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FINNEY OF THE FORCE
One-Man Riot Squad
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SOCKS TW' LEADER. WlT' ME
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GUYS AN' KNOCKED tHBIR HEADS
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SWATTER POP? High Finance By C. M. PAYNE |
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"REG'LAR FELLERS"
Yes We Have No?
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Lolljg Gags
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^ Our Pet Peeve "By M. G. KETTNERj [ j |
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FEUS PROUD TO QE CROWN UP
OW06H n> BE DRJNWN6 MlUO
FTOH A M06_y^tAp or A Beroc
SH6WS MOWER HOW NICELY
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HANDLE MU6 HIMSELF, MUCH
TO MOWER'S ALARM
COMPROMISE IS FFTECTFD
WRFRE3T BOTH HE AMD MOTHER
HOLD THE MU6
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*6REEMEflr AS TO WHICH Dl
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wiping wr mop up, thus ai
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prevent further accident sats
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AND JERKS HfAD BACK RE
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TH? SOTTLC WAS SIMP1FP.
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WILLI
ROGERS
EEVERLY IIILLS,?Well all I know
j is Ju3t wh-.t I read In tbe papers, or
what 1 gather es I roll down bill and
;now all these fel
ows that write con
iuually and grow
ind grow instead of
jiving everybody a
)ain in the neck as
do. When I write
something that dont
igree with em they
hrow me in the ash
:an and they dont
ead me any more,
ind maby next
veek I might agree
wiiQ em, out uiey uuui wan iu dcc.
But its as I was saying before. Some
other minor thought interrupted me.
O. O. Mclntyre, Irvin Cobb, Bugs Baer,
and of course Mr. Brisbane, they can !
Just keep growing in popular favor, for
they can write about anything, and they
can make it marvelously readable. Bugs
makes it funny, and when I say funny
brother I mean funny. He has the queer
est and most unique and original slant
on humor than any man in the world.
You know darn it that fellow Is a
marvel.
And Cobb of course has lived and
outlived wrote and outwrote all the
men of his time. Humor, but humor
combined with a great sense of human
understanding. No "Nut" humor in
Cobb. Its based on years of reporting.
And by the way the best reporter the
old New York World ever had. And its
based on years of mingling, studying,
and getting next to all classes of people.
I would rather have him on a movie
story with me than any man I ever saw.
He knows what to keep you from doing.
Its kinder like a good wife, that dont
"Yes" you all the time. They just tell
you where you are not so hot.
Homer Croy who wrote "They Had
To See Paris" is another that knows
just what a character should do, and
Owen Davis, the great playwright,
(who has had more successes over a
course of years than all of em) he
knows character. There is lots of our
stories where we do thing to get a
laugh, but its not the thing that the real
man who we are playing would do. Well
thats all not done by one man, its done
by two or three men working with a
director who can tell when a laugh is
out of tune. Cobb, Croy, and Davis can
do it.
Now this fellow Oh Oh Mclntyre Is a
character, that same as one we play on
the stage, but he is fortunate in know
ing what to do himself. Nobobdy has
to walk around and tell him. His read
ers picture him, they visualize him
meeting these various celebrities. They
see him walking among the out of the
way places in New York. They know
that they are getting an authentic pic
ture of New York in all its phases. ;
(And is read more than all the other j
N. Y. writers put togaether). He can
sit down at hi9 desk and write a col
umn about his typewriter ribbon not j
working, but darn it, thats whats hap
pening. We dont know one tenth of
these people that drop in, or that he
meets on the street, or at various par
ties. They are Esquimos to us, but by
golly before we are finished we think
we know em too. He likes to use big
words, but he is sure to have enough
little ones in there, so us dumb ones
dont lose out entirely. And he is liable j
to run you to the dlctinary, (he never !
did me for I havent got any. I imagine '
you had guessed that by now).
That brings us to my older friend, Mr
Brisbane, the daddy of all of em. A man
I expect with more talents than any
man in the newspaper game. A great
judge of what millions of people want
to read. If a newspaper is bogged down
in quick sand, or if it has the heeves,
Mr Hearst sends old Doc Brisbane
there. He operates. The patient not
only recovers, but thrives. No other
writer in America can do that. They
can write, but when they have finished
writing then they are through. They
may know how to write their editorial,
or column, but they dont know what
should be In the 50 or 100 columns.
But to go back to the eubject of my
original oration, Mr Brisbane knows an
awful lot about a lot of things. I dident
know what panaort
the earthquakes In
Japan till away last ,
week when he told
It. They are on the
edge of a tremen
dously deep deep ^
canyon in the ocean,
and its the land *
?lipping off in this
canyon. Now that
makes sense and -
its plain aint it?
Well thats what he
writes. They are for
lUu?io lucu mat can ao mat. 1 am j
always kidding about something the 1
Democrats did to the Republican, and
then I got the Republicans on my back,
then I will sing a praise of some Repub
lican uprising, and 1 will have all the
Democrats down on me. My Junk is al
ways controversial. Thats all because I
havent got the range of knowledge, the
background ot reading, the literary
foundation. There Is Just so much you
can say In praise, or In reprimand of
our Government. And when 1 Just keep
saying It over and over again. It dont
stand np like those other bays, and
dont I know It
C tin. UtMmmtU Im.
CAN BE ADAPTED
TO SUIT WEARER
PATTERN 21T?
uc a tjutcu in vviivu in 1.1110 1/v.uu i
tifully designed dress. The round'
yoke and panel front are inevitably:
becoming, and the ruffle or puff
sleeves may be omitted if they're
not your type. Or, you may havei
the sleeves in flaring little wings,
simply by omitting the elastic which
makes them puff. (See detail
sketched). In any case, it's an ador
able frock. The most delightful
color combinations are being shown
in cottons now?choose unusual, deli
cate shades or boldly marked pat
terns, In percale, gingham, broad
cloth or lawn?they launder and
wear well.
Pattern 2175 Is available In sizes
14, 16, 18, 20, 32, 34, 36, 38, 40 and
42. Size 16 takes 3% yards 36 inch
fabric. Illustrated step-by-step sew
ing Instructions Included.
SEND FIFTEEN CENTS (15c) In
coins or stamps (coins preferred, for
this pattern. Write plainly name ad
dress, and style number. BE SURE
TO STATE SIZE.
Address orders to Sewing Circle
Pattern Department, 243 West Seven
teenth Street, New York.
--
DEFINITION
Izzard?How would you define >
picnic?
Jitters?A picnic is a day set apart
to get better acquainted with ants,
bngs, worms, mosquitoes, chiggers,
sand-fleas and poison ivy.
Gob Humor
Uncle and niece stood watching
the young people dance about them.
"I'll bet you never saw any danc
ing like that back in the nineties, eh,
uncle?"
"Once?but the place was raid
ed !"?Contact (Air Fleet Base, Canal
Zone).
Unemployment Problem
Prisoner?All that Is worrying me,
Judge, if you send me to prison, is the
number of persons depending on me.
Judge?Family?
Prisoner?Xo. Detectives.
Better Days
Jim?That umbrella of yours looks
as though it has seen better days.
George?Well, it certainly has had
its nps and downs.
19331
Ppj
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Wm
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