Newspapers / Fayetteville State University Student … / Feb. 1, 1994, edition 1 / Page 6
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The Broncos’ Voice Februaiy 1994 Read Me My Rights! Natalie Sdiaefer I usually watch television so that I might Germany in the Pre-Fallen Wall Era. One day, she feel like a mindless idiot. Let's face it, decided to take her family on a harmless shop- while Brandon, Dylan, Kelly and the rest of ping trip into East Germany. Need I continue? the California Zip Code Crew are pitifully cute. The mayor, in the episode, also wanted to they, and their capers, are terribly stupid. I fingerprint every citizen in the town. It was think I'm on firm ground when I say that you pointed out by one of the characters that having don't have to be a brain surgeon to watch TV. You all those prints on file would save money and can imagine my shock, then, when I was jolted out hours in investigative work. However, my hero, of my vegetative state at the words, "She wants the Sherriff, pointed out that not every one to ban books, now?" I wiped the drool off of my deserved to be fingerprinted, chin and realized I was watching a drama called " "' "Picket Fences." In this particular episode, the . . J r- • • Sheriff's son was shot by another little boy in Ltl YYVy OplYllOYly TfYlUYluCltOTy JlYl^^TpYlTltiYl^ a school hallway. The mayor becomes a Nazi, de fying the Bill of Rights left and right. The of evevy citizeu likeu common Criminal Sheriff mutinies, is fired, but eventually saves the fictional Rome, Wisconsin from becoming a i r '1 *7 • > >-ri "police state." Although the drama itself was STttUCkS Oj QrHlLty HTltllpTOVetl ITlTlOCeTlt. ihc trite and predictable, the issues it addressed were (gasp) thought -provoking. time I checked, that's YlOt what OUT For example, the mayor banned the ownership of firearms in her township. Could this concept be • t applied to the nation? It certainly seems like a COTlStltUtiOTl Veacl. plausible solution to our nation's staggering murder rate. If there were no guns, they couldn't kill people, right? Actually, I think there is a ^ ^ I ^ . . Perhaps the most heinous crime of all, com- danger here in placing blame on an inanimate object. You can't point a gun at someone and say, *^he fictional mayor, was her attempt "Okay, Gun, kill him, you evil evil thing!" You school library. The country have to pull the trigger People kill people with illiterate enough. Banning books like Catchex guns; guns do not kill. I ask you, what will be RyS/ Of Micg._and Men/ Thg.AdventureS ...of solved by banning guns? Mr. Criminal isn't going Hllgklgbgcry Finn, and ^^.e._.Y.QU_T.h.eye,God? It:,S to say, "Well, golly, I can't shoot Mr. Other ^^-^argaret will not decrease violence and sex. Criminal now, because guns are illegal." There decrease literacy and a child's ability are already enough guns in circulation to last think. The sad part is that the real-life a long, long time, even if manufacturers shut *^°^^terparts of the fictional mayor in the epi- down tomorrow. I personally cherish my right to "Picket Fences" have gone much further own a firearm. If some stranger skulls at 3:00 in banning these few classics. So, why did the the morning uninvited, I doubt he is there to stop with these books? She could have chat. And he won't leave standing up. banned many more! Ban Moby—Dilgk because the In the drama, the mayor also demanded control ^-^^le alone is provocative! Ban AllCS—in Wpn_ of the local cable company. She, and two others, because she uses drugs! (Author's note: wanted to choose what the cable company aired to adventures aren't exactly made for chil- its viewing population. Who could profess to your child is perceptive enough to have this right? You may ban movies like Aliens^ implications in the text, he in which a mere female takes on an entire nest of shouldn't be reading children's litera- man-eating aliens, shooting and cursing all the anyway.) Ban all works by Shakespeare while. But you would also have to ban movies like he was a dirty old man! Ban the Bgpwul£ Kina of Kings, in which an innocent man is muti- it's violent! Ban CharJ-OttelS—Jish be lated, publicly humiliated, and then nailed to a everyone knows that animals can't talk, cross to die. Who among you may judge? I know I besides, the main character dies! Ban Cfima wouldn't want to pay thirty dollars a month to PuniPhniP^nt because Dostoyevsky was warped watch reruns of "Gilligan's Island" and "The twisted! Ban everything by Hemingway be- Andy Griffith Show." cause he was an alcoholic! Ban all the King Another scenario posed in the show was setting ^^^hur tales because Merlin was a magician, and up roadblocks to monitor the comings and goings ’^^Si^ians are evil! Ban encyclopedias because of the townspeople. This scene reminds me of a ^^^^le girls use them to find out about sexual- story a friend once told me. She was living in dictionaries because little boys huddle -continued on p. 13
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