It^s All About Communication
by Dr. Todd Frobish
How often do you find yourself having to repeat
yourself in a given day? Does it frustrate you when
your friends, parents, and even teachers don't seem
to understand you? How angry does it make you when
others take what you just said out of context? If you ask,
most people say that they are great listeners. I usually just
laugh when someone makes that claim. Most people are
terrible listeners.
Here are some basic and random facts about
listening.
Spoken words account for only a third of our
Interpretation: the rest comes from nonverbal behaviors
perceived by visual and auditory listening.
The average person speaks at a rate of 125 words
per minute, and yet the average listener only pays
attention to about 100 words per minute. This means that
one-fifth of everything that Is said to us is lost because we
have simply failed to pay attention. Human beings have
the listening potential of up to 450 words per minute if
trained properly.
On average, even knowing they were being tested,
research participants only remembered 25% of a spoken
message immediately after listening to it.
Good listeners are perceived more attractive than
they really are! So, you can save yourself a few bucks at
the gym by listening up.
Elementary students are reported as having better
listening skills than any other age group, even though
high school students believe themselves to be the best
listeners. They’re invincible, remember?
Business leaders rank listening skills as one of the
top skills they look for in new employees and one of the
top factors in promoting them.
And, finally, physicians interrupt 69% of patients
within 18 seconds of the patient interview. Consequently,
in 77% of the inten/iews, the patient’s real reason for the
appointment is never resolved.
Why are we so lost when it comes to listening? We’ve
been doing it since we were newborns-probably before
(I don’t personally remember!). In fact, it is the very first
learned communication behavior. So why are we so bad
at it? For one, although listening is the most employed
communication behavior, it is the activity that receives
the least attention in school. We focus so much of our
energies in K-12 and in Higher Ed on reading, writing, and
a little bit on public speaking, but nothing on listening. As a
society, too, we are overly-mediated and obnoxiously loud.
When was the last time you were alone with no noise?
I mean NO noise. Turn off your radio, Ipod, cell phone,
TV, Internet music, and get away from all other people? If
you ever have, which I doubt, I’m sure you found it oddly
strange. It probably wasn’t long before you found yourself
looking for some sort of mediated distraction. That’s called
withdraw, people! You’ve been drugging yourself for years,
maytte your entire lifetime, with noise, and you didn’t
even know it. Try driving without your car radio on. I dare
you! These distractions have killed our listening abilities.
We simply can’t pay attention to any one source for long
without looking for new stimulation.
So what do we do? Well, turn off the noise, practice
minimizing and ignoring distractions, and make a
commitment to one person at a time. Listen not just with
your ears, but with your eyes too. It will help you put what
they say into the proper context. And remember that
listening and hearing are NOT the same thing. Hearing will
happen whether you want it to or not. It’s like your heart
beating. You can’t avoid it. But hearing has nothing to do_
with memory. Listening does. It will take your full effort.
Listening is about focusing on the right things and really
working to remember, interpret, and react appropriately.
Can you handle that?
If you improve your listening skills, you will find
yourself more liked, more sought after, more marketable,
more knowledgeable, more open-minded, more
supportive, and more capable as a communicator than
ever before. It really is the secret to success. It’s all about
communication, folks.
Todd S. Frobish, PhD, is an Associate Professor and
Area Coordinator of Communication with the Department
of Perfonriing and Fine Arts. He encourages your
feedback and suggestions for future editorials at tfn3bish@
uncfsu.edu.
Athletes Honored during FSU Athletic Banquet
by Angel Robinson
The 2010 athletic banquet was held Wednesday April
21st.
The theme of the Banquet was “Toughness, Integrity
and Passion'. With two teams, women’s basketball and
football, winning CIAA championships-all the teams look
fonward to taking the championship this upcoming year.
The winners include:
Female comeback of the year-Demarius Pankey
Male Comeback of the Year Jeffery Brooks
Men Basketball
Jarmel Baxter is a sophomore from Charlotte. Baxter is a
shooting-guard on the Men's Basketball team
How do you feel alx>ut this year’s season?
“Didn’t turn out the way they wanted to. It was a new
program and a new system. Most of the team members
were new. For us it was a Rebuilding year. We took the
positives out of it right now. We are getting stronger and
getting better on ttie baskettiall court. We are going to
play smart this upcoming year. We have a couple of guys
coming in this year, most of the same guys from last
year, so the same chemistry will be here. And we plan on
winning CIAA 2011.
Women's Basketball
Danielle Russell is a senior from Wilmington who plays
point guard for the Lady Broncos.
How do you feel about this year season? 1 felt pretty
good about the team ttiis year, we got a new coach this
year and that was a big transition. I’m about to graduate
and I got a ring. I wish ttie team the best of luck in the
future!
Tennis
Jensine McmiHan is a sophomore originally from New
York now living in Charlotte. McMillan's ranking is six for
the Lady Tennis team.
How do you frol atiout this year season? This was my
first year playing on the team. I was interested in Tennis
and I found it to be very fun. It was a learning experience
learning how to play on a team and get along with my
teammates. The future of the team is looking good. We
have a great coach, Arie Bennett.
Volleyball
Ifeyinwa Nwokolo is a freshman from Greensboro who
plays middle blocker on the Volleyball team.
How do you feel about this year season? It was a good
experience for me ttiis year. Hopefully we can win the
CIAA this upcoming season and win and grow together.
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