The Daily Tar HeelMonday, November 26, 19843
Buddies
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Program allows chances for special friendships
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By NANCY ATKINSON
Staff Writer
Take a needy child and give him an adult friend,
one who is caring, dependable and enthusiastic, and
that's a special relationship. Multiply it 190 times and
it's not just special, it's the Campus Y Big Buddy
program.
"It's the biggest Big Buddy program in the state,
and it's the biggest it's ever been," said Murphy
Townsend, co-chairman of the program. "Everyone
knows by word of mouth how much fun the program
is."
Designed as a community outreach, the program
begins at the demand level in the elementary schools.
Beginning with the academic year, the program
requires each Big Buddy to meet with the referring
counselor of his or her Little Buddy and that he or
she attend workshops.
Enthusiasm, time and stability are all important
qualities in a Big Buddy, but stability is what these
children most need from someone, Townsend said.
"We'd like the Big Buddy to set a time every week
to visit, because we want the children to anticipate
their coming and to know they can depend on it,"
Townsend said.
Big Buddies spend at least two to three hours a
week with their Little Buddies, in many group and
individual activities: rollerskating, bowling, horseback
riding, holiday parties or just walking around campus
and having fun together.
Rachel Shanberg, guidance counselor at Carrboro
Elementary School, said, "It would be better for these
children not to have the experience than to have it
and be denied because a Big Buddy didn't follow
through." Shanberg praised this year's Big Buddies
for their dedication and enthusiasm.
"(The Little Buddies) are kids I think would benefit
from a special relationship," Shanberg said. "They
come from families where the parents may not have
the time to talk or the resources to do things with
the child."
The children do not need another disciplinarian
or babysitter, but a role model and friend, said
Glenwood Elementary School guidance counselor
'Doug had heard all about Carolina basketball, but he'd never been
in the stadium. I took him into Carmichael one day, and he just
stared like it was the greatest place he'd ever been. ' Tory Johnston
Becky McKee. "This (Big Buddy) is their adult friend
who pays attention to them and not to anyone else;
he's someone who they can trust," McKee said.
With more than 375 people interviewed this year,
the popular program had to turn away many female
applicants, but a shortage still occurred because not
enough male college students signed up to be Big
Buddies for the male Little Buddies, who outnumber
females 120 to 70.
"Guys in general don't run over here and turn things
in on time," Townsend said. He said they recruited
more males through advertisements.
Although children with disciplinary problems often
get along best with Big Buddies with athletic abilities,
sophomore Tory Johnston said many guys might
think the program is "not macho." Johnston said the
time he spent with his Little Buddy, Doug Farrington,
had been a great outlet.
"Being up at school, I didn't want it to be all schoo)
and fraternity, and it gives you a good feeling to dp
something you didn't have to do for someone else,"
he said. "From the time IVe known Doug until now,
hell initiate conversation when I introduce him to
people. He's becoming more open and confident."
Townsend, who has been with his Little Buddy,
Seth, for almost two years, said he felt very gratified
by the time they spent together.
"You just sort of watch his progress and it's really
neat," he said.
Big Buddies also experience the joy of simple things
as seen through a child's eyes.
"Doug had heard all about Carolina basketball,
but he'd never been in the stadium," Johnston said.
"I took him into Carmichael one day, and he just
stared like it was the greatest place he'd ever been."
Through the success of the program, everyone has
come out happy: the children, the counselors and the
Big Buddies. Townsend said the children took pride
in having a Big Buddy, and he had heard good reports
from the elementary schools.
"The college students were every bit as excited as
our children were when they called," McKee said.
"I have never seen such an enthusiastic group."
Schanberg also said more Big Buddies are signing
up and seem more dedicated to the program.
"The more students that sign up the more I feel
like it will result in a match," she said. "Also as a
program becomes more entrenched you tend to
consider it as an alternative."
The program leaders spoke in glowing terms about
this year's success, but they conceded it was hard work
keeping up with buddy pairs and counselors,
rematching buddies, counseling and offering ideas to
Big Buddies, and organizing group activities.
"(The work) is dealing with little problems every
day. There's a ton of organization with a group this
size," Townsend said.
Missy Bell, also Big Buddy co-chairman, said the
program was worth the effort. She said, "The most
rewarding thing is seeing the Big Buddy groups around
campus and to see that it's actually working and not
just a bunch of paperwork."
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OTH Jamie Moncrief
Campus Y's program lets students have fun with their Little Buddies.
Here, Doug Farrington, 6, of Carrboro, tosses a Frisbee.
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