TRENCH A
I Orderly Jim Gets The Horse Laugh
j | BY OUK OWN RING W. LAKDNER
SJl well al yon must of got by this time so yon dont
/W l\ have no snpprlse In the sllteet wen 1 pnll new milllf
terry Iang witch yon havent never herd befoar. you
/ P I ced 1 was kldlng about the Detale but beleev me al
C their was never no kldlng about that as their wont be
about this lme going to tell you and you needent worry
f ) f) w J about my hiding al becaus it is strait stuff lme wrltelng
If you from hear altho lie admitt sum of it sounds a
- afffo r good deal like kiding.
> thats becaus their is so mutch diffronts between
,?t . Y the things you do in Slvfllain life and what you do in
' VTlX /Y\\ h"0*? an<1 their is beside a lot of diffronts in the
J( \j^J .J\ words you use for the things you do. that Detale 1
u Ik ^ told you about the kitchun polees iq 1 of them & ime
going to tell you about this other one this orderly
. witch isent orderly the same as you mean orderly back
home, orderly is keeping your shoes under the bed
I WtJr-^Sr 1 when they mite be on top of the dresser In Sivillain life.
I I hear In militerry life orderly is running a round for
I IrZ^fZyxA ?ome 1 elts becaus their Is so many fellas hear thats
I ihJfl officers and cant run so pryvats are called orderly
POTVATF JIM" when they do this.
vw?j ^ keeping Bhoes under the bed has nothink to do
with orderly hear it is inspeckshun. well al 1 day i was laying on my cott not
\ doing mutch but laying their and thinking about Aggie wen my name was
hollered out and I quit laying and jumpt up it was the sarjint & he has ben
soar at me ever sents i showed him up on the whistalling. 1 lernd about this
orderly bisnus thro this same sarjint as the 1 i lernd the whlstalls meaning
from, he ced to me after 1 Jumpt up from laying on my cott pryvat Jim you
> will plees be'orderly. whats the matter sarje i replide dont you think ime
orderly enugfi "allready come hear & take a slant at my cott and stuff, he
calld me a stiff or sumthing al but i dident hawl off and drive him 1 as per\
haps i should of you know me al. but he is a Sarjint and hitting a sarjint Is
? ? J- 41 -t-HV aa (uo monahnnnpd hAfnnr
V \ "iiDj w uu IIiau w gov a ncgu MIM.. mo oo. j !
ha8 moar Influents than a pryvats fist has so i cod well what do you want then.
h? ced y?u are want It as an orderly. I ced an orderly what, ime allways
orderly sarjint and he annsered back quick and snappy you are want It as an
orderly for the cornel he has heard you no sumthing about hoarses Is that;
true, well al I of droppt a couple remarks about playing the ponis or sumthing
but I of never ben on a hoarse or near 1 as a driver. It was a gralt
onor tho al the curnel was wanting to giv me so I dldent want to dis appoint
him aqd be side their isent nothing a bout a hoarse that cant be lernt by
any 1 with a littel brayuns in his dome.
1 told the sarjint sure ime an old hand at this hoarse stuff sarje ivei
ben as near as from me to" you to a hoarse offen & a friend of mine drives
a milk truk. well cut that stuff and com along he ced so 1 fell In behind the I
sarjint and we marcht out of the bar ux up to wear the stabuls is locait it i
TV. becing the orderly so tho sarjint told mo. well al they gave me two hoarses
over to the stabul 1 for me & 1 for the curnel. I notised mine lookt funny
with long ears and a tuff-looking tayul & I ced hadent you better give me
annother 1 this hoarse looks pretty hard & tuff for traveling a round with
a curnel on. they laffd & ced this is the hoarse every orderly rides on why
! , not you. 1 got on allright but my legs were too long for the stear ups so i
. C let them hang like youve soon in the movies al 1 must of lookd like alkilli
albert allright with my legs rappd around the hoarses belly, the fellas hol(: lered
you gnut what are you rldeing off without the curnels hoarse for cum
back & get it but it wasent ezy al. this hoarse 1 had drawn for beeing an
- ?r/inriv wM net on c-nintr inst l weieh it wodent turn around for nothing not
even kicks In the belly witch I gave It several of. instead of going back to |
???-v get the curnels hoarse it took me rite thro camp I wondered wha't are those
stiffs lafflng at wen soldgers wood look at me and Ian and holler.
finely this hoarse startlt to ran and all of. a sodden it dident ran no
, moar but stoppd when Borne 1 hollered halt only the hoarse dident even do
one two so i could get ready for It halting, natcherly 1 couldent halt so
quick and went over the haorses head liteing on ray own witch is a hard 1
-fiSvL' an<* did?11* be come dented nor nothing, went I lookd up the hoarse 1 had
Kytf-p ben on was going down the road & I hollered hoe their hoarse whats the
i&iv,; matter & a boob standing by sed dont you no thats not a hoarse but a mule
haw haw haw. 1 ced by your laff 1 shood think your related to him haw haw
& yourself, you dont no Ime the curnels orderly 1 ced & he shut np but 1 dident
see no moar of the curnel that day. Your friend PRIVATE JIM.
m-.
CARRY ON
Ifs easy to fight when everything's right,
gfe;/ And you're mad with the thrill and the glory;
fe It's easy to cheer when mctory's near,
Srjjp'" . And you wallow in fields that are gory.
It's a different song when everything's wrong/
When xou're feeling infernally mortal;
When it's ten against one, and hope there is none,
Buck up, little soldier, and chortle:
P Carry on/ Carry on! There isn't much punch in your blow.
You're glaring and staring and hitting out blind;
You're muddy and bloody, but never you mind,
Carry on! Carry on f You haven't the ghost of a show.
It's looking Hke death, but while you've a breath,
Carry on, my son! Carry on I
And so in the strife of the battle of life
It's easy to fight when you're winning;
3?Y Ifs easy fo dove, and starve and be brave.
When the dawn of success is beginning.
But the man who can meet despair and defeat
With a cheer, there's the man of God's choosing;
The man who can fight to Heaven's own height
Is the man ,who can fight when he's losing.
Carry onI Carry onI Things never were looming so black;
But show that you havetft a cowardly streak,
ScT-i . And though you're unlucky you never are weak.
Carry onI Carry on/ Brace up for another attack.
Ifs looking like hell, but?you never can tell;
Pj?V: Carry on, old maul Carry onL
There are some who drift out in the deserts of doubt.
And some who in brutishness wallow;
Iffi'- 't-'r; There are others I know, who in piety go.
Because of a Heaven to follow.
But to labor with zest, and to give of your best,
For the sweetness and joy of the giving;
To help folks along with a hand and a song?
Why, there's the real sunshine of living.
Carry on I Carry on! Fight the good fight and true.
Believe in your mission, greet life with a cheer;
There's big work to do, and that's why you are here.
Carry on! Carry on! Let the world be better for you;
-f[ltt&ivsi And at last when you die, let this be your cry:
v'-iV Carry on, my tool! Carry on!
* Robert W. Service.
lND camp
AMERICANS A
Red Triangle Man Who Aceomps
Trenches Writes Intimately <
Somewhere In Prance.
When our American troops started
for the front, we fed them every four
hours for forty-eight hours. They
came In cold and tired and thirsty.
We had six hundred loaves of bread
for them, twelve cases of Jam with
twenty-four cans in a case, and three
hundred pounds of coffee. We had
t^o cheeses, weighing one hundred
and eighty pounds each. We took a
lncntlnn on the nnav. Bet UO stoves, a
boiler and served real American coffee.
We gave the cofTee away. For
sandwiches we charged twenty-five
centimes. They cost us thirty-flye
centimes. I went thirty-Bix hours on
four slices of bread and coffee.
Then I started off with the men?
artillery, they wece. We left at 8
p. m. on a Friday. Twenty-nine of
us were in a box-car with a bale of
hay. When the wire came off the hay
we- needed a gas mask for the dust
that shook out. There wasn't room
for all to sleep. We were-saddlers,
shoers, mechanics, the ninth section
of a battery.
W? woke to a foggy morning. The
men thought they were on' the way
to Paris. But we had come to the
city of ?;?, in a corner of France.
We took the guns off the wagon, and
, marched seventeen kilometers to the
town of . We slept that night
In the loft of a barn. Men had been
billeted there before us, and by morning
I had a ring of white welts
around my ankle from vermin. We
lived there for three days with those
! visitors that didn't appear on the roll
call, and for nine days we never took |
our clothes off.
Horses Kat Anything
The boys were advised to slip off
their revolvers. We rented a kitchen
as a store-room for the guns. In
renting that kitchen, I wore out my
twenty-words of French, but we got
the kitchen and we slept there In the
room with the guns. We stayed five
days in the place with the main horse
line of the battery. The horses had
large appetites and ate up caissons
and any amount of leather stuff. One
man came In and reported with his
overcoat In rags. He said he was
sorry, but his horse had got hungry
in the night.
I thought I would go further up,
so I got i horse. He was thin, I give
you that for background, so you will
be sympathetic to my next. The ori
tiers were to ride bareback, and I had
to ride him bareback razorback. For
the next two days I* ate my meals
| standing up.
Then I went to the brigade onmmander
and he let me go to the front.
We came to the first village this side
! of the border. It was full up of men
billeted. I said I was tired enough
to give seven francs for a bed. An
old woman gave me a room in a house
, with the end blown off. She was
caretaker. The family had fled. She
seemed to feel this way about it?
'I'm about at the end of the line
anyhow, and I'll stay by the stuff."
Two colonels walked me up to the
dugouts, and that was where I parted
| friendship with my long overcoat. It
slapped mud every step.
Thirty men were in the dugout in
fetid air. The Germans were one
hundred yards away. In between
looked like a lot of country anywhere.
Shells were coming In casually,
landing in a field about one
hundred yards away. When we came
ho/>ir oinne the communication trench
we found the ceiling of It shot
through with a shell.
All Retire Early
Then I went to find our batteryOut
along an old Roman road we
came to a farmhouse located where
ta wise farmer would place it. The
house was in ruins. All through this
section men had been burled where
they fell, batteries were dug in on the
hillside, and soldiers were billeted In
the ruins of villages. The fields
around the farmhouse were shell-pitted.
The Germans threw in one more
shell at the house and killed two |
cooks and an assistant. Somewhere
along the road a battery was dug in
on the Toadslde. We saw gun-pits
and then nine-foot dugouts and then
more gun-pjis. laere wao viijv-tvouwire
with grass tied in for camou- ,
flags, a, wooded hill and a maze of
barbed wire. I went into the mess ,
kitchen for American soldiers, got the
loan of a mess-kit, and had prunes,
potatoes, meat and bread. I slept on
the mountain-side in my half of a pup
tent, with my head cupped in a
trench shovel. We went to bed at
6.16 p. m. Life Is blank after the
active hours.
In the morning we dug emplace- >
menta for the guns. We were supposed
to wait till the four gqns were i
dug in. But when the first gun was i
nested, the boys couldn't wait to get t
T THE FRONT EH
inied Khaki-Clad Fighters to the
af What He Saw and Heard ?|
the rest ready. They had to let the |jl III |]|
RorhpR knnw Ihpv hnrl rnmp At. 4 IH U I RII
p. m. on October 24. they sent the JI I |||J
first shell fired by an American bat- 11 (|| |t|n tery
from an American-dug emplace- III W IflH
ment. It was Battery of the Ifil I JjJJ
Field Artillery.
"Here's the first shot we're hand- c??e?
ing to the Germans," they said, and
they all agreed it had to kill at least
thirty-six men.
One man said our aim was bad. Wf
"In about fifteen minntes," he lu I / |KoJI
claimed, "you'll see a German pop up ]M\ |lM v v
over the hill, asking, "did we throw 32 I U 1 jlll
them something?" U J Ufl
We sent four shrapnel for range, |jk&L4| Jn
and took the distance at six thousand MTv^lKfyl
"Minus five to the left, same range, JLJJLJgMW *"
same elevation," came back on the H H
telephone, and then: DrAB U
"She's on her way." JBAM
They gt^ve Tne the case of the first II ffl
shell. I carried it on my belt, where (||_|ltfl(l frl
it kept rubbing the spine. The boys
fired five ronnds before supper. They nl .Ijl mj yB
used French 8eventy-flves. UTm JBfljl
"Mark all your data and go home,"
was the order, and they chalked the JR
gun shield. UpjafTfn ill
Case Sent to President WBjJjj|jj|
Another battery fired sooner than I
we did, but not from an American- I VIB
dug emplacement. They flred from
an orchard. The case of that shell bj||JmPL
went to President Wilson. JI n 11 ll |
The purpose of my trip was obser- kwnv
vatlon and laying out an organization C/UJO
for Red Triangle work. So I went
with a papodhe containing a tooth- Pvf ">/
brush, socks and underwear. But 1 m
managed to smuggle in writing paper I
and games. IB,
I came back by mule team, walked Bk>J ;
to , flagged a Ford for the Beven- IJ VtyKi
teen kilometers to? ?, and so down I yr/\
to Paris. MSyfi
While we were at the front, the yijl f
soldiers spent their spare time in get- fciffiitfr
ting up a good American meal In
their minds?beefsteak, peas and H 1[ HI
crisp celery. Some of the fellows Ly
slept in old dugouts, but most pre- jflwil
ferred pup tents. They liked the ex Hi
perience. V UJfrnl
"This is Jake," they said. {jj
For Red Triangle work with them
we are using two Fords, a motor- 1 fflv
cycle and a truck. In the base towns H flHr
we are putting a double-walled tent JfcsSj
and a Are, so they will have a warm njl
place to sit and write. We shall sell H m] fflj
them socks, chocolate, malted milk I ^ |K
and coffee. For our men at the front m WH HI II
we will carry stuff in a Ford as far as
we can get and then go the rest of n I
the way to the emplacement on foot, la B? Hi M
We are starting work with five Red fly I
Triangle men. We shall visit the out- inff "III
post dressing stations and bring them mi ft
magazines. Henry Crane, the nephew |
of the Rev. Frank Crane, the son of iMtfwgll
Robert Speer, and Shaw, the old IrvjKJRjM
Columbia center-rush, are three of mjKwtifl]
the men working at the front. p&mJfdl
This experience in the trenches I '
has meant a lot to two armies. It I
has cheered up the French, and it has WSifyj J
solemnized our men. IVJt/'- J
HAIG
Y/y who've done artistic lighting.
* " but Haig, who's won. again. ' ?r r?.
again, is unknown at this writing. /ra?|g2p
He doesn't hand our iiaigish news j"'"SW
to eager-eyed reporters, nor yet submit
to interviews which might be
called rip-snorters. He doesn't hunt PJimf-JPA
the "feature" gent, or leave his post raYj |w|
forsaken, to face a kodak in a tent pw | V, |
and have his picture taken. I know 7 1 4'
not if he's short or tall. I've never \i VI. (
seen his photo; but whether he is \
large or small, he's getting William's ^
goat, oh! Some colonels view the V ;
hall of fame and think it El Dorado . V .-J
but he who plays the mighty game * /
is always in the shadow, i know
not how he wears his beard, or who
may be his tailor, but more and more BjjSfl
hia BfrnL-pc * ffr> re/1 anrl Wilhplm'ti
growing paler. I've seen no pictures
of his wife, or of his sons and daughtera,
or of his ancient home in Fife,
beside some storied waters. The
grand stand looks for him in vain.
no gallery has known him. but when
the Prussians plant their slain, they
cuss blm and bemoan him. With him
there's no such word as can't, no ob- |P>(r
stacles affrighting; great man! like BaffleMaa
our own silent Grant, he fights and III' /I 1
keeps on fighting.
?Walt Mason. Ifl I I D
(Copyright. 1917. by Geo. Matthew Adi?ni?t IRI H
THEY WANT TO KNOW | |
Every soldier reads Trench and |||| 11
Camp to find out what's going on. I IBB
what has gone on and what is going III |g| *
to be going on in camp. The folks ||| | | IUD
it home want to know, too. Send
his paper to them. uBuRLJ