14A
STYLE/The Charlotte Post
Thursday November 20, 1997
Parents: play time important
Continued from page 16A
it is an African fabric, but tradi
tionally it’s used during funerals.
It is not appropriate for children’s
toys. When manufacturers chose
the fabrics it gives it an African
look, but it is a misuse of the
cloth.”
Folayan says choosing toys that
are ethnically incorrect can have,,
far-reaching effects on young chil
dren. They may develop insecuri
ties about tbeir looks.
“Ibys are fantasy,” she said. “As
children play, they become part of
their games. You don’t want your
child with short hair to dream
only of long hair.”
Experts say price should not be
a factor in choosing toys, either.
Breaking the family bank does
not necessarily mean children
will be delighted by gifts. Many
appropriate toys are relatively
inexpensive.
! Davis said tbe answer does not
rest with the price tag, and exces
sive spending is not a good idea.
“Young children cannot compre
hend cost, and their favorite toys
often are the least expensive,” she
said. “Stressing the budget to
make the family happy can back
fire by causing extra tension. The
children may even feel responsi
ble for tbe stress.”
Folayan says it’s never too late
to introduce children to ethnically
correct toys. But if children have
only received white dolls, they
may need enticement to play with
/black ones.
• “Begin by talking with the
t * child,” Folayan said. “Give them
j positive messages to affirm their
j self-esteem. Tfell them how beauti-
> fill their hair, lips, eyes and noses
• are. Affirm the beauty of other
people of color who are family
members. Tbys should be used to
reinforce those images.
“It’s going to take time for them
to become comfortable with black
dolls. The important thing is that
parents realize how important it
is that children receive realistic
toys.”
Here are some guidelines for
choosing children’s toys;
• Choose toys that foster cre
ative play. Will it stimulate the
child’s initiative, imagination and
skills?
• Choose toys that help children
learn how to learn. Tbys that
require decision-making can help
build self-confidence.
• Make sure children have a
wide variety of toys. Choose toys
for all the child’s developing
needs.
• Watch the age appropriate
ness of each gift. Don’t rush chil
dren to toys for older ages.
• Choose toys that will grow
with the child. These must be
sturdy to last several years.
• Choose toys that reinforce
self-esteem.
“Play time really is important,”
Folayan said. “Children will
develop self-esteem during aU
activities, including play. Having
inappropriate toys, or toys that
don’t reflect them can be barmful
to children.”
• Choose toys that look like
your child.
“My daughter likes Barbie
dolls,” Folayan said. “A good
choice for us was Nigerian
Barbie. Her features were very
ethnic and a she came with a lit
tle book that explained the ori-
‘Dance chooses just
jthe right number
'Continued from 16A
' Along the way, “Honey Hush”
peeks into the bedroom, tells sis-
tahs how to stop an evil man and
deals vrith sexism.
My personal favorite is “The
Black Church and Churchgoers.”
Nothing is as fiiimy as people in
church.
Included among Dance’s selec
tions is Mabley doing one of her
infamous routines about ber “o-o-
o-l-d-d-ti-d-d-d-d-d-d, pu-u-u-u-u-
u-u-u-n-y, moldy man,”
According to Mabley, her man
was so old and puny that after a
funeral, the undertaker told him
not to leave the mortuary.
In addition to Mabley, Whoopi
Goldberg appears in her alter ego
Fontaine and comedy newcomer
Hazelle does her too-funny “Not
Going to Stop “til I Make it to de
Tbp.”
Dance includes sections from
Alice Walker’s classic “The Color
Purple” (the nasty consequences
of Celie’s “beat her” advice to
Harpo) and Valerie Walker
Wesley’s “Devil’s Gonna Get Him”
and Tina McElroy Ansa’s “Ugly
Ways.”
Also included are hilarious
thoughts and tales from Harlem
Renaissance writer Ann Petry,
actress Ethel Waters and leg
endary blues songbirds Bessie
Smith and BiUie Holiday.
Dance culls slave narratives
and classic black autobiographies
for juicy tidbits like Amanda
Smith’s “Brother Johnson’s
Search for a Colored Wife.” Dance
also does extensive oral research
that yields folk tales “The 15 inch
Pianist,” (you don’t want me to
tell you why that’s funny) and “A
Man Won’t Make a Fool of Me
Twice.”
In addition to the foreword,
poetiprofessor Nikki Giovanni
adds two selections the oft-
repeated “Ego Trippin’” and the
interesting introduction she pro
vides students taking her courses
at Virginia Tbch.
It’s no secret that black people
use humor to get through the
tough times. It’s also no secret
that humor sometimes masks the
sorrow.
Dance realizes that and uses it
to make Honey Hush! a classic.
Tb quote the venerable Moms,
“chile, it sho’ is funny.”
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gins of her outfit and had a map of
African that pinpointed Nigeria.”
Folayan turned down a request
for a black Airline Barbie.
“She was a white doll with a
black face,” Folayan said. “There
was nothing about her that I
found developmentally good for
my children. TTiere just was no
positive.”
Davis recommended gifts with
open-ended activities that will
stretch the child’s imagination.
“Art supplies - like colors,
paper, paint - or boxes with cos
tume-type clothes can entertain
children for hours,” Davis said.
“Kitchen sets, doU houses, balls
and construction toys can be
enjoyed long alter Christmas
day.”
Safety is a major consideration
for all ages, but especially for
those under 3. Davis said to make
sure all toy pieces are larger than
the end of a toilet paper tube.
When giving gifts like bicycles,
skates £md skateboards, include
safety equipment like helmets
and knee pads.
“The most important gifts can
not be purchased. They are the
gifts of time, patience and a high
self-esteem,” Davis said. “Parents
should not let the stress of gift
buying hinder a healthy relation
ship with their children.”
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