Q - L 1 V I N G
Tell Trinity
by Trinity
Will coming out stop your life
or start it
Dear Trinity,
About a month ago I came out to my wife,
two kids and to my very straight job. My wife
was great, but my job couldn’t handle it so I was
fired. Did I do the right thing?
Ouch, I’m Out, Ottawa, Canada
Dear Ouch,
Being yourself, freeing yourself, saying who
you are and surrounding yourself with sup
portive people — even if it means changing
jobs, neighborhoods or family situations —
will always be the greatest and holiest gift you
can give yourself and the world around you.
Yes, honey, you did a great thing.
Dear Trinity,
I’m gay, live in a small town and have trouble
meeting dates. The population is 2,000. Any
ideas on how to survive not so alone?
Population Troubles, Provincetown, Mass.
Dear Population Troubles,
Honestly, the best way to find a date in a
small town is to move out. Bigger cities mean
bigger dating opportunities. Sorry, sweetie, but
if finding a relationship is your priority, mov
ing out may have to
become your reality. I did
it and my dating life,
amongst many other
things, soared.
Hey Trinity,
How do I meet more
people when I only go out once in a while?
Trapped At Home, Nashville, Tenn.
Hey Trapped,
On those rare nights when you do go out,
make sure to look overly attractive and talk to
as many people as you can. Don’t waste these
rare outings. The more people you get the
attention of and talk to the better your
Trinity and the Numbers Game
chances are. Meeting people is a numbers
game, pumpkin, so play it big!
Dearest Trinity,
Last week I made a date with the bouncer of
a bar I frequent. But he got excited and told
people, which “weirded” me out, so I never
showed up. Now he won’t let me in the bar. I
apologized, but he says I’m not welcome. What
should I do?
Stood Up/Kicked Out, Minneapolis, Minn.
Dearest SU/KO,
1 know you’d like me to say he should for
give you and let you in, but what were you
thinking when you stood him up? Don’t you
know how evil and inhumane it is to stand
■ someone up! Listen, baby, send flowers, an
apology card and keep trying, but more
importantly read:
Trinity’s Disastrous Tips For
What You Did To Someone
When You Stood Them Up
1. You made him leave work early, clean his
apartment and get all dressed up just to
spend the evening feeling confused,
distrusting and dirty.
2. You got her all worked up for a good date
just to waste a good night working on a
good cry.
3. You made him cook a fancy dinner and
open an expensive bottle of wine just to
watch the wine age and the food get
moldy.
4. You made her pace the floor, stare at the
clock and check her voicemail endlessly
hoping that she didn’t meet another
loser.
5. You made him lay painfully on the couch
wondering,“Did I say something wrong?”
“Did I get the time right?” Or, “Am I going
to be alone forever?”
6. You made her call friends, family and 1-
900-4-C-R-I-S-I-S to get help and support
for issues she hasn’t dealt with since 10th
grade.
7. You made him wish angry, unhealthy and
negative things about you and maybe him
self, plus you ruined, once again, someone’s
dream of a relationship.
8. You made her obsess about love, honesty,
time and life — need I go on.
9. You set him up with all your promises just
to let him down with all your narcissistic,
egotistical and arrogant behavior.
10. Lastly, you made her wait alone, at a bar,
a restaurant or at home like a prisoner, a
victim or a punished criminal when all
she wanted to do was to get to know you
better. I
Don’t let your questions go unanswered!
— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity
was host of Spiritually Speaking a weekly radio
drama, and now performs globally.
info: Trinity@telltrinity.com .www.telltrinity.com
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JULY 29.2006‘Q-NOTES 41