I f -
i v
t ?
f 9 The
Scrap Book
How the Old Man Spelled It.
"Look here, ("hurley," said one young
collegian to nnotlu-r who had beeu
asked to run his eye over a letter which
"his friend had written to his father
In which there was the Inevitable re
quest for money, "you've spelled Jug
"I know," said Charley, "but, you
see, I need the cash and don't want
the old man to think I'm putting on
airs. That's how he spells It."
A TRAGEDY.
That's him thnr on his coffin In the cart.
An' that's his wife a-crecpln'
In the crowd, 'wny oft, an' wcepin'.
Oh, tho law is Jest a-breakln' of her
heart!
That's him thar on the scaffol'. See! He
speaks.
Thnr's a woman thnr a.hnldln'
Of tho hands they'll soon bo foldln",
An' tho tears is Jest a-ralnln' down her
cheeks.
That's him thar In tho coffin, lyln' low.
An' the woman first to love him
An' the last to bend above him
la his mother but I reckon yon would
know. Frank L. Stanton.
Emancipated the Mule.
When (he mule cars in Jacksonville,
Fla., were replaced with modern elec
trics, an old time darky watched the
first car go by with n great deal of in
terest. "Um-m-pah. deiu Yankees sho is
cuyus folks," he mused. "Fits' doy
cum down yar en tmane'tpate do nig
ger, den doy cum down en 'manelpnto
Me mule."
He Couldn't Oblige Her.
An American actor, who is old
enough not to consider himself n mati
nee idol by any means, was somewhat
pleased in n western hotel when a pret
ty girl stopped him In the corridor and
presented him with a rose without Bay
ing a word. Ho received a note the fol
lowing day reminding him of the inci
dent and asking hlin to send the giver
of the flower two sents nt tho theater
In which he was playing "as a me
mento of the occasion."
"My dear young lady," he wrote in
reply, "I should be glad to send yon
the seats you ask for; but. on consulta
tion with the manager of the theater,
I have been informed thnt the scats
are all fastened down and that he Is
opposed to having them sent away as
Bouvenlrs." Ladies' Ilome Journal.
Helped the Mayor Out. I
An imposing cemetery was about to !
be opened In a western town. The
mayor, who had charge of the laying
out of the grounds, was pnzzled for
an appropriate inscription to put over
the gate. Hiding along In bis automo
bile one day, lie was cogitating over
different holy texts, so he explained
his difficulty to his chauffeur. "What
.would you suggest?" he asked.
"We have come to stay," was the
prompt reply.
Where She Should Live.
"What under the sun," asked a fa
ther of his daughter who wanted her
to make a match with a young man
who.-e only qualification was the pos
session of a goodly fortune "what
earthly objection can you possibly find
to Mr. Spriggins?"
"He has habits." replied the daugh
ter, "which 1 detest! When I marry I
want a husband who does not smoke,
chew, drink, swear, belong to club3,
play cards, stay out late or go motor
ing by himself."
The father looked at his daughter
for a moment or two in silence and
then sold:
"My child, ypu ere but a stranger
here; heaven la your home."
One of Whittier's Admirer.
An admirer of Whittier's works was
granted au interview and talked in
cessantly for over an hour. In speak
ing of the patiently endured Infliction
to a friend the poet paused for a mo
ment and then added, with the sug
gestion of a smile, "And all the time
he called me 'Whitaker.' "
Jefferson Didn't Know.
The home of Joseph Jefferson at
Buzzards Bay was not far from the
Wareham road. v Some years ago when
certain ladies affected the bloomer cos
tume when riding bicycles Jefferson
came upon n lady in such a garb who
had evidently mistaken her road. As
Mr. Jefferson approached she asked:
"Will you kindly tell me If this Is
the way to Wareham?"
"Well," said Mr. Jefferson, 'Tin sure
I don't know; It's the first time I've
ever seen any."
No Time For Conundrum.
During the war a teamster with the
Cumberland army got stuck in the
mud and let fly a stream of profane
epithets. A chaplain passing at the
time was greatly shocked.
"My friend," said he, "do you know
Who died for sinners?""
"Damn your conundrums! Don't you
see I'm stuck In the mud?"
The Educated Flea.
It was at a banquet. A rule had
been agreed upon to the effect that
every person called upon fbr a toast
must respond with speech, song or
story. , As a last number on the Im
provised programme, a retiring sort
of chap was called upon to do his
fart.
"I I can't make a sp-speeeh," ho
stammered, "b-bnt I heard that fleas
could be trained to do tricks, and
some time o;n I tried to train one:
Would you care to see him?"
A place was cleared off In the center
of the snowy table-doth, and In tho
middle the owner set the small pillbox
he had takt.-u from his vest pocket
Removing the lid of the box
trainer called out:
."Jump out. Henry!"
out.
"Play dead, Henry!"
dead to perfection.
Ilenry jumped
Henry played
"Lie down and roll over,
Henry did so.
"Jump backward, Henry!'
obeyed.
Henry !"
' Henry
"Jump forward, Henry!" Henry
Jumped forward with such enthusiasm
that he landed upon one of the ladies.
Quite a search was necessary before
Henry could be recovered from the
lady's clothing, but finally the black'
nilte was retaken and set In his ac
customed place.
"Jump through there, Henry!" Hen
ry didn't move. -.
"Henry, I say. Jump through there!" :
Still nothing doing.
"Henry. Jump through there, I tell
you!" Still the most abandoned dis-,
obedience.- '
The flea trainer bent low above his
pet and looked at him a moment In
tently. Then straightening up, with
a look of relief on 1 iTs face ho said to
the woman from whom the flea had
been taken: I
"I bog your pardon, madam, but
that's not my Henry." LIppIncott's.
Jenny's Problem. !
A little girl stood at her mother's
knee and from the expression of her
face was evidently evolving some knot
ty problem. 1
"What Is It, Jenny?" asked the
mother. ;
"Mamma," said the child seriously,
"if 1 grow up and marry, shall I have
a husband like papa?"
"Yes, dear, 1 hope so." j
There was a long pause. Then tho
youngster asked:
"And If I don't marry, phall I grow
up to be like Aunt Susan?" ,
"1 hope so." '
Then the little girl put her hands to
her head and said In a tone of despair,
"Well, I am in a fix!"
Wanted to Be Obliging. ,
A lady visitor, wishing to be polite
to the little son of her host at table,
said:
"What a pretty dimple you have,
Benny!" j
"Yon think that's a pretty dimple?"
said the boy. "Mamma, can I show
tho lady the one on my stomach?"
Ladles' Home Journal.
Detailed For Baptism. !
At the beginning of the civil war 1
Colonel Brown and Colonel Smith were
raising regiments in Wisconsin. One
day Colonel Smith's chaplain paid a
visit to Colonel Brown. On leaving he
stated that the cause of religion was
prospering In Colonel Smith's regiment;
that no longer ago than the last Sab-.
bath day he baptized ten of Colonel ,
Smith's men. t j
"Sergeant major," exclaimed Colo
nel Brown, "make a detail of fifteen
men to go and be baptized, I'll be
blamed if I allow Colonel Smith's regi
ment to get ahead of mine In point of
religion."
Wanted a Permanent Grievance.
An Irish landlord returning home
after nn absence of several weeks saw
one of his tenants sitting on a stone
content. The moment thnt he greeted
him, however, the man scowled and
began abusing him.
"Why. what's the matter. Pat?"
"Matter enough' when your stheward
is afther evicting me, bad luck to
him!"
"Evh-ted you! What for?"
"The ou Id liar pretlnded me cabin
wanted repairing, and as 01 wouldn't
let him in, shure. he put me out."
"Never mind. Tat. I hear the cottage
you have always wanted is vacant, and
I'll let you have that at the same
rent."
"No, thanking your honor, I couldn't
think of it."
"Hut why not? What Is to hinder
you?"
"No, your honor; Ol'd rather have nie
grievance."
How She G?t In.
A lady accosted n little girl who was
entering one of the fashionable New
York flats where she knew the rules
were exceedingly strict aud, after some
little conversation, said:
"How does it come that you live In
these flats? I thought they would not
take In children. How did you get
in?"
"Why," replied the child, "I was
liorned in."
Not Needed In His Business.
An Irish clergyman wandering over
the fields one quiet Sunday afternoon
saw a young fellow well known to him
by reputation, accompanied by a fierce
looking bull terrier. He was evidently
engaged lu the reprehensible sport of
"ratting." The clergyman, observing
the ragged appearance of the man.
thought to accomplish good in a
round-
about way.
"George Cullen," said he, "I am
afraid times are hard with you. Now,
If you would mend your ways you
could mend your clothes. That dog is
probably worth something. Sell him,
and you could buy a good pig, which,
fattened, would be far more valuable."
"An" wouldn't I look fine goln' rattln'
wl a pig." .
"A Devil of a Show."
A Massachusetts town recently In
Utalled a trolley system, redestrians
among the visiting rural population
still come to n standstill when the
cars go by.
One countryman was watching the
other day as a trolley car, with a
croud on board, whirled up the hill
i.n 1 ih'.s'ie 1 by. Ko nske 1 a bystander
where it came from.
"D.'wn by the depot." was the reply.
"(;''s!:eiv:iiiv. Uiev mils' hev give her
a iie il .!' a Mir.v:" he exc'aiiuc 1.
the 111 I 1 1 irl&4 TTmri-'
How Much Could You Get
For Your Farm?
You nre a farmer. You live near this town. You own land.
Let us say that you own more than you need :iud would like to sell
a hundred acres.
How much could you get per acre?
Land values have riseu lately. But has the value of your land
risen ns you think it should?
Your land Is good land. You think it is worth considerably
more than anybody has offered you. Well, h-i us see.
A man buying farm land naturally prefers to locate near a
thriving, up to date town, lie wants good home markets for bis
crops. He wants goou
schools.
Let us say your land is
three miles from town. A
farm that looks very much
like yours is three miles
from n town twice as big
and twice as prosperous
as this town.
If you were goiug to
buy a farm for your own
occupancy, wouldn't you
pay a whole lot more for
land near the town that i.s
twice :is large and twice
as lively?
Of courso you would.
It would be g)od business.
Now, what makes a
town big and bustling?
Money. Money In circula
tion. Not in circulation in
Chicago, for instance, but
right In the town that
wants to grow.
How much money have
you sent to the big Mail
Order houses in the city
the past ten years? How
much have your neigh
bors sent? How much
have all of you together
put out of circulation
here at home?
It is probably beyond
calculation. If all that money had been s
town, isn't it reasonable to assume thai
grown more than it has grown?
Wouldn't this town be a liitigor nml lietlor town?
Wouldn't it have more stores to Luy your product;
Wouldn't it liavc more public improvements to make
it more attractive to outsiders who mijrht come here to live,
to go into business, or buy your surplus land at a good
figure ?
TO TRADE AT HOME MEANS TO HELP THE TOWN
AND THE NEIGHBORHOOD. TO HELP THE TOWN AND
THE NEIGHBORHOOD MEANS TO HELP YOURSELF.
TTTttttl'TTTTTTTTTTTTTI
!1 CAST1LIAN BRAVADO
i
i
Revolting Scene Pictured by
Spanish Novelist.
NERVE CF THE HAUGHTY DON
.
Striking Description of the Daring and
Courage Displayed by the Old Gen
eral Who Would Not Permit an Eng
lishman to Outdo Him.
! The realistic Spanish novelist
. Valdcs. In one of his most popular
i stories ("Sister San Supllce," trans
1 lated by Nathan Haskell Iole) gives
a description of a retired Spanish gen
j eral's afternoon out which will illu
i minate many chlvalric Incidents In
'. Spanish life and aptly l.lustratcs the
I reckless daring and courage of which
the average haughty don Is liberally
possessed. Tho scene is a sort of pic
nic grounds In the outskirts of Seville:
i "Meantime the animation had been
on tho increase among the ruffians.
I The period of unmannerly action had
! come. One of them climbed upon a
table to make a speech, and then the
I others, by way of applause, threw
I sherry and manzanlllu in his face,
j Another was trying to lift with his
i teeth n companlou whom drunkenness
hail stretched nut on the floor. He did
not succeed. He merely tore his sack
coat. Sllll others were committing
absurd and extravagant notions, mak
ing a great noise and uproar.
"The count remained grave and
silent, (lrluking one glass of sherry
after another, lint his eyes were no
longer, ns usual, incomprehensible and
unfathomable, like those of a man tired
of life. Though be did not speak or
move about he seemed a different
man.
"The Englishman had taken o!T his
jacket and waistcoat and, rolling up
1 "u'1'1 sleeves, was exhibiting his
bleeps, which were really powertul,
and trying to break empty bottles ou
his arm.- Once blood had come, but he
went ou breaking the bottles without
paying any attention to It. Then he
asked the waiter to bring a bottle of
rum nud a large glass. He filled this
to the brim with the liquor, and then
slowly, without moving n muscle or
even winking. 4ie drained it to the bot
tom. Then he sat down at the table
opposite the count and said solemnly
" 'You can't do that.'
"A Hash of fury gleamed through
the harebrained nobleman's eyes, but
he succeeded In restraining himself,
and. turning the rest of the bottlo into
tho gliirs.'he calmly ordered tho wait
er to bring him some i epper. He
throw In a pinch of it. th 'ii threw Into
it his cigar i:s!;pi heaped up bol'tre
hi ;i c.ud. v. il!:':it s.it:ig a word, with
the : ;r:.e t co.'nl'ul. i onl.'V.iptn.nis smile,
i'.:-;.'".! 1 i!: n'.,- i and. n . coniciil with
I1.::!, i il '.: l;i pie. -os. Wo raw his lips
CSt- ,
( : ;
J
i nl in your own home
:!iv.' town would have
spotted with blood. The company re
ceived with oles and shouts of tri
umph this proof of an unconquerable
Itomach, in which It seemed as though
the national honor were concerned.
"Our neighbors In the other booths
must have reached the same happy
grade of temperature, for nothing was
heard but extravagant shouts, the
crashing of glasses, coarse laughter
nnd swearing.
"The count was not yet satisfied
with his victory over the Englishman.
While he was swallowing with appar
ent calmness the glasses of liquor
which were offered to him he did not I
cease to devour him with ills eyes,
carried away by a dull madness, which
soon broke out. His eyes, which were
the only part of his Impassive face
that moved, gleamed more and more
ferociously, like those of a madman
when a straitjaoket has been put on
hi'ii. The Englishman continued to
l-nist of his strength. He was now
thoroughly Intoxicated nnd talking im
pudently enough to the others, who
wire not so drunk.
'"So you are very valiant, are you?'
asked the count, still smiling disdain
fully. " "More than yon.' retorted the Eng
lishman. "Don Jcnaro started t spring at him,
but the others restrained him. Soon
calming himself, he said:
" 'If you are so brave, why not put
your hand on the table?"
" 'What for?'
" 'To pin it down with mine.'
"The Englishman without an in
trant's hesitation stretched out his
huge, brawny hand. The count took
out of his po-Uct a damaskeened dag
ger and laid bis delicate, gentlemanly
baud the Englishman's, and with
out ' . ia'l'iii ml with a ferocious
grip I v ...i cd the poi'.t with the other
mid i.r ive i: throt'gh both into the ta
1 le.
"Tho w.)!n n tittered a cry of terror.
All of us Men ran to their assistance.
A few left t!:e place in search of help.
In an instant our booth was filled with
hloqd. Fro::! the wounds great drops
of blood streamed, staining the hand
kerch'efs which we applied to them.
"A i!r"tor who happened to be among
the bystanders dressed the wounds
provisionally with tho few means at
his disposal. The count smiled while
they were dressing his hand. The
Englishman was as sick as n horse,
and soon the count was the same, and
both v.-oro ti'kcn to such rooms as the
atiA,t ti nVr and went
to bed. Every one left, commenting
on the barbarism of the deed."
Hit Harder.
"Woman is considered the weaker
vessel." she remarked, "and yet"
"Well'
"A:'.d
the of!;v
r.e !!
be Mini .
she hesitated.
:'ied. "man Is
" Kxi hango.
If thou In goids
11 itrf
ii ....
(Prickly - Ash, Poke Boot
Physician ondurm P. P.P.mi splcn- yoa will regain flesh aid strength,
did combination, and proscribe it with BBpB Wasteof energy and all disease resulting
great aatlnfaction for the curea of all &UI from overtaxing the system are rured by
forms and stages of Primary, Secondary the use of F. P. P.
and Tertiary Syphilis. Syphilitic Khou- 1 Lilies whose syatomsarc poisoned and
mstism. 8t-rofulous Ulcers and Bonis, BB whoeebloodisinanlmporeoonditiondue
Olaadular Swellings, I;hiumatim, KiJ- to menstrual irregularities are peculiarly
Doy Complaints, old Chronic Ulcers that B,11 benefited by the wonderful tonio and
SYPHILIS SsCROFOEa
hTeri.Ud all treatment. Catarrh, Skin H blood prop. f P. P. P..
DUeaacs. Eczema, Chronic Female jT Prickly Ash, Poke Boot and Potassium.
Complaints. Mercurial Poison. Totter, Bold by all DruKKieU.
ScaldhMd, etc., etc. f '
P. P. P. i, powerful tonio and an WJ F. V. LIPPMAN
excellent appitizcr, building op the Js-- pro riotor
system rapidly. If you are weak and sisasssl
feeble, and feel badly try P. P. P., and Savannah, Ca.
BHEURHATDSi.
(ill A 1 R v 4 n. T
, 1 Till i t t$
Evan
1 la-
Fo
In Art Si
Homo
is a 8O0 thing, healing balm containing
no drugs having a narcotic effect It
RELIEVES
quickly and soothes the congested
membranes and thoroughly heals and
cleanses. Valuable not only for
CATARRH
but relieves colds, throat troubles,
hay fever, 'stopped-up" nose, etc,
"Wo Guarantee Satisfaction.
Buy a so cent tube of Nosena from
asijeboi;o in;i:t; co.,
Wood's Grass
Clover Seeds.
Best Qualities Obtainable and
of Tested Germination.
Fall is the best time for sowing.
Yon rest and improve your land,
and rest yourself, by putting fields
down in permanent grasses and
clovers.
Write for Wood's Descriptive
Fall Catalogue, telling best kinds
to sow, quantities to sow per acre,
and giving full information about
all seeds for fall planting, both for
the
Farm and Garden.
Catalogue mailed free oa request.
T. W. WOOD & SONS,
Seedsmen, - Richmond, Va.
Tha Ltriast Seed House la The South.
OP
AY. R. XISAJL,
PHOTOGRAPHER
AND
JtWElER
Randleman, N. C.
CAPUDINE
CURES '..i".7'
sr s tmmit.'H. .hi ili'i. t
INDIGESTION and ;
ACIDITY II t: ll II l.N AIM) hy
ri'iuovtug the cuust?. 10 cunts.
:-,:c,l. I
;! loc,
it
3E33
E3
and Potassium.)
-ph
been
I by :
cent visit to tho Northern M;ui:j
Aiuny Beautiful Tiling
jv
i a .-iK'S, n-.i.i.'i;i'iv,
Ikt! I'ciin I'-uilc?'.
Cut Cls, tie.
Au Inspection of Our Line
is sutf to i-leate.
We make buy i rip: er.fy ar.d pleasant
for the prospective housewife.
Come and be convinced,
PEOPLES' HOUSE
FURNISHING CO.
We prepay freight to ary print en the
A. & A. on rurchufs tf !)25 cr ctr.
QUICK REPAIR.
SKILLED WORKMANSHIP.
This is the watchword of
N. MELTON,
T5he
RANDLEMAN JEWELER
I
I Your watch needs repairing,
Your sewinu machine runs hard,
Your clock can't be depended on.
I These will be made as good as
new if sent to me for repair.
1 pay express or registered
mail charges one way.
N. MELTON,
Randolph Hdw. Store Bldg.,
Randleman, N. O.
!
STOP A'l THE
New Princess
HOTEL
WHEN AT
ATLANTIC CITY
ITS. 'A J H-t rivi KM T! rti
s.itth r,ir..liii;i Ave . Sim fivt from IVhCIi
T!i. I'rini'is He!, ! is m-wly tunrsh-
iaie. iumI p
mxlcrn rrtj'iiMt
ronvi'ii-
romt'nrt i'i li t pu
nml iirivil ci v ,,f the
I Clllll l-XIl lllli il to tl
st.
nil
i-m.lPE'
i it u
A i lim He
RUUMtS.
AllH'l icall li
A BOOKl.KT v
upon
il Kumi'iMiu riuii.
ill he Kindly furnished
Mppliealiou.
Hi! I mm S12.S to $36.00
inu in liH-utiiin ol the
n r iiiiiiriiuitioii U'ldrvMi
Pal.
Ku
CROW ELL i COLLIER.
TIIK Pit INt'KKSI HUTKI.,
Atlantic Itj, K.J.
mi
A D M 1 X I ST UATt Mt'SNOTI CE.
Iliiv'rg lii'iilifn d its mUiiitiisinitur of the
, omhic i I W. A. Hunch, ili'conxi il, tin's is
to notify till pcri-m; having vluitiis against
. Miid I'M ite t-.i pre-ei t ll i in to the under-
cl ,lh
,. I let,
ile.l in
nille.i.
.1, r.r U-fci
IT tl.trt l.li
tin- iirst
will lie
All p-r-ise
make
I, r UK'S,
mr nl'liii
i -Jiii o t i!l pi
l'.'l.T.
W. . llrMII.
Aihinii-lnit