The
Scrap Book
Why Wo Can 8it.
A Huston Kohoolboy nave tho follow
ing definition of tho wpluo: "The splue
la a hniK bone rencliiiitf from the skull
fj the heels. It has a hinge ia the
fcifilille, bo that you euti sit down; oth
erwise you wouM have to sit staiul
Ins" the r.mns axd ukks.
I think tho bi'es. tho bk-Ksvd bue.
Are lift tor, wiser tar thun wc.
Tl.e very wild birds In tho trees
Aro wiser, fnr. It seems to mo.
For love und Hunt nn. I sun unit iiir
Are theirs and nut a bit of care.
What bird makes claim to sll Cod's tree?
What bee niukes claim to ull (Soil's (low
ers'' Behold their perfect harmonies.
Their common board, the common hours!
Say, why should man be less than these,
The happy birds, tho hoarding be. s?
Jouijutn Miller.
pop borrowed two Jacks from the track'
men and jacked her up out of there
und carried her home on wheels."
"What'd he do with It?" insrsUted
the new man.
"Suy, that old lollypop must've been
u Yuuk. Nobody else could have fig
ured it out. The ground on his place
Is hard, and he needed some more
feii.-e, so he rale'lated 'twould le easier
uud cheaper lo saw that old well up
Into postholes than 'twould be to dig
Vtu."
Thereafter the new man bit more on
his food and less on the conversation.
Kvery body's.
Presence of Mind.
One of Mrs. Hamilton Fish's rules
when Ii t husband was secretary of
stale in CrniU's cabinet was lo return
every call sli" received. Her husband
was i-onllnually holding public recep
tions, and many women would conio
who had no doMiv i hat Mrs. l-'ish
hhould call upon them.
'.mm attended a Visit re
r card and a little later
Seven Hens Cannot Lay One Egg.
Ii.iulel Webster when he was secre
tary of stale was one day reading at
a cabinet mooting a draft of a message
hi- had written for the president to
transmit to congress. He was con
stantly Interrupted by one of the mem
bers with suggestions until, losing pa
tience, be turned to him mid said:
"Sir, Jon tnlitht as well expect seven
hens to lay one eg as seven men to
construct one message."
He Tipped Them All.
A New Yorker was shown to a room
in a hoiel it. I'.russels. where he found
twenty candies stuck in a chandelier.
lark, the attendant lighted
ill the guest put them out
MAN TORTURED FOR 33 TEARS
As it w:
them
::!:io.i.:i'c ;
In bis
lie
Hue such w.
rep! ion. left h
was d'i!
i.v. bow i
'Twenty
or. he
andlcs.
honor...! by a call
Vish.
It was a bcauiifitl. in;l
The l'Mi e.p.i;..-!-..'. all a -g!
wintry sunshine, da-hed d '
row s'reet il'ul liabc l be!',
man's lit;,. house w a i
Rle of silver . bains. The I'..
ed from the box an 1 opened the car
riage door, and Mrs. Visit descended.
The woman of the house was kneel
ing on the sidewalk beside a bucket of
hot water, wi'h a scrubbing brush in
0110 hand and a cake (if soap in the
idhcr. She was scrubbing the front
steps.
' Heading gra ioit.-ly
Fish asked politely.
Robinson at hotneV"
Ami Mrs. II. -my K.d
"No. muni, she ain't."
scrubbing. -I.ippinct t's.
from Mr
a : torn. .01
tier i:i tl:
:n-h al jiii
atmau leii'-
over her. Mrs.
"Is Mrs. Henry
.d.insou replied.
" and went on
.1 ba. k to 1:
cl 1!
d tl,
.t ,.. k.
his 0:0
.lies one t,
a b.
i 11. 1 di
h as I
monsieur,
an and took
cm in a bit
m into his
at. is drawn u;
hail in the Iairo
iu and ready for
lien he drew oat
tfibuted Ihe can
' passed out.
fullered train Disease of the Hkln, Hut
I'eiud Cure t Last.
A story wntttu in the own words
of t he sufferer has just come from
i Covington, O., which has ciutel a
nit; pt i r among specialists tinu ihose
.uflVring from Eczema and other
forms of skin diseases. George
Klainnici, of that city, an old and
honored lesideti , suffered from .he
zcuu for S3 years before lie was able
to liud a cure and was then sated
from further mfftring bv I). I). I).
I'rcscnjuion. Here is what he 6ays
ibout 11 :
"1 luul Kcenia for 3:1 years and
10 bottles of P. D D. Inscription
completely cured me. 1 know that
.ins sounds strange. I can hardly
iclicvcit myself but it is the gospel
truth. As soon as I found out what
1. l. I. would do I huiiied tip to
f 111 v best friends. Mr. Mi 11 man and
Mr. Hank, bi th of whom had Ecze.
uu. Moth of them are nearly cured
and Mr. Kank lias used ulv 8evn
otilcs. It is a wonderful remedy."
!. D 1. Prescription, a liquid
n inolv w hich gets right at the loots
f such il muscs as Kczc'i: 1. psonai--
h. elc. It
the skit,
kills t lu
es fall off,
idle.
s. .-ait 1 Ileum, barbers' i
doctors the skin whe
ds to 1 e .b'ctoi't d.
e-. 1 ins i.'ui ti c itching si
caV'i-'' 1 he ek:il litieuili
d II.
per
are very superior can
you. 1 iaid pi .outs a;.
- I. a. lies' 1 Imiho Journal
me, laadata.
. Willi
They
v know that this r. 1: dy is ab--n'liteiv
icliabl- and ' : at it has
cnfi 1! .a . 1 1 1 .-1 am! the ..:ients np
pi r.r 10 be 1 -'.1 r. il forever Come in
tp 'I let i s ti e y 011 u ouiilet (di
:.et 1 j. ! alnii g and oth- nccessaiv
il :: ., if imi are a si ,T rer fioin
ski'.l liiscase. -.-V. A. Uv .'KKWOOp.
l'.atiii'f 111 in, N.C., 1 r m. s'.
Outwitting Her Lawyer.
Mi;:, there ar -ca
rf IS
t t:
Her Positron.
An mipiicant for teacher in a coun
try school was asked, "What is your
position with regard to the whipping
of children?"
"My usual position is on a chair,
with the child held firmly across my
knees, face downward," was the reply.
st.il.' said Mrs
"I k'aov. of one
1 1 . i 1 1 . - in Virginia
pauy for damag.
diet for .s;.i..i.iiii.
I lie
occa-ioiis when a
hief betieii.-iary of a
SlouewaM .lacUs.ni.
istance. A friend o!'
sued a railroad emu-
and secured a ver-vhi.-h
was paid, and
A Noisy Eater,
Ex-Senator William E. I'handUT has 1
an admirer lu Now Hampshire who i
has ideas on how the government !
should be conducted and writes Mr.
Chandler about them at great length. !
After Chandler was defeated for tho 1
senate and In-fore he was appointed
president of the Spanish claims com-
mission the friend wrote, condoling ,
with the senator.
He said It was a shame that the na
tion and New Hampshire, should be de
prived of the services of so able a man
as Mr. Chandler and closed with this
prophecy: "Nevertheless. I do not think
republics are ungrateful. I am con
fident that your groat merits w ill again
lie recognized and that at no late date
we shall hear of ymi feeding again at
the public crib "
bole anioiint Is now In bank sub
ject to her order. Her counsel didn't
get a penny of It."
"I low was that?"
"She found the only way of outwit
ting him she married the lawyer."
Bible Authority For It. j
Mr. Hundiett, at one time a mer- !
chant in tlte town of Newcastle, Me..!
Instructed his clerks to strictly follow
the precepts of the ltible In all of their j
dealings.
obituary.
Mi-. I ; ' 1 . ' . a. .life of A-: . Inn Crave
and 1 n;.i -I r of Mr Mi Klias
M n.-i- I. th Ai.-;.-t ISM in : .4 n-I iter
sli v. ..i.i-. I .iii.l joh the rhimh
Mh. a -I . ;i- .it... in ! I )rara ol.l :. I has li veil a
i !.!--!. ..: a .a . --ii.- I.a.l Ik i . ..irrio.l alRUlt
."..: 1. hv.- liir.-e little to iiewr
V:- a in.-!'- I.oe Hit bin wiviee a
..i, a l .1 A. Le.lb r. iiml her
!....; u.i-lii.llo r. -t ai Fair I.- . ei-n.etery-Mm)
"..iiit. w. -re !an' l mi In - nr by kiml
tin u-!- . ii lovng reii.i-iut.raiKV. V - .ravts was
a f".i.i tii-mlil...! ;ia. vie will : - her very
ma. li at .-liii i .-li mil in our 1 .a--. May the
Ini-l iC.i.l a'.J Ho-i parent, brot .. an-l fbters
look lo U sus (or comfort, for she . ..lily rtit,l
the river ol .1. alh, hii h we ; ivo to cniss.
AnJ at the mil may ue he prei'ii : for the Miin-
MISVK sl t'AHT.
Iluliiliiy Knti'i'talnmriti.
re yon going to gi?e a party for
votit children, or for vmir friends
One day a lady came In to buy a 0f j,nir 0v n age during !!ie Christ
piece of dress giMsls. and one of the m, hnlidavs'' l)n nn .nt m.
ideas which no one has had a charce
to trv bcfor? Get the December
All the Same to Him.
One of a party of gentlemen left his
corner seat in an already crowded rail
way car to iro in search of something
to eat, lea iug a rug to reserve Ids
place. On returning be found that, in
Hpite of the rug and the protests of his
fellow passengers, the seat bad been
usurped by a woman clad l:i handsome
clothes. With Hashing o.'.vs s.,. turned
upon him:
"lo you know, sir. that I am one of
the directors' w i v es?"
"Madam." be replied, "wore yuii the
director's only wife I should si ill protest."-
Ladies' Homo Journal.
clerks spent a great deal of time show
ing her various cloths, which she said
weren't L'oi.,1 ,.li,.il.'l. Tl... al.l
he had a better piece In the roar of i " tuber of t'1" I !' Wotntn's
filestore. He showed her this piece. ! Magazine and nad "Mrs. Santa
which she had already seen, but told -Clans at llofiie," ami "Christmas
her it was much tiner and worth ."0 r'rollCS for the Yoillii:tlT8." Send
cents a yard more. She said that she , your friends one of the original lb
could readily see Unit it was better ; vitations illustrated it. an artich
and made her purchase. - t Ins anbiect and r.e.L-e tbp rT.ilr
complete We pnhli-'n this month
v ords tuid tiiiioic for a charmini;
Christmas carol which the children
c.n leat ii, as wdl as f uir programs
I: for amateur musical " tertainment
"Good Iliuisrkeepino" is full f
K'miJ recipes, nut only for the daint v
ilungs stub as llmstmas cukes,
sweetmeats and pnddliigs, but tie
method of coking stc.iK and fish on
a woi deli p'aiik a method 11 't
known to Miiinv housewives is n!.-t
liscnss.d. ".Varketii.- for Small
Families" .vi!l help in those who
have to' make the tn-st of a small income.
Mr. Kiuid.ett. who had seen the
transaction, censured the clerk, who
replied that he could refer to the lilble
to justify his action.
"Why how is that?"
"Well, she was a stranger, and I t
her In."
The
'I lie -o !,..
lit t'le Ii.
Moines.
f it.- know u
for bis inei,
"Wei:. I'l
last
Mill
o Effect.
I-'! been a brilliant company
::.e of a sociely leader in 1 ies
la., a w oaian whose husban 1
a ii I oticr for Ids wealth than
aei.tal attainments.
is." s'ae sail after tho
r was g 'ii.'. "it was u com-i-s.s,
w asn't it ?"
observed Traiu is.
HI notice I'l-of
or r.illing-
What She Was Like.
'Ho toil mo what Mrs. Tevvler Is
like." she asked of her husband.
"Well, she's a woman of sixty who
looks fifty, thinks she is forty, dresses
like thirty and acts like twenty."
"iiid
toll?"
"The man with the bandage around
his k?"
"Yes. What an astonishing vocabu
lary he lia. l"
"I'loiii Ilia v. av he hell his head 1
'.bought it was a carbuncle." I.lppin-cott's.
A Nice Distinction.
"I fear," said a country curate to his
flock, "when I explained to you In my
last charity sermon that philanthropy
was the love of our species you must
have understood me to say 'specie,'
which may account for the smallness
of the collection. You will prove, 1
hope, by your present contribution that
you are no longer laboring under the
same mistake."
Unique Poet Holes.
The foreman and his crew of bridge
men were striving hard to make an
Impression on the select board provid
ed by Mrs. Iiooney at her Arkansas
eating establishment.
"The old man sure made a funny
der.l down at Tincy yesterday," ob
served the foreman, with n wink at the
man to his right.
"What'd he do?" asked the new man
at the other end of the table.
"Well, a year or so ago there used to
be n water tank there, but they took
down the tub and brought It up hereto
Cabin Creek. The well went dry and
tey covered it over. It was four or five
leet around, ninety feet deep and
plumb lu the right of way. Didn't
Know what to do with It until along
comes nn old lollypop yesterday nn;l
gives the old man t.'i for it."
".'he dollars for what':" asked the
lie' i. :
"'"I!" continued t'.e -i -.man. ig
nor " ''ie hilc.Tr.pli.iU. "(hat old loily
Long Name, Siiort Lived.
"l:i Huston there used to be a stam
mering college kept by Professor
Craves." says Ooveruor (iuild. "Next
door to this college was a tlower store.
Professor ; raves' method was to ask
each pupil what phrase he would like
to learn to say perfectly. Then the
professor would drill the pupil on that
one phrase or sentence, and when the
stammerer repeated It smoothly a cure
was pronoiince l One day a friend of
mine, who was alllieled with the stut
tering habit, decided to patronize the
prol'oi'sor. Hefnie ho went Into the
studio, howcer, ho stopped to look in
the (lower si ni" at some chrysanthe
mums. "'Now. my dear fellow," said Pro
fessor (iraves. Ms there anything par
ticular that yon would like to learn to
ray perfectly?"
" 'W-w-w-well. y-yes th-there Is. 1
sli-sli-should like t-t-to be able t-t-to
s-say cr-crys-crys-cr-crysanth th-the-m-in-muiii
before the darn th-thlng
f-fades!" "
Unkind.
Miss Folia I.a Folletie, daughter of
Senator La Toilette of Wisconsin, was
iii'ssing a collection plate one day
when she was waved away by a man
(;is!i:igablied for Lis wealth and par
simo::y. "Niching." he rail S;-n::iy; "I have
nil'!.::':: "
"Tale ro: :i ;!:ln:. then: this ?ollee.
tion is for (';: poor, you know."
Kennedy's
Laxative
Cough Syrup
Relieves Colds by working them out
cf the system through a copious and
healthy action of the bowels.
Rslieves coughs by cleansing the
mucous membranes of the throat, chest
and bronchial tubes.
"As pleasant t the Ust
s Maple Sugar"
Children Like It
For BACKACHE-WEAK KIDNEYS Try
DeWl'.fe Kldnsj and Bladdu Pjlls - Sure and Safi
I k4 60 YEARS'
V' - 'tf EXPERIENCE
3 j D
5
AnTnnpffnr1tnff ft nkplrh und doner! nt Inn mf
tpi'ckly mt-Tiniii Mir oiumnti free whether an
Itivpiiiimi in pnihnbi? Tuuetituble. Communion.
nnimrttrlctlyriHiiWenthtl. HANDBOOK onPstenli
St'iit fr. oiliest Hjciirv fur fiM-iirint ptetiii.
I'titt'tns taiifn t hrniiuh Munn A Co. receive
tprcuit notUet nil tumt chwrifp, in the
Scientific Jfmericam
A hanrtBonifly 1UiiMrBr1 wfkly. I.nreeflt clr
rnlntt.Mi .f any wnnftUc Journal. Ttiiia. a
vi ir: fnr rioiif h, fl. Btil4 ly ull newBdealers.
ftKxN Co.3ciaad"-- New York
Br.uiulj Oilicu. tl K Ht WafhiLKlon, D. C.
SO.LID
G OL D
i (
f
$2.50 Fountain Pen Offered Free
14 KARAT, SOLID COLD
To Every Reader of The Courier.
A Fountain Pen
I f K.
is .somethini' every one needs. You cannot well tfet alonjj
without cue.' We olTer you, practicallv tree, a 14 k, solid
ffold pen, fancy carved", hard rubber, air-tight barrel.
Your dealer would charge you at least 52. 50 tor this pen.
They come in a neat box, together with a glass tiller and
complete instructions lor immediate use. The pen is ful
ly guaranteed, and if not satisfactory will be replaced.
Special Offer
To any person who will send a club of twenty new
subscriptions to The Asheboro Courier, from now until
.Lin. Isi :u KV. each, remitting the total amount of 52.00
v e vi d the above desciihd F'ountam Pen free bv regis
tered mail, pi h.i .go prepaid. Remit bv monev ordor or
registered letter at our risk. The twenty trial
.lcnpr'iiN must be sent in at same time. Anv one cr.n
secure twelve n,w trial subscriptions at 10 cents
each ia les i!i;mi one hour's time.
SEKD L YOUR CLUB TO THE
Asheboro Courier,
Circulation Department,
Asheboro, N. C.
0 R Cl'X. rri-.li iit. W J AK.MKlKLu, V-Piw
W J AKMK1E1.Ii. Jr., Cushlpr.
The Bank of Randolph,
.A-slieTooro, IT. C
Capitul ami Surplus, $50,000 0(
Total A-w-tis,;vi.r '200,000.00
With iimpi.' ..i". t'xufrleiii'e and nroteetion
we illicit tin' ,.iimiics i if the haukintr miblin and
feel wife in wiymir v Hrt- irciiiii'il anil willing
to exteiiil to our rutniD T every fui'llity anil r
lommoilutioii coiixiNWiit with safe lianking.
D1RCCTOR.SI
HiiKh Harks, Sr.. W J ArmfleM.W V Wood. V b
Morrin, (' C Mi'Alt-ter, K M Ann field . lUCoi,
VN K kt'ddinK. B.-UJ Moltilt. TIiom J Hi'ildlliu, A W
K i'afiel, A M Kiinkiii, 1 hob H KediluiK. it F
AsburT. 1' J Cox.
S Brant, President J. H. Cole. Cashie
Ghe
Dciik of R.andlemaLn.
Randlemarv, N. C
o
Dr. Miles'
Anti-Pain PilU
Relieve Headache
Almost instantly and leave no bad effect.
They also relieve every other pain, Neural
gia, Rheumatic Pain, Sciatica, Backache,
Stomach ache, A.c;uc rains, TVius from In
jury, Hearing-down pains, Int!i;.rcstion, Diz
ziness, Nervousness and Sleeplessness.
per interest
cent ' Paid
On Time Deposits
Capital $12,000. Surplus, $5,000,
-MwrgraCT 1 'myj M I
160 SHARK :
Ml I
imm mm
P
Relieve
Pain Quickly
By taking one or two Dr. Mi'k.' An'i-l'-iin
Pills vvln-n yon feel an attack coi'iir. in.
Yon licit only avoid sulTcring. but the woa':
erim ir.lhu'Mi'e of prii-i tion the v-to'ii. If
tin vmiti. irritnlile ntul c:.K:',nt slfi-;i : i',c a
t:'!i!ct v.: re:iriiio or u l:en vo1' ,'i"." .! :.
Hp,
.a. S Mir. " .ner .sold
OF STOCK IN MT.
Alii APL-EORH-0RH4RDF
ORSLE.
At par, payable in
ftmr vers." $75.00
l-r aere will put an
Mt-elnrJ in bearing.
A; r ! c s are selling
i n year at from
,s20o.00 lo $300.00
per aere on the trees.
Address
JOHN A. YOUNG.
Gr orislicro Nurseries,
t'li oensboro, N. C.
F. ('. HOYLES. Cashier
3 Gre ensboro (-ommercial
Sivinffs Bank.
Crescent Furniture' Co.
MAKE
HOME
Reception Ghairs
In Mahogany. Reed
and Upholstered.
Pictures, Molding?,
Easels, Parlor Suits
3 and 5 pieces, Couches,
Bed Lounges,
Bed Room Suites i 10 up,
Odd Dressers, $ 4.50 up.
FURNISH
WITH
THE
LATEST
STYLES
In fact we keep almost everything usually kept in a first
class Fjrniture Store. You will do well to see us before
buy' Thanking you for past favors, we arp your friends
Ramseur,
N. C.
4