Newspapers / The Farmville Enterprise (Farmville, … / Feb. 19, 1914, edition 1 / Page 4
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GEORGE ADE "VILLAGE SAGE" Fred Kelly, Humorist, Moat Cruelly Shatter* the Story Teller"* Bucolic Dream. Fred Kelly, the Washington hu morist, vu.tcd New York the other day. lie fell in with a party of oth er literary lights. They began to discuss men and thing). By and by the conversation turned on George Ade. "He lives the Ideal life," said one. "Ho has enough money to secure every luxury, he need not work ex cept when inspiration come* and he is looked up to by every 0110 In his community." Those present nodded their head* solemnly. "What one of us," demanded the speaker, passionately, "would not give up the bustle and hurry of this frantic city if in return we might be certain of the meditative ijuiet of a small and restful community. How beautiful are the days of the village sage I" Silence for a time. Then Kelly drawled : "Do you think there's such a h? ?1 of a demand for sages PHRASE PROVED AN OLD ONE Sultan of Turkey Known as the "Sick Man of Europe" In the Seven teenth Century. Now a collector of old print* comes forward with the proof that the expression, "the sick man of Eu rope," so persistently applied for years to Tu.'key, really dates hack to the seventeenth century, when John Sobieski drove back the Turks from the gates of Vienna. He shows an old engraving with the Turk on his sick bed in the center and the doc tors representing all the nations of Europe gathered about liftn. As has been the case ever since, they cannot agree as to the treatment. All want to make an end of the Turk ; but the Spaniard wishes to apply a bomb, the Pole wishes to give him steel, the Prussian would stifle him with his cloak, etc. Change the names and costumes of the doctors, and this cartoon of nearly three centuries ago wonld answer for any of the numer ous congresses that h*v? since then attempted to settle the vraing east ern question. PARMER PLANTING THISTLE). While farmers elsewhere are work ing overtime to kill off and stamp out the Bussian thistles, E. 0. Stu art, a Grant county farmer, is plant ing them. "I made a fair test of the thistles last winter along with kafir, cane and prairie hay, and I am strong for" the thistle for cattle forage," declared Mr. Stuart. "The thistles are cut and fed before they get hard stickers 3Q them, and the cattle like them and do well on them." Mr. Stuart is preparing acres of land for thistle as a feed chop, disk ing and cross-harrowing and then sowing the thistle seed. ? New York Sun. JUST WHAT IS A "8NOBT" There is probably no connection between a cobbkr, sometimes called t snob, and the Blang word "snob" used of a low fellow trying to push himself into the society of his bet ters. At the universities it used to be common to 8pea>. of a "nob," from nobilis Alius, a young nobleman or ?ometimes a college man. The letter "s" having a negative, or privative force, added to "nob," making thf word "snob," would thus mean a dis noble, or ignoble mere townsman, as rontrasted with the sons of colJijjea. >r gownsmen. Hence it crept iflro use as meaning anyone ignoble from iirth or breeding. HAD HIM THERE. "You say we people who indulge tn debate arc slow," said Mr. Long wood, with a grin. "Tliat is my opinion." "Well, you are Wrong. The Pan*? r\ a canal itself won't be open till 1916. Debate on the subject of has been wide open for some timeir" ?Washington Sunday Star. -< EXPLAINED. Gabe ? Jones is always In the hols. What's the mstter with him? Vev<>? He spends all hi* tiqaef \g castles in the air. \ BOTH PRENCH. \soe that ArUUy had \Corot. , Vou don't ssjrl Xia4 I f ^ \UnUm. . - k? JOKE FOR ONCt ON K. OF K. That Intuition for Which He It Famed Hu Been Known to Fall Britain'# Great Soldier. Here is a story of a rare oceairfon on which Lord Kitchener has given himself away. I-ortl K. hoji a great faculty by which he is able to size men up at a glauce. Shortly after L)c Wet fell like an avalanche on Lord Roberts' commu nications in tho South African war Lord K. was down the line fitting out extempore mounted infantry columns. A large number of de tails had been dumped down at Vre defort Road station. I /ml K. de termined to equip and tend them into the field at once. lie went to the waiting room to look for officers, and found a single man in occupa tion. lie was smart and well dressed and pleased Lord It's critical eye. "You will command a corps of mounted infantry I've just raised!'' said the general. "Very good, sir; what will my du ties be V "Don't you know your duties?" "My own ? yes, sir." "Then don't argue. What ii your regiment?" "Blankshires, sir." "What rank?" "Master tailor, sir!" Kitchener left hurriedly. RESULT THE SAME "Johnny, did you eat that apple?" "I only ate half of it, mamma.'' "What did you do with the other lalf ?'' "I ate i'aat first, mamma." BIO BEN'S TIME. A famous old clock is the one in she tower ot the British house of par jament at Westminster, whos? hours ire struck on the bell as ftBig Ben." It is an excellent time-keeper, as ras proved the other day when the Bntish Royal society vflited Green wich observatory and inxoaatad the record of the imperial parliamentary clock. The statistics showed* that >n 5 days there was an error of only one fifth of a second ; in 48 days the trror varied between ono*fifth and one-half of a second; in 83 days there was an error between half and one second, and in 91 days the error nras greater than one second. On one of the last-named days the error ex ceeded three seconds. With a record like that it is little wonder that Londoners swears by "Big Ben.'s" time. ONLY LOVE POSSIBLE. Mrs. Clarence n. Mackcy, at a jardon parly, praised the working girl. "How much nobler," she said, "to work than marry for money: I know a pretty girl who gave up a good po sition to marry a man of sixty-eight. " 'I am marrying for love/ she told her girl chum. "'And "the old fellow/ said the chum disgustedly, 'is worth seven millions 1' " 'Yes,' was tho reply, 'it's the seven millions I'm in lovo with.' " VOICES OF THE NIGHT, "Well? . . . No, this isn't a doctor's house. Central's given you the wrong number." "dec! Out of gasoline, tire punc tured, past mid-ight, and fifteen miles from home! Think you can walk it, Maria?" " 'Mandy, tell 'im it's time to go I You rausn't stay out on that porch any longer 1" "Shay, ofT'sher, I'm Bill Blinkunr' Wher-jd' I liver HOW IT WAS. Irate Father ? Ah-hl How i* it I catch you holding my .daughter in this fashion ? Answer me, tir ! How y .? .oung Man?Fine! Very fine, in. deed, sir! ? Puck. 5' - - ? -=5g ? STOMACH TRMIBII PDR nvt YEARS Majority of Friends Thought Mr. Hughes Would Die, Bat '* One Helped Him to Recovery. I'oineroyton, Ky.? In interesting vices iroin this pl<"ce, Mr. A. ]. flu writes as follows: "I was down with] stomach trouble (or live (5) years, wouiil have sick headache so bad, times, that I thought surely I would die.'] I tried different treatments, but tliejrl did not seem to do me any good. I got so bad, 1 could not eat or sle and all my friends, except one, thought would die. He advised me to Tlicdlord's lilack- Draught, and taking other mcdicines. J decided to take his advice, although I did not have any confidence in it I have now been taking Black- Draught tur three months, and it has cured me? haven't had those awful sick headaches since I began using it. I am so thankful for what Black Draught lias done for me." Thedford's. Black-Draught has been found a very valuable medicine for de rangements of the stomach and liver. It is composed of pure, vegetable herbs, contains no dangerous ingredients, and [4 els gently, yet surely. It can be Ireely used by young and old, and should bo kept in every family chest. i ; Get a package today. Only a quarter. ]4i Please send us a check for the S1.00 you owe Subscription. For the Road ?SEsrfl f%UR RAYO DRIVING Jtf LA3MP\is the most compact and efficient lighting de vice for all kinds Jbf vehicles. Will not blow out or jar out Equipped with thumb screws, ^ithat it is easily attached or deta^PE Throws a-clear light 200 feet ahead. Extra large red danger signal in back. It is equipped with handle, and when detached makes a good hand lantern. Strong. Durable. Will last for years. At Dealers Everywhere STANDARD OIL COMPANY kj&ssstvS:0- |< Norfolk. Va. f?T * YOU MUST SOW You might a* firming pay M try to til* bu?ln?u pay without arfvar In Your MULES PINE FOR OLD HOME ' Mlaaourl'a Prix* Product!, Transported to Minnesota, Feel Panga of Nos talgia and Hofu ee to Eat. Homesick for the corncrib with (lie open door and the old barn that { creaked when 1 lie wind blew, lone- ' lome for their lost master, two hi# . Missouri mules have been raising pandemonium in Hans Jensen's sta ble, while the polite are looking for Thomas Erickson, owner of the mules, says a Minneapolis (Minn.) dispatch to the New York Bun. Minnesota clover, hay, corn, oats, dandelions, new beet tops, onions and mint juleps have failed to ap pease the hunger of the homesick mules. Peter Jensen, Hans' son, burst into police headquarters at the court house and told the Btory. "I've fed those mules every thing that grows in Minnesota, and tried to make them drink a pail of mint juleps," slid Peter, "but they won't touch it. They're so lonesome they'll die un less the neigliWs, who have not been ?sleep since they arrived, take mat-, ters into their own hands." JUST A WAY THE GIRLS HAVE Of Court* She Wasn't tiolng to Marry "Him," but Thtro Was Another Chapter to Story. Once upon a time there vai a fel- | low and a girl. The fellow came a -culling. He meant busineaa. After | n while the friends of the girl be?an to twit her about him, asking her when it was going to be and ai 1 that. She replied. Among other thing? die said: ' _ . ? "Marry that pill ? I F><*> not "That, snippy little thing? for mine." . ? ?1 wouldn't marry him if he was j the last man on earth." "Oh, he's well enough in hi? way, but lie's not 'mf notion of a hus band." , . "I wish yon people would slop your nonsense. He's absolutely noth ing, to me." ? ' . , *1 guess you think I must bo pretty liard up to want to marry that." , .. Sequel: And did she ^tae^ently marry a pnneo? Not wactly. 81 married "thdt." They all do. THINKING l? a LO?T ART. A little hard thinking will supply tho place of a great deal of reading! md an hour or two spent in -hi. 1 manner sometimes lead you to eon fusions which It would require a vol nine to establish. The mind .dvance. in its train of thought, as a restive rolt proceeds on tlie road in which yon wish to guide him. He Is alwsya running to one side or the other, ?nd deviating from the proper path, to which it is your affair to bring him back. I have asked several men wlmt posses in their minds when they arc thinking ; and I never could find my man who could think for two minutes together. Everybody ha. ?ocincd to admit it was a perpcl'ial deviation from a particular path, ind a perpetual retnm to it ; which, imperfect as the operation is, is the jnly method in which we can operate with our minds 1 i carry on any pro ?ess of thought. - Sydney Smith. WILLIE WANTED TO KNOW. "Pa," said little .Willie, "what doe* '4^Astaw?,?repeated the old gentle- I man. "Why "^w means gone wrong, crooked. Why do yon ask f "Why, I notice that after jour name on all your letters they put E-9-Q, but I didn't know you d ivsr gone wrong or was crooked, pa. What did you do?" asked little Wil- | lit. ? Harper's Weokly. LUCKIER "How did you find tho roads up around Jinglerille Corner.?" uked Bilkins of Blathorsberry, vrho had , lust returned from a motor trip. "Oh, I wasn't particularly atucfc J on them," said Slathersberry. "Bcolly?" said Bilkin.. "Well. I , <me?s you'rs the only m.n that | wasn't. I was stuck on 'em for a whole day last year."? Harped | Weekly. IR HOTEL. Tint Quest? Tou don't meta to lay you don't like the ecenery around Mef you're the firmt iiian I ever heard eiprtss rock an extraordimry Second Queet ? Veil, didn't you 1 notice that the landlord was arcund when I said that? Think I w?t to | tT t m >r *ni bo at kut oiu "> lam b *ii and thai lj -jro fj u?o or.ly known to U? mcdlc.l upon the Moo<l " syetezn. '.ticro* ^a of tho dl. - it ttrtafth by :d aicUtlujf ? proprietors curatlvo ST IR ^^o'i'SuJSSS'WiSK & Mr oMir *? cur* AAArom r. ). CBBtmyA CO.. Tolctlo, Ckla, ?Sft??BK A.00' *"-> ?UU I^ku.XIm, Two Lots For Salt. One qext door to Mr. Watt Paiker's, 69 x 265 feet. Room (or two nouses. Also one small lot near Ed. Rollins on Marlboro road or Main direct. Cash or installment. Dr. James E. Patrick. NOTICE TO CREDITORS. Having qualified as Adminis trator of John Windham, deceas ed, late of Pitt County, North Carolina, this is to notify all per sons having claims aginst the estate of the said deceased to ex hibit them to the undersigned within twelve months from this date, or this notice will be plead ed in bar of their recovery. All persons indebted to said estate will please make imme diate pivmcnt. ,lt 1 his January 21st. 1914. ? B. M. LEWIS, Admr. F. G. James & Son, Attys. \ ?' Administratrix Notice, Moving qualified as Adminis tratrix of J. W. Moseley deccas ed late of Pitt County, N. C., this is to notify all persons having claims againft the estate of said deceased to exhibit them on or before Jan. the 12th, 1915, or this noticc will be pleaded in bar of their recovery. All persons indebted to Mid e&atc will make immediate pay ment. This January 12th, W14> Mrs. Sue Mose?ey, Admnc. of J. W. Moseley, deceased. j U 'ill. -i? U-L'--3e Pastime Theatre 3 Good Moving Pic tures every night Special Show Sat urday afternoon. Admission 10 c. .1 ? -n.u_-.i-: J * 1 - 1 . 'I For Life and Fire INSURANCE SEE i. A. MEW BORN at the BANK OF FARMVILLE,N.C. Agent tor National Life Insurance Co. of Monipeller, I ft., Eafna Fire, and other beat fire Insurance Compaahs. 9 v* r*-, . 1 1 uwjw am* .
The Farmville Enterprise (Farmville, N.C.)
Standardized title groups preceding, succeeding, and alternate titles together.
Feb. 19, 1914, edition 1
4
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