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THE DAILY TAR HEEL
Sunday, January 8, 1 967,
Im Our Opinion .
First Epistle To Tarheelia
And Every Ruler Had His Title In His Time
I
1. Now these are the tribes of
student body leaders and the goods
and evils which today, in their so
journs in office, begat and the
titles bestowed upon them by their
friends and foes.
2. There was, in about the time
of the great war between the
blacks and whites in the village
of the Chapel on the Hill, a ruler,
one Michael, the son of Lawler.
3. And it came to pass that Mi
chael, being of resolute heart and
possessed with a love for his fellow
man of the opposite race, issued
statements whiqh did not please
the people of his land. And, lo,
he decreed that those shop keepers
of the village who had it in their
hearts to hate the black man would
no longer deal in trade with his
people.
4. Now his people, when they
heard of this, were .wrought with
anger, and their hearts were hard
ened against their leader, and they -turned
away from him.
5. And they bestowed upon him
titles in bountiful supply and of a
nature that the children of the
village were. scarce allowed to
wander from their mothers, lest
they hear the names be spoken.
And though they were many , in
number, they were all erased from
the books of memory, but all who
lived in the land knew that Mi
chael of Lawler had a title.
II
1. Now, during these troubled
days, there was within the circle
of power one prince-in-waiting to
the throne, Robert the . Spear Man.
. .. 2. ; And : Robert was a : just and
honest man and held in favour of
his people. His accomplishments
were many, and , it came to pass
that when King Lawler's days
were accomplished that he should
no longer lead the public life, Rob
ert rode to the throne amid shouts
of victory from his people.
3. The reign of Robert was one
of peace throughout the land and
many were the people who loved
their kind and held him in high
regard. And because of his stately
manner he was known to many as
Lord Robert..
4. But, behold, the Great Spirit
of Scholarly Learning beckoned to
Lord Robert that he should leave
his home and family and journey
across the great body of water
where he would be instructed in
all the knowledge of the world.
Ill
1. And it came to pass that when
Robert vacated the throne there
arose a bitter struggle between his
prince-in-waiting Donald of Car
son and the leader of the oppos
ing tribe Paul the Son of Rich
ard. 2. And this was a troubled time
throughout the land as the people
were laden with indecision con
cerning who should inherit the
throne. .
3. Donald was a man blessed with
the ability to gain the love and
confidences of those with whom
he tarried, and his words often
quieted the fiercest storm raged
by his enemy.
4. And he became known with
in the enemy camp as Slippery
Don.
5. But for all the efforts of the
prince-in-waiting and his mighty
army, Paul was the choice of the
people by a norrow advantage and
the crown was placed upon his
head.
IV
1. The days of Paul, however,
were to be filled with terror and
torment. For it came to pass that
early in his" sojourn in office he
sought paths that many of his fel
low ; men considered to be the
devil's ways.
2. And there were those that
would have him deposed from the
throne. Even one of his own tribes
women a member of council of
law makers demanded his exile
saying that if he were not de
posed it would be "the prelude to
a farce and a. tragedy." And she
was known as the Rose of Sharon.
3. But the forebearance of Paul
was long and his courage great.
And even a writ of petition was
not sufficient to overcome him.
And he became known as Slick
Fixum. '
V
1. But, as all the leaders before,
Slick sought not to retain his po
sition for more than the passing of
four seasons.'
2. And he was followed on the
throne by one Robert the Powell
ful. 3. Now Robert was a man of
distinguished record, and sought to
set the house in order. But for
all his striving, his people con
ferred upon him no name, no title.
4. And his heart was heavy. For
lo, he looked to his prince-in-waiting,
William of Burlington who
was known throughout the land
as Pretty Bill.
5. And even the woman of his
eye the same Rose of Sharon as
mentioned before had a title:
Rosebud.
6. Long nights he lay awake,
tossing, longing for a title. And
when sleep finally would over
come him, his dreams were filled
with names unclaimed, names he
longed to call his own.
1
1. Then one day there came a
writer of epistles, Henry the son
'of Walsh,' who heaped great honor
upon the King.' ......
2. He praised him by comparing
his prestige to that of the chief
scribe of the village and of the
resident canines that fertilize the
mall.
3. The writer lamented that the
King's identity was a great mys
tery to much of the student body
and faculty of the ancient village
of the Chapel on the Hill.
4. But he was not to leave the
situation in such unrest as he dis
covered it, and he took it upon
himself to confer upon Robert that
for which he had yearned so long
a title: Bullet Bob.
5. And Bullet Bob was so over
come with joy that he decreed that
all the village scholars should labor
in the classroom no more after the
sixth day of the following week.
74 Years of Editorial Freedom
Fred Thomas, Editor
Tom Clark, Business Manager
Scott Goodfellow, Managing, Ed.
John Askew Ad. Mgr.
John Greenbacker Assoc. Ed.
Bill Amlong .., News Ed.
Kerry Sipe Feature Ed.
Sandy Treadwell .. Sports Editor
Bill Hass-.......... Asst. Sports Ed.
Jock Lauterer Photo Editor
tChuck Benner Night Editor
STAFF WRITERS
Don Campbell Lytt Stamps, Er
nest Robl, Steve Bennett, Steve
Knowlton, Judy Sipe, Carol Won
savage, Diane Warman, Karen
Freeman, Cindy Borden, Julie
Parker, Peter Harris, Drum
mond Bell, Owen Davis, Joey
Leigh, Dennis Sanders.
CARTOONISTS
Bruce Strauch, Jeff MacNelly
The Daily Tar Heel is the official
news publication of the University of
North Carolina and is published by
students' daily except Mondays, ex
amination periods and vacations.
Second class postage paid at the
Post Office Chapel Hill, N C
Subscription rates: $4.53 per semes
ter; $8 per year. Printed by the
Chapel Hill Publishing Co., Inc., 501
W. Franklin St., Chapel Hill, N. C.
'As A Matter Of Fact, I Am Of The Opinion That Mine
Is The Only Course You Are Taking
Try . r
tea :k.
to
In Letters
General Mitts Wo.
Illegal, Immoral
Editor, The Daily Tar Heel:
As a graduate of the Univer
sity, Class of 1916, and a na
tive of North Carolina, I take
a great pride in our student
leadership which has joined
the other great educational in
stitutions across the country
in challenging the Johnson Ad
ministration's illegal, immor
al and genocidal war against
the people of Viet Nam.
This war is a disgrace of
every American and a betray
al of every decent thing for
which our country has ever
stood.
I cannot advise anyone to
violate the law by refusing to
serve if drafted because I can
not serve his sentence if and
when he is convicted and sent
to prison. But I am confident
those who do so will not be
considered enemies of the peo
ple of the United States or the
future governments of the
United States, once rationality
is restored.
I urge each of you to use
your individual influence and
all political power possible to
inform all public , officials at
every level that you and your
friends will oppose anyone of
them who favors Johnson's
war in Viet Nam.
This is not only legal, but in
the best traditions of a free
society. In fact, if you do not
do this, you will not have any
freedoms whatever, and this
will happen to you very soon.
The military draft should be
abolished forthwith. It is ob
scene to force men to kill and
be killed in the absence of a
national emergency.
The American men and boys
being killed and killing in Viet
Nam are not defending the
American people. They are be
ing used in the predatory in-
ArtHoppe
A Sad Tale About
Publish And Perish
Once upon a time there
were twin brothers named Da
mon and Pythias Smeecher,
who shared a deep love of
learning. The only difference
between them was that Damon
loved to acquire learning and
Pythias loved to give it away.
Loving learning as they did,
they naturaly joined the fac
ulty of the University of Mega
,polis, which was the greatest
treasure trove of learning in
the whole wide world.
Damon decided to become a
scholar of ancient Etruscan
funeral orations because he
loved dead languages and
things like that. Pythias decid
ed to become a teacher of
Life, because he loved life and
things like that.
In hardly any time at all,
Damon became the greatest
scholar of ancient Etruscan fu
neral orations in the whole
wide world. He wrote papers
and books and was universal
ly recognized as a leading au
thority in his field by both
othet authorities in his field.
The only cross he had to
bear was the university reg
ulation requiring him to lec
ture to students from 1 p.m.
to 1:40 p.m. on alternate Wed
nesdays. With a great effort, he
would tear himself away from
his beloved Etruscan funeral
orations, scurry to the lecture
hall and rattle off his lecture
without once looking up from
his notes. Actually, he de
livered the exact same lecture
for 32 years. But as he de
livered it entirely in ancient
Etruscan, which nobody un
derstood, there were few com
plaints. So grants poured in" to Da-
; mon from the Ford, Rockefel- '
ler and Maidenform Founda
. tions. He was made a full pro
fessor at 27, head of his de
partment at 31 and was alr
ways described at faculty teas
as "a jewel in the diadem of
this great university."
Meanwhile, his brother Py
thias became the greatest
teacher of Life in the whole
wide world.
His students loved him.
They would flock to sit at his
feet as he taught them how
the stars wheel in their cours
es, why a cowslip blooms and
what goodness was. He poured
out everything he knew about
everything and a generation of
students grew up wiser and
kinder, instilled with a love of
learning and a love of life.
Of course, this kind of teach
ing took a lot of time and Py
thias never did finish his pa
per entitled "What Life Is All
About." But, as he said to
himself, "No scholarly journ
al would publish a paper like
that anyway."
At the age of 62, Pythias was
called into the Dean's office.
"Look here, Smeecher," said
the Dean, "I noticed your
name on the faculty roster.
, What do you do around here
anyway?" .
"I guess I just teach, sir,
said Pythias apologetically.
"Good heavens, Smeecher,"
cried the Dean, canceling his
contract on the spot, "how
can we go on being the great
est treasure trove of learning
in the world, if you keep giv
ing the stuff away?"
Moral: The modern univer
sity is a perfect place to get
an education. If you're a mem
ber of the faculty. '
terest of a few corporations
owned by a silent group of war
profiteers.
The Johnson Administration
is doing the same evil things
to the American people that
Hitler, Mussolini and To jo
regimes did to the German,
Italian and Japanese people
earlier.
BGen. Hugh B. Hester,
, USA (Ret.)
St. Petersburg, Florida
Powell Put Down
Editor, The Daily Tar Heel:
Son of a gun.
The president of the Student
Body and Webster's diction
ary, along with the NSA, are
in disagreement. "Loya 1"
means "faithful to the lawful
government," says Webster's.
It would seem that the word
"lawful" is the key to the
NSA's latest fit of immature
and hasty action, endorsed by
President Powell.
It is not lawful, with minor
exceptions, for a person who
lives under United States law
to refuse to bear arms when
so requested. It is lawful and
morally indicated for any per
son to vote to change peace
fully the government which
made those laws, when requir
ing him to contradict his be
liefs. I ask Mr. Powell how he,
in good conscience, suggests
that the United States should
abandon the people of South
Viet Nam. Similar abandon
ment of the populations of Cu
ba, Germany, and Nationalist
China has proven not only
disastrous to U. S. prestige
world-wide but also damaging
to the American economy
when trying to salvage the re
mains: Formosa . . . Bay of
Pigs . . . Berlin Airlift.
The use of force to oppose
forceful imposition of tyranny,
Mr. Powell, is in the best tra
ditions of this country. Per
haps when your friends in NSA
achieve the mental voting age,
they may also achieve a peace
ful change in our country's
government.
James W. Sturges
Notice
It has come to the attention
of the members of the editor
ial staff that a large number
of students have, from time to
time, found material on this
page that they as individuals
have considered to be in poor
taste. The staff would extend
to them an apology, for in the
heat of our passions we are
prone to write things that we
later realized could be said in
a more pleasant manner.
Particular reference is
made to last Friday's ode to
"hardly hamburgers," which,
we understand, caused such a
widespread epidemic of upset
stomachs that Alka Setlzer
stock jumped ten points on the
New York Exchange.
Sorry, folks.
John Greenbacker
A Concise Statement
Of A War's Dilemma
FROM THE CHER AW (S.C.) CHRONICLE
There are many contradictions in the war in South
Viet Nam. Heroism and horror, bestiality and beauty
exist side-by-side. There is courage and bravery and
deep devotion to duty, and there, is cowardness, con
fusion, and tragic comedy.
This war is deeply troubling because it does not
affect everyone, and there is a feeling of unfairness
about the draft. There is doubt about the depth of na
tional commitment.
The real tragedy of war affects those most who are
changed by it, who become hardened and calloused
and somehow dehumanized. Fortunately, most com
bat servicemen are not affected that way. They do
what they must, out of love of country and devotion
to their fellows, and they want to come home and
forget it as quickly as possible. Some have a real
sense of mission and a personal understanding of what
they are fighting for. These are the lucky ones.
It is hard to justify intervention in South Viet Nam
if one believes that modern weapons and communica
tions have made the role of world policeman imprac
tical for America. There are those who believe the
H-bomb and the intercontinental ballistic missile have
rendered the concept of American dominance in Asia,
or even in Europe, obsolete.
There are other countries in the world, and Rus
sia and China, despite their enmity to one another,
must be reckoned with on every continent. Perhaps,
this point of view argues, spheres of influence and a
"Fortress America" make more sense than interven
tion and a military expression of internationalism.
Yet when one follows these arguments to their nat
ural conclusion, who is going to say that the United
States should abandon their traditional friends in Asia,
such as Japan, India, Australia and the Philippines?
Perhaps the line we should draw is not Viet Nam or
Cambodia or even Thailand, but the larger; more vi
able nations that are more willing and capable of de
fending themselves, especially those that are separat
ed from the Chinese by water and mountains.
Perhaps the most meaningful war against com
munism is not one of bullets and men, but one of food
and ideas. India, the next most populous country in
the world after China, spends 33 cents a year on the
education of its children. There are 130 million In
dian children who attend no school at all.
China has a terribly difficult, time providing for
her own economic needs. Can she undertake to dom
inate, and feed, all of Asia? If she did, might she not
collapse under the weight of her effort?
Perhaps. But who is bold enough to advocate,
straight out, that America remove her forces from
Viet Nam and abandon millions of Vietnamese vic
tims to the homicidal impusles of the North Vietna
mese and Chinese leaders? Dare we renege on our
moral commitment?
If we do not manage to negotiate some settlement,
however, perhaps halfway between victory and de
feat, we risk an expansion of the war. Already we
have a couple of divisions in Thailand, which may
provide the, next battle ground. What about the mor
al commitment to ourselves not to become bogged
down in an Asian land war? Can the moral and ec
onomic strength of America afford ten years of jun
gle war, albeit a limited one? Some hard decisions
will have to be made.
A woman recently mailed us an excerpt from a
letter her son, a captain in the Green Berets, wrote
his sister. This young man, 28, feels from his own van
tage point overseas that the United States is on the
right course. His mother says all of his letters are
optimistic about the future, including that of the young
Vietnamese. They are full of encouragement and nev
er reveal any self pity.
In one revealing paragraph, the officer writes:
Four months and a few days until I am back again
in the States. It takes a tour like this to refresh your
appreciation for your own country. The United States
is so great that many men are willingly risking
and sacrificing their lives. There is no greater
sacrifice. I am very proud to be able to serve here.
Don't ? listen to some who sell our country and people
short. We are very lucky to be Americans."
This is a very inspiring and comforting letter,
and, we believe, typical of GI sentiment. It does not
share any real insight t as to whether we should or
should not be in Southeast Asia, but it does measure
the devotion and patriotism of Americans, which have
always defended this country in time of danger.
A Poetic Plug
Editor, the Daily Tar Heel:
'Tis the season to be weary
Hearts sink low, eyes grow heavy.
Hark the sounds of approaching exams,
A host of sighs and hearty damns !
But rest, ye merry gentlemen,
Let not tests you dismay.
For when all books are used and worn,
Lined and torn,
There comes a saving day.
So, come all ye money-mindful,
Make the student Co-op book sale joyful,
triumphantly successful.
Bearing your books, traverse from afar.
Searching ever, you will never
Find prices as good as these ar$!
Donna Reif snider
Student Coop