Newspapers / Brevard News (Brevard, N.C.) / April 9, 1920, edition 1 / Page 8
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y'i I::?;' ' ^./ Ji’- \ 'S:' ■ V —aOwmm* %maHBmkrn^»^ rnmSmmi^ |pl irnmi tfniiti'iif'apii^ Ilii • «iiAsii»dy|r iBSewih* iHnihgMi « Mdkkadat. I wMii SMMlb «9 iiilli ^ SlNmeiiiW^ WW Itiwdwl IwA- |»Hii<ilw—iri Hiww iiHnfc. Iferi fcia^wcililiiilir BMi<l»lwti»c»( *Tn ‘^1itrT-r-‘-*,*‘n Dm*I imgrno ir,'w.noKnaojr» Tkere we thooMUKb |m IUb0 Mr. Nocdmft dMpHotl at fcitbol MMftaodl bj • trial of PB4uJ-N A. DOITT BB AN ONBBUSVUL lifOarlroiteifofacattiiUliiilMtilijFB-R^NA, Ibwidljrottf irieadt It ltfiMalleraaattackotsripor SpanidiFlii. •oW Evmrywhi* Tmbftm or Uquld FWt ^TAmmHAHo oATMmmMAL ooMotnomm WHAT PEEVED THE RECRUIT DiaeuMion He Had With Cor poral Laft.Him Diaguated With Relief From Guard Duty. k couple of recruits of.the latest who had enlisted in the hope being sent to the Rhine, were dis* the pros and cons of army life. *lt ain't so bad,” conflded one. “Most «f It is all right, but it’s that blasted acUef from guard duty that gets me.” *^llef from guard duty!” ejaculat ed the other. “Man, you’re cuckoo! Ilwi'e’s nothing to being relieved from mard duty. It’s being on guard duty liiat's hell.” “No,” maintained the first. “It’s the idief. Why, the other day they put BK on guard for (wo hours, and It wasn't bad at all ,1ust standing round aad watcning the rest of 'em‘drilling •Bd knowing that I didn’t have to do It myself, but then when the time for vrilef came the corporal came up and SaTe me the devil.” “What for?” **Nothlng. Nothing at all. I just ceeMn't remember where I’d left my Dmi*I Forget Cutieura Talcum adding to your toilet reqoisltea. Mm wqoisltely scented face, skin, baby Md dnatliig powder and perfume, r^ totals other perfumes snperfluona. Tea may rely on It because one of the Ortlcura Trio (Soap, Ointment and TMcum). 25c each everywhere.—^Adv. Rare Sugar Found in Honey. biTestlgation of certain stores of oyatallized honey found in various places In Pennsylvania where t^e bees Isd died from starvation led to the tfacovery of a quantity of rare sugar, teown as melezitose, which has been extracted and purified and placed at the disposal of the bureau of chem> Mry. The weekly news letter of the department of agriculture says that Birtezltose is one of the rarest sugars. Mtamte quantities of it have been avall- •Me to men of science for many years, iMt the supply has nevei; been suffi’ dant to permit of extensive experimen tation. Now the United States de- *partment has several kilograms. f Father’s Amendment. ‘And what do you propose to do William?” asked tfie father of the son who has just come him after tfradaation at college. **Oh,” yawned the optimistic young “I think ru go over to New York look for a position at five thon- per—you understand? At five ind per.” *Wi, yes,” said the old man. “I un- 4hrstand. Tou mean at five thousand IRbaps.”—Pathfinder. 1 i Where? in an hour from New York a little New Jersey town a church congregation has very deeply into modem re thought and tendencies. Just deeply anyone driving by their white wooden building can tell the sign hanging by its door; here do you spend Sunday? the flrer will you spend eternity? by fire.*’ HARDLY PAID FOR EXERTION Small Sum Collected From Burglar Didn't Recompense John for His Disturbed Repose. The clock struck the hour of three. The wife rose on one elbow and lis tened. Then she nudged her side imrt- ner. “.Tohn," she whispered, “there’s a burglar downstairs.” “The deuce there is,” exclaimed John, jumping out of bed. “Hi show him.” He crepr downstairs. There was the $:ound of .1 crash, a revolver shot and the sullen thud of men engaged In mortal combat. Then a window smashed and all was still. The terri fied wife turned on the light and hur ried into the hall. “John!” she called timorously. “All right, my dear,” called John. “I found him. All he had was 60 cents.” Dr. Peery’s *^)ead Shot’* not only expels Worms or Tapeworm but'cleans out the mucus in which they breed and^ tones iq> the digestion. One dose sufficient.—Adv. Much Alike. stage manager was hurriedly instructions to his property The giving man. “Did you say you wanted a window or a widow, sir?” asked the latter, somewhat perplexed. “I said window,” he replied, and add ed, with a laugh, “but they’re both much alike.” The property man scratched his head. “Don’t see how you make that out, sir.” “Well,” replied the stage manager, “when I get near either of them I al ways look out!” More Than One. That morning the teacher had been forced to thrash two very trouble some boys, and the memory of the happening was still fresh in the other children’s minds that afternoon. She took up her history to give the assign ment on the Civil ,war, which the class was studying. “This afternoon,” she said, “we shall take ‘the hammering campaign.’ ” Everyone was amused when she said it but she, herself, led in the laugh when a tiny fellow ejaculated: “My, I thought we had that hammer ing campaign this morning!” Possibly So. “This is kinda funny,” commented Mrs. Field in the midst of her perusal of the village newspaper. “The editor of the Tojrch of Liberty refers right here to the ‘hydrant-headed octopus Wall street’ Do you supppse that is a t3rpographical error, or don’t the'«di- tor know any better?” “Oh, prob’ly he means to insinuate that the octopus has water on the brain,” replied honest Farmer Field. —Kansas City Star. Her Meaning. “I heard that pretty little woman say tl^e other day that she was going to do her best to make her Billy’s life perfectly happy. She must be very much in love with her husband.” “That wasn’t her husband she was talking about; It was her pet poodle.** ■ ^ FOOD FORTIFIES against esdiausti<m ^nd Less—if ItSs the right ktaidof food. GrapeNuts Is eaai^ digested «nid wtttt opeaiacr gpod ndncia A weU. ' balagnced raciicni. ttiob buOds . ^tissue end Increases gtrengtti : ^ fMos iiatd Mr. tU iiitti Ifttir, Tm lol^ M- glM with, tnd Ua» eoda iii^lii ^ mm9 iftt^. ■ , are tiie aaine lecten any- wIibM fa between Fib but 1oi«w ara^ II inqrtbhBii; ■bout ■pelllng.** **Toa don’t ;know modi aiof- thlDg," said y^ng Mastef^tnifBe. Ai|d 4t wtm not In l^t of blia to iay this, for Uif QfnUte aniled aod waved hla head, about » llttlo aad laui^ied and said: **Yoa*re.« polite young giraffe. Yon pay me o compll- meot when yon say I don’t Icnoir mudt. ^ **To kQow mndi It ttnpid.** **It Isn’t, according to WMoe tcXka," said Master Glrnite. **Well, a giraffe can’t do things ae> cording to folia and folks can’t do tiftngs according to giraflSes. So that la fair enough. And,” continued Mr. Giraffe, “it Is fine for a giraffe to be stupid, for a giraffe ^joys being stupid just as a camel does. “The camel is an apimal I much ad mire, for It has the good sense to be stupid and not to bother to fill Its head with de^res to be great and wise and ambitious and such!” “Well.” said Master Giraffe, **I take after you, just as we all take after the first old giraffe, who must have been a ‘Really Very Good Material.” stupid old t^lng in tlie first place to think of being such a queer beast “I don’t know \vhy he wanted to be qu^r, but I suppose he was so stupid that he lost track of the 'way his neck and legs were growing and didn’t pay any attention to them or tell them to stop until they got way beyond his having much say to them." “I don’t believe they would have stopped growing it he had told them to,” said Mr. Giraffe, “though I don’t know that any more than I know any thing else to speak of.” “W^ell, I know I was lonely and homesick when I first arrived,” said Master Giraffe. “So w’as I,” said Mr. Giraffe. “But I got over it. I found that it was nice heie; everyone was so pleasant and the food good. “We get delicious hay and meal and mulberry leaves here, and fine milk. They say we have to be careful of our dig^tion, because of the length of the time it takes to get food to our tum mies, I suppose, though I don’t know!” “But they say,” Master Giraffe add ed, “that we’re rarely ilL We aren’t so foolish as to think about whether we’re ill or well all the time, and so we stay well! “Of course we never want to get our necks too tlted out, but we have strong necks and we don’t get tired OftOT.” “You know,” said Mr. Giraffe, “we’re really very good-natured, and we’re easy to get along with. “Still, if we’re attacked, we could get at our enemies with our hoofs, which are our great means of protec tion and defense.” “We don’t spend all our time in talk ing,” said Master Giraffe. “This is the first talk we've had In ages. We’ve not bothered to talk for a long time.” “What’s the use in wasting time talking? Once in awhile, like today for a change. It’s all right. There sem to be a number of children around and they like to hear of our w^ays. “So once in a while we talk, but oh, we don’t talk to entertain each other, for such stupidity would never enter tain anyone. “And,” continued Mr. Giraffe. **lt Is enough that we are different looking and queer looking, for that makes us unlike other creatures, ai^d that is something.” “Of course.” said Master Giraffe, “other creatures may not care to look like us. I’ve heard boys and girls say they were thankiful they weren’t giraffes.” “As far as that Is concerned,” said Mr. Giraffe, “I’m glad Fm neither a boy nor a girl, Fd have to go to school and learn things. *Tm mighty glad Fm a giraffe, and others are glad they’re not so I guess, when it comes down to it we’re all pretty well satisfied.” Hia Lc(gi& WllUe—Pa, buy me a pair of skate*. Pa—^But Willie, you need shoes worse than you n^ roller skates. * WHiie--I ^nOW, but v^b€^ I havo jity roller ^tea bo the ^|oplt caa’t are atvii^ i«4 Ofiaag: iiio to^ff* of lifliiSir^lEiiy 1 tbatl a ^ Uvor fhTtr oal^ialntBaB^ivi Mrioaa toanUestioaa. Vo M* Jhatl a odA Avaiiij|jkl sbA ■arieoa eeepUeatSwi take one at beitiaM witk a awallow of *a aU. Kf aattiu ao aanaaa, ao aiekeniaf after effeeta. mdhflag ^rour eda Iim taaUhed, jottt Uver ia aetii^ jour ayatea ia pod* 2eA aad zefrMhed and yon are fediag iae ^th a hea*^ ammto for break fast. Sat what yea pleaae—ao daager. Calotabf aiO told oaly ia ori|^iial sealed padciMiWy priee thir^-flve eeata. oaly ia Every authorised to refund your m<«ey if yon are aot perfeetly delighted with Cwotabs.—(Adv.) Then ft Happened. *‘I wonder if you could?” mused the rummy, as he poured a little wood alcohol into his seltzer. “You wonder if I could what?’ demanded the barkeep, as he yanked a gun out of the drawer behind the bar. “Why, I wonder if you could call a love letter a w^rltten attachment?” re plied the rummy as he headed for the door.—Cincinnati Enquirer. fwMNl'% ilhSAmAi oiiii^ drapsrlis be alaip apir aaft fa^ for y«a«a el tile Dlrs^iea iapadiM hoar to dtaaiead 4^ovira»jMioK. aatarial, havo dnugisl ahow joa nttuBoad Cbrd. Headache? Nausea? Dizziness? M&ma* nessf Oonsiipationf Las^ and good for nothing moei of the timet 'What you need is a shaMng-up of your **innaids” 'andagingering-apalloyer. Thething fhat’U fix you up is: Dr.THACHElfS UVIRjm blood Lift off Corns! " 1 ■ Doesn’t hurt a bit and Freaione costs only a few cents. injj With your fingers! You can lift off any hard corn, soft cora, or com be tween the toes, and the'^hard skin cal luses from bottom of feet. A tiny bottle of “Freezone” costs little at any drug store; apply a few drops upon the corn or callous. In stantly it stops hurting, then shortly you lift that bothersome com or cal lous right off, root and all, without one bit of pain or sorenegg, Truly! No humbug!—^Adv. Justification. The Arist—This statue is “The Disk Thrower.” Wonderfully lifelike pose! The Other Fellow—^Yep! I reckon that disk is one o’ the jazz records. Don’t b|ame him a Mt for chuck ing it Men flatter merely to protect them selves from women who flirt. An old doctor’s prescription; in use for 68 years. Enlivens your Liver, purifies ana enriches your Blood, B^gulates your Bowels and is a fine family TONIO. Get a bottle from your drug store and you’ll soon be reelin' Hne! 31 A girl who lets a young man have his ow^n way during courtship is only biding her time. bnportant to all W«meit . Readers of this Paper Thousands upon thousands of women have kidney or bladder trouble and never suspect it. Women's complaints often prove to be nothing else but kidney trouble, or the result of fcidn^ or bladder disease. If the kidnesrs are not in a healthy con dition, they may cause the other organs to beMme diseased. Yoa nay suffer pain in the back, head ache and loss of ambition. Poor health makes you nerroos, irrita ble and may be despondent; it makra any one 80. But hundreds of women elaim that Dr. Kilmer's Swamp-Root, by restoring health to the kidneys, proved to be just the remedy needed to overcome such conditions. Many send for a sample bottle to see what Swamp-Boot, the great kidney, liver and bladder medicine, will do for them. By enclosing ten cents, to Dr. Kilmer & Co., Bin^amton, N. Y., yon may receive suoople size bottle by Pared Post. Yon can purchase medium and laige size bottles at all drug stores.—Adv. It’s surprising how much respect a worthless man Is capable of generat ing for himself. He Wasn't Lonesome. Old Lady—And what place did you spend most of your time in in France? Ancient A, E. F.’ert—Brig, ma’^m.— Home Sector.. « State cf Ohio, City Toledo, Lucas .County—ss. .Frank J. Cheney makes oath that he is senior partner of the firm of F. J. Cheney & Co., doinsT business in the City of To ledo, County and State aforesaid, and that said firm will pay the sum of ONE HUN DRED DOL.liARS for any case of Catarrh that cannot be cured by the use of HALL'S CATARBH MEDICINE. FRANK J. CHENET. Sworn to before me and subscribed In my presence, this 6th day of December. A. D. 1886. (Seal) A. W. Oleaaon, Notary. Public. HALITS CATARRH MEDIClf^ Is tak en internally and acts thrOush the Blood on the Mucous Surfaces of the System. P. J. Cheney A Co.. Toledo. Ohio. F. J. Cheney & Co.. Toledo. Ohio. Safe Bet, She’s clumsy and she’s sloppy, and she occupies much £|>ace. And for these reasons w^e would like to bet her name is “Grace.”—^AFkansaw Thomas Cat. A torpid liver prevents proper food as similation. ^ Tone up your liver with Wright’s Indian Yegetable Klls. TIvey act gently.—Adv. Too ^any men wait uAtil they have been done to a turn before turning over a new leaf. Another Royal Suggestion PIES and PASTRIES From the New Royal CooK Book CHEER up! There ia no further reason for wbnying about table va> rie^. Hie new Rc^l O)ok^ Book g;ves new suggestu for evQry meal every daj The book is so full of suH prises there will never another dull meal in thj home. Here are a'few si stions from the n< yal Cook Book. Plain Pastry This recipe is for one lai pie with top and bottom Senps flour ^teaspoon salt Jtea^lKMns Royal Baking Powder % cup Shortening eold water 81ft together flour, salt and j ihg powder: add shortient mb In very lightly with ti| flngers (the less It Is haadlf better the paste will iM^j ooKI water very rtowly. to hold dougte together work or knead dough), in halvea; roll ont one | on floured board and bottmn crust. After plej toll out other part tor ING WDER iKich I pasTOf poonRol lur ScupsL ^ % teaspoon: Powder H teaspoon salt % cup shortening Hsola water 81ft flour, baUnig aalt; add <NW-hid|] €t aM rub tn U^tly wttb flngsnr add water slowly nntU of right consistency to roll out Dlirldo in halves; roU out one half thin; put on In smaU pieoes half va- mahifag .ritortenli^r; fold vpper aad tower edges tai to osntar; fold aides In to oeato; Ibid aides to centw again; roll oat and: pnt on pie plate. Repeat wtOi other half fbr top oust. Apple Pie iteuvoons Royal Bakiag . Powder. fattp^ orl«nart^ StablerqMoas sumur ltea«ooaaiii& Sift flour, baking powdar aad salt; add Sh<ntenlng uid tuft.tn very Ui^Uy; aM JiiaK eiuM^ cold water to hold donali to gether. RoU half out onHsnred board, Une bottMtt of pte Ipiale; fill to applea, whlda haW been wariied. pared and cut laito thla. aOcet; sprittkla with mogift fla vor with dmwunon or mitiriig; wet edgea of croat wtm water: oat rrmilnijpr nf naa try; oover pie. WHMg eigw tightly tegetiier and bak# moderate oven 31 mbnttaa. '' V FRB& Contains delii^tfttL the aUdi*^ TODSAx.'to ■■ ROYAL fP'TijAl' m \ J-Ay, ^5^ - A IJ'. ((
Brevard News (Brevard, N.C.)
Standardized title groups preceding, succeeding, and alternate titles together.
April 9, 1920, edition 1
8
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