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(Continued from page two)
Professor—“No, I mean the first
human being, the first man.”
Eliza—“Oh, George Washington,
first in war, first in ”
Professor—“No, no, I mean Adam,
Eliza—“Oh, I didn’t know you were
talking about foreigners.”
Alice Belle Rulfs
Professor—“Alice, who is the most
popular man in town?”
Alice—“Mr. Sam Welfare.”
Alice—“ Because he is such a good
Elizabeth Griffin (Pud.)
Professor—“Please translate the
first lines of Virgil’s ‘Arma virum-
Elizabeth—“She, she, threw her
arms around his neck—^that’s as far as
I got, professor.”
Professor—“Well, that’s far enough,
Julia Bethea (History)
Prof.—Whom do the ancients say
supported the world on his shoulders ?
Prof.—And who supported Atlas?
Julia—His wife supported him.
Prof.—When the rain falls, does it
ever rise again?
Rosa—Yes, sir, in dew time.
Prof.—What does Ed. Shepherd say
Alice—He says that the groom is
more expensive than the bride.
Alice—He says that the bride is al
ways given ^way but the groom is
Prof.—What’s the difference be
tween the north and south poles?
Estelle—All the difference in the
Prof.—What is the difference be
tween stabbing a man and killing a
Ruth—One is assault with intent to
kill, the other is killing with the in
tent to salt.
Prof.—Why is Josephine Shaffner
like a looking glass?
Alice—One reflects without speak
ing, the other speaks without re
Prof.—What trees bears the most
fruit to market?
Eliza—John Brown says it is the
Prof.—Why are Salem Girls like
Eliz.—Because they can’t go off
without a beau and they’re all in a
quiwer till they get one.
1st Fresh (seeing instructor enter
class room with box of chalk)—Miss
Jackson must be awful busy today.
2nd Fresh—How do you know.
1st Fresh—She is taking her lunch
to class with her to save time.
Salem Girl—I want a pair of kid
Clerk—How long do you want them.
Salem Girl—All the time I want to
buy them, not rent them.
Student (registering for second
term)—I would rather take Pictish
than any other language.
Miss F—Why do you choose that?
Student—There are only five words
of it left.
Miss deB.—Did the war change the
map of Africa?
Julia B.—Not the shape.
Raye D.—I thought bacteria made
Juanita S. (deep in the study of her
Biolcgy notes)—They do, but the
mosquito carries them.
Mrs. Herndon—Marjorie, why do
you call me crystal?
M. B.—Because you are always on
JUNIORS HOSTESSES TO THE
On Thursday evening the Kiw'anis
Club were dinner guests of the college,
members of the Junior class acting a.s
hostesses. After Rev. R. E. Gribben
was invited to say the grace a menu
of grapefruit, roast veal with dress
ing, mached potatoes, creamed aspara
gus, coffee with parker house rolls
and lemon cream pie was served.
Miss Ruth Crowell, president of the
Junior class, spoke a few words ol
welcome, which she said came from
her heart, and President Barber, of
the Kiwanians, gracefully responded.
Mr. L. M. Shepard was elected pianist
by acclamation, and led the singing ol
America and several rousing songs.
Dr. Rondthaler being called upon for
a few remarks responded in his usual
happy vein, and pleased every one by
announcing that Mr. L. M. Shepard
had applied for the job as night-
watchman at Salem and as he furn
ished exceHent recommendations
would probably be accepted, providing
the faculty approved.
After each Junior had been pre
sented carnations by the gallant Kiw
anians, Mr. Douglas Rights directed a
very clever stunt in which prominent
Kiwanians masqueraded as ?nembers
of the Junior class.
Mr. L. J. Heath sent greetings and
said he was “all broken up” at not be
ing able to be present, and in a “quiz”
Misses Queen Graeber, Mary Warren,
Katherine Denny and Alice Ross re
ceived prizes, while the Junior class
as a whole, was presented by Mr. B. J.
Pfohl with a handsome corsage of cab
bage, onions, carrots and green pep
pers. The class response was a song
to the Kiwanians.
After dinner a farce called “Here
Comes the Bride” was presented for
the pleasure of the guests in the col
lege library. At the conclusion of the
play a “good-night” song was sung
and the gentlemen departed after
voting the members of the class of
1923 ideal hostesses.
Why take a iiiiimte’s time trying to decide just what
to do. Just come to the (jirl’s Drug Store, where is
found everything to make you forget the worrie* of
—AND IN FACT ANYTHING YOU WANT.
And don’t forget—in this place of refinement you ^re
always assured of cordial hospitality, carefully com
pounded Drugs and Cosmetics—and Pure Foods.
W elf are’s
432 NORTH LIBERTY STREET.
FOR ANY OCCASION.
A complete line and at prices to attract. We will be de
lighted to have the College Girls and Teachers visit our
store any time and assure them pleasant relations in their
ROSENBACHER & BRO.
THE STORE FOR THE COLLEGE GIRL.
TWEED SUITS —HOMESPUN SUITS —CAPES
DRESSES WITH CAPES
SPORT FOOTWEAR — SPORT HOSIERY — SPORT
“The Store of Fashions”
ROSENBACHER & BRO.