niH vou ever wonder whv
- --..j oviuv (Jtwjic nave an ui.
Lho luck Wltn the ODDOSlte uhiU ik. r
pie are unsuccessful and unhappy? Have you
r wondered whv some nmnii ..,v, j . i
k uu iiui nave
Lour good looks and intelligence are more sue
..refill than vou? -
,t JJ " " ' .
There is a psychology to making a person fall in
iii with VOU that is simnU'anrt ff-,. c
people apply it without- being aware that they are
loing so. Let's examine some basic and important
)rincipl and procedures. Explanation: If John ap
pears to have a dozen girl friends (or Mary a dozen
,oy friends), he will seem to be eligible. People will
. ' -I. . P Inhn - A , r , .....
nmn. "j a uun gin menas, it tonows
hat I must be a very special person if ! can get him
o date me. When we go out people will look at me
n envy and this will be good for my ego and self
.nnfidence. I will do evervthino (hat I nn t ni
- - - - "C" " vun i v .v
,101 to ask me for a date." On the other hand "If
lack does not have many girl friends but has a dif
ficult time getting a date, there must be something
wrong with him, If I go out with him people will
laueh at me and will not date him even if he asks."
" -n.... -
I WO example iuiiww. .
1. Jack askea jane tor a date and Jane accepted
;1 . ---,------- g-MMjws-ww-www-.
if
0 Coping -
The Psychology of Love Making
By Dr. Charles W. Faulkner
i
1
immediately. Four times each day in the following
, week Jane telephoned Jack thanking him for his in-
vitatkm and checking to see if he bad changed his
mind- Jack began to suspect that Jane had no other
offers for dates and he began to lose interest in her.
-. fl. Mary invited Bill to a party at her Home, Bill
began to stop Mary every time that he saw her to
V praise her. He told her that she was beautiful, in-1
telligent, mature, fun to be with, the kindest person
he had ever met, and the most astute person he had
. ever met. Mary felt that she did not deserve the
praise and felt that Bill simply had no close woman
companion. She lost interest in Bill. , f .
The two above cases indicate one of the most
common truisms in male-female relationships: No ;
. one wants anyone no one else wants. In example
No. I, Jane's continued telephone calls to Jack,
made Jack feel that she had no other suitors and
was hanging on to him for fear that she would lose
him and be left alone and lonely, In example No. 2, :;'
Bill's eagerness to praise Mary, even when she felt
that she did not deserve the praise, made Mary
think that Bill had no other female companion She"
did not want him because she felt that na one else '
wanted him. ' . - . ' .
Most people adore the individual who fs adored.
or whom they think is adored, by other people. I his
strategy is followed by advertisers who tell, you that ,
thousands of people are rushing to purchase a par-., .
ticular brand of. car wax," or hurrying to seethe
latest movie, or rock star, or enthusiastically buying
a !pecific brand of clothing. The people wh.o hear
SATURDAY. AUSUST 7. 1332-TKE CAHGUNA
this advertising become very excited. They feci that
if everyone else is purchasing the item it must be a
product good enough for them. They think that
they are "really getting something." Thus, adver
tisers get rich by making people think that the world .
is beating a path to their doorway. Whether this i
actually true is not important. However, if people
think that it is true, they will become aroused and
select that specific product over competitive brands r
(that may, in fact, be superior in quality).
- The very psychology applies to people as well. If '
someone thinks that other people consider you to be
attractive they wilt think that- you are attractive ;
also. Whether you really are attractive to other peo
ple is not important. The important thing is wnai
,they think; If.ihcy think that you are attractive,
they will want to associate with you.:,
Your suggestions are welcomed. Suggestions for
future articles will be appreciated-Cassette tapes of
t this and other articles arc available for individual
use.' discussion groups and classroom use. All let
ters and inquiries should be sent to Dr. Charles W.
Faulkner,' P.O. Box 50016. Washington. DXV
20004.
I attended the first part of the Democratic mid- '
term National Party Conference in Philadelphia
reeently. I forsook the opportunity to vote to over
ride a Presidential veto in the House last Thursday
to attend what ! considered to be an opportunity to
make a greater contribution to the welfare of blacks
at the Party Conference.
I knew that even if the House overrode the Presi
dent's veto of a program tp subsidize the interest on
mortgages for new homes, the Senate would not. As
it turned out, of course, even the Democrat
controlled House could not muster the necessary
289 votes to override the Presidential veto. The
Democrat-Controlled House could muster only 253
votes to override and they had to win the votes of 53
Republicans, to do that.
However, as the only black Member of Congress
in attendance at the preliminary Democratic Na
tional Committee (DNC) Black Caucus' meeting in
Philadelphia, I was permitted to suggest an amend
ment to the DNC's proposed Resolution on Ac
countability, The original Resolution stated:
"In that many people of this nation have express-
Every year in this country some half-million
black families will buy a house, one about every 60
seconds. It is safe to say that another half-million
will begin thinking about it. If you are among this
group you are perhaps already aware that purchas
ing a home today is hot easy. The purchase is com
plicated, not only by the myriad new types of mor
tgages involved, but by the importance of a well
chosen home to a family's economic well-being and
status. This is one time you cannot afford to make a
mistake.
America is often called a "nation of
homeowners," but for a large majority of blacks a
"nation of home occupiers" would more accurately
describe the situation. More than three out of five
black families do not own houses, they rent their
dwellings. Of the remainder, about 75 per cent live
in property that is mortgaged or otherwise financ
ed. Among those who .are. genuine homeowners,
GO
GREYHOUND
FOR
COMFORT
AMD
RELAXATION.
rSSSSSSSSiS
An Independent View From Capitol Hill
Democratic National
Party Conference
Bv Oils Savaoo i
Member of Congress Sr
i ...... .S.rrr&s7-
ed outrage at the Republican Administration's
economic policy and its blatant assault against the
poor, disadvantaged and working Americans; and
. "In. that this Party has continually reiterated its
support of the principles of justice and equality of
opportunity, economic freedom and dignity of the
human quality of life for all Americans;
"Let the record show that the sense of the DNC
Executive Committee is that elected Democrats
must be held accountable, not merely in rhetoric
but in action to the principles of this Party and
its leadership."
I was in sympathy of this Resolution's proposal
which was to pressure the "Boll Weevils,"
Democrats who sifpport Reagan's programs in
Congress. Yet, I believe that it was too uncritical of
the Democratic Party's national leadership.
While, by implication, it criticized the gap bet
ween that leadership's advocacy and its action, it
failed to point out that even its advocacy was inade
quate to the needs of Blacks.
Therefore, I suggested amending the second
paragraph to read, ". , . .this (Democratic) Party
has continually reiterated more support than has
the Republican Party for the principles of justice. ."
' The point of this modification was to make it
clear that the Democratic Party had advocated
these principles merely more than the Republican
Party but not necessarily sufficiently. The other
modification I proposed was to add after that
paragraph the following new paragraph:
"And, in that this Party's action on the national
level has failed to match its advocacy, even though
its advocacy has been insufficient to the need to
substantially and immediately alleviate the gross
discrimination suffered byt Blacks in the United
States;" ; .
On the next day, Friday, I was permitted by my
friend and staunch civil rights advocator. Mayor
Richard Hatcher of Gary, who was chairing the of
ficial Black Delegates meeting, to present this
amendment to the vote of the Black Delegates.
After I did so, labor leader and equal rights
spokesperson, Addie Wyatt, moved its adoption,
and it was adopted by unanimous voice vote.
While the convention may not approve a. at least
I succeeded in getting the Black Delegate to go on
record as criticizing the inadequacy of our Party's
commitment to racial justice.
Meeting Black Housing Needs:
"Is there A House In Your Future? ' '
By William R. Morris, ASPC
Washington Housing Consultant
most are already old enough to be grandparents and
i retired, so let the choice in buying a home be a good
one or at least a thoughtful one.
There is no end to the questions one might ask in
choosing a home, and in fact the more questions,
the better chance you have to make, a sound selec
, lion. For starters, let's begin with a brief checklist
Letter to
An Open Letter to the
Chapel Hill-Carrboro Board of Education
of what the first-time homebuyer needs to know in
making good decisions.
.SEARCHING FOR A HOUSE: Know what you
are looking for in terms of price, type of home,
general location, schools and neighborhood. Visit
as many houses as possible. Check real estate
brokers, neighborhood residents, community
organizations, and city hall (about taxes, schools,
etc.). v;; '
PURCHASE CONTRACTS: Before making an
offer to purchase a home, you should know all
about the house and its problems; how much you
...:u:nn anrf whrther or not the owner is
I eager to sell. After agreeing on the price, a formal
purchase agreement win speii oui ;
conditions of the sale. Before signing an agreement
nhtain a lawver's advice, negotiate the.
I terms, know exactly what the agreement says and
take your time.
FINANCING THE HOUSE: Banks, insurance
companies, credit unions, mortgage companies and
the homeseller all make mortgage loans. Check
several lenders to find the best terms. Obtaining a
loan will probably be expensive. You will probably
have to pay mortgage application fees, legal fees,
appraisal and inspection fees, a loan origination fee
and insurance premiums. The lender must give you
an estimate of these costs within three days of your
loan application. ' , ....
THE CLOSING PROCESS: A typical closing in
volves the transfer of title (ownership) of the pro
perty to you. The lender will list what you owe the
. 'Continued on Page- 16 V'
If you're thinking about
taking a nicei relaxing
vacatioa think about the
nice, comfortable way to
travel Greyhound.
And if you're going to
the World's flair in Knox
ville, Tennessee, be sure
to call us: As the official
motor coach carrier to the
1982Worid'sFMr,we
can takeyou direcuy to the
front gate
And leave the driving to us.
Dear Board Members:
Your recent action to establish the concept of Co
Principals at the Culbreth Jr. High School distu-bs.
the members of the South Orange Black Caw s.
This letter is to express our displeasure. No do t,
your insensitive and blatant action of June 28, J 82
was counter-productive in light of the prof ess
made in the Chapel Hill-Carrboro Community .ur-'
ing the past ten years. We do not argue against our '
right to make the decision, but we certainly a hor
the method that you chose to respond to si ch a
critical issue.
( It is hot our job nor our desire to tell you at d the
superintendent how to manage our schools.
' Howeveri it is our duty to raise issues and concerns
when the citizens are denied the opportunity vo ex
press their feelings about proposed educational
; changes.
Had we been given the opportunity, we would
have explored some sensitive and probing issues
'which needed exploration before the vote was
taken. We would have asked, are we to infer from
the proposed change that the current principal of
the Culbreth Jupior High School is incapable of
performing his responsibilities?
' If the. above, is true, then it seems to us that
lanother appropriate action should have been tried
first. We hold that the administrative staff should (
jhave designed a program of action for the principal
to improve his effectiveness as an administrator, if
he were found to be lacking some skills.
Is the lack of discussion a scheme to hide the
principal's alleged shortcomings or is it a further ex
tension of cruel racism disguised as incompetence?
The issue is raised because it is a known Cact that
black educational leadership at the principal level
has bejen steadily eroding.
We are seriously questioning the reduction in the
number of minority principals in our school district
during the present administrative leadership. The
district has gone from a high of 3 minority prin
cipals under the former leadership in 1981 to a low
of 1.5 principals for 1982-83. Why such a drastic
change? What is left for us to conclude? We do not
fully understand your collective wisdom of intent
but a very clear signal has been communicated ta
us. Obviously, the educational black leadership is
being eroded through a timely and calculated pro
gram as evidenced by the decision which placed the
sensitive issuMpn the consent agenda in order to
eliminate full discussion by board members and the
;.. public.
We submit that the key leadership should have
known that an issue as sensitive as the one proposed
deserved full and public discussion in any com
munity, and particularly . in the Chapel Hill
Carrboro Community. ,
Moreover, the experience of the Co-Principal
concept has not been researched substantially to
1 convince us of its viability and worthiness. The ad
ministrative staff through its own admission con
cludes that this needless "experiment" is estimated
to cost between five and ten thousand dollars. It
seems to us that costs are no factor when it comes to
destroying black educational leadership. A majority
of the board has spoken rather definitively to this
fact. Your action of June 28 speaks so loudly that
your precepts on paper are no longer valid with us.
Hank Anderson, Chairman
South Orange Black Caucus . -
a '
-1 , -: -
1 i '
. ; j.
i- . ,N
&m
'I
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