Newspapers / Salem College Student Newspaper / Feb. 17, 1922, edition 1 / Page 4
Part of Salem College Student Newspaper / About this page
This page has errors
The date, title, or page description is wrong
This page has harmful content
This page contains sensitive or offensive material
THE SALEMITE « SALEM JOKES. (Continued from page two) Professor—“No, I mean the first human being, the first man.” Eliza—“Oh, George Washington, first in war, first in ” Professor—“No, no, I mean Adam, of course.” Eliza—“Oh, I didn’t know you were talking about foreigners.” Alice Belle Rulfs Professor—“Alice, who is the most popular man in town?” Alice—“Mr. Sam Welfare.” Professor—“Why ?” Alice—“ Because he is such a good mixer.” Elizabeth Griffin (Pud.) Professor—“Please translate the first lines of Virgil’s ‘Arma virum- cpie.' ” Elizabeth—“She, she, threw her arms around his neck—^that’s as far as I got, professor.” Professor—“Well, that’s far enough, Elizabeth.” Julia Bethea (History) Prof.—Whom do the ancients say supported the world on his shoulders ? Julia—Atlas. Prof.—And who supported Atlas? Julia—His wife supported him. Rosa James. Prof.—When the rain falls, does it ever rise again? Rosa—Yes, sir, in dew time. Alice Lyerly Prof.—What does Ed. Shepherd say about marriage? Alice—He says that the groom is more expensive than the bride. Prof.—How’s that? Alice—He says that the bride is al ways given ^way but the groom is often sold. Estelle McCanless. Prof.—What’s the difference be tween the north and south poles? Estelle—All the difference in the world. Ruth Crowell. Prof.—What is the difference be tween stabbing a man and killing a hog? Ruth—One is assault with intent to kill, the other is killing with the in tent to salt. Alic« Rulfs. Prof.—Why is Josephine Shaffner like a looking glass? Alice—One reflects without speak ing, the other speaks without re flecting. Eliza Moore. Prof.—What trees bears the most fruit to market? Eliza—John Brown says it is the axle tree. Elizabeth Zachary. Prof.—Why are Salem Girls like arrows ? Eliz.—Because they can’t go off without a beau and they’re all in a quiwer till they get one. 1st Fresh (seeing instructor enter class room with box of chalk)—Miss Jackson must be awful busy today. 2nd Fresh—How do you know. 1st Fresh—She is taking her lunch to class with her to save time. Salem Girl—I want a pair of kid gloves. Clerk—How long do you want them. Salem Girl—All the time I want to buy them, not rent them. Student (registering for second term)—I would rather take Pictish than any other language. Miss F—Why do you choose that? Student—There are only five words of it left. Miss deB.—Did the war change the map of Africa? Julia B.—Not the shape. Raye D.—I thought bacteria made vinegar. Juanita S. (deep in the study of her Biolcgy notes)—They do, but the mosquito carries them. Mrs. Herndon—Marjorie, why do you call me crystal? M. B.—Because you are always on the watch. JUNIORS HOSTESSES TO THE KIWANIS. On Thursday evening the Kiw'anis Club were dinner guests of the college, members of the Junior class acting a.s hostesses. After Rev. R. E. Gribben was invited to say the grace a menu of grapefruit, roast veal with dress ing, mached potatoes, creamed aspara gus, coffee with parker house rolls and lemon cream pie was served. Miss Ruth Crowell, president of the Junior class, spoke a few words ol welcome, which she said came from her heart, and President Barber, of the Kiwanians, gracefully responded. Mr. L. M. Shepard was elected pianist by acclamation, and led the singing ol America and several rousing songs. Dr. Rondthaler being called upon for a few remarks responded in his usual happy vein, and pleased every one by announcing that Mr. L. M. Shepard had applied for the job as night- watchman at Salem and as he furn ished exceHent recommendations would probably be accepted, providing the faculty approved. After each Junior had been pre sented carnations by the gallant Kiw anians, Mr. Douglas Rights directed a very clever stunt in which prominent Kiwanians masqueraded as ?nembers of the Junior class. Mr. L. J. Heath sent greetings and said he was “all broken up” at not be ing able to be present, and in a “quiz” Misses Queen Graeber, Mary Warren, Katherine Denny and Alice Ross re ceived prizes, while the Junior class as a whole, was presented by Mr. B. J. Pfohl with a handsome corsage of cab bage, onions, carrots and green pep pers. The class response was a song to the Kiwanians. After dinner a farce called “Here Comes the Bride” was presented for the pleasure of the guests in the col lege library. At the conclusion of the play a “good-night” song was sung and the gentlemen departed after voting the members of the class of 1923 ideal hostesses. Girls! Girls! Why take a iiiiimte’s time trying to decide just what to do. Just come to the (jirl’s Drug Store, where is found everything to make you forget the worrie* of Study— —LIGHT LUNCHES, —CREAMS, —SODAS, —AND IN FACT ANYTHING YOU WANT. And don’t forget—in this place of refinement you ^re always assured of cordial hospitality, carefully com pounded Drugs and Cosmetics—and Pure Foods. W elf are’s I EXCEPTIONAL SERVICE EISENBERG’S 432 NORTH LIBERTY STREET. —DRESSES —PRETTY SWEATERS, —OOAT,S —COAT SUITS FOR ANY OCCASION. A complete line and at prices to attract. We will be de lighted to have the College Girls and Teachers visit our store any time and assure them pleasant relations in their purchases. FOUNDED 1880 ROSENBACHER & BRO. THE STORE FOR THE COLLEGE GIRL. Headquarters For SPORTS APPAREL TWEED SUITS —HOMESPUN SUITS —CAPES DRESSES WITH CAPES SPORT FOOTWEAR — SPORT HOSIERY — SPORT MILLINERY. “The Store of Fashions” ROSENBACHER & BRO. /
Salem College Student Newspaper
Standardized title groups preceding, succeeding, and alternate titles together.
Feb. 17, 1922, edition 1
4
Click "Submit" to request a review of this page. NCDHC staff will check .
0 / 75