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Volume V, Number VI Montredt, NC 28757 February 28, 2003
Stewart Chews Way to Crown
By Kortney Blythe
In a male beauty contest parody,
Andrew Baird, Drew Stewart, Jazz
Cathcart, and George White flaunted
their cleverness and charm to impress
a panel of faculty and staff judges
and entertain the students.
To kick off the February 12, King
of Hearts competition, the judges
strutted into Gaither Chapel as Blues
Brother Sandra Owen, Bob “Elvis”
Graham, child prodigy Carol McMa
han, and golfer Ed Garrett.
The contestants, on the other hand,
paraded in as Andrew the pimp.
Super Jazz a.k.a. “Black Man,” Drew
the motoreycle-driving Alabama
redneck, and George masked as the
boxing homestarrunner.com charac
ter, Strong Bad.
Last year’s king, Matt Cheezem
hosted as the main character Leon
Phelps from the movie The Ladies
Man. Cheezem incited laughs by
continuously and Hghtheartediy rag
ging on last year’s runner-up Jeff
Walker.
In the first competition, the swim
suit, the competitors displayed their
best beach attire. Jenn Burdette cited
“George’s glow-in-the-dark abs,” as
her favorite part.
Next, the competitors strutted their
stuff in the talent category. Cathcart
played a video he had created,
Stewart grossed out the audience
with his “Cooking with Cope” (Cope
is short for Copenhagen© chewing
tobacco). He concocted three differ
ent reeipes blending Copenhagen®
with peanut butter, com flakes, and
milk. When his last concoction, a
Cope milkshake, slopped all over the
stage, Stewart remained in character
and licked it off the carpet.
Many students cited White’s
talent as their favorite. The
homestarrunner.com Web site
increasingly fills students computer
screens on campus. White continued
with the HomestarRunner theme and
conducted a mock session of Strong
Brevardian Crumbles
Montreat Gate
By Kortney Blythe
36-year-old David Kirby careened
into the landmark Montreat gate at
9:15 p.m. on Valentine’s Day while
attempting to navigate the slippery
roads.
Kirby is director of bands at
Brevard College and was returning
home from a conference when he
collided into the arches.
According to the police report
filed by Officer Phyllis Comrie,
Kirby was headed south on Assembly
drive when, “he missed judged the
entrance to the gate applied his brake
and his car slid into the middle abut
ment.”
The crash crumpled Kirby’s
1994 Saturn leaving it undriveable
and causing an estimated $6,500 of
damage to the car, mainly to the left
front side.
Officer Comrie reported Kirby’s
statement: “he did not realize how
close he was until he was right on the
entrance.” Rain and dusk may have
added to his visibility and perception
hindrance.
The police report stated that the
vehicle smashed into the gate at 30
Continued on page 4
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Tile Montreal gate abutment sutTcred .serious damage in February 14 late-night accident.
Bad e-mails.
The first E-mail requested a dem
onstration on “How to be Emo.”
White’s assistants, Phil Duvall and
John Laughter, dragged freshman
Nathan Thomas on stage bound in
a sleeping bag. Duvall and Laughter
released Thomas from the sleeping
bag after splintering a stick over his
back.
White’s definition of an “Emo”
person was exemplified in Thomas:
“a dorky white guy with tight pants, a
band T-shirt, a sweater, a retro leather
jacket, and an array of Chuck Taylor
shoes to choose from.”
One of the judges. Bob Graham,
asserts, “It’s hard to translate an
animated character into real life.
I had heard of the Web site, but 1
wasn’t really familiar with [Strong
Bad].” Students attribute White’s
Contestants Jazz Cathcart, Drew Stewart, George White & Andrew Baird vied for votes.
last place ranking to this confusion.
Graham jokingly added, “Personally,
1 thought he had a big head.”
The judges partook in the rebel
lious atmosphere through the Ques
tion and Answer segment. They
launched it by posing the question.
Continued on page 7
International Affairs Heat Up
By Lyndsay Mayer
The National Geographic Society
polled 18-24 year olds in nine coun
tries on their “geographical literacy,”
(“From the President,” National
Geographic, Jan. 2003). Only 13%
of Americans were capable of iden
tifying Iraq on a map and only 23%
correctly “named four countries with
nuclear weapons.”
The week in review: a breakdown
of the showdown
Saturday, 15 Feb. saw millions of
people world-wide take to the streets
in protest of the Bush Administra
tion’s decision to employ military
intervention in Iraq. 200,000 in
Sydney, 100,000 in San Francisco,
and even a few hundred in Asheville
joined to announce their disapproval.
Smaller groups gathered to quietly
show their support of Bush’s efforts,
with signs reading, “war is bad, evil
is worse” (MSNBC.com).
Also over the weekend, five Bah
raini men were arrested for attempted
terrorist attacks on American citi
zens stationed in Bahrain, home to
the Navy’s 5"’ Fleet. Bahrain has
remained an ally to the U.S. since the
Gulf War, but security has remained
high after the 2000 attack on the USS
Cole in Yemen, which took the lives
of 17 American sailors.
NATO is comprised of 19 allies,
and all decisions must be unanimous.
Last week, Gennany, Belgium and
France opposed NATO protection of
Turkey, who has consented to allowing
U.S. troops to station tltemselves in
Turkey in exehange for NATO protec
tion. Turkey is a valuable ally, as it bor
ders Iraq to the north. On the evening of
Sunday, 16 Feb., France was tlie only
remaining opponent to die bolstering
of Turkish borders. NATO decided to
override France’s vote and approved
the motion. NATO Secretary-General
George Robertson was quick to com
ment, “These decisions are purely for
the defense of Turkey,” he said. “Tltis is
not a step toward war.” (CNN.com)
As of 17 Feb. France is joined
by Gennany, Belgium, Luxemburg,
Greece and Austria in the stand
against Bush’s decision to resort to
military intervention with Iraq. The
UK, Spain, Italy, Denmark and the
Netherlands are in support of US
plans to invade. Ireland, Sweden,
Finland and Portugal have not made
Continued on page 7
Students Retreat
Into Catacombs
By Erin Maguire
About thirty students crowd
together on Gaither stage every
Wednesday at 10 p.m. to confide in
Christ and flee into the freedom of
worship at Catacombs.
The word catacombs ventures
back to the days of ancient Rome.
The catacombs served as an under
ground place of eternal rest for the
dead. Christians retreated to the cata
combs to avoid persecution.
The flickering light of candles cir
cling the group provides a soothing
calm atmosphere where students can
experience personal worship along
side one another. Some sway. Others
rise and raise their hands. Some sit
and sing while others wait for the
next song they know better.
“We decided to start a worship ser
vice here at Montreat. We had heard
stories from other colleges of night
services where students just take a
break from school, homework and all
the stuff we deal with during the day.
It’s a time to seek after God and also
a time to hold each other up in prayer,
eneouragement and as bros and sis
Continued on page 2
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