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Tell Trinity
by Trinity . Contributing Writer
How to play *the game’ of
picking up someone
Dearest Trinity,
I’m an honest, hard working, well-rounded
guy with lots to offer. But, I have a terrible fear of
going over and talking to someone I’m interested
in. Isn’t there an easier way to play “the game?”
Stalemate, Wichita, Kansas
Dearest Stalemate,
The “pick up” game is truly all about one
thing, fear (or love) of rejection, which can
destroy (or embrace) this first act of talking to
a cute, sexy, hunky.. .well, stranger. However,
you must remember: a) rejection is only a psy
chological concept and not physically real and
b) approaching someone must be treated like
playing “The Rejection Game.” In other words
make believe you’re practicing “getting reject
ed” rather than neurotically needing to “get
accepted.” Once you master “The Rejection
Game” you’ll figure out that rejection (or
acceptance) has nothing to do with you, but
rather someone’s own selfish and simple fan
tasies. Sometimes you’ll be ignored, sometimes
abhorred and at other times adored, though,
pumpkin, eventually you must become the
master of your own game, not a slave to some
other fool’s fear of being rejected first.
Hello Trinity,
I mean, really, do I have to be ashamed of my
excessive promiscuity? bn’t there enough shame
in the world? Can’t I just be a shameless slut?
Slut Pride, Provincetown, Mass.
Trinity's Promiscuous Past
Hello Slut Pride,
Just for the record, shame is lack of self-
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love and excessive promiscuity
is often related to an excessive
lack of not being touched. Now
with that said, I must ask, when
you’re a “shameless slut” are you
loveless and touchless or full of
love, passion and compassion?
Being a slut, sweetie, is nothing to be too
ashamed of unless, of course, you do it
shamelessly. (My cartoon can show you all
about this dilemma.)
Dearest Trinity,
I’m seeing a guy who “only wants sex not a
date.” Is it OK to just have a “sex-date” or “sex-
mate” and also date on the side?
Sex Date, Baton Rouge, La.
Dearest Sex Date,
It’s great to get “it” and even greater if it’s
on a regular basis. Yet, if he has no interest in
offering you a future, then absolutely get out
and date with fury. Yes, keep him for fun, yet
don’t get lazy because of him, remember keep
dating. Seriously, honey, until you find Mr.
DreamDate, it’s healthy and acceptable to have
someone to fall back on.. .or under!
Dear Trinity,
Gay marriage is much harder than I imag
ined. I want to keep my commitment vows, but it
seems to be a constant uphill climb?
Keeping Your Vows, Stanford, Ct.
Dear KY Vows,
Commitment to anyone or anything
means work, work and more work. But, dar
ling, to keep it more fulfilling try:
Trinity’s Smooth Tips For Keeping
Your Marriage/Commitment Vows
1. Beingseljish means trouble. Stop it,grow
up and realize you’re not single anymore.
2. Being righteous or stubborn means taking
the joy out of a relationship. Why not say,
“yes” as often as possible.
3. Getting outside help with cooking, cleaning
or organizing means you’ll both be free
from fighting about these things.
4. Second guessing means trying to fulfill
unspoken needs. It doesn’t mean psycho
logically beating your spouse up for not
being physic.
5. Listening to someone’s problems means
making time to listen even when you don’t
want to and sometimes even getting pro
fessional help.
Yet...
6. Sharing does not mean constandy talking
about every litde problem, worry or secret
you have.
7. Having integrity means being a person of
your word and taking responsibility for
your actions.
However...
8. Love often means having to say, “I’m
sorry!” even when you’re not.
9. Letting go of “the htde things” means
you’ll have a much happier life enjoying
bigger things.
10. Lasdy,fighting does not mean “It’s over.” It
means, “Go away for now and when I’m
ready we’ll make up.” I
— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity
was host of “Spiritually Speaking” a weekly
radio drama, and now performs globally.
info: www.telltrinity.com . Trinity@telltrinity.com
Tel Trinity, P.O. Box 23861 . Ft Lauderdale, FL 33307
Sponsored by. Provincetown Business Guild
800-637-8696 . www.ptown.org
24 MAY 30.2009-ONotes