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®l)e Cftatlotte 1&ost LIFESTYLES 7 A THURSDAY September 23, 1993 'oping CHARLES FAULKNER Conquering Your Sexual Problems Sexual dysfunction is the failure of the sexual organs to perform properly during the act of sexual Intercourse. The dysfunction, or physical malfunction, can take many forms and can have Its ori gin in one's early upbringing. The inability to attain erec tion, to reach climax and to enjoy the pleasures of sex can be caused by the fears, guilt, em- I barrasment and shame I that one as sociates I with the sexual ex perience. I These atti tudes are I usually so deeply Im planted In the subcon scious that they reveal themselves only when the victim thinks about, talks about, or Is In vited to participate in the sexual act. A distressful past experience, such as rape, or a subtle experience like a strict religious upbringing can be the root of the attitudes that cause one to think that sex is bad, dirty or evil. At the moment of sexual contact, embarrassment and guilt may cause premature ejaculation, impotence and similar unwanted, but un controllable, physical and behavioral responses. A mate who is argumentative, unaffectlonate, demanding and uncooperative can ini tiate the unpleasant sexual responses by putting the spouse on the defensive and causing feelings of insecuri ty- The paradox here is that the person who is not ful filled during the sexual ex perience can actually be the cause of the problem and promote its continuance by being tense and blaming the unfortunate spouse. The spouse, in turn, loses confi dence and almost anticipates failure during subsequent encounters. Problems of this sort are avoidable. Sexual dysfunc tion is curable. The way to completely eliminate it is to fully understand the reason for the problem. Then, de stroy the negative emotions that are associated with sex. Next, realize that you have the equipment that is re quired to satisfy your mate and yourself sexually. The essential ingredients of suc cess are a healthy body, a See Conquering Page IQA A Meal To Impress A First Date ar ms stuffed shrimp with salad and a wine is a meal sure to impress a first date, says Ron Gooodwin A good way to impress somebody on a first date is to cook for them, says Love Chef Ron Goodwin, owner of Affairs to Remember at Ren aissance Place Restaurant. Goodwin guarantees that his recipes for stuffed shrimp and renaissance salad are sure to make those first impressions lasting ones. Stuffed shrimp, a salad and good wine, topped with a light sherbet for dessert make Just the right state ment, Goodwin contends. It's light, so it's not too pre tentious. Yet it takes enough preparation that your guest will know you went to some trouble. "It shows the person that a lot of care went into prepar ing for them," Goodwin said. "It's light and colorful." On his catering menu, stuffed shrimp and salad are dishes that can be pre pared at home by any good cook. But the Love Chef warns that close attention must be paid to the details. 'You need to have time to cook this or it won't come out right," Goodwin said. "Pay attention to the oven temperature for the shrimp so they can be tender. If the temperature is too high, they will dry up fast. The same thing with the salad. / m iiM The dressing really needs a lot of love. It needs to be made several days ahead of time so the Juices can blend." His recipe is based on his Charleston, S.C. roots. His stuffmg is crab based. 'You can use stuffing without crab. There are the bread- based stuffings," he said. Goodwin said the dish be comes memorable when the cook takes enough time to chop the old fashion way instead of using the blender. "The flavor is lost in the blender. It takes time to chop, but if you want It right and to taste very good, you will chop. The stuffed shrimp tastes good because Renaissance chef Mack Epps takes time and using care in preparing the dish. The key to good stuffed shrimp is the stuffing." Recipe for stuffed shrimp 40 fresh Jumbo shrimp (serves eight, five per person) 1/4 cup margarine 1/3 cup chopped red or bell pepper 1 pound crabmeat 1/2 cup coarse saltine cracker crumbs 2 tablespoons chopped par sley 1/2 teaspoon salt dash of pepper 3 tablespoons all-purpose flour 1/3 cup dry white wine 4 ounces Swiss cheese (1 cup) Juice of one lemon In skillet, cook onion in 1 / 4 cup margarine until tend er, but not brown. Stir bell pepper into skillet with flaked crab, cracker crumbs, parsley, salt and pepper. Split shrimp down the middle and stuff shrimp with stuffing. Roll shrimp and place them side down in a baking pan. In sauce pan, melt three tablespoons of butter. Blend in flour and 1 / 4 teaspoon of salt. Add with wine to saucepan. Bake in hot oven (375 de grees) for 15 minutes. Sprinkle with paprika and a couple of dashes of cayenne. Return to oven and bake 10 minutes. Recipe for renaissance salad The stuffed shrimp could be served with the renais sance vegetable salad. This salad includes a very color ful combination of mush rooms, zucchini, red onions, celery, plmientos and green beans, all flavored with a lively garlic vinaigrette. For best results, garlic oil for the dressing should be made at least four days in advance If you don't know exactly when you are going to use it, store it in a cool, dark place until ready to use. Recipe for Dressing Garlic oil (one quart): 4 tablespoon minced gar lic 1 quart olive oil Chapon dressing (1/2 cup): 6 tablespoons garlic od 2 tablespoons red wine vinegar Vegetables 1 cup sliced fresh mush rooms 1 cup fine Julienne crisp zucchini 1/2 cup diced red onions or celery 1/2 cup diced pimlentos 1/4 teaspoon dry mus tard, salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste 1 cup thinly sliced green beans or haricots verts, blanched until barely tend er 2 cups shredded Boston lettuce Garnish: 8 Enoli mushrooms To make garlic oil, sever al days before serving, combine garlic and olive oil. Seal Jar tightly. After three or four days, strain the garlic and store in tightly closed bottle for fu ture use. Combine dressing Ingredients. In a mixing bowl, com bine all vegetables except lettuce and add dressing. Marinate In refrigerator ' T, shredded lettuce on! each salad plate and top with l cup marinated vegetables. Garnish with 1 enoli Mush room and serve with addi tional red wine vinegar and garlic oil. for at least three hour To serve, spread l/>^ cup 'A ' 1'j; ' -S. ■ Parents Control Lessons At Home Schools By Jeff Meyer THE ASSOCIATED PRESS SIERRA MADRE, Calif. - For most kids, the start of school means new teachers, new classmates, new rou tines. But Mary Jo Robison's chil dren have the same teacher, the same classmates, even the same classroom every year - and they wouldn't have it any other way. Mary Jo and Richard Robi son are among a growing number of American parents who have chosen to teach their kids at home rather then send them to public or private schools. "It's nice. If I have a prob lem, all I have to do is ask my mom and she's right there," 13-year-old Aaron told a visitor on a break In his studies at the family's comfortable two-story home east of Los Angeles. The U.S. Department of Ed ucation estimates that as many as 350,000 children are being home-schooled to day, but advocates say the figure is closer to 1 million. That compares to about 15,000 a decade ago. More than 46 million children at tend public schools. Doug Phillips, governmen tal affairs director for the National Center for Home Education In Paeonlan Springs, Va., estimates the number of home schoolers has climbed by about 25 per cent a year for several years. "There's a real growing dis satisfaction with the public school system in America. Parents are looking for al ternatives. They want more control over their children's educations, and they're find ing It in home education," he said. President Clinton has said he supports home schooling. On the Feb. 20 ABC-TV spe cial "President Clinton An swers Children's Questions," Clinton said families should have a right to teach their children at home as long as they are willing to prove through testing that their children are learning. Home schooling Is legal, al though laws differ from state to state. California's are fair ly lax in that parents of home schoolers are not re quired to be certified to teach and no testing of students or momtoring by local school officials is mandated. Not surprisingly, Califor nia has the greatest number of home schoolers in the na tion. State education offi cials estimate that as many as 40,000 children are taught at home. Home schooling ad vocates say the number may exceed 100,000. Crowded classrooms and rising crime have fueled the Interest in home schooling, said Philip Troutt, executive director of the Christian Home Educators Associa tion, California's largest home schooling organiza tion. "When your kid comes home and he's been shot at or had his watch stolen at knife point, then you start looking for alternatives," Troutt said. Parents who choose home schooling do so for a variety of reasons, but many are de vout Christians who don't want to expose their children to the influence of gangs, drugs and early pregnancies. Others feel they can do a bet ter Job educating their kids. Robison said she and her husband chose to teach their children themselves because "we felt like it was what God wanted us to do." "It wasn't repudiation of public schooling. We did it out of obedience" to God, she said. Five of the couple's nine children spend each day stu- d)dng spelling, mathematics. English, history, science, reading and handwriting in addition to a Bible lesson. Two others aren't of school age yet. The couple's oldest chil dren, Nathan, 17, and David, 15, also were taught at home and now attend the Flin- tridge Preparatory School in suburban La Canada- Flintridge. ""They're both A students, well-balanced in verbal and mathematics subjects," said Peter Bachmann, the school's principal."'Nathan is one of our top students in our senior class and Nathan was the top mathematics stu dent In the school last year. "They're both superbly pre pared for rigorous college programs." Both boys have assimilated well. Bachmann said. Na than is in the school's hon ors program and he and Da- See Parents Page 8A INSIDE: RELIGION • • • 9A AROUND CHARLOTTE • • »8A CHURCH NEWS • • • 12A
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