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THE GUILFORDIAN
Published semi-monthly by the students of Guilford College dur
ing the school year except during examinations and holiday periods.
Member North Carolina Collegiate Press Association
Editor-in-Chief Thomas Aslicraft
Associate Editor Flora Huffman
Managing Editor Bernard Foster
Assistant Managing Editor Ken Morris
Bvsinets Manager Melvin Phillos
Circulation Managers Win. Vanhoy, J. W. Edgerton
BUSINESS STAFF
Broadhus Troxler Claude O'Brien Frank Souder
SPECIAL EDITORS
Feature Editor Tom Taylor
S'ports Editor Snag Hartley
Assistant Sports Editors David Parker, David Register
Robert Hire, Jim McDonald
Society Editor Mary Priscilla Blouch
Feature Editors Robert Register, Tom Taylor
Secretarial Staff Betty Edwards, Mary Labberton, Amelia Teller
REPORTERS
Amelia Teller, Hilda Hollowell, Betty Edwards, Robert Byrd,
Robert Homey, Murray Osbourne, Myron Sleeper, Mary Ellen Gibbs,
Winnabel Gibbs, Barbara Hamlin, Charles Hendrix, James Parker,
George Wilson, Robert L. Wilson, L. M. Gideon, and Cesca Fanning.
Photographer Stanley Lewis
Cartoonist Alton Blair
FACULTY ADVISERS
Robert K. Marshall Dorothy L Gilbert Phillip W. Furnas
Address all communications to THE GUILFORDIAN
Guilford College, N. C.
Subscription price SI.OO per year
1938 Member 1939
Associated GoDe6io4e Press
Entered at the post oliice in Guilford College as second class matter
R. S. V. P.
THE GUILFORDIAN is a student paper—written by students, circu
lated by students, paid for by students, and censored by students. In
attempting to satisfy every element of the student body it is extremely
difficult to avoid offending some people at some times. When mistakes
do occur, they appear only by accident. We welcome constructive criti
cism but our address is Memorial Hall, not Faculty Row.
THOMAS ASHCBAFT,
BERNARD FOSTER.
You'll Want to Give Thanks Next Year
In the last issue of THE QUILFORDIAN we urged the student body to
talk up the idea of an extended Thanksgiving holiday. We also ran
an account of a joint faculty-student Personnel committee meeting.
You are all familiar with the result of the meeting.
Due to conflicting schedules it was found to be impossible to grant
the extra Thanksgiving holidays this year unless they were borrowed
from the Christmas Vacation. The students were given a chance to
declare themselves 011 the issue and as was expected thumbs went unani
mously down.
It was made plain in the discussion of the Personnel group that if
the students want a longer holiday next year, they should make them
selves heard now.
The schedule of the school year, including the Summer Session, is
based 011 the date of the North Carolina Yearly Meeting. Therefore ft
is virtually impossible to rearrange the calendar for the year 1938-39.
If "interested students" think that they will still be interested in
bird hunting and pleasure pursuits next year now is a good time to
petition the powers that be. A timely request would more than likely
cause a rearrangement in the calendar for next year, giving Guilford
a four-day Thanksgiving week-end.
We Thirst
Lives there a Guilford student who has not felt the pangs of
thirst as he pursued the tedious path after the mastery of the arts and
sciences?
It's a Lloyd's chance that there is not one among you who lias not
walked from West campus to Founders' or Archdale in search of that
indispensable mixture of hydrogen and oxygen.
Those of us, and there are quite a few, who frequently spend three
or four consecutive hours 011 West campus, either in class, lab or study
are well aware of the lack of facilities for satisfying the esophagus.
A walk back to the dormitory in search of the tasteless nectar can
easily cause a disastrous break in the train of academic thought. The
temptation to cease study altogether is great when a not so studious
student is once away from the library.
.Within the past three years there has been a new water line run
to the western side of the campus for protection in case of fire.
There are also water pipes in operation in both King and Memorial.
It would be a rather simple matter to attach a water fountain in each
of these buildings or in a convenient location 011 the campus.
Such a small improvement is one of many that are pushed into the
background by the ever-present and insurmountable objectives of the
building program.
Something had might to be done!
THE GUILFORDIAN
SECOND-CLASS
MATTER
BY
THK CARRIER
At-tlie-Dining-Koom-Door Department:
Guilford men ure gentlemen. Yes in
deed. They hold doors and always
stand aside to let the ladies pass.
Never do they elbow one another in
their haste to secure an advantageous
| position at the trough. And when some
One of the Indies inadvertently arrives
at the rear of their ranks as they file
sedately to their meals, Guilford men
mildly remind one another to step
aside. In the cultured tones of a col
lege cheer, they invariably admonish
those ahead to "open up!" Guilford
men are always gentlemen. Yes indeed.
History Department: Remember the
battleground hike? Heard one Yankee-
Rebel combination there arguing about
whether the North gave in to the South
there or was it the other way around.
Trying to establish a precedent. Bet
they were surprised to learn it was a
Revolutionary battle. Too, I mean.
Dranuitirs Department: Seems that
Jessup is becoming more Involved in
the thespic art . . . and artists . .
You may bow, George . . . She came
to prompt and remained to pitch.
How-To Department: "I like her. I
think she's swell." he told me. "Why?"
says I. "I insulted her a couple of
times and she caught on right away,"
he explained. Bet Dale Carnegie lias
not heard of that one.
What happened to the seating ar
rangement, or didn't the "rude indi
vidual" cooperate?
Old-Cynic Department: Maybe it's
sour grapes and maybe not, but I won
der if this Who's Who business isn't
just another racket. Or did you know
that the campus notables were paying
three sixty-five apiece?
Traffic Department: Our own Lucky
Teter will really be lucky if he stays
ahead of the irate gentleman with the
legal writ. Now if somebody would
just swear out a few more for the
other cowboys of the Driveway Prov
ing Grounds . . . because they aren't
giving driving lessons to their cousins.
A little unofficial survey to discover
the Ideal Guilford Man was conducted
recently. P. Chambers, in case you
didn't -know, emerged as the winner.
No competition to speak of. either.
Something-Must-Be-Done Department:
Professor Haworth claims that the
Colorado river is or Man River, and
that's all right with me. But if you
recall, he didn't stop there. No. He
gave his private Ol* Man River n
motto. "Slash and carry," it was.
Now look. I like puns, but when they
come like that, give me the old "Knock.
Knock" game. That, at its worst, is
quite as sportsmanlike as the lowly
rattle-snake. At least, you get some
warning before they strike.
CONTEST NOTICE!!!!
Prizes! Test Your Ingenuity!
The editor of the Guilfordiau is
offering a prize for the wittiest, most
apropos and all-around-best couplet
which is sent in to complete the fol
lowing jingle, which he wrote himself!
All you have to do to win a worth
| while prize is to read the jingle care
fully, then scrutinize Editor Cann
closely as he leaves Founders any eve
ning after supper,—and complete the
verse! Send all couplets in care of
The Carrier, who is to judge the eon
test. This is the jingle:
My friend the editor, T. A. Cann,
Was always strictly an off-campus man
'Til a Jersey girl who bears the name
Of a funeral parlor of local fame
Now write the two lines! Win a prize!
CAMPUS STUFF - By SANDERS
"What are you going to do after graduation;
run a filling station or be a wrestler?"
Open Forum
YOI"LL HAVE YOIK DAY
(Ed.)
Dear Editor:
I have now been at Guilford a num
ber of years, and during these years
I have watched with astonishment
and pride and approbation the almost
miraculous building up and improve
ment of the physical equipment of
the college. During recent years X
have seen a professional distillation
process going oil in which old acquain
tances will soon emerge as a new and
rarilied products to be called I'h.D.'s.
I have seen an increase in the teaching
start'; 1 have seen a competent and
conscientious coach hired, respected
and loved; I have seen a remarkable
(in contrast to former times) school
spirit develop. And I am not the only
one who has noticed this phenomenal
growth for I have heard many com
mending remarks from people of all
ages not only in Greensboro, but from
students of other nearby colleges.
Credit for this splendid develop
ment goes almost entirely to Dr. Mll
ner and his cohorts which include not
only the teaching staff, but the board
of trustees, the business administra
tion and friends of the college. Stu
dents have not contributed one iota
(the new gym is still a dream) to
the betterment of the college along
the way of the above mentioned lines—
nor is it expected or demanded. Tliey
have however, fallen down and failed
miserably in maintaining a construc
tive and up to date social code, l'ara
sitic students have existed nuisliroom
like 011 the rules and regulations
formulated, fought for and installed
by the progressive Guilfordians of a
decade ago. Of the two sexes the
women are the chief offenders—the
laziest, tiie least progressive and by
far the most docile. In the classic
language of Dean Beittel, "there is
a cultural lag" in the rules and regu
lations governing the women students.
What confused freshman would not be
lost by three mimeographed pages of
petty inconsequential do's and don'ts.
The woman's government is buried
under a mass of silly, small minded
restrictions.
Why do these conditions not change?
The campus at large has long rea
lized that many rules are outmoded.
Of course there's always the adminis
tration proper to blame, but the fault
is almost entirely with the whole of
the woman's student body. For some
queer reason, the fair lassies elect
October 29, 1938
year after year to office those shy in
trovertive, virtuous "stand-patters"
who with all the good will in the
world rigorously adhere to all that
has gone before them. These bashful
souls once in power frequently be
come militant in the enforcement of
what they believe to be right.
in the future, let us plead for saner
elections of woman's student govern
ment officials. Why not till every office
with a vibrant down-to-the-earth gal
—one who has had at least several
dates; one who is a well rounded per
sonality in every way; not one whose
only claim to distinction is an all
"B" record, or the fact that she never
speaks or acts unless spoken to. I
assure you that there are many girls
on our campus with the qualifications
of the progressive official. This is not
an attack upon any definite person;
if the shoe fits—
It is early now—but remember in
the next elections. Perhaps I exagger
ate.
Signed,
I'M A HOG ABOUT IT.
SAI), ISN'T IT?
Dear Editor:
I am a day student and I think the
day students are getting a lousy deal
as far as the social life on this cam
pus is concerned. If a young man on
Ibis campus dates a girl a few times,
be is considered the same as engaged
to her. If any other boy dates this
girl, he is considered a heel. And this
applies to day students as well as
campus students.
And yet a day student is not allowed
lo bring an outside date to a campus
dance! Campus students are not the
only ones who enjoy taking a date
to a dance. But can a day student do
Ibis al Guilford College? Heck, no!! If
they take another boy's girl to a dance,
they have committed a scandalous
outrage. And that is the way the cam
pus men feel about it. If they wish to
take a date to a dance, they must
make their choice from the few co
eds that are left. If there is a co-ed
on (his campus who is not already
bitched to some residing male, can you
think of anyone who would want to
date her? Where then is there an eligi
ble date for a day student? Dating a
cute girl on this campus is the same as
dating a married woman, or the sea
hag's daughter. What is the matter?
Are the co-eds afraid that they will
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