^f)e Charlotte ^osit
THURSDAY, JANUARY 18, 199Q
9A
LIFESTYLES
Parent says
its okay to
try drugs
GWENDOLYN BAINES
Gwendolyn
Dear Gwendolyn:
Yesterday I had a conver
sation with a man who
said it is all right to try
drugs, but don't keep try
ing them. That bothers me.
He is the father of three
teenagers. His wife is a
junkie. I could not con
vince him he should not be
advocating this to his chil
dren. I told him that cer
tain drugs become addic
tive after the first use. I
did not want this conversa
tion to turn into an argu
ment. These days, you
never know what people
are carrying in the form of
a deadly weapon. I'm
upset because I couldn't
seem to reach his thinking.
Olivia
Dear Olivia:
Calm yourself. You could not
reach his thinking because he
doesn't think like you. You
would have had to lower your
level of thought in order to
agree with his. It is sad, how
ever, for the children. The
man's ridiculous statement
bothres me terribly also. Some
children don't have a chance
because they have parents
who use poor judgement.
Children believe in their par
ents. Parents are the first
teachers. When parents give
wrong advice, children have
no way of knowing the advice
jiven is not what's right. By
’he time they realize they
lave been misinformed, it's
too late. A bad habit has
dready been adapted.
This is where teaching chil-
dten early in school about the
dingers of drugs is helpful
and so needed. With a junkie
foi a mother, and a mislead-
inj father, it will be a miracle
thit they do well. However,
thire still may be hope.
Spnetimes people have a nat-
urjl inner sense that tells
them not to destroy their Hves
anc that one day, they can
mo« away from their present
suruundings and succeed.
Do not consider your conver
sation with this man as a fail
ure. He may later give
thought to what you were try
ing b convey, and change his
way »f thinking.
There are so many children,
as well as adults, who need
your idvice. Don't give up the
crusade. Wherever you can,
whenever you can, help them
to say "no.”
If you have a question for
Gwendolyn Baines please send
letters to: The Charlotte Post,
1531 Camden Road,
Charlotte, N.C., 28230
Features
Around Charlotte 10A
Chuich News 13A
Sunday School 12A
Lawbreakers now are becoming younger
By Gina Holland
THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
Mississippi lawmakers have
begun anew to stop juvenile
crime, but any progress in
1996 will be despite some
pretty formidable obstacles
ranging from a cash shortage
to some pessimism.
Both the House and Senate
have set up permanent com
mittees to handle juvenile jus
tice matters.
If it will be a fumbling mess
or a smashing success
depends mostly on Sen. Rob
Smith, D-Richland, and Rep.
Joe Warren, D-Mount Olive,
the committee chairmen.
The problem is obvious.
Criminals are getting
younger. Kids as young as 6
and 8 have been caught com
mitting burglaries and steal
ing cars. Youth Courts offi
cials are at wit's end.
The past two years lawmak
ers have tinkered with the
issue, approving mostly puni
tive nfeasures designed to lock
up young lawbreakers.
The first move of 1996 came
last week at the initial meet
ing of Smith's committee. He
went to the source of the prob
lem, bringing in troubled
youngsters to discuss solu
tions.
A 9-year-old girl with a yel
low ribbon holding up her
ponytail described the “dope
dealers" she has had to dodge
getting home from school.
What got this tiny, sweet-look
ing girl in trouble, some won
dered. She brought a hammer
to school, they were told.
Some of the teens were bit
ter, blaming adults for not
paying them any attention.
Some even felt lawmakers at
the meeting were not really
listening.
The stories of poverty and
parentless-childhoods were
poignant.
Gov. Kirk Fordice left the
session even more convinced
the problem is too big for the
legislature. He said the solu
tion will take “a national
change of heart" despite law
makers who “sit all day long in
government committees and
talk about this problem."
Fordice is on target about
the committees. Lawmakers
are too quick to appoint study
See JUVENILE page 10A
CREATIVE DISCIPLINE
Parent finds
another way
to punish son
By Andrea R. Richards
THE CHARLOTTE POST
any parents find
themselves
between a rock
and a hard place
when it comes ta
correcting a
child's behavior.
They often face the dilemma
of how to effectively discipline
their children without wasting
the child's time.
Joe Brown, the father of aV-
year-old boy, found himself is
this situation. Brown isn't
opposed to spanking or taking
away video games from his
son. Because these methods
don't teach a child anything.
Brown chooses other discipli
nary actions.
"I think you give them school
work instead of other forms of
punishment because school
work only helps them out in
their learning and education,"
the single father said.
"Knowing what we've got to
face tomorrow as children of
the black culture education
should be the main thing that
anyone should try to establish
within their kids. Without
education, we're nothing."
When his son, Shomari
Martemus-Brown, acts disre
spectful, Joe Brown doesn't
just send him to his room.
Shomari goes with a book or
pencil in hand. Brown assigns
Shomari four pages to read or
makes him write an essay on
any given subject if Shomari
deliberately does something
wrong.
If Shomari sees any word
that he is unfamiliar with,
then he must write the word
down, look it up in the dictio
nary to learn the correct pro
nunciation and/ or meaning.
"Another form of punish
ment is to let him write a full
page essay on why he thinks
education is important,"
Brown said.
"As a black man,
knowing what Fm
faced with today, I
think the best thing
for me to do is give
my kid education
and make educa
tion the most
important thing in
his life."
-Joe Brown
Brown got the idea from a
sister who lives in Ohio. He
believes telling his son to read
or write as a form of punish
ment will be more beneficial
to his son as opposed to turn
ing off the television.
"As the world is going on
today, you just know that
Shomari Martemus-Brown and his father Joe Brown work on
school work together. Brown, a single parent, uses homework
and study to discipline his son. Photos/Andrea Richards
somebody is not teaching their
kid anything," he said. "You
just got to stay on top of that
because if don't have any
thing, you've got an education.
At least you've got a start. If
you don't have an education,
then you can just through the
towel in.
"As a black man, knowing
what I'm faced with today, I
think the best thing for me to
do is give my kid education
and make education the most
important thing in his life,"
Brown said.
Shomari, a second-grader at
Merry Oaks Elementary
School, prefers reading and
writing more than spankings.
"I didn't want to do it but I
knew I had to."
The telephone book and
newspapers are other tools to
creatively "punish" your child.
•Have your child look
through the yellow pages,
select a business ad write a
clever as.
•Give your child a list of
your friend's names to look up
in the white pages.
•Tell your child to read a
short editorial in the newspa
per and to underline all the
facts with a green pencil and
all the opinions with an
orange pencil.
•Clip pictures out of the
newspaper and have your
child tell you about the pic
ture or write a list of adjec-
^ive^hatdescrib^thej^ctur^^
Your weekly horoscope
ARIES: (March 2I-April
20)
Use all of the resources avail
able to you. A family argument
may take some extra attention
to straighten out, with no seri
ous fallouts. You may need to
make some choices - between
spending more quality time
with family and friends, or
advancing at work.
TAURUS: (April 21 - May
21)There seems to be some
apparent conflict, but it is of a
healthy variety, and may yield
some unexpected benefits'in
the form of totally new
approaches to routine situa
tions. Don't make hasty deci
sions regarding financial mat
ters until you know the whole
story.
GEMINI: (May 22 - June
21)You and your significant
other may make a wonderful
connection and the sense that
you are growing closer will
bring both of you joy. Success
will be yours, even if it is of a
low-key nature. You know
you've made great strides, and
soon the right people will
notice.
CANCER: (June 22 - July
23)Try to take it easy this
week. You have been going at a
frantic pace, and it will start to
catch up with you. Decisions
made hastily may be flawed, so
put off action until you have all
the facts. Treat yourself to
something special, and maybe
something a little frivolous.
LEO: (July 24- August 23)
You will get ahead by working
hard. Nothing less than your
reputation is at stake, but no
need to worry since your work
is usually above reproach.
Expect a little bit of a delay,
because soon you'll be riding on
the crest of success. The spot
light is yours, you deserve it.
VIRGO: (August 24 -
September 23)Prosperity is
an issue, so instead of whining,
take action. Work a little hard
er and you'll be surprised at
the financial results. A surge of
inspiration will enable you to
get through any potentially
rough situations - clear all
avenues of communication.
LIBRA: (September 24 -
October 23)Use your clout to
get some new and different
changes off the ground at
work. Friends and co-workers
can really come in handy now.
You're working for no less than
the greater good of all involved
- remember this. Don't be
taken in by careless flirting
with someone new.
SCORPIO: (October 24 -
November 22)Keeping your
nose to the grindstone is
admirable to a point, but you
might make a better impres
sion with superiors if your
approach is more balanced.
Learn to give some responsibil
ities to others if you are inter
ested in a management posi
tion. .
SAGITTARIUS:
(November 23 - December
21)You tend to keep your emo
tional distress to yourself, and
this might not be for the best.
Allow someone close to pene
trate your defenses. Your beau
ty comes from within, and cre
ates a glow that is obvious to
others around you. Make plans
carefully to assure a positive
outcome.
CAPRICORN: (December
22 - January 20)A little con
templation will get your week
off on a calm and clear path.
You are pleased with the
results up until now, but do
want to improve your work.
Allow troublesome obstacles to
dissolve themself. You can't
hasten this process by hovering
and worrying needlessly.
AQUARIUS: (January 21 -
February 19)Is your current
relationship a little unbal
anced? If so, playing the role
too faithfully can bring resent
ment and boredom. Maybe a
planned weekend pleasure trip
is just what the doctor ordered.
One or both of you may need to
learn something new. Make
peace with inevitable changes.
PISCES: (February 20 -
March 20)When working on
your financial plan for the
future, avoid putting all your
eggs in one basket. Anything
which looks definite may not
be beneficial in the end.
Diversify investments and
don't expect to get rich
overnight. Any health prob
lems are probably from neglect.
IF THIS WEEK IS YOUR
BIRTHDAY: Catch up on corre
spondence with friends. Be
wary though, encounters with
others may end in emotional
outbursts, which may leave you
a bit bewildered. You may feel
that you are constantly at bat
tle with your significant other,
which leads you nowhere.