april 1, 2014
the backpage
the stentorian I ncssm
Top ten reasons athletes should choose NCSSM
By Steven Liao -
At NCSSM, scholarly doors
open. Badges of academie
excellence grace the halls.
Every fiber of the school
screams opportunity. But can
NCSSM serve as a similar
haven for athletes? Here are the
top ten reasons why athletes
should choose NCSSM.
Honorable Mention: The
Uniflex
With the mascot like the
Unicom comes a pose like
the Uniflex. For those who
don’t know what the Uniflex
is, NCSSM Student Life
Instructor Sue Anne Lewis
explains, “The Uniflex is
like the Wolfpack wolf hand,
the FSU tomahawk, or the
Miami U...it’s a hand gesture
that all recognize as NCSSM.
Simply put your thumb to
your forehead with your pinky
in the air, followed by a loud
‘bam,’ and lean back a little.”
10. Exercise is Convenient
A five-minute walk from
your dorm room. No more
paying monthly gym fees. No
more driving to the gym.
9. Fitness Center at your
Disposal
Fitness rooms at most
schools are not available for
general use. At. NCSSM, the
PEC, which is more like a
fitness center equipped with
a gymnasium, dance studio,
weight room, and more, is
fully available to all students.
8, NCSSM is Good at
Hiding Swimming Pools
People frequently wonder,
“How is NCSSM’s swimming
team so good without a
swimming pool?”
NCSSM has a deep
swimming tradition. Rumor
has it that back in NCSSM’s
hospital days, a swimming
pool filled the “L” shape of
Hill. And the PEC has an
awfully suspicious amount of
ladders and leaks from its roof
Oh and there’s more. Have you
heard of the pool beneath the
soccer field?
7. Research Makes Sports
Stentorian
staff does
not read
Stentorian
Staff Reports
The Stentorian Staff, in
a surprising admssion last
week, revealed that they do not
actually read the Stentorian at
all.
“To be honest, by the time I
finish formatting each issue, I
am sick of looking at it,” said
Editor Adam Beyer, “I actually
consider it great to use for
wrapping paper.”
“It’s true,” said Editor Su
Cho. “The fact that we do not
have more errors is really all
beeause of our amazing writers
and our great advisor, Mr.
Kirk.”
Editor Jungsu Hong could
not be reached for comment
either. Presumably, she was
busy not reading the Stentorian
either.
More Stimulating
For some really hardcore
athletes, playing the sport
alone does not provide enough
stimulation. Senior Jake
Bringewatt was one of those
athletes.
Bringewatt was able to
take advantage of NCSSM’s
research program to research
the Magnus force, the force
that makes a spinning ball
curve.
“I’ve played baseball for
twelve years. I’ve pitched
a little bit, so when I was
trying to decide on a, physics
research project within my
current capabilities I decided
to look into the physics of a
curve ball. I did figure out a
particular seam orientation that
would lead to maximum lateral
break on a fastball, which I did
experiment with a little,” said
Bringewatt.
So, if playing sports is not
enough for you, NCSSM could
be the perfect place for you
to whet your athletic appetite.
“Since you’re going to be
spending hours working on
your project you might as well
choose a topic that interests
you,” says Jake.
6. Hall Intramurals
What other high school in
North Carolina can boast an
intramural program with over
90% participation?
5. Student-Led Intramurals
What other high school
in North Carolina can boast
an underground ping pong
tournament, a student-led
Ultimate Frisbee team, and a
Flag Football League?
4.£xcellent Array of
Physical Education Classes
What other high school
in North Carolina can boast
classes like Arehery, Couch to
5k, and Zumba?
3. A Community of
Athletes... and Mathletes
At NCSSM, mathletes meet
athletes. Will their worlds
converge or will they clash?
Junior Justice Obasohan ,
a Varsity Basketball player,
says he feels a connection
between the two. “I feel like
everyone has something that
they’re'good at. We both like
to measure our skills against
others and put these skills to
use.”
Senior Sammy Luo, a
celebrated mathlete, says
interactions with the athletic
community have helped
him. “So I found that doing
active things especially with
a group or a team really helps
me use my intuition better in
doing problems, especially
combinatorics problems.”
Overall, it seems most
would agree that NCSSM’s
unique dynamics lend well
towards building a stronger
connection between mathletes
and athletes. As junior Sandeep
Silwal notes, “Here, the lines
are a lot more blurred, I would
say.”
2.Wells Fargo Cup
Winner
NCSSM gets results. The
school is a three-time winner
of the Wells Fargo Cup,
which is given to the top
athletics program in the state
in each respective enrollment
classification. Most recently, in
2011-2012, NCSSM won the
1A Wells Fargo Cup. The Cup
awards points, based on each
school’s performance in state
championship events.
1. NCSSM Undefeated in
Football Since 1982
It’s true; NCSSM, in its
entire history, has not suffered
a single loss in football. The
school’s unblemished football
record is a point of pride for
students and faculty alike, with
shirts sold in the school store
touting this accomplishment.
And something tells me this
accomplishment isn’t going
away anytime soon.
Strange events circulate Junior class
Frightening Applicants, Hygiene Lessons, Compromising Positions?
By Andrew Peterson
The stresses of NCSSM
have driven many students
over the edge, but recent
incidents have driven many
students completely insane.
While there have been minor
incidents involving students
befriending strange animals
on 9th street or been caught
in “compromising” positions
across campus, the incident of
immediate eoncem involved a
wild student startling students
on NCSSM’s Discovery Day.
Several NCSSM Student
Ambassadors reported seeing
Norma Leigh Lucid, an
NCSSM Student, startling
Discovery Day applicants
as they walked to their math
test. Students reported
seeing Norma Leigh Lucid
acting like a rabid animal:
growling at random students,
running in and out of the
bushes, screaming about
math problems and American
Studies.
Ann Bingham described
what she saw on that Saturday,
‘‘I was a leading student to
testing when a junior ran out
of the bushes in her pajamas.
-She was screaming something
about a math test, and all of
the juniors were extremely
frightened.”
Several junior volunteers
described the event as comical.
Pepe Roni said, “I thought it
was funny! Norma Leigh is
always joking around. She may
have taken it too far this time,
but 1 think her actions reflect
the true values of NCSSM:
free expression, emotional
instability, and personal
freedom.”
Lucid was quickly removed
from the public eye before
her presence created enough
scandal to completely disrupt
Discovery Day, but her actions
haye caused a wide reaction on
campus. Norma Leigh has not
been seen since the incident,
but there are rumors Norma
has been taken into the clinic.
According to a reliable
source named Ray Zenz, “I
saw her being pulled into Hunt
during the junior’s math test.
Dr. Ted E. Baer was dragging
her in as she screamed about a
math test.”
Lucid’s actions may have
startled this year’s applicants.
But the entire school has
been unnerved by her actions.
This most recent unsettling
event has followed a string of
strange events in the junior
class. Rumors have circulated
about X. Benedict having a
breakdown in the PFM and
Ivan Oder being pulled into the
clinic for a lesson in personal
hygiene.
These events may all
be. explained by the graffiti
that decorated campus in
the previous weeks. The
juniors’ acts may be their
attempts to “Revolt against the
administration!”
No matter their intentions,
their actions have created a
sense of confusion within the
Administration. Everyone is
waiting in anticipation for
what is going to happen next.
Tori asks!
I am tired of answering all
of your questions. You guys
have some real problems so I
have some questions for you
1. Why is myNCSSM a
thing?
2. How eome everytime I
walk around I see a sketchy
couple on the ground?
3. What’s up with the Toilet
Paper, y’all?
4. Why are you all so rude
to the PFM workers?
5. Why aren’t there more
mixers this year?
6. What is I-Week?
7. What does Stentorian
even mean?
8. Why is prom so freaking
early?
9. How come I can never
get wifi?
10. Why can’t y’all make
popcorn?
11. Does anyone actually
check out books from the
library anymore?
12. Can someone tell me
why my name is Tori?
13. Why are the juniors
sitting on the senior benches?
14. Why does the 2015/2016
Facebook page already exist?
Seniors ain’t gone yet.
15. Are there really ghosts
here?
16. What are y’all doing for
Spring Break?
17. How many pairs of
sweatpants do you own?
18. Why don’t you read the
Stentorian?
the
stentorian
the north Carolina school of scicrce ami mathenwiics
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Editors-in-Chief: Adam Beyer, Su Cho, Jungsu Hong
News Editor: Kanan Shah
Features Editor: Sarah Colbert
Entertainment Editor: Ava Gruchacz
Opinion Editor: Andrew Peteison
Sports Editor: Steven Liao
Photography Editor: Zihui Ys^
Advisor: John Kirk
Staff Writers: Evan Brooks, Caroline Liu, Richard
Ong, Hannah Walrath, Zhu
Check us out on the web at
www.ncssm.edu/stentorian!