page 6
sports opinions
October 00
“Sleep” And the Lord said: Let there be Bruce
From
PAGE
Jon Dougherty
and many students seize these
opportunities with vigor. Many
students, however, find them
selves overextended and need
to sacrifice sleep in order to
maintain good grades and a
thriving social life.
Most young people,
however, are unaware of these
sleep statistics, and polls con
ducted by the National Sleep
Foundation reveal more and
more young adults are sleeping
less to either get more done or
simply spend time in front of the
TV or computer. Sleep depriva
tion can indeed have grave ef
fects on performance, and
studies such as those men
tioned above have recently per
suaded a small number of
schools around the country to
begin their classes later in the
morning, or in the most extreme
cases, in the after noon.
Sleep deprivation can
also have more dangerous con
sequences. A full sixty percent
of those 18-29 years old have
revealed they have driven while
drowsy, and twenty six percent
of those in the age group who
actually seek sleep aid turn to
alcohol, which is not only dan
gerous when combined with
other sleeping aides, but actu
ally hinders sleep.
When you can’t get
enough sleep, several things
can be done to allay the conse
quences of sleep deprivation.
When you do sleep, try and do
so at a regular time each night,
and don’t sleep in extremely
late; this confuses your biologi
cal clock, which can also impede
performance. Also, take short
naps when you can, since many
of the important phases of sleep
occur soon after one falls
asleep. Once you do get up, get
into bright light as soon as pos
sible, which helps as a brain sig
nal that it is time to get up and
stay awake. When about to go
to bed, though, stay away from
bright light as this serves as a
brain signal to go to sleep. To
wake up fully refreshed, try to
avoid caffeine, nicotine, and
other stimulants before going
to bed. Try to avoid alcohol as
well, as this disrupts sleep. Re
laxing before going to bed also
assists in having a more restful
and refreshing sleep. Lastly, try
to get into a set pattern of go
ing to bed at a certain time and
waking up at a certain time. By
doing so, you will set your bio
logical clock and will not only
give you better sleeping habits,
but will also help repair or avert
any physical, intellectual, emo
tional, or mental damage caused
by sleep deprivation. And you
could even consider starting
your homework before 12:00 and
not going to Happy Half or talk
ing to your friends all night.
Ahh, sport. So pure. So
untouched. So innocent.
Hey, you. Yeah, you
with the paper. Snap out of it.
Today, sport is such a hodge
podge of greed, commercialism,
and scandal there are only a few
parts left undisturbed by mod
em mass entertainment. And
now, players are encroaching on
another area that should just be
left alone.
God in sport. Now, lets
get a few things straight. When
I say “God,” I am not Just talk
ing about the Christian faith, al
though that is the largest
denomination practiced in
American athletics. I am also
not bashing religion. Please,
let’s keep it clear that the fol
lowing commentary says AB
SOLUTELY NOTHING BAD
ABOUT RELIGION! Now that
we have established that I am
not a raging God-killer, lets
move along with the article.
Isaac Bmce, while we
in the bubble may not have
heard about him, is a very fa
mous man in the football world.
He made the winning catch in
last year’s Super Bowl for the
St. Louis Rams that sealed their
victory. He was, of course, very
excited about his play and that
of his team. However, he made
a statement that makes sports-
writers everywhere queasy.
“That wasn’t me (out
there.) That was all God. 1 knew
1 had to make an adjustment on
the ball, and God did the rest.”
To hear Bruce tell it, God
was hovering somewhere
above the field, with a bunch of
betting slips on the Rams, just
nudging Bruce into the right
position to catch the ball. How
can people say that God had a
hand in the outcome of a major
American sporting event? That
is just ludicrous. Sport is a man
made invention. There is noth
Isaac Bruce credits God with his sports success
ing divine about it. The great
players of sport, such as
Michael Jordan, Greg Maddux,
or Deion Sanders, are not saints
by any stretch of the imagina
tion. While we may place them
on a pedestal, there is no rea
son to think that they may be
the chosen ones of God.
Now, when players have
a great game and they are sit
ting in the locker room in their
towels, they often like to thank
God for helping them rise to the
occasion, or leading their team
to victory. I can understand
why players thank God for their
health or even their talent. We
do not know where talent comes
from. Maybe it comes from a
higher power. Maybe it has to
do with genetics. We don’t
know. But when a player thinks
that a deity had anything to do
with a play, that a burst of shin
ing light came through the
clouds and guided the ball into
the hands of the
player or into
the net or what
ever, they are
just deluding
themselves.
Taking a knee
after a touch
down, forming
the sign of the
cross before
stepping into the
batter’s box, all
of these things
are blatant mis
uses of religion.
Hey, you wanna
be a religious
faithful? Fine.
No one is stop
ping you. Take
Reggie White. The man, who
happens to be one of the great
est linebackers of all time for the
Green Bay Packers, is a rever
end. But he leaves it off of the
field. He never refers to some
holy maker influencing his style
of play. The great players work
hard and make their own luck.
When something spectacular
happens to them, they attribute
it to hard work, the support of
their family and team, and just
being in the right place at the
right time. But they know that
there is no holy power that just
happens to be a Bulls fan and
that is why Mike and Co. won
all of those championships.
A few days before the
Super Bowl, Bruce and Chiefs
linebacker Derrick Thomas are
driving two separate cars in two
separate locations. Both have
terrible wrecks. Both are not
wearing their seatbelts. When
firefighters arrive at the first
wreck, they say they have never
seen a car so badly crushed.
They are sure no one is alive.
Isaac Bruce and his girlfriend
crawl from the car barely
scratched. In Thomas’ wreck,
the car does not appear to have
been damaged that badly. How
ever, the man in the passenger
seat is dead and Thomas, the
driver, has a broken spinal
chord.
In an interview with
Sports Illustrated, Bruce was
asked if he felt that he could
have ended up as Thomas, who
was paralyzed from the chest
down for a about a month be
fore he died of a heart attack.
He replies, “Oh, no, not at all.”
When asked why, he says,
“When the car was flipping, I
threw my hands off of the wheel
and called Jesus’ name.”
He was then asked if that
means God doesn’t love Derrick
Thomas.
He replied, “I don’t know
what Derrick said as he was flip
ping.”
The reporter then asked
about Payne Stewart, who died
in a plane crash earlier this year
and who was a devout Chris
tian. Would invoking the name
of Jesus have saved him?
“Oh, definitely.”
God save us all.
The Knight is Over
Jon Dougherty
The saga has ended.
America is now faced with a
prospect that we have not had
to deal with for the last 29 sea
sons. We may have to look at
Bobby Knight in a sweater that
is not red. Yes, that’s right. Bob
Knight will not be prowling the
sidelines, barking at officials and
players alike, of Indiana
University’s basketball court.
After a tyrannical reign of 29
years, Knight has been fired as
head cpach of men’s basketball
at lU. It all began 10 years ago
when Knight was videotaped
choking an lU freshman player
during a fit of anger during a
praetice. The president of the
school, Milton Brand, had put
Knight on a zero-tolerance
policy. Knight’s temper, which
is legendary even outside of
basketball circles, was the cause
of his downfall. A cocky 19-
year-old, while walking across
campus with his buddies, per
haps in a surge of youth bra
vado, asked the crusty skipper
“How’s it going, Knight.” Eye
witnesses testify that Knight
Brand. After about a week’s
deliberation, the deed was done.
Knight is out on the street with
his luggage
flying behind
him. I gotta
tell ya, I can
not be happier.
I have hated
Knight ever
since I first
started follow
ing college
sports. He is
the antithesis
of everything
collegiate ath
letics stand for.
Maybe in
today’s whiny,
^overpaid,
^.overrated
P NBA, where at
least players
by Knight, ex-coach of lU’s basketball team will choke
grabbed the freshman by the coaches back, Knight’s behav-
arm and told him to have respect
for elders. Have RESPECT for
his elders?! What a hypocrite.
That was the last straw for
ior might acceptable. The man
has ruled with an iron-fist. He
has yelled at little, old secretar
ies just trying to take a memo.
He has head-butted players
when they don’t play well.
Well, we will just have to find
our entertainment in the WWF.
1 will admit, Knight has his tal
ents. If I were sending players
to an intimidation boot camp,
Knight would be my choice as
drill sergeant. If there was a
chair-throwing event in the
Olympics (as it looks there may
be in the years to come, based
on the new sports that are being
added) Knight would be the
champion of the world. Other
than that, the man is not a good
basketball coach. If you can
not make your players perform
without having to scream and
threaten, then you do not de
serve the spot you hold. Knight
says that him coaching this sea
son is not unfeasible. We can
only hope that the other teams
in the country will realize that
the wins do not outweigh the
hassle that this man brings to a
team. I surely hope that Knight
will forevermore have to keep
his chair-throwing antics in the
stands.