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THE GUILFORDIAN
Published Semi-Monthly by the Students of Guilford College
Editor-in-Chief Clara Belle Welch
Managing Editor Ernest White
Business Manager Horace Stiinson
SPECIAL EDITORS
Sports Editor J. B. Gouger
/' Samra Smith
Feature Editors / Leroy Miller
I Warren Bezanson
Alumni Editor Esther Lee Cox
REPORTERS
Frances Alexander Louise Ward Mary Alma Coltraue
Margaret Perkins Ruth Fuquay .Mary Bryant
Harry Brown John Macomber William Ferris
Gladys Bryan Winston Davis Charles McKenzie
Elizabeth Alexander Franltlin Fowler Mary Edith Woody
Erwin Werner John McNairy Lily Bet Hales
SECRETARIAL STAFF
Nell Ellington Billie Osborne
Clara Robertson
Circulation Manager Ted Pollock
Assistant Circulation Manager Earl Ivuykendall
Assistant Business Manager J. William Copeland
Advertising Marvin Sykes
FACULTY ADVISERS
Mr. Philip Furnas Miss Dorothy Gilbert
Address all communication to THE GUILFORDIAN,
Guilford College, N. C.
Subscription price ¥1.50 per year
Entered at the post oflice in Guilford College as second class matter
What of Tomorrow?
It has been said that the student of today is a slow, easy-going,
come-what-may type of person. But he realizes to a great extent the
responsibilities that he will have when he does leave college.
The purpose of a college career leads toward a future civilization.
Whil we are here we push tasks aside for something nicer—our own
pleasures—but how about the road of life?
Leaders are essential, for a strong nation must be upheld. These
leaders must be steady and true, and they are to come from the col
leges. The world is calling for new leaders in our youth, who will lie
tomorrow's men and women.
If we're to answer that call we should make the best of our college
preparation. A college career affords many qualities. We make worth
while friends, meet new people each year, and learn how to adjust
ourselves to new situations. The religious organizations offer the
chance for religious leadership, giving a basis for church life in the
future. Through the student government we come in contact with
rules which must be obeyed as well as enforced.
We cannot all be leaders, but it takes even more to be followers.
To follow commands is a commendable trait. We challenge you—be
tomorrow's men and women.
Student Opinion
Our editorial policy is to print the student opinion concerning cam
pus incidents. If you have opinions that you would like to express
we would be glad to publish them. Of course your own personal likes
and dislikes will not be considered, for you should be able to settle
them otherwise. But if your opinions concern the student body as a
whole, send them in to the Editor and see them in print.
Accident Insurance
The greatest gift that God gives to human beings is a sound body.
Often we are too late in realizing the fact. We abuse this thing we
call our body. We don't heed the warnings it gives upon receiving
rough treatment. Somehow we seem to think that we are divinely
free from accidents. Let us realize that we are not superhuman. Let
us exercise precaution.
We notice that at Hainpden-Sidney College they have accident
insurance, both for the intercollegiate athletics and the regular physical
education. This seems to us to be a good policy. The recent acci
dents that have occurred emphasize the fact that they can be quite
serious. It isn't a thing to be lightly treated when two boys are hurt
in the same day. Perhaps the boys were playing a rough game, but
it's their regular physical education class—and four years of physical
education is required. As a rule, in boys' schools especially, only one
year of this is required for a degree. These two boys were from the
two upper classes. We are not advocating one year of physical edu
cation, but we are suggesting that accident insurance would not be
entirely out of place here.
P. . m
Fall Days
Some people think of fall days as sad days. This is rather strange
and we wonder why they should be considered melancholy days. We
know what nature is doing and that winter is coming, but what of it?
Nature is doing a glorious job of it. There is beauty everywhere.
The campus is a mass of gorgeous colors—red, yellow and brown.
On the other hand, the student is just starting. He had the year
before him, with time for friends and interests. November may be
the end of a late fall, but for a Student it is the beginning of things
that are sure to be pleasant.
THE GUILFORDIAN
! m AF.
PEWEE AT THE HALLOWE'EN
PARTY
REFLECTION ON VELOCITY
i rode with lovings on
the second bus
only one who has done it
can tell you what
riding on the second bus
is like
i cannot
REFLECTION ON EDIBILITY AND
INEDIBILITY
i ate some hot stuff called
barbecue
which required a
'sanborn chaser
but the apple was delicious
(burp)
is delicious eh schlitz
REFLECTION ON THE THEORY OF
MUSIC
ah how i admire
truth and
frankness and
fidelity
to the facts of the case
jessie bowen was indeed there
the chord
lost
REFLECTION ON UNIVERSAL LOVE
j. h. b. gave everyone two cookies
then she said
because i like you so much
heres another
i dislike people
who like everyone
REFLECTION ON MISTAKEN
IDENTITY
ah how i was thrilled by the
efficiency and accuracy
with which trick planted his toe in
the posterior of that bothersome negro
Notice seen on Bulletin Board at
Founder's recently:
"LOST—Martin's Human Body.
Finder please return to Lib Alex
ander."
"Come up to my house for a
barn dance some time. You bring
the barn."
Fred Newman got a knee injured
in the Lenoir-Rhyne game. Ted
Griffin says that he fell off a wa
termelon vine and broke it.
A Correction:—A technical ex
pert declares that it should have
been stork pants.
THE THREE WORMS
Once there were three worms, Mama
Worm, Papa Worm, and Baby Worm.
One hot summer day they decided to
go on an outing. It was a holiday.
They were filled with the holiday
spirit. They went to the country.
The grass was green. The sky was
blue. The daisies were nodding in the
sun. Baby Worm nodded back at
them. lie felt happy|
Everybody felt happy. Everybody
was hungry. So Papa Worm put Mama
Worm and Baby Worm on his back
and galloped to the river.
He gnawed a leaf from a poplar tree
and put it in the water. He spied a
mulberry tree across the river and
steered toward it. They they got off
and went to the tree and climbed it
and all day they ate mulberries. By
evening they were unable to climb
down, so they fell out.
They boarded the poplar loaf and
it sank. They gnawed off a leaf apiece
and sailed back safely.
They walked and walked toward
home and suddenly Baby Worm
jumped up and down and clapped his
hands in glee and said:
"Didn't we all five have a big time!
Wheel"—Ernest Hemmingway, in Me-
Guffey's First Header.
QUESTION: Now why did he say
"all five?"
ANSWER: Because he couldn't count
well.
Physed: Impertinent
Reflections
We see by the papers that a senior of
our institution has broken his collar
bone in physed class. Upon reading
the article we were assailed by two
impertinent reflections which we shall
unload on our long suffering readers.
Impertinent Reflection the First.—
In most rating colleges, we under
stand—colleges such as Wake Forest,
Davidson, and U. N. C., for instance —
seniors are exempt from pliysed. An3 r
one capable of struggling through to
senior standing is also capable of car
ing for his body in the proper manner.
It is suggested, further, that any stu
dent dating at least once a week will
receive enough instruction in the theory
and practice of amatory gymnastics to
render instruction in any other branch
of the science unprofitable and indeed
superfluous.
Impertinent Reflection the Second.—
Exactly what is the point of physed as
she is taught at Guilford College? We
go out in the morning, and part of us
stand at the goalpost and get cold, and
part race madly up and down the field
and get hot. Then we go in and take
cold showers, and we who are cold get
colder, and we who are hot cool off too
quickly—to get to class on time —,
sweat even after we are dressed, and
feel weak as water and empty as a
squeezed sponge the rest of the morn
ing.
What, exactly, is the point? We
could do better in classes without the
exercise. We would welcome it, how
ever, in the afternoon, when we are
mentally tired, and when physical ex
ercise would refresh us. The afternoon
periods appear to be the logical time
for physed classes.
Aside from these few points, we find
little to criticize in physed as she is
taught in Guilford College. We still
believe, however, that on the whole it
would help us more to take the Red
Queen's advice and believe a dozen im
possible things every morning before
breakfast than to follow the present
physed system.
THE COLLEGE AS ERSKINE SEES IT
John Erskine lias an article in a
recent "Liberty," "What Price Educa
tion ?" We put in our thumb and pull
out a couple of lemons:
The college student is marked for
his endurance and for his memory. If
he can listen for four years and at.
the end of each half year repeat what
he has been told, he is a Bachelor of
Arts. . . .
The college officially assumes that
the student is still a child. Some care
is taken during freshman year to
break the news of the facts of life
without shocking him. No way has
been found to do it without boring
him especially when the professor gets
the facts wrong
Since the student's pursuit of cul
ture is passive, with no opportunity to
do anything, create anything, perform
anything, the youth lets loose his bot
tled-up powers in extra-curricular ac
tivities, for which he cherishes an abid
ing gratitude. At a critical moment,
they reserved his sanity. To the mat
terms imposed orally upon him in class
he becomes permanently immune.
The Curriculum
The moral and mental confusion
which results from following contra
dictory ideals is illustrated also in the
college curriculum, in the sequences of
courses, some of them required and
others elective. In the first place, the
program of studies has little to do with
the needs of the incoming pupil. If
our ideal is to form his character, we
ought to know how much forming it
needs, and in what direction; but we
lay out the discipline before we ever
set eyes on him. Tf our purpose is to
train his mind, wc ought to start, of
course, at the point where his mind
leaves off; but thought we have psy
chological and other examinations to
determine his mental frontiers, the
catalogue is in print and the instruc
tors engaged long before this diagno
sis takes place, and we give him just
the same education as thought he were
a total stranger.
November 11, 1933
THE SEARCH
Man may search for Perfection,
And what will he ever find?
Ashes, and gall, and wormwood,
And a bitter, restless mind.
How may he win Perfection?
Only by seeking it not.
Forgetting both sought and the seeker,
He will be found by the sought.
How may man hold Perfection?
Or how remember a dream?
Dreams and perfection are transient;
Neither are what they seem.
A MADMAN'S PRAYER
Our Father who art in Heaven, please
grant me this single boon:
Transform me into a larva, that I may
spin a eocoon,
May spin n cocoon of silken thread, of
silken thread and white,
A silver shell where I may hide, may
hide from all men's sight;
For my ways are those of a madman,
a madman cursed and alone .
One day let my prison open; I will
fly with a soul of my own!
TWO HILLS
From Calvary to Pendle Hill
A man was sanctified,
And in those near two thousand years
His teaching might have died,
Choked with the Church's blund'ring
way,
Doctrine falsely justified,
But that a few discerning souls
Kept Jesus still alive.
The Quaker stood on Pendle Hill
And found him glorified.
APROPOSE
Apropos?; or timely topics, being an
allegorical hodge-podge of this and
that .... chili con came was on the
menu at Syracuse university and no
one would eat it. next day when list
ed as bean stew the supply soon ran
out when fire destroyed a 99-
year-old building at bethany college re
cently, the students formed a ring
around the firemen to prevent them
from saving the structure, singing all the
while, "keep- the home fires burning."
at this point, the firemen turned the
hose 011 the offeding students who in
turn shut off the water supply, permit
ting the ancient building to burn to
the ground farmer jones was
seen recently wanderly around aimless
ly in new north section, when asked
what was the matter, he replied that
he thought he was in the pig pen.
.... the physical education depart
ment at susquehanna is providing bicy
cles for the students to take the place
of the unpopular gymnasium routine.
.... a frosh at asbury college mis
took the president of that institution
for a classmate (evidently asbury is
a home for the aged) and slapping him
on the back so that his teeth rattled,
said, "i'll be seeing you." there's a
possibility that he did among
the new rules in force at the univer
sity of missouri are the following: no
girl can take a taxi without the per
mission of the dean of women; no
girl can take a bath before six in the
morning, we never knew missouri was
a night school. . . . the metropolitan
life insurance company (this is not an
advertisement) recommends dancing
as healthful exercise. . . . five men
walked out of a final exam at Syracuse
university, announcing their refusal
to compete against the cribbing that
was taking place, the results was that
the entire section was given a mark of
"incomplete." .... a course in bluff
ing is offered at the university of Wash
ington. it is in the departments of eng
: lish and history