I foesniay, May It, 1926
mr~ r- ■■ —-■ ——
Dinner Stories
"Don't yeti know who I am sir? I
n a representative of the people!”
“Well, wot of it?" asksd the other,
sttliug himself comfortably. “You
now wot we are? We ain’t nothin’
icond-fcaurt. We're the people them
‘lves.”
“Mother, this is the sxth time I've
*ked tile Lord to give Daddy * car.
)o you think I’m on the right wave
ength?”
What are youi' two highest ambi
ons?" 1
“Blondes nnd brunettes."
The Lady—They say drinking
lortens a mao’s life. '
The Gentleman —Yes, but he sees
vice as much in the same length of 1
me.
■i
Grandma—People don’t seem to ]
arry as young as they did when I
In girl, 1
randiiapper—No, old dear, but
do it oftenetl. s' i
’ll drive," remarked the wife, tie ,
climbed into the back seat.
ip—Yyou remind me of the wild
id—Ob-h-li, because I am str rest
ami unconquered?
10. Because you’re all wet and
make me sick.”
iticism will not help discourteous
‘rs. The help conies automatical
lien,.two of them meet at high ■
I on a narrow road.
1
rery auto has two speeds—Wlieu ]
top is looking and when he isn’t.
ten Jf it is a goo<l fieal of trouble, '
risfs usually can avoid same ad- 1
nal trouble by stopping aa soon as 1
ble after hitting a pedestrian,
besides, ordinary manners de
f mand that he stop; the pedestrian 1
nearly always does. <
\ • ,
"You have participated in many in- \
vestlgations?"
“Many." agred Senator Twebdle.
“Have you succeeded in coiling pub
lic attention to anything important?"
“Yes. To myself ns an investiga-
f tor.”
* Protect Your Property
and Yotir Money
bouse, when painted with
A Marietta House Paints, is practi*
caily guaranteed against the ravages of
foul weather by the Marietta Service
Certificate. No other paint manufao
< hirer offers you sneb a certificate. Ask
o- w- ~ 4 us. about it today.
Concord Paint& Paper Ccupany /
342 N. Church Street Phon* 16L
SERVICE STATION ‘
1 HZ 7~ 1 *
EVERETT TRUE § BY CONDO
/now UST6N ,To' siactss. M -1
I UAv<e- SvAio no: That is a aftofe-r, i
3l«pce WORT) ■■ ■. ====*—
<N-P EASY To r&B 1 MR. TRua,
LHvn?eeST-ANT?, I <-<£T Mts EXPLAIN
is it not f- * ths. ...■
4 W~ —r &’'%~ 2 - J z E=r— z .=-
-=■
<
p/AR %>t> N, (JfeT Me. CXPCA IN. THE
WORO "Nh* I*. COMPC?se.X> oe Ttvo LI=TTC:R.S
--—-
___ - ,
*on \s TOR ( . n
/our" mini y -
Embarrassing: Moments
New York Daily Mirror.
Returning Ttome the other night in
the street bar I had u box of face
powder in my pocket, which I had
bought for my wife. I had been sit
ting on the box and broke the cover.
When I pulled out my handkerchief I
pulled the open box of powder out
with it and spilled the powder on a
lady’s black silk dress.
It was noontime aud all the em
ployes had left the building except the
telephone operator. She was putting
on her coat when I entered. I ran
ont and held the door fast from the
outside. She tried hard to pull it
open, nnd suddenly the bell rang. As
I knew she should go to answer it, I
let go the door, but immediately took
hold again. This time I felt a hard
er puli on the door, which I.couid not
resist. When the door opened, my
boss came out looking very stern and
told me that it was the wrong time to
A White Plains. New York, man
,bad to get an official permit before
he could use a shotgun in hunting
squirrels that had invated his home.
. Melrose Flour
Liberty Self Rising
Flour
Why use Flbur that may
please you at some time, and
will not please you at other
times, and that too, when you
most want the very best.
Melrose is just the very best
at all times. -It has stood the
test —on this market for more
than twenty-five years.
Liberty Self-Rising is.-made
ready to bake. It’s Melrose in
quality.
Our price is no higher now
than any other brands.
CLINE & MOOSE
Phone 338
P. S. —We Deliver Quick Ev
erywhere.
I BY CHARLES P. STEWART
NEA Service writer
Washington, May 10.'—Senator
l Reed Smoot, of Utah, sprang a joke
: the other day.
1 It’s the talk of the whole Heuate.
Not that, aa a joke, it waa any
thing to write home about, but it was
| the first one, according to all the .best
‘ authorities, that that particular ’sen
’ ator ever perpetrated.
‘ He takes Jife seriously.
• He isn’t melancholy but he’s sol
-1 emji.
J He never laughs. Hb never smiles.
Sometimes he gets irritable, but nev
; ar,, except in this loi% recent in 7
stance, has he ever heen known to
, get funny.
I Smoot was making an appeal at
, the time for some new government
buildings in Washington. He point
ed out that a large part of the gov»
, eminent personnel in the capital is
, housed in what were intended, orig
r inally, aa temporary quarters, mostly
of pretty sketchy, war-time construc
tion and now in a sad state of dilapi
; dation. “It's an urgent necessity,”
he insisted, “to get these employes
out of the old shacks they have to
work in now. or I’m afraid they’ll fail
l down altogether.”
i _ “I)o you mean,” asked Senator
Norris facetiously “that you’re afraid
the employes will fall down or that
the buildings wMl?”
”1 mean the buildings,’ ’answered
I Smoot. “Government employes don’t
• move fast enough to fail down.”
Hedrick Sentenced to Twenty Years.
Lexington, May B.—Larthy Hed
rick, convicted this morning by a
: jury in Superior Court here of sec
, owl-degree murder for the slaying at
Thomaaviiie March 2fi of John Kind
ley, was sentenced to serve not less
! than twenty years nor more than
thirty years in State pen. Judge Fin
ley pronounced a minimum sentence
of twenty-five years shortly after
the verdict came in, but before court
adjourned consented to Cut off five
years from Hie minimum with the
maximum unchanged.
The jury remained out with the
case from six o'clock Friday evening
until ten o’clock this morning, their
deliberations were between first and
second degree murder. It was fram
ed. the twelve standing four -vir fiyst
degree and eight for second until this
morning.
It is not expected in court circles
that Hedrick will appeal, but will
probably begin serving time at once
Ash Far Removal of Signs From the
Highways.
Asheville, May 10.—A campaign to
eliminate signboards from the high
ways of western North Carolina lias
been launched by residents and prop
erty owners along the Black Moun
tain road who have prepared nn
agreement ami a petition they .will
present to the state highway offi
cials.
The. agehcuient j*. Ktat HitfUStS
nf flie papers wilt refuse to atTifT
further billboard space on their prop
erty after existing contracts have ex
pired ami til at the property owners
| along the highway other than those
necessary for conducting their busi
ness.
The petition asks the state high
way officials to prevent the erection
of all advertising signs on highway
No. 10, or that leading to Black
Mountain.
One arm at the wheel, plus one
aromul tlio waist, equals two in a hos
pital.
OOOOOOOQOOOOOOPOOOOOOOOQ
I If It Is I
NEW
HAVE
IT
|[ {Robinson’s I
:! Millinery Dept. j||
; ; MISS ALLIE LEGO, Prop. !j>
Phone 830
OCCCKXIOCOOOf nOOtYVXIOOW w
Fresh Rolls
and Bread
Too Hot to Bake. We have
Freeh Finger Rolls and Fresh
Bread Ditily
Cabarrus Cash
Grocery Co.
i *
THE COHCORb DAILY tftttUHfc
.. ro'HWAT ~~~~ ' a-r-TiL.IM,
I ■ . I
i c£k?. T COOLC3' / EAT Like \ I
* TIME.T& I^OOWN» A TRAMP ( j
O DO A LOT OF ?S |
(\ COOW'ibJGr VNITf-\ )■ MA AH ! I^TTME-> DQKtT / ? I
—Sf, igg,., j j
' WVO :
l RouGmsio i-r.( - |
MOM’N POP r BY TAYLOR |
C VIELL HERmw- mot a BiT-TrtC First '\r - ( the mejct job Sortin' V,
HAVE ANT LOCK T PLfcCC J, WENT THEV * U f VdASHERS IN A MACHINE SHOP y|BI \ i«
i FINDINQ A JOB [ ME ID WHEEL IQ V BUT L PASSED IT UP BECAUSE THE J|fj\.
Today* Brick Sot the job was fVL work was Too i_k3ht- a man itUl 1 XI
a&Z-l Tvirfl ffll Too H6AYYEOR Aie-I /ly Vt of MY INTELLIGENCE _ Vflll I f u
r . 9e |
fl / then a fella vmmTso To gimme k/ \ could hnye had k good job
Ml A job doin' house to house canvassin' ® Ifll workin' in a paint shop botT'm
Wf Birr i<JAver upTHt ioea because ayraid of ius paimter'S colic- Jw
' , .. ■ ,
OOO^OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOdOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBOfIg^*
I TTiree-Act Play
I “JOE GUESS* WINS $1000”
| COURT~ HOUSE, THURSDAY, MAY 6th, 7:30
j Play will be of interest to every Farmer milking cows for profit. 8 fit
E and humor. Bring your wives and enjoy a good laugh. M'<r»
£ No charge for admission. Everything Free. IE?!
X COUPON—PiII Out and Present at Dwr!
S Name _ No. of-. Cows * ICcic
Address _ -Q «*>
I Cash Feed Store 1}
8 PHONE 122 SOUTH CHURCH ST. 8
bOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO6OOOOOOOOOOOO
, Jr _ _ ■ ■ - rJ*
| FANCY DRY,GOODs' ' j
' : ~ " 1 - •****'
hw
DELCO LIGHT j
Light Plants and Batteries
Deep and Shallow Well Pumps for Direct or Alter- g**
| nating current and Washing Machines for Direct or AD 9
| ternating Current. /
R. H. OWEIN, Agent
j —Phone 669 ' Concord, N. C.
Good Used Cars For Sale fa
Ford Touring, 1923 Model
Overland 4 Touring, 1924 Model
Studebaker Bix Sii Sedan, 1923 Model ®1
Overland 4 Touring, 1923 Model.
Auto Supply & Repair Co. jp
■ • TROY COUCH HAMMOCK OH YOUR LAWN OR
PORCH WILL MAKE THIS SUMMER
WORTH LIVING TO YOU
! ! /■ au<l se ® bcautiful patterns, ' especially our Model C I
£ torch Hammock, covered witUfinely woven Double Filled Duck
B b 's a ' v "! th J,lpaneH<! Pagoda Motif. They will not fade, crack or
| f?“ en "hen exposed to the weather. A rich dignity is created by
3 1u ’ I,sc 0 Art Motifs on Couch Hammocks constructed in the three
„» panel effevt. Then, too,, the Troy Hammock lias many exclusive sea- j
I] tu res which we will be glad to show you.
I frien j e * Ves Tour Contcst Closes Monday. May 3rd. Help your jj
; H. B. WILKINSON
lii Out of the High Rent District, Where Parking Space Is Plentiful
■n and time unlimited.
|» Concord Kannaoolis, Mooresville China Grove *
:x:j A2 : :Tr.:r l. . L.^:uraa
Hot Water
This gas hot water heater
is surely a friend in need and
a friend indeed of every cook
match and in a few minutes
steaming hot water will ran
Pays for itself quickly.^ o*** 0 ***
E.B. GRADY
PLUMBING AND HEATING DEALER
Office and Show Room 38 .g. Corbin St. Office Phone 334 W
THE DAILY TRIBUNE
THE PROGRESSIVE FARMER L
BOTH ONE TEAR AT THE FOLLOWING PRICES: H
In State outside Concord 55.25 '"iSjU
The Progressive Farmer is the best farm paper published, and ito«V
9 price is SI.OO a year. ~ - •• «|K&!
You need not pay for the Progressive Farmer at the same time you Kd
pay for The Tribune. We will get it for you a whole year at any time ■
on payment of only 25 cents. H
Pa . y £’ ur subscription to The Tribune to any contestant, hut 111
wine to The Tribune office to. pay for your Progressive Farmer. 9
PAGE SEVEN