
Monica Williams
Wendy McKinney Advertising Manager
Marissa DeBlasio Business Manager
Thomas Estes Circulation Manager
Regular Coiitributors
Brian Castle, Nate Conroy, James Hertsch, Kristi Howard,
Sarah Lacy, Catharine Sutherland
Mark West, faculty advisor
The Blue Banner is the student newspaper of the University of North
Carolkia at Asheville. We publish each Thursday except during summer
sessions, final exam weeks and holiday breaks. Our offices are located in
Carmichael Hall, Room 208-A.
Our telephone number is (704) 251-6586. Our campus e-mail address is
banner@unca.edu. We reon-hne,too. The address is http://www.unca.edu/
banner/
Nothing in our editorial or opinions sections necessarily reflects the
opinion of the entire Blue Banner editorial board, the faculty advisor, or
the university faculty, administration or staff.
Unsigned editorials reflect the opinion of a majority of the Blue Banner
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opinions of their respective authors.
The Blue Banner welcomes submissions of letters and articles for
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and are considered on the basis of interest, space, taste, and timeliness.
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Hall, One University Heights, Asheville NC 28804
So many tests, so little motivat... ah, forget it
Nate Conroy
Columnist
Is the semester over already?
I never knew 15 weeks could
go by so . . . slowly.
Back in August, your classes
were all new. Now you’re
probably a pro at beating the
system in your classes.
Or maybe you never ever ever
want to see a polynomial again
and you plan to burn your
math book in effigy at the end
of the year because those jerks
in front of the book store won’t
give you s— for it anyway
and, man, that class was too
hard and caused more stress
than you thought you could
take, and you studied like hell
but still got a 59 (at least it’s
an F+) thank God it’s almost
over, yeah, almost over, just
one more week and. . . Oh.
It’s time to pop your knuck
les, toes, and whatever other
joints you need to pop to get
through exam week. Let’s get
down to business.
Um, but first there are a few
things to do.
9:00 - I’ll sleep in. I need to be
rested for a day of disciplined
study.
10:30 - All right. I’m up at the
crack of noon and ready to go.
Today’s an extra hard work
day. Need a long, relaxing
shower.
11:00 - Work time! . . . Oh,
Loni is on Springer. I’ll look
over humanities while I watch.
11:45 - Not getting anything
done because of the madcap
hilarity on Springer. I’ll just
put my notes away and watch.
I can take 15 minutes to re
ward myself for all the hard
work I’m about to do.
12:05 - I’m hungry. I’ll run
over to the caf and grab a snack.
12:45 - All right! Got a belly
full ofZuni Stew, French fries,
and watered-down ketchup,
and a mind on humanities.
Nothing like a good meal to
get you going.
12:47 - Here comes my friend
Bill. I gotta go, but I can’t let
him eat by himself during exam
week.
1:40 - OK! Now my mind is
moving from our stimulating
conversation on who the '
hottest cartoon characters are
(Betty Rubble, Daphne,
Pebbles when she grew up,
Ladyjaye—strongyet sexy...).
I’m ready to STUDY!
1:41- Bill went back for more
ice cream. I thought he was
getting up to leave.
1:47 - Bill’s done with his ice
cream. Now’s he’s complain
ing that he’s cold. What a tool.
1:55- The caf employees have
turned on the worst music I’ve
ever heard and the cleaning
guy is asking us if we’ve stayed
to help him clean up. I guess^
it’s time to go. >
2:03 - Check my mail before I
go back. . . none as usual.
2:05 - Gotta go to the bath
room do the after lunch “pa
perwork.”
2:20 - Man, this bathroom is
nasty. My roommates are sick
to let it get this bad. Where’s
the Greased Lightning™?
4:00 - Cleaned the toilet, sink,
shower, mopped the floor, and
scrubbed between the wall tiles
(used my roommate Chris’s
toothbrush, heh heh heh). Re
ally feel like I’ve accomplished
something.
4:02 - Can’t start work yet. I’m
kind of tired. I’ll just lie down
for a minute.
5:30 - S---, fell asleep. Not
enough time to do work before
dinner. I’ll just go eat. I work
best in the evening anyway.
5:55 - All done with my Shrimp
Foo Yon and it’s time to go . . .
Here comes Bill again with his
ice cream.
5:59 - “No, no. Bill, I don’t
want to talk about the sexy car
toon women again. No, I don’t
like Gadget froin Rescue Rang-
ers.
6:05 - “Look, I gotta study, all
right? Yeah, the Geology test
might be hard. No, I don’t know
what’s going to be on it . . . uh,
yeah, he’ll probably really test us
on that stuff we went over in
class. Yeah. See ya.” Why is he
wasting time with those stupid
questions? Am I the only one
with any kind of work ethic
around here?
6:15 - I’ll just straighten up my
work area and get going.
6:30 - Ooh, the “Timmy
O’Toole” Simpsons episode is
coming on. I love that one. I’ll
watch that and Jeopardy to get
my brain going . . . they’re both
really intellectual shows.
7:30 - Man, what a coincidence.
The final Jeopardy topic was
“Roman Government” and I’ve
been studying humanities all day.
7:35 - Still can’t get over that
Jeopardy coincidence. Gee whiz.
7:40 - Okay, time to study.
Maybe it would help if I typed
my notes up on WordPerfect.
I’ll start up the computer.
7:43 - Hmm . . . Really need
to reorganize the files on my
hard drive.
8:43 - All right, files are all
organized into folders and
backed up onto 27 floppy
disks. Nice, organized study
environment.
8:45 - Lemme check my email
real quick . . .
8:47 - Dammit, everyone’s
tying up the phone lines. Why
won’t these people get a life?
Don’t they have exams? Re
dial time.
9:10 - Finally! . . . Connect
300 baud? What the hell? This
is supposed to be a 28.8 mo
dem! I’ll hang up and try again.
9:12 - DAMN! Busy again!
9:30 - Forget email. It ain’t
gonna work. . . well, maybe if
I try a few more times.
9:55 - Yes! Finally a good con
nection. What? Shutdown in
five minutes? Damn, forgot it
was Thursday.
10:05 - I’m hungry, I need a
snack. I’ll eat a banana-nut
muffin from the exam pack
my parents sent me.
10:10 - I should thank my
parents for sending me this.
I’ll call them.
10:13 - “What do you mean
my ACUS is turned off?
10:30 - I can’t deal with this
stress. I’m going to sleep so I
can get up early to study.
New course would give users a necessary boost
James Hertsch
Columnist
How many times have you
gone into the computer lab in
Rhoades-Robinson, looked
down the rows of machines,
and not had any idea what to
run to write your paper? To
format a disk? To perform,
um, research, over the
Internet?
In the years I’ve been here,
I ve seen too many instances
where a novice computer user
will come into a computer lab
to work on a research paper
(usually about three hours
before it’s due), and have no
idea how to use, for example,
WordPerfect or Microsoft
Windows.
Meanwhile, students who
arrive at this campus (theo
retically) learn how to use the
library via the library research
course, and can more easily
find their way around D.
Hiden Ramsey than they can
around the computer lab.
Make no mistake: I think
the freshman-level library re
search course is a Good
Thing(TM), but I don’t think
it s enough to truly prepare a
freshman for UNCA life.
To this end, I suggest that
two new one-hour courses be
implemented: CU 101 and
CU 102.
Computer Use 101 and 102,
in which freshmen would learn
the basics of computing in the
modern ages, and a few things
about the UNCA system in
particular.
What I have in mind is this:
basic word processing and use
of windowed operating envi
ronments; a basic introduction
to Internet services, such as e-
mail and the World Wide Web;
a basic rundown of where what
petency” test to the initial bat
tery freshmen get; if a freshman
were to score as “competent,” he
could exempt out of CU 101.
Like any proposal, this one is
not without its problems. Chief
among these I would say is the
possibility of overburdejiing the
system with the number of
people trying to take the course.
\f you're computer illiterate, being able to quote
Shakespeare isn't going to help you get a job in
the professional world.
computer labs (PCs, Macs, la
ser printers, etc.); and some
basic computing vocabulary.
In CU 101, you’d have a
weekly class, similar to Library
Research 101, in which you’d
be taken through these basics
via a lesson plan. You take it
for a grade, get your grade, and
voila! You’re prepared for com
puting at UNCA.
CU 102 would bear the same
relationship to CU 101 that
LR 102 bears to LR 101. To
wit, CU 102 would be the “in
dependent study” course, in
which you show up, take your
exam (on the computer, of
course), leave, and boom! You
get either a “p” or an “f!| on
your report card.
Heck, to forestall overcrowd
ing, it might even be a good
idea to add a “computer com
To remedy this. I’d suggest
making the course a half-semes
ter deal; This gives between a
month and a half and two
months to cram in the basics;
there’s no need for the course to
go into horrendous detail; stu
dents simply need to be able to
work with the computers, not be
experts with them.
The next problem comes in
finding instructors. Should this
course series be introduced, I
would hope that the Computer
Center and the computer sci
ence department could work out
some sort of mutually beneficial
arrangement.
But despite these pitfalls, I
think the program has merits. If
we’re sending students out of
here computer illiterate, it’s the
equivalent of a high school turn
ing out students who aren’t able
to read.
In the modern professional
world, the ability to use a com
puter effectively is one of the
“must-haves,” and possession
or lack of such skills can make
the difference between getting
a job and losing a job.
After all, many of us are here
to learn a trade, whether that
trade be political science, com
puter science, communica
tion, or literary analysis. And,
if you’re computer illiterate,
being able to quote
Shakespeare isn’t going to help
you get a job in the profes
sional world; but being com
puter literate will.
Side note of the week: Isn’t it
funny how it’s hard to imag
ine things being any different
- than they are right now?
My freshman ^ear, we had a
tin sculpture at the Highsmith
steps, Ramsey library was per
manently “undergoing reno
vation,” Dante’s was decorated
with portraits ofvarious lumi
naries, and Southridge and the
new cafe were somewhere over
the horizon.
Now, the tin (excuse me, alu
minum) sculpture is gone, all
of the library is open, Dante’s
decor is boring, and
Southridge and the new cafe
are brick-and-mortar realities.
But sometimes I have trouble
remembering how this cam
pus looked when everything
was different.