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VOL. III., NO. 23.
PINEHURST, N. C, APR. 6, 1900.
PRICE THREE CENTS.
A PORCINE DIALOGUE.
Said the pig in the pen to the pig outside,
"Look at my quarters! I point with pride
"To the snug little nest wherein I lie,
"And the oozy carpet that covers the sty.
"Pillowed in that 1 sleep content,
"Or root it over enjoying the scent.
"While you're half-famished, I'm full fed and
"I dine on the same that they do at the Holly
"Bread and meat and stuff in pans,
"Oranges, lemons, tomato cans,
"Pies and puddings and things of note,
"In truth a regular table d' hote.
"The only thing that makes rue fret
"Is losing the stuff that the buzzards get.
"Living thus I am up to the style,
"And have no use for the low and vile,
"And since you are only a tramp in want
"Be gone and cease my sty to haunt."
With a grunt of contempt came this reply :
"These elegant things are all in your eye;
"Living on garbage may be immense
"For pigs that are utterly lacking in sense;
"That never have known the wild delight
"Of roaming the woodu by day or night.
"Roots that are wholesome I dig from the sand,
"All things that grow by the streams 1 command,
"The succulent grass when it tarts in the spring
"Has juices the sweetest, and lit for a king.
"I want not your pity, foul thing of the sty !
"If either is in the Four Hundred, 'tis I.
"Breathing the odors of your vilj nest,
"To golfers and others a terrible pest,
"Is not the life I care to lead
"Such pigs must come of a worthless breed;
"Growing fat will not retard
"Your early transforming to pork and lard.
"Continue my friend to wallow in mire,
"But give me a residence, sweeter and drier.
"I must be going, I bid you good-bye,
"And leave you to revel alone in your sty;
"I'm off to the hillsides as fleet as a deer,
"'My heart's In the highlands, my home is not
"When my bacon is wanted, at last, they will find
"The fat streaks and lean, as they should be, com
bined, "And the gourmand at breakfast enjoying the
"Will call it delicious, and say I died game."
M. L. II .
MOCK TOWN MEETING.
Our Villagers Meet ami Transact Town
Itiisliie.s.s In (jJootl Old New England
Last Saturday morning our villagers
were .somewhat surprised to receive a
printed notice which read a. follows:
Warrant for Town Meeting, Sat
urday, March 31, 1900, at 8 O'clock
To Either of the Constables of the Town
of Pint hurst, Greeting :
You nre hereby directed to notify and
warn the inhabitants of the Town of
I'inehuriit, to meet, at the Town Hall in
said Pinehurst on Saturday, the 31st
day of March next, at 8 o'clock p. m.,
to act on the following articles, to wit.:
Article 1. To choose ;i Moderator to
preside in said meeting.
Art. 2. To elect by hand ballot for
the ensuing year a, Town Clerk, three
Selectmen, a Treasurer, one Overseer of
the Poor, one member of Town Hall
Committee, two members of School Com
mittee, and one Trustee of Cemetery,
also to choose all other necessary Town
Officers for t lie ensuing year.
Art. 3. To hear the reports of the sev
eral Town Oflicers and act thereon.
Art. 4. To raise such sums of money
as may lie necessary to defray town
expenses the ensuing vear and make
appropriations of the same, and act
Art. 5. To see what compensation the
Town will allow Firemen for the year
Art. 6. To see if the Town will accept
the list of names prepared by the Select
men to be placed in the jurv box, or act
Art. 7. To determine where within
the town the High School shall be kept
the ensuing year.
Art. 8. To see if the Town will raise
and appropriate monev for the main
tenance of a Police Force.
Art. 9. To see if the Town will appro
priate money for the maintenance of the
Pinehurst Brass Band.
Art. 10. To see if the Town will build
a schoolhouse in District No. 1, select a
site and make an appropriation therefor,
as recommended by the School Com
mittee. Art. 11. To see for what object the
Quite a number of our towns people
believed the call to be genuine, but those
familiar with the laws of the Old North
State knew that no such provision was
made for managing town a Hairs, and,
scenting fun in the air, determined to
attend. Accordingly at the appointed
hour a large crowd gathered in the hall.
The meeting was called to order at 8
o'clock by Mr. Benbow, who read the
warrant and called for the election of a
moderator. Mr. Allen T. Tread way was
then nominated and unanimously elected.
On taking the chair Mr. Treadway made
a very neat speech of acceptance, stating
that he probably owed his election, not
to the fact of his being possessed of a
superabundance of brains or as unaccom
plished parliamentarian, but lather that
he weighed two hundred pounds, more
or less, and as a weighty man would be
Jayi. from. CLiM P&$fmv-ti
Town will appropriate the Dog Fund.
Art. 12. To determine the pay of
if 13. To net on additions oramend-
ments to the by-laws which may be sub
mitted in tins meeting.
Air. U. To see what action the Town
will take on the petition of Virginia
n.i-p .iii.i one thousand other persons,
that women be given the right of suffrage
in town affairs.
Art. is. To transact anv other busi
ness that may legally come before the
And you are directed to serve this vvar
iiit i'v n.istiny in) an attested copy
thereof at the Post Ollice in the centre of
aid Town, and at the It. If. Depot, lloiiy
1111 IIWl liPiksliire Hotel, ten hours at
least before time of holding said meeting.
Hereof, fail not at your peril, and
..l-o Miia iPtiirn of this warrant, with
mi' (Initio's thereon, to the Town Clerk
it the time and place of meeting af ore-
Given under our hands this 30th day of
March, in the Year of Our hold, One
Thousand Nine Hundred.
(Si-ned) Perennial Evergreen,
Selectmen of Pinehurst.
Ladies especially invited to be present.
able to keep order by the use of force.
He also stated that parliamentary rules
were at a discount in that meeting, and
that he proposed to carry out the wishes
of his constituents and rule the meeting
That part of Article 2 relating to the
election of a town clerk was then taken
up, and Mr. Benbow was chosen to fill
Kev. H. B. Tobey, "of the subway of
Boston," then rose and called for Article
14 in precedence over all others, and
presented the petition of Virginia Dare
and 1000 others, that women lie given
the right to vote in town affairs. After
considerable discussion, in which Mr.
Tobey made a. lengthy plea in favor of
the petitioners and Messrs. W. A. Teele,
S. II. Smith and others opposed, the peti
tion was refused by a vote of 90 to 84.
Article 2 was then taken up again and
Messrs. Silas Stowe, Judge Bunnell and
F. T. Spinney were elected selectmen.
On the call for nominations for town
treasurer Mr. Tobey rose and in a lengthy
speech nominated himself for the office,
he stated that he was prepared to furnish
two $1000 confederate bonds as security
if elected. When the question was
brought to vote he was defeated by a
large majority, amid much laughter.
"Paddy Dwyer" then nominated himself,
but as lie could not prove that he had
been naturalized the nomination was
thrown out. Mr. .1. M. Hobinson was
then nominated and elected.
Then Dr. Abercrombie was elected
overseer of the poor, Mr. St. Clair on
town hall committee, and Messrs. Haw
ley and Kogers on school committee, and
Dr. Ilersey was made trustee of cemetery.
Messrs. Charles Baxter, M. F. Black,
H. McArdle, J. L. Pottle and Dr. Par
cels were selected to serve as a hog
Mesdames F. T. Spinney, Silas Stowe
and K. 1. Balch were then elected fence
viewers and instructed to perambulate
the town fence (which encloses nearly
503 acres) within forty-eight hours. It
was also voted to allow the ladies the use
of an automobile in the performance of
their duties, and they are now waiting
for the vehicle to arrive before inspecting
Mr. Tufts was then elected pound
keeper. The report of the selectmen was then
called for and Mr. Stowe asked that the
selectmen be excused, as the report was
not ready. This caused considerable dis
cussion and a motion was made to tine
the chairman $25 for neglect, but it was
laid on the table and the report accepted.
Reports of school and town hall
committees were read, discussed and
Article 4 was disposed of, and then Mr.
Tobey moved that the vote on the peti
tion of Virginia Dare and others be
reconsidered. This was done, after some
discussion, and the moderator ruled that
for the remainder of the evening the
ladies could vote on an equal footing
with the men.
Article 5 was then taken up and Dr.
Parcels made a speech in favor of the
firemen and moved that $100,000 be
appropriated as compensation for the fire
laddies for the next year, lie then
wanted to know who the firemen of the
town were; if the men who stirred up
the tire in the boilers at the hotels were
firemen; if the private citizen who got
up on cold winter mornings and made a
fire in the stove was a fireman; and,
referring to the remarks made by the
moderator, who said he intended to rule
the meeting by force, the doctor wanted
to know, should the presiding officer
have occasion to "tire" come one from
the hall, if he would be called a fireman,
The jury list was then submitted,
amended and adopted, and the question
of a location for the high school was dis
cussed. Smoky Hollow and the Iron
Spring were both suggested and it was
voted that the school be held at these
places on alternate weeks. This brought
forth a few remarks from Mr. Tobey,
who s id that the arrangement, reminded