a little ::onsen:e. Vaccinating un Obdurate but Farttighted Girl. "On my right arm, please," said the sweet young thing. The physician who was arranging the vaccine points looked surprised, j The mother, who was supervising j the proceeding, seemed even more astonished. ""You mean your left arm, Clara," ahe asserted. "No, I don't; I mean mv right arm," answered the willful girl. "But it will annoy you so much less on your left arm, insisted the mother. The girl blushed, but shook her head. "You don't understand," she ?aid. "1 confess I don't," admitted the j mother. "Very likely that is because you were not vaccinated at a time when you were engaged to be married," suggested the girl. "Harold has been vaccinated on his left arm, so I?er?as a mere matter of con venience, don't you see, when you consider the juxtaposition in some circumstances"? Here the mother and the physi cian made a mental diagram of the customary situation when two hearts are beating as one and quickly saw that the girl was exceptionally farsighted.?Chicago Post. NOT QUITE SURE. Shopman?Let me Bee, madam, what size do you take? Lady?1 think it's fours?or it may be threes? But, there, 1 am not quite sure, it may be twos or? what mrs. d. said. "If any one should call this aft ernoon, Mary, say that I am not well," said a mistress to her newly engaged servant. "I'm afraid i ate a little too much of that rich pud ding for lunch, and it or something else has brought on a severe head ache. I'm going to lie down." A few minutes later the mistress, from her room near the lieud of the ?tairs, heard Mary say to two aristo cratic ladies who had called for the first time, "Yes'm, Mrs. Browne is at home, but sh..- ate so much pud ding for lunch she had to go to bed."?Tit-Bits. the oi.d. old stort. Smith?Time is a wonderful change artist. Jones?What is it now? Smith?You read of that bank clerk who recently got away with a lot of money ? Jones?\ es. Smith?Well, I remember when be played on an amateur baseball team a few years ago and was so conscientious he wouldn't even steal a base.?Chicago News. ahotuer RECORD broke*. "Good evening, Miss Flitters. How do? I expected to be cal'ed oat of town today, but wasn't, and as I have seats for the theater I thought you might like to go. It is dreadfully late for an invitation, I know, but"? "What time is it, Mr. Crawler P* "It is 20 minutes past 7." "I will be ready in five minutes." And she was.?Cleveland Plain Dealer. THE LIEITE*A*1"S TALE. On the sands along the beach at Manila we spied a double almond? the beautiful native girl and I. "Shall we eat a philopena ?" I asked gayly. At this I thought she would fall to the ground from sheer fright, so colorless grew her cheeks. Proba bly she thought I was a madman, probably a cannibal?who knows ? ?Indianapolis Sun. BLIGHTED HOPES. "Can you not trust me, Regi nald?" abe sighed, gazing into his eyes with a pleading that waa hard to resist. "No, Roxana; the boss says ev erything must be sold on a cash ba sis hereafter." And he gently but firmly put the ribbons back in the showcase.? Baltimore American. her TnrrwrH. "She seems so bappy. Did she marry him for love or for money ?" "Neither; she took him to spite a lot of other girls."?/Chicago Times-Herald. ( I District Conference at Clayton The Raleigh District Confer ence of the M. E. Church, South, convened in Clayton, N. C.. at a. in., March 27th, with Rev. I. T. Gihbs, D. D., Presiding Elder of the District in thj chair. The session wax full of interest from the first to the last. Theattend ance was unusually large. Dr. (libbs, universally loved throughout his District, a model presiding Elder in every sense of the word, presided over the de li Iterations of the body, with marked ability, grace, dignity. Encouraging reports came from every pastoral charge, by which reports it become evident that the work of the church on the District is t>eing done effectively, and that the general state of the church is gratifying. Every interest of the work was carefully looked into and freely discussed. An afternoon session was de voted to missions with Rev. R. H. Broom in the chair. This work was fully discussed and plans laid to accomplish greater things fur the upbuilding of the Kingdom of our Lord. Another afternoon session wax devoted to the Sunday School work, with Joseph (1. Drown, Esq., of Raleigh, N. C., in the chair. The work of the Sunday School was freely discussed by the lay brethren present and a very able paper from the pen of W. S. Stevens, of Sniithfield, N. C., was read and enjoyed by all. Another session was devoted to the Epworth League work with Dev. G. T. Adams, a prince among pulpit orators, in the chair. All these interests of thechurch were inquired into in the spirit of earnestness with now and then a ripple of spaikling wit. Prominence was given to devo tional exercises and we were edi fied by able sermons from day to day, all of them being of a high order. The sermon by Rev. T. N. Ivey, D. 1)., editor of the Raleigh Christian Avocate, was excep tionly fine and deserves special mention. Rev. E. A. Yates, I). D., was present as the representative of Trinity College to the delight oi all and edified us with an able address on Christian Education. It would show a lack of appre ciation of which I do not intend to be guilty, to close this article without special mention of the royal hospitality with which we were entertained by the good people of Clayton. Tney literally flung w ide their doors and turned the town over to us. Thev know how to do the hon ors of the occasion. May the blessing of God abide with tnem. K. 1). Holmes. Consumption is, by no means, the dreadful disease it is thought to be? in the beginning. It can always be stopped? in the beginning. The trouble is: you don't know you've got it; you don't believe it; you won't believe it? till you are forced to. Then it is danger ous. Don't be afraid ; but attend to it quick? you can do it your self and at home. Take Scott's Emulsion of Cod Liver Oil, and live care fully every way. This is sound doctrine, whatever you may think or be told; and, if heeded, will save life. If you have not tried It, send for free sample. Its agreeable taste will surprise Vou. SCOTT A BOWNE. Chemists. 409 Pearl Street. New York. 50c. and $ I .OO; all druggists. For high grade Fertilizers for nil crops, see Cavenaugh & Co., Benson, N. C. For all of the leading daily and weekly papers, visit the News Stand of R. E. Snipes, Selma. N. C. Garden seed, millet seed and Irish potatoes, in good quality and quantity for sale. W. M. Sanpeks. Hate no one; hate their vices, not themselves.?J. G. C. Bfain ard. Hon. E. W. I'ou insures all his projtertv with .f. H. Kirkman. Sale of Land for Taxes. On Monday, the 6th day of May. 1901. at 12 o'clock 1 shall se l at the court house door In Smithfleld, o satisfy taxis due for the year 1900, the real estate specified below: Wilhon'h Mjllh Townhihh. Tai. A. B Austin, 824 acres $7.88 H. K. Blaylock, 172 acres 9 .17 Mamie Hedgepeth one half acre ... 1 87 A. D. Jones heirs 895 acres 14.88 Bettie R. Parker 33 acres 55 H. B. Turner heirs 100 acres 188 Kdlth Turner, 214 5 5o Zilpha Turner, 1 lot 1 88 It V. Wallace, 74 acres 92 Clayton Townhhip. Dillon A vera. 105 acres $4 29 Klchard Bryant 1 lot 92 j Haywood Barber, 1 lot 87 Jane Durham. 1 lot 14 Isaac Jones. 50 acres 8 88 William A Jones, 84 acies 2.41 Taylor Jonas, 894 acres 1.70 John Parti blue, 1 lot 23 Richard Rand. 1 lot .28 Pleahant Grove. P. T Massey, Agent, 95 acres |1 17 M eadow. Jno. V. Eason, 262 acres $5.33 Bentonbville. W. R. F. Edwards, 404 aeres 60 Inguamh. Atkinson and wife. 86 acres 70 L. L. Booth, 12 acres .40 Dock Watson, 17 acres 84 Boon Hill. Lucy Atkinson. 1J acres 10 D. H Davis, 29 acres 67 Nancy Evans heirs, 15 acres 50 Gabriel Holt, 106 acres 2 67 W 11 Massey, 182 acres 5 38 lola McCauley, 810 acres 6 67 Daniel Whitley, 98 acres 8.00 Marinda Warren, 12 acres 17 Bedlam Townbhip. I D. M Eure, 50 acres 67 Burden Holland. 15 acres, 84 Mrs. J. II. Johnson, 84 acres. .45 J. T. Outland, 85 acres 1 41 | J. K. Outland, 65 acras 1.60] AIeey Parrish, 181 acres 2 84 ' C. A Ptttman, 51 acres 1.68 L. J. Kains, 14 acres .50 Jno. H. Kenfrnw, 20 acres .40 W. A. Watktns, 9 acres .18 W. 11. Wellons, six acret .16 O'Nkalb Townbhip. Mary U. Bunn, 70 acres $2.29 Nancv Brown, 200 2.66 c. O. Ball 43 acres 86, Cleovus Whtiley, 75 acres. 2 00 K W. Barnes, 50 acres .871 tiaston Evans, 196 acres 8.83 WiLDKRS Township. A. J. Battle, 27 acres .75 Blackman Grey, 82 acres $2.00 M. G. Wilton, 125 acres 2 29 Sklma Townbhip. C. C. Batten, 1 acre 06 Perrln Busbee, 1 lot _$6 42 j W. H. Blackmail heirs 1 lot .47 I Sarah J. Batten. 27 acres .84 Erasius Caudle heirs, I acre .47 J K. Davis heirs, 75 a res 1.00 Julian Hinton, 1 lot 22 J H. Howell, 1 lot .84 ltinda Lee . uardian, 166 aires 4.67 Claude McCauley, 1 lot 5.05 Taylor and Uowllmr, 1 lot 1.15 W xidard heirs, 1 lot .22 Smith pi eld Township. B. C. Beckwith, 81 acres $8.67 | K. B Beckwlth. 47 acres 3.67 j >mith Br< oks, 1 lot 1.83 ! W.N. Benton, deceased. 3 lots 7.34 Monroe Douhlin 1 lot 2 69 Hinton Jones, ex of A Penny, 1 lot, .99 J. T. Lan?ston, deceased, 8 acres 92 Emmie McC'ullers 1 lot 2 29 J. F. Bandera, 107 acres 2 16 J. H. Banders, 59 acris 1.00 This April 2, 11101. J. T. ELLINGTON, Bio rill Johnston Co. We have just printed a large supply of Short Form Lien Bonds and can fill all orders promptly. Hkkald office. I have a large supply of Plow Castings, Cotton Planters, Cot ton Kings, etc. W. M. SANDKKS. I The Commoner, ISSUED WEEKLT. WILLIAM J. BRYAN, Editor and Publisher. Lincoln, - Nebraska. Terma?Payable In Advance. One Year $1.00 Six Months 00 Three Months SO Single Copy 06 No travelling canvassers are employed. Terma for local agents will be aent upon application. All money should be aent by P. O. order, Eipreae order, or by bank draft on New York or Chicago. Do not sedn individual checks or stamps. We have made a Clubbing Arrangement with The Commoner, edited by William Jennings Bryan, weerebv we can furnish Tub Herald and "The Commoner" one year for $1.7Y BEATY, HOLT & LASSITER, Publishers The Herald, SMITHFIELD, N. C. Mr. J. M. Beaty used one of the Acme Guano Distributors last year and was well pleased with it. He has just bought another one of them. These distributors are for sale by W. M. Sanders, Kmithfield, N. C. The Best 10c coffee in the world at N. B. Snipes & Bro., Selma, N. C. In the best cotton growing sec tions it would look as strange to see a man sowing guano by hand through a trumpet as it would to see one sowing cotton seed by hand. Every man who has a cotton planter needs aguanodis tributor. The Acme Guano Dis tributors are for sale by W. M. Sanders, Smithfield, N. C. USE CEREA LITE AS A TOP DRESSING ON YOUR WHEAT OATS ANI) COTTON. 1 have on hand a car load of Cerealite which I will sell very low for cash or on time. Call and see me at the Register's office. J. W. Stephenson, Smithfield, N. C. Short Form Lien Bonds for sale at Herald office. The Herald ....Office is HEADQUARTERS FOR Magistrates' Blanks OF ALL KINDS. If you need any BLANKS call on us, or write All Mail Orders Beaty, Holt & Lassiter, SMITHFIELD. N. C. ' i SENSIBLE TALK FOR SENSIBLE FARMERS In buying a machine the buyer should be posted. The good points of the Osborne are too numerous to mention. They are evident to every r an that compares with other makes. This is no bare assertion, but has been proven time and time again. X?X x??* J LET /V\E SHOIV YOU The Osborne Columbia Mower, The Neatest, strongest and most, modern on the market. AN OSBORNE CATALOGUE FOR ALL WHO WANT IT. -FOR BALE BY- ' H. D. ELLINGTON, SMITIIFIELD, N. C. I Quano Distributors. ' < : j The Acme Guano Distributor is the best distributor ' ! made and every farmer needs one of them. Drawn by ; ; a horse or mule and can be regulated to 1 Sow any Quantity you Desire. It covers the guano. It saves labor and does the ? I work better than it can be done by hand. The dis I tributorsare ; I ?FOR SALE By | I I W. M, SANDERS, [ |f Smithfield, N. G. Suits to Suit You. Our ?5,000 stock of clothing is so varied and complete att to styles and sizes that the most fastidious can be easily suited. The goods were purchased by experienced cloth iers, the prices are low. the styles are the latest. Why not come now and select a suit before the sizes art- too badly broken? LOOK AT THESE PRICES. Boy Suite, J .75 to $ 5.00 Youth Suite, 2 75 to 8.50 Men's Suits, 2.75 to 17.50 | "Battle Axe" Shoes $1 to 'Reynolds" Shoes 2 to 4 NO RISK ABOUT OUR SHOES. The "Reynolds" and the Battle Axe" are both war ranted. If they are not as represented your money ia refunded, and you are out nothing. We are not Boasting Very Much when we assert that we have the largest and best assorted1 line of Shirts, Collars, Cuffs, .V TIES A and Gentleman's Notions ever exhibted in Smithfield. Inspect our stock. I Let us remind you That we carry a complete1 line of Dry Goods ancS Notions. Every depart ment is complete. HAY 1 OATS We Buy in FLOUR Car load lots. FEED J Do yon see the advantage in so doing? Our customers can point it out to you. We Buy to Sol!. There is no reason nor money in having goods on your shelf to look at. We wish to sell often. We made our prices low in order to do it. We Clothe you, We Feed you, We Feed your Stock AS WELL AM) AS CHEAPLY AS ANY ONE CAN AFFORD TO DO SOl Try us. We can suit you and We Will. Very respectfully, (raiHham, Austin & Co., DKAI.KKH IN Clothing, Dry Goods, shoes, dais,. Groceries, Feed Stuffs, Fertilizers. ^**********************3* jg SECOND-HAND J $ Sewing Hachines. j? * y? I have for sale several second-hand sewing machines. \4# VS The prices on them range from five dollars up. Most of \JU *fS them are good machines. All machines sold for ten dollars 9S or more are guaranteed. If you want to buy one of them %!(? IS come to see me or write to me, stating what price machine T you want and how much you can pay cash. w1 New Sewing Machines. is i* lf\ I have for sale the New Domestic and New Home and ^ y\ other sewing machines. I can suit you in style and price. ^ ffi I/et me know if you want to buy. ^ I J.M. BEATY. J ; Smithfield, N.