Newspapers / Salem College Student Newspaper / Dec. 8, 1950, edition 1 / Page 8
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The Big Chef (Continued from page 5) intruders who are not exceedingly cautious. A squardon of B-29’s hovering overhead could scarcely make any more racket than Daddy makes when he cookS. You would be sur prised at the strange noises a dead chicken makes when she is being cut into sections for frying. Never theless, those sounds must come from the chicken, because Daddy swears he never coughs, chokes, or gags during this operation. Daddy never quite manages to get everything cooked at the same time, but he always has everything piping hot before he allows it to go to the table. ^ This is a very carefully planned maneuver and a most successful One. So successful, in fact, that is not advisable to touch anything for several minutes unless you have very tough skin. The most amazing thing aboutj these experiments in the kitchen | is that they usually turn out so well! There have been times when we were rather wary of certain dishes, but our skepticism was gen erally proved wrong. Yet, no mat ter how we rave about the excellent results he obtains on his cooking sprees. Daddy is never completely satisfied. Me is sure there is a pinch too much of this or a drop too little of that, and nothing can dissuade him. In two or three weeks he will have another new idea, don his dishtowel, and retire to the kitchen in solitude again. Sis Tells Of Home Life By Wylma Pooser Mom, you tell her. Tell her she can’t—she won’t listen to me ’cause she’s mad. Ann’s too young to wear lipstick, isn’t she? She’s just a child—I never wore it when I was just in the eighth grade and I don’t think that it’s fair to let her. But look at it, Mom. It looks terrbile. Make her go w'ash her face. She’s got it plastered from one ear to the other; she doesn’t even know how' to put it on. I know we all have to learn by ex perience, but I don’t see why Ann should embarrass the entire family while she’s learning. 1 absolutely refuse to walk to school with her; I’ll go by the back way. Where did she ever find that hideous color ? Mine? Why, it couldn't be. Well, maybe it’s one that I bought last year when 1 first started wearing it, but 1 know it never looked like that on me. My skin must be a little darker than Ann’s. Besides, if it’s mine, who told her that she could have it ? In the trash basket? It’s that Katy! She just won’t leave any of my things alone. When she cleans up the room she just throw's everything away. Did you know that she threw away a whole stack of my best Alan Ladd pictures last week ? And now my good lip stick—wait’ll I get my hands on that. Well, I’m sorry. Mom, but really, don’t you think it’s the limit? Ann stole my lipstick and Katy’s throwing away all my things. I’m just not going to put up with it any longer. I’m going to start locking my room so that certain people can’t get in there. Make her give it back, Mom. Honestly, you always let her have everything. I just know you love her the best. Only last week she got some new sandals and you won’t even let me buy a new dress for the Junior-Senior. And now you’re giving her my things, too. What ? No. Daddy didn’t ex actly say that I couldn’t have the dress. He said it was up to you, though, and you’d probably rather get one for Ann. Oh, Mom, it’s out of this world! —pink, with a huge net skirt and when you walk the petticoat rustles and— After school? Oh, will you? You’ll love it, I know, and I don’t want to disgrace the , family by wearing that old blue one with the puffed sleeves. Honestly, Mom, you’ve no idea how something like puffed sleeves can just ruin a girl’s w'hole evening—the pink one’s not exactly strapless, but it kind of looks like it from a distance. If you only will. I’ll pay you back out of my allowance every week and I’ll make my bed in the mornings and—well, Ann can keep that old lipstick, I guess, if she wants it The Men (Continued from page three) beverages c. Brings date home so early that mother appears at door with frenzied query: “Is she sick?” d. Bids a formal goodnite at the door e. Calls approximately every 4 weeks for an “encore” VI. The Sponger or Drifter Type A. The “Holidate” Variety 1) Usually features a broad grin 2) Appears most frequently during holiday festivities, particular^.. the yuletide season (when food and drink is most likely to be running rampant.) 3) Always appears without warning, usually at an odd hour 4) Fairly fraught with witty sallies; generally hogs con versation ' 5) Clings to chair as if taped there 6) Seldom shows more defer ence to parents or other elderly persons in house hold than “Hi ya.” (Fails December 8, 1950 to rise to feet, etc.) 7) Fades away until follow ing Xmas VII. The Genius-in-a - World - of. Pygmies Type 1) Quotes liberally from Eliot Wolfe, Shaw and other lit erary figures. 2) Is apt to state without pro- vocation the publication date of “Tintern Abbey." 3) When in his cups, will amaze all by donning fools’ cap and bells and becoming a veritable buffoon, (an other paradox.) VIII. The Good Soul 1) Makes date far in advance 2) Arrives for said date on dot of pre-arranged hour 3) Spends money generously 4) Usually “on the wagon” 5) States seriously at close of evening: I shall call you again soon” (and does) 6) Unattractive And so, my young and foolish dreamers, don’t put all your eggs in one basket; rather observe and learn from every source; and when “Mr. Right” comes along—ya will be prepared! In spite of disillusion- ments, continue “To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield”! Victor, Columbia and Decca Records Fourth at Spruce St. WmM TOBACCO GROWERS’ MILDNESS TEST TODRSELF... “mAcm mi sum mmt smu miitir LV YES... Compare Chesterfield with the brand you’ve been smoking ... Open a pack ... smell that milder Chesterfield aroma. tobaccos that smell milder smoke milder. Now smoke Chesterfields—they ^ smoke milder, and they leave NO UNPLEASANT AFTER-TARTR LEADINO SELLER IN AMERICA’S COLLE0ES 0 m. WT«eilAPH$ TARg«----" #8 CitirfioHr tw, t iof s, W-w Ti-M"* C>
Salem College Student Newspaper
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Dec. 8, 1950, edition 1
8
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