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DTHOmnibusThursday, January 26, 19895 Yee-haw! An inside look at American country music By TROY OWENS Guest Writer To fully appreciate any music genre, you have to learn to deal with certain clashes of style within each sterotype. You begin to accept particularly annoying bands or singers as merely daily hazardslike zits, registration holds, skateboarders or activists. In country music, the same is true. Country music is intended solely as a complement to raising hell or drowning sorrows. Let's face it, country is not fun for dancing or air guitar. But, in the onslaught of a good cry or meaningful inebri ation, country music is certainly a cozy companion. Once again, however, the "Amer ican Music Awards" nominees do not fully reflect the better offer ings of country music Several of the better-known names are miss ing from the nominations (such as Conway Twitty. Don Williams, Dwight Yoakum, Dan Seals, George Jones and Willie Nelson), so claiming that these nominees are the best of country music is like saying that G105 plays the best rock ti' roll. Nevertheless it might be fun to sort through the confusion and pick the winners Here goes- Favorlte Male Vocalist This is a tough decision this year, because all of these are respectable con tenders. But, George Strait doesnt write his own stuff, couldnt go beer for beer with Aunt Bea, and Strait and Randy Travis are both just too pretty for the honor. The winner, then, is Hank Williams Jr., definitely not a pretty boy, and a good bet to drink Aunt Bea under the table. Favorite Female vocalist: Easy win here for Reba McEntire. Two reasons: No competition, and her voice does things a whole symphony on LS.D. could never do. Favorite Duo or Croup: (Refer to Rule 2 towards the end of this column) Despite country music rule 2, I have to choose somebody. Ala- bama's out. (They're the WHAM! of country music.) The Oak Ridge Boys are out, too. (They did for country music what Sylvester Stallone did for arm wrestling in "Over the Top.") That leaves us with The Judds as champions, which brings up two important questions: first, which came first, Winona or Naomi, and second, has anyone ever been with both of them at once, and, if so, how was it? (I love your Judds, baby!) Favorite New Artist: Defi nitely Patty Loveless, because she must have been in at least three good porn flicks. (She's the one with the num-chucks and the blow torch.) Favorite Single: My pick here is Alabama's Tallin' Again" running a close second to Randy Travis' "I told You So." The man's voice is I I V i 9 c 17 U $ I , r 1 7 . ; ' The Oak Ridge Boys: Sure to be beaten out by The Judds in the "Favorite Duo or Group" category. st'N new. stiil amazing and the Buck Owens are obvious excep- Quy's belt buckle is just too damn tions, and I think Johnny Cash is D'9 to ignore. Co get 'em Randy! on the wagon now - but that's Favorite Album: This is okay because his kids were born another close one. George Strait's drunk.) ",f You Airt Lovin. You Aint Livin' " Rule under no circumstan- 52?? a"c l?n! !?7X SJJSSE. ebi, uul ii cam compete wnn with Randy Travis' "Always and Fore ver," which has been on the charts for ahbout 47 years and is one of George Bush's kinder, gentler favorites. This album could make Oilie North break down crying and confess anything. Ricky Van Shel ton's "Wild Eyed Dreams" is also a pretty good effort but I'd say Randy is in command now. Overall, there are some rela tively mediocre nominees for the Troy Owens is a senior advertising awards, but I'm still troubled by major from Raleigh whose mother some of the content and char- knows he doesnt really like beer acter of the modern country and that he's never been in Bub's sound. According to David Allen or Troll's past 9 pm coe, certainly a clean-cut and well- groomed guy, and the perfect role model for every young man, 'the perfect country and western song" should include something about "Mama - Trucks - Trains Prison or Gettin' Drunk." I guess it's hard to find all these crucial elements in every song, so I've taken it upon myself to provide you with a few guidelines for choosing optimum country music Rule 1: Girl country music reeks. (Except for Patsy Cline, who's dead, and Reba McEntire, who has the voice.") Rule 2: Country duos or groups reek. They are generally regarded as namby pamby pseudo-country creations of the "Hee Haw" gener ation. (Except, of course, for the Bellamy Brothers.) Rule 3-. Ideally, good country music singers should be able to quaff down a fifth of Jim Beam and a case of Bud before and after they do anything productive in the morning. (Randy Travis and 4? : t A A icjucicu t ymju ir ne (jrdu.it.eb either of the following "Urban Cowboyesque"sins: BIG HAIR or I.B.S (imported Beer Sipping). No exceptions. Rule 5: (somewhat optional) Good country songs are usually played repeatedly in local bars about one hour before closing time with the entire clientele acting as enthusiastic backup. Luncheon ltul Wcckends: 5:00 ffl ' p WXYC Top 20 . Gipsy Kings Gipsy Kings 2. Donnor Party Donnor Party 3. The Fall I am Kurios Oranj 4. Wolfgang Press Bird Wood Cage 5. Loo Reed New York 6. Syd Barrett Opel ? Violent Femrnes 3 8. Death of Samatha Where the Women Wear the Glory and the Men Wear the Pants 9. Fugazi Fugazi 10. Bongos Bass and Bob Never Mind the Sex Pistols 11. Roger Manning Roger Manning 12. Woody Guthrie Oust Bowl Ballad 13. Willie Dixon Hidden Charms 14. Camper Van The Eddie Chatter Box Chadoourne -Double Love Trio Album 15. Jonathon Segal Storytelling 1 6. The Reivers End of the Day 17. Bad Brains Live 18. Midge Ure Answers to Nothing 19. New Order Technique 20. Various firtfsifs Brazil Classics One Learn About wrong NICE - PRICE-BOOKS RECORDS MAGAZINC.S 300 East Main Carrboro 929-6222 Sunday Prime Rib Luncheon Buffet $79' All You Can Eat! Every weekday, we also offer: 10 course International luncheon buffet s5.95 Mini-Buffet (any 2 courses 8c fried rice) s3.95 Salad Bar, cooked vegetable 8c soup 3.95 Our Restaurant is lavishly decorated and our prices are reasonable. We feature exquisite dinner cuisine at a $7. 00 or $S. 00 range for our A la Carle dishes. Bar and Lounge Italian, Chinese &: Indian Cuisine Banquet Facilities for wedding rehearsal dinners I-unch: 1 1:30-2:30 (except Sal.) ,t 7 JZ ' . - y Dinner: 5:00-9:30 CM Tony Wmgfrom Chma mvtU-you fr Sunday International by our fabulous dishes from Europe U "l ..r r: r. 1.7. lett 1 1:30-2:31) Uiina, pleasing uu; nutsl critical - 1 1:00 . 1 1013 uurnam-cnapci rim Diva. 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Daily Tar Heel (Chapel Hill, N.C.)
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Jan. 26, 1989, edition 1
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