mTME BARRACKS WHEEZE" By lit-Clan Private CHET 8HAFRJR (American Kxpeditiouary Force, ^ Somewhere In Fra?ee> l^r IWT^ Lose interest. My IiW 4 Immediatclv, f/i il\ / ?h "" '/{ | 11 l<st of Iff 1 Legal holidays I 'A Printed in U ?1 The Back U w' Of your ! I l>tar\ of Vsef'ul I aJ Information. jdSmmm shipboard Mime can't even hold balance. H'hen one of the officers was afflicted and made his run to the rail a private, I f quartered forward, remarked: "That's \ the first square meat I've seen since /1 Tearing down his pack and spreadf&EiBHBm 'nK out (bc contents of the roll, Chalhe pencilled a sign and pinned it on: fyK??jR|3K "At The Sign Of The Shelter Tent." T AND IT WASN'T VERY IX) N (J BEf *"ORE HIS IXX WAS CROWDED. BEFORE ?" II 'HEN HE GET AFTER -- "HUES HE GET BACK." After ten days of sailing the commander of the company announced the hours in which the soldiers could wash their clothes. There were none Mon board who took the dare, according to the purser's figures. _ Ralph said he hoped he'd get a chance ? a, to go to London or I'aris because he\ _ linew a lot of strangers there. j0? y-0~ Euphemius trotte<l In all covered ? - ? * with i>erspiration and a hammock and said he wasn't going to lose any '7^ sleep over the submarine If he could find a place to sleep. ZMrmftStw o I loo: criming rujers were needed. it ir. is no\r. avtomaticIf you can't smile, show your teeth. * ou might fool a few, at least. -A VI) IF YOl' .MIST FROWN, ill MzJppU MAKK IT A PURELY PRIVATE jlhlgSnp/ MATTER. Some smile so infrequently, that. WV2 when they do. everybody remarks MMf o'onut the new dandelion in the U S One infantryman said he would Ik* WA ? < F< I m, ilw. ?nrl<l of nn.i. after he landed that the war \ft would he over before he could get U Hr,,IV,d to his quota of (iermans. vlSr ^\^8 "\o. aiv son." said the veteran. f>at\\y\'i"</ his offspring's curly head. "There J?"V 'cere no officers icho neglected to puriB fl* chase Sant Brawn belts before they 7l-& / \*|\3f :i\ 1 ho "Kest i'amp" rumor is the best V.'1* ?!,? ?n '',P ^?at* . ^\V " .led the mess room orderlies, passing , } ' r ' "l'"1" ,nc wearing decks | ** 'citlt 'heir pans of bully beef, were the\ I 1. . | (f ' V^'i1?' only ones on board u ho did not need ' r"";^ ? L ' j When the gangplank is swung into > position you'll know what you were looking for all along the way and . ... j couldn't just place. At b\ r. /*?*/! yo:i r,*f dozi~.i the foot and ' ./ /, /.? -r a bit and you bobble J c tt' >und ,r'rttly and look o~cr a lot '/ A cuf'ar faces end buildings you'll \ VWu?$L r.-:rarh. '? ' 0'trsclf, ttiV/. "THIS ISN'T sri'H A VERY I yimb-: STRANGE im.ACE AFTER AM.." V my . 'U1H ilyl ll-MENT KOR VlEI.I) ARTIM ' I.ERA* REGIMENTS li is directed bv tsn v >jjf t'.'.cnt thai hereafter the entire person* :iel of the field regiments. except *>\ 3 chaplains and members of the Med/j ?j " ral Department attached, will be : nied with a pistol. Rifles will no ? y lo :sr be part of the equipment for ( ., 'V * Field Artillery regiments. Eight ,y\\. automatic rifle3 will be furnished to each battery, headquarters company \ s.nd supply company of Field Artillery regiments. No additional personnel sill be allotted for these automatic rifles. AH rifles now in possesion of ? '?I" Artillery regiments shall b? turned in at'once to the nearest ordi:.iii ? depot. Tat es of Organization affected by this change of equipment . hanged to conform therewith. 0 .... N f|,j ||j Y\ One of the minor annoyances ol American army life in France, tc which letters from the front give special prominence, is the restrictions which the War Departnient has pul on packages for the soldiers of the American Expeditionary forces. The fighting men are not particularly interested in the details of handling army mail; they only know-that the i?U3 Ittl UIUCI aIA/UV ocuuiug |>BVBBbVU to the front eliminates the little periodical surprises .that gave them one of their greatest pleasures last year and provided a highly appreciated compensation for the hardships and dangers of fighting in a foreign land. Therefore, the boys on the other side resent the order and discuss it as an utterly unjust curtailment of their rights. Although *War Department officials, a majority of whom have sons or close relatives in Prance, sympathize keenly with the soldiers' complaints about the curtailment on packages, they know that a modification of the ord^r is out of the question. Nevertheless, realizing that the men at the front are extraordinarily patient under hardships that cannot be overcome, they are making every effort to present the reasons for the order to the individual fight| ing men, so that they may appreciate the conditions that inspired a ban on bulky mail. If each soldier in the American overseas forces should receive a 5I pound package from home once a i month, the postal forces in Prance would be compelled to handle more than 5.000 net tons of parcel post material in addition to the heavy i id "CiCLU+IMte- P( LJkJ \ IUH ' 3 V (rUM ? (a)e Von'fc, much- Discomfort We suffer- hob. -hrmj (?oi "cner. Here". . Just I MAKE if 4ioTTon. ff?6 KA I *v 4M2W VP I (uiTH Hf' 'U?xr tftocs [ ' / s ;-j. Oix1 Packages Mail [ mall distribution that is now taxing i the authorities to the extreme limits ot their resources. The dumping of this additional 6,000 tons a month 1 on the service would bend the mili: tar; mall delivery system far past the i breaking point and letters, which are far more important tQ the happiness ot the soldiers than candy, cigarettes or books from, home, would be hope; lessly delayed, and possibly not de, livered until many months after their arrival in France. ' Tbe handling of 6,000 tonsot pack ages would require the exclusive use f of four fair-sized cargo boats per month. A deduction of this cargo space from the transportation system between the United States and France would seriously, affect the steady flow or food and. munitions to the frost. ' The volume of material represented 1 by 5,000 net tons is sufficient to maintain In France more than bIA additional regiments of infantry, completely equipped and ready for ffghtI ing. The immense organization, of men, equipment and vehicles required to handle the parcel post mail in .American cities with populations that exAN INEFFECTUAL WEAPON The Commanding Officer was inspecting a company of his depot. Coming to one man whose face was rather unkempt, he remarked: i "Have you shaved thid morning?" "Yea, sir," was the prompt response. r , The C. O. looked dubious, and after consulting two or three officers, . again questioned the accused with: i "What did you use, a penknife?" "No, sir," came the answer. "X lost my penknife and'tried an army razor. ?Judge. I =LLefcs iR?-^OuJ -HAVC TO D (TffelS 3o we <3*?4 - jAv ?*??*. " y. ^7 eeed two million Inhabitant! la BflP iar to eroryone. As a matter ot fa New Tork aid Chicago are the.MML . cities In this country which, ntwBE-yya ding to cenans reports, have passed"? the two-million populatlon.mafk.. affillSvl army of two million men Is. from the / ' postaL authorities' point of viet^apV yery much bigger community, becauw It Is composed entirely of adutte ahd every man receires mail. JJoreover this "population" la not groupedddf^M city of paved streets and permanhjMfflft addresses. It is scattered throughout I {Vance In towns, large and small)" aajfc'-'A fields and woods and trenches. Its f units are contfnually shifting and wr permanent address for a soldier is ay obrloua impossibility. Under sue/ ,?J| circumstances, the distribution of ser ersl million parcel post packages each moniu wouiu require a b?u; ivj,y moos number of men end vehteteMffi ThlB organisation, of course, would jC. have to be deducted'from the etren^h&jj of General Psrehlng'a fighting force*. Army authorities 'In France are making erery effort to eecure regular*?! and prompt; handling of flrst-ctaatt? mall. This Is an enormous probleini|Btj|)j9 Itself and Is tar. .more Important t American soldiers' and their famlUetsaVd than a delivery of packages from J home. The War Department Is pro- ;jf>' vlding better food and clothing to theyt men In France fhan they could buy in': tY< the United States. The QaartermM*K|? ter Corps is now making cigarettes f. and candy regular features of the,;/Tb dally rations. One thing for which / ' the army cannot provide satisfactory ' ' snbstltate8 is letters from loved ones '/ at home. For that reason, the re/ strlctlon on packages will be contlr ued until the postal authorities I France are able to handle them wttt-f out Imperiling the delivery of Aiwu .. class mall to the American soldiers, 'nfljja ^hbh - ?afcji *fo

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