Thursday, March 11, 1926
I Dinner Stories
'
"The street ear was crowded, and
•n old gentleman with a kindly
twinkle in hie ejle took five-year-old
Tommy on his, lap. "This will he
better than standing, won’t tit my
boy?" be; suggested.
"Yes,” Haid Tommy, rather reluc
tantly. for he had enjoyed lurching
about in the car. .
"But you want to \k> careful that
I don’t pick your pocket,” the old man
said, in a whisper. y
"Can’t,” Tom retorted, his voice
somewhat muffled. "As ,soon as I
saw you lookin’, at me I put my pen
ny in my mouth.” . ~
Hard-looker (to passing motorist)
—Hi, mister, I’m going your way!
Motorist —So r see, but I’ll get
these before you do.
“Do you think the accused would
steal a chicken?" the lawyer asked
Mose on' cross-examination.
“Kossui. Ah wouldn’t say ez he
would,” answered Mose, wriggling
uneasily on the chair. MBut, Ah
knows die —when dat man gits hun
gry fo’ chicken, dat man’s jes, nach
tVty boun’ to have chicken.”
Ifay—My dear, yon have made a
bdw'job of putting your paint on
thi«r morning.
Fny—Yes, honey. I’ll admit I’m
somewhat of an amateur—you see I
haven't been patting it • on as many
years as you have.
“Tommy.” said the teacher, “will
you point out Australia' to the class?”
Tommy did sq, .
“Who discovered Australia,
George T' asked the teacher.
“Tommy did,” was the reply.
Judge—Yon say the defendant
turned and whistled to the dog. What
followed? . ,
Intelligent Witness—The dog.
“I henr that Qawler has got a
$2,000 ear.”
i “How did he get the $2,000?”
“Oh, he hasn’t got that yet."
Mrs. Alden was proceeding through
the house with her new maid on a
tour of inspection. She halted -in die
pprner and, pointing to a cobweb,
said : "Have you seen this?"
“Yes. ma'am.” said the new maid.
That was there when I come—some
thing so do with your radio ain't |
t r
Protect Your Property
and Money
a agejjffij h * Marietta House Paints, is practi-
T % I caily guaranteed against the ravages of
jji sou! weafher by die Marietta Service
WRORA PAfif Certificate. No other paint manufac
turer offers you such a certificate. Ask
us about it today.
Concord Paint& Paper Company
342 N. Church Street ' ' Phone 10L
MARIKTTA PAINT STATION |
EVERETT TRUE BY CONDO
•Hello) am* TNts’
TAWC ACiOUT Voy MAKING, an miPoSAI
THAT THe QTY CCAP ANOTHCR
iOITO TKB OOT ’MY tg/AY *
(WHAT'S TH<S SeASIS
3UCH A -HUH ? pfp
p QH||
A ■ '
. •
Stingjest Person ,
New York Dajly Mirror.
L: *■»— " ■"•»»
The stijajlegJ person 1 know Is the
man who when he won at Wembly
Fair saw ■ * "hhtwiag gmchine" with
a poster on it saying : JfVut your penny
in the slot' and pea how hard you cun
blow.” .He put his penny in the slot
and commenced to blow. He was
found next morning, dead. Police in
vestigated and they found .beside the
machine.a postor which read: "Blow
to 500 and you get your pVpuy.’ back."
The stingiest person I know is a
mnn who has a wart on his neck and
uses it for s collar button to keep
from buying one.
The stingiest person I know is the
man who always sits in the back pews
In church so that he can keep his
money-the longest.
The stingiest person I know is the
man who tells his children to put their
quarters in the gas meter and makes
them believe it’s a bank.
The stingiest person I know is the
man who jumps over the fenee to keep
from weaving out the binges on the
gate.
■~r* . 1 -■ —<•
Co-operative Shipment of Poultry.
Morganton, March B.—(/P)—Tin
third co-operative oarlot shipment oft
poultry was made from Burke county
last week in ’which 125 farmers took
part. They brougfit in 5,986 pounds
of imultry for which they received
$1,351.27. reports County Agent It.
1.. Sloan The prices paid fop this
pou’try averaged five cents per pound
higher than local prices undggnve the
growers about s3(Ml'ilv extra money
over what they would Imre received
oh the local markets.
Mr. Sloan reports that as a result
of his efforts in this work, there is
more interest in poultry production
than ever before. "This is evidenced
by .new houses, the buying of baby
chicks and better feeding and man
agement of flocks.
On September 23. 1845. a number
of young men in New York City or
ganized t)u* Knickerbocker Club and
drew up the first code of playing rules
of baseball. The Knickerbocker dab
continued in existence for nearly
forty yeans.
San Francisco saw its first game
of baseball cn Washington's birthday
in 1860. _
Sol Room’s Willing to Accept Senate
Scat, and Prove Stars Right.
By CHARLES P. STEWART
NBA Service Writer
Washington. March 10.—Congress
man gol Boom lias been pretty chesty
ever since .Mme. Marcia, the well
known astrologer, notified him of his
coining promotion into the Senate.
Marcia had been a good bit wor
ried about the bill Sol has pending,
to put a crimp into the fortune tell
ing industry in the District of Co
lumbia.
But Sol isn't shooting at regular
scientists, like Marcia.
• * •
Sol’s'just after fakers, among whom
it seems, he doesn't class Marcia.
It was when he explained this to
her that she revealed to him what
the heavens had told her bearing on
his own political future.
They say that Senator Wndsworfi,
of Sol’s own state of New York, who
comes np this year for re-election, is
considerably upset over it. However,
the stars didn’t say positively that
Sol would get the very first vacancy.
» * *
At that, it wouldn’t be surprising
if Marcia had some suae-enough po
litical influence, though hardly with
the New York state voters.
She has read the stars for two
presidents’ wives.
Any cne with the ready aecess to
the White House that she had while
she was doping out the constellations
for these two “first ladies” is likely
to find an occasional chance tQ say a
good word for some 'people.
, If so, it would be up to the persons
she spoke for to feel grateful. They
don’t always, though.
Preserve the Home.
New York Mirror.
Bishop William T. Manning has
sounded the call for Catholics, Pro
testants and Jews to unite in .the
fight against easy divorce. 1
Every scund-miuded God-fearing
man imd woman in the country
shou d stand behind Bishop Man
ning in this move.
Quoting Bishop Manning: “To al
low men and women to live together
for' a time and ’ then with legal
sanction on trival and frivolous
■; rounds to separate anil form new
alliances ’is in effect practical poly
gamy.”
Bishop Maiming will receive the
hearty support of the Daily Mirror
in his campaign. This newspaper be-,
lieves the preservation of home life*
is morq important to the. nation than,
World courts, can! strikes or tiny
other problems.
'Afxfarer
?' Yes. you will look up
and congratulate yourself
for having installed our
lighting fixtures . They
really render a service off
two kinds. Primarily,
they furnish you with ef
ficient light, and they are
decorative also.
jJB “Fixtures of Character” %
Lfj W. J. HETHCGX L
13 Vi. Depot St. Phone 669 V
We keep at all
times a complete
assortment of East
man Kodaks and
accessories.
*7*o° Sale at —
Gibson Drug Store
(Authorized
Agents)
Extra Nice
Mountain Honey
3 Pounds Net Weight Jar
Only QtC r
It’s Fine * OC
Cabarrus cash gro
cery Co. ,
PHONE 571 W " s v
F* ,S.—J-Red Bliss and Cobbler
Seed Potatoes and Garden
Seed Y
THE CONCORD DAILY TRIBUNE
• — 1 1 I ' a
C Yiaff)-' <1
OUT OUR WAY BY WILLIAMS
AINTT
- jSwiUsi
. Fence. pekiols». . © 1826 BY IttA SEWfICC. IWC.
MOM’N POP BY TAYLOR
f LORETTA BEAfc Y / COME-COM 6 ( / OH >* EDMUMD MAD ONLV 9TAYCD V 'Y
YOU’RE MCfTEATING l( ~' T I LE / A\MAv I \*>Om.Dto’T WAVS SO MUCH To )
*-,°A'ntlNtfl EAr,NQ J) So PENSiVF r YOO LZ / TMlteig ME HAS LAVgD Thß y
|—» m SHOULD BE TB£ iST l v\IO(?LD AT MV FEET - A LUXURIOUS )
f 1 happiest <sirl \ HOMf - servants -a cAta of
/ \ IM THE - T«?tPS ABROAD -
’♦WAT’S sev PERPLEXING ) ( That'sYuST Yl r fHEM DEAR *F YOU W Y6S L Kuoui - SOT i'Y
A9OOT TRAT*’ if / / ’T- I DOM T \ LOVE CHICK THAT ]&> CAM T Fo«&fiT THAT
vWu uovß Fdmund / l p ° l? ] Should decide' "H-ie R'N<s heSoi)6ht
YY—VMHv. V I tOVE CHICK ' / , THINGS-YOU'LL I 'S THREE Tlfi\ES AS
' i a*ve me
Potpourri
FANCY DRY GOODS WOMEN’S WEAR
Let Us Insure the Life of Your
Baby Chicks
By Feeding Them Startina and
Baby Chic Chow
We have plenty on hand all the time. Also Chicken
Chowder and Hen Chow. Will give you more eggs.
Cash Feed Store
PHONE 122 SOUTH CHURCH ST.
Mr. Farmer! We Want Your Poultry.
la
A\ e pay cash and ouy almost anything; you raise on
n the farm. .We are the Largest Poultry Dealers in the city,
ir • The Poultry Market is still active at 20c per pound for
j)| hens, but we cannot longer guarantee prices.
; i:| Egg Market active at 25c per dozen.
jjt} Butter Market at 25c to 4(fc per pond, as to quality.
| Bring us your Cream. We pay ypu 36c per pound, net.
jj per Butter Fat.
J| C. H. BARRIER & CO.
DELCO LIGHT
5 t
Light Plants and Batteries
t Deep and Shallow Well Pumps for Direct'or Alter
jj nating current and Washing Machines for Direct or Al
ii ternating Current.
R. H. OWEN, Agent
C „_Phone 668 Concord, N. C.
| ROTTER BORING BAR
We I lave installed a Rotter , Hiring Bar which enables us to ro
il bor f . vcur motor without removing the block from the frame, thereby
= saving you practically one-third the cost of ordinary overhaul jobs.
We also have a Brake Lining Machine which thills and counter
S sings so that the rivets never come in contact with the brake drum, al
so riveting machine which uses S:>Hd copper lobular rivets. dust
give us a trial anti be convinced. •
“ RCSCO BRAKE LINING, FREST-O-LITE BATTERIES AND
ACCESSORIES
Auto Supply & Repair Co.
FA¥HITCKY WEEK
safrp@niages flabpQnlagd-
March 15th to 21st
't ou want the finest carriage you can find for your baby. We
'fler you the Whitney Coaches as the most beautiful carriages
n the world, and we have priced them with extreme modera
ion. For tvimfort, for beauty, for strength and long service
buy the Whitney Coach.
Let the Whitney Coach carry your baby safely and com
ovtahly over the smooth road to childhood.
Conte in and see them today—One of the largest stofcks ever
hown in Concord.
H. B. WILKINSON
Out of the High Rent District, Where Parking Space Is Plentiful
and time unlimited.
Concord Kannapolis, Mooresville China Grove
Hot Water
iflmn 1,1 ga hot water heater
j | is surely a friend in need and
Prj| ®r J a f r ' en d indeed of every cook
l\ ]K I » match and in a few minutes
;| i | B , | steaming hot water will run
K | ’'T -i from the faucet—enough sot
J '5 the dishes, for a badi, etc.
Pays for itself quickly.^
E.B. GRADY
PLUMBING AND HEATING DEALER
Office and Show Room 39 E. Corbin St. Office Phone 334 W T
PAGE SEVEN