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1 1 KlHPr fVlP CI 1 n THE BRUNSWICKfeBtACON JJ ^Honor ? ' Page 4
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Volunteers , Pa
Goes Both Ways
tients, Family All Benefit From Hospice Experience
BY LYNN CARLSON
Helen Jaynes is as pretty as a picture.
Her white hair has been coiffed by a
hairdresser this day. She has rosy
cheeks, a porcelain complexion and twin
kling blue eyes. She wears stylish chestnut
colored slacks and sweater with a turtleneck
and gold hoop earrings.
As she talks about her favorite pastime ?
shopping ? she becomes as animated as a
teenage girl. "I like to go look, even if I
don't buy anything. I love to go to every part
of the store. I just like to keep up with the
styles. My idea of heaven is racks and racks
She is feeling as good as she looks to
day ? she beams when she says so. It's diffi
cult for her visitor to conceive of the fact
that this adorable senior fashionplate has
congestive heart failure. That her heart can't
expel sufficient blood to keep up with her
body's metabolism. That she won't recover
Helen is one of the 30 or so Brunswick
County patients of Lower Cape Fear
Hospice. Hospice care makes it possible for
her to remain in her comfortable Brierwood
condominium, close by her daughter and
son-in-law, Mr. tnd Mrs. Arthur Clawson,
and her granddaughter and grandson-in-law.
Dr. and Mrs. Samuel Kirtley. Hospice takes
care of the details of getting oxygen and a
hospital bed and deals with the avalanche of
paperwork involved with care of a terminal
But most importantly for Helen and her
family, Hospice provides Heni Moulton.
Heni is a registered nurse who retired to
Sea Trail from New Jersey and became a
Hospice volunteer because she "just missed
being involved." She spends two to four
hours a week with Helen Jaynes. "We sit
and chat, or just look quietly" out Helen's
sliding glass windows overlooking
Brierwood golf course. "I bring her lots of
The Hospice volunteer's work is as much
for the patient's family as for the patient her
self, Heni adds, getting a nod from Helen's
daughter Norma Clawson.
"She's just somebody we can rely on to
help us through this, to give us time off to
take care of other things," Norma says. "It's
a lot of moral and emotional support. We
feel we have someone to call, and we can
depend on things, and schedule according
In addition to Heni. Norma can rely on a
Hospice nurse coming by a couple of times
a week to check her mother's blood pres
sure, and a certified nursing assistant com
ing by to help Helen get bathed and dressed.
Lower Cape Fear Hospice currently has
205 volunteers who work with nurses, ad
ministrators, social workers and bereave
ment counselors in Brunswick County in an
intensive effort to care for about 30 termi
nally ill patients under its care here, said,
Laney Blanton, volunteer coordinator and
community relations director.
Only about 55 are involved in patient
care. Others are invaluable in helping with
every other facet of keeping the program go
ing. "When people want to volunteer for us,
we find a place to best use whatever talents
they bring to the organization," Blanton ex
plains. "Everyone can't do patient care."
And those who do patient care don't nec
HELEN JAYNES (left) and Heni Moult on in Helen 's backyard at Brieruood.
STAFF PHOTO BY IYNN CARLSON
essarily need a background in medicine like
Heni has. "We have some great volunteers
who are just moms," Blanton adds.
Heni says volunteering gives her an outlet
as well as an opportunity to really feel a part
of Brunswick County, despite being a rela
"You meet interesting people and all their
family members. You are intimately in
volved with the recipients of Hospice care.
You give the family an outlet, too ? you are
not a relative, and they're not paying you to
be there. The recipient and the family can
say things to you they can't say to anyone
All patient-to-volunteer and family-to
volunteer communication is confidential,
Laney Blanton adds.
Norma adds, "When someone in the fami
ly is ill, and there are family members living
far away, you try to shield them from things,
even though you have things on your mind
you need to say. You can't get on the phone
and dump on your family."
Hospice volunteers help families deal
with the roller coaster of emotions accompa
nying the care, and ultimately the loss, of a
terminally ill loved one. Norma has been
with Helen through a heart attack, stroke
and the recuperative periods. When her
feisty mother is feeling good, Norma is still
apprehensive because Helen tends to be
come "too independent, too active." Even
the good times can be stressful.
The issues are different with every pa
tient, Heni adds, so a part of being a good
volunteer is being perceptive ? hearing what
is not said as well as what is.
"Usually, 1 have dealt with patients who
Love Light Tree
At Seaside Will
A "Love Light" tree sponsored by
Brunswick County volunteers of Lower
Cape Fear Hospice offers a special way
to share the beauty of the holidays.
This year, the tree will be placed at the
corner of N.C. 904 and N.C. 179 at
"There are a lot of people in this area
who need to be educated about Lower
Cape Fear Hospice and its work," said
Jill Hope, project coordinator.
Each light on the tree may be spon
sored in honor of, or in memory of some
one. Lights on the star that tops the tree
may be sponsored for $25 each. A mail
in form appears elsewhere in this issue of
The Brunswick Beacon. The contribu
tions are tax-deductible and will be ac
cepted throughout the holiday season.
Names of those honored are placed in
a "Book of Honor," which will be dis
played in the lobby of Century 21 Sunset
Realty, whose staff is coordinating the
project, starting Dec. 1, when the tree
will be lighted, and continuing through
At 6:30 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 16,
Lower Cape Fear Hospice volunteers
will hold a candle-lighting ceremony at
the tree. The Rev. Jerry Lowry, pastor of
Seaside United Methodist Church, will
read the names from the Book of Honor
and lead a brief program.
Proceeds of the Love Light Tree wil!
help support Lower Cape Fear Hospice
Inc.'s work in Brunswick County. The
not-for-profit agency provides medical
ly-directed care intended to improve
quality of life for the terminally ill and
their families, by alleviating pain and
helping meet their special physical, emo
tional, social and spiritual needs.
For more information contact Jill
Hope or Virginia Loester at 579-1000 or
Ixjwer Cape Fear Hospice, 754-5356.
had living spouses who need the relief of
talking about things when their loved one is
close to death. If it's the wife who's ill, the
men have a hard time explaining it to them
selves. It's good for them to be able to sit
eyeball to eyeball with another woman and
talk about, for instance, what his wife will
wear for her burial."
It must be so hard, so sad, the visitor re
"The first one is the hardest." Heni says.
"You get more at ease."
As emotionally difficult as it can lie,
Blanton adds, "you get more out of it than
the family or the patient. When I'm having a
bad day and things aren't going like I think
they should, I just stop and go see patients."
Heni Moulton agrees, smiling warmly at
her friend Helen Jaynes. "If you want to
have some say in your community, you have
to give something to ii. If you want to make
some noise, you'd better be where someone
can hear you."
November is National Hospice Month.
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