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The AC Phoenix / i I , . April 2004 -t.* Page 11 I’M ALLERGIC TO ALLERGY SEASON iH ai m By: A1 Wiseman Ahhhh...springtime in Atlanta, and the dogwoods and azaleas are blooming. As we celebrate the arrival of spring, I’m preparing for Atlanta’s “fifth season.” That’s right—we have summer, winter, fall, spring and ...ah...ah...ACHOOO! Allergy season. You know the symptoms - the sneezing, runny nose, sinus headaches, nasal congestion, itchy, puffy eyes - you look like you just lost a 12-round fight with Mike Tyson. During allergy season, Atlanta’s pollen count is usually in the 2,000 to 5,000 range, compared to the National Weather Service’s safe level for humans, which is around 120. From late March to mid-June, everything is covered in a thick blanket of yellow dust. I remember my first allergy season. It took me totally by surprise. They forgot to mention this in the brochure. I remember walking outside to my car one morning and saying, “HEY! WHAT’S ALL THIS YELLOW STUFF ALL OVER MY CAR?” We serious allergy sufferers spell relief: “D.R.U.G.S.” I bet half the population of Atlanta is walking around on drugs right now. I’ve tried everything for relief—decongestants, antihistamines, Neo-Synephrene, tetracycline. Vaseline, Advil, Benadryl, NyOuil, DayQuil, Be Still, Sudafed, Actifed, Tylenol, Ty-D-Bowl, Dimeatapp and Similac. I’ve tried pills, tablets, caplets, capsules, nasal strips, drops, sprays, mists, inhalers, exhalers, lotions, potions, gels, jellies, salves, rubs, balms, oils, frankincense and myrrh. The only thing that works is prescription drugs. It was a great day when the FDA made Claritin available over-the-counter. Before that, if you couldn’t get an appointment with your doctor, you had to buy it “on the street” from ruthless dealers selling it at a “street value” of five times the prescription price. So,^THANK YOU to our government for taking this much-needed drug outtof the doctor’s offices and putting it on the street where it belongs! Al Wiseman is a Decatur-based speaker, writer and motivational humorist E-mail him at alwiseman@crossroadsnews.com EGG'CELLENT CISTOMERS CAN BE FOUND IN THE ADVERTISE TOUR BUSINESS TODAY! (and Every Hon/hl) mm WILLIE GUESS Sales Consultant 140 S. Stratford Rd. Winston Salem, NC 27101 Phone(336) 760-7000 Fax(336) 760-7021 021 d oriHl
The AC Phoenix News (Winston-Salem, N.C.)
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April 1, 2004, edition 1
11
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