on being a gay parent by brett webb-mitchell :: qnotes contributor The Insurance Game Here's the situation: I have healthcare insurance, that in cludes dental, death, disability and part of my retirement plan, through my employer's comprehensive. This program covers my two children and me. My partner has his health insurance program and retire ment program through the state of North Carolina because he is an employee of the state. Because of the rules of the insurance game we are not considered a couple, or a family, even though in all reality we are very much a family, with kids and dogs in tow, in every respect that a heterosexual couple is. So our healthcare benefits are double what other couples pay for who are either heterosexuals and married, or are fortunate to work in a place where there are same-sex health benefits. Here's where it gets even more interesting: my partner, who works at a state institution of higher education, is re sponsible for signing off on any graduate student in a same-sex partnered relationship who is then able to procure same-sex benefits for his or her partners. The irony is he cannot get ^ the same benefits for us as a couple as a state employee. Now this is where it gets tricky and becomes a matter of injustice: we have friends who are both employees of the state, working in the same institu tion of higher education. They are in a same-sex marriage, • having been wed in the state of Massachusetts. However, this marriage is not recognized in North Carolina. One of the women, who recently had a child through in-vitro fertilization, recently had a flare up her multiple sclerosis (MS) because of the pregnancy and healthy birth of a child. Because of the MS flare-up she has gone on a health-related or sick leave of absence. However, doing so means she no longer has health insurance for her orthe baby. And, her partner's insurance coverage does not cover her married-partner or the child that she is also a parent to because the child is — in the state of North Carolina — a dependent upon the single mother (who really isn't a single mother) who is now on sick leave. Is this crazy or what? And, the current federal reform of healthcare does not touch the commonality of this situation. I know of other same-sex partners who face the same high cost of health care, each person having to pay separately because of the rules ofthe federal, state, local and private firms we are employed by. And, I know many others whose COBRA programs have recently run out whose partners cannot cover them in their healthcare plans. For such couples, they simply pray that nothing catastrophic happens to the partner without the insurance that they cannot afford currently. Clearly it is time to work toward change so that all may have family health insurance, whether a couple is in a straight or LGBTQ-coupled relationship. It is both an issue of justice, but also of compassion, regardless of one's political, philo sophical, theological or ideological position. :: qomunity qonexions ^ • Custom Framing • Remodeling •Home Improvement •Custom Trim • Decks • Free Estimates M&M f. Construction Matthew Willets 336.669.9259 Km .1 'f . 4 i Gifts For All Reasons Chet Calloway 601 S. Kings Drive Kingspointe Shopping Ctr. Charlotte, NC 28204 704.372.8892 - h'ax: 704.372.9502 Toll Ftee: 800.818.9442 www.basketsandblossoms.com CHURCH OF THE HOLY SPIRIT FELLOWSHIP. INC. 1005 Burke Street Suite B (lower level) Winston Salem North Carolina 27101 Phone: 336-63 M331 “Where the fullness of God’s love resides” REV. ROGER E. HAYES Pastor & Teacher * AN INOEPENOEIIT CHUACH * An Affirming minht^ * A safe place to hea! and grow in Qirist Jesus * Celebrating the Radically indusive Love of Jesus Chmt www.chsfhc.org.com | UNITY JhKIJ.OWSHlP ChDRCII ClIAKl.OTrr JCw CiiKisri,\N Si;h\i;i; RiaulS In Thj: Airican-Ami;ri('.an TRilnrrioN Bishop Tonyia M. Rawi.s Foundino Pastor 2127 Eastway Drive at Kjijborne Charlotte, NC 704-567-3007 Services held Sundays at 10:45 am Bibee Study - Wednesdays at 7 pm www.ufccharlottenc.org Pieedmont Uoitariae Universalist Church Sunday Services - 10:30 a.m. 9704 Mallard Creek Rd. Charlotte, NC 28262 in the University area Check out our calendar: join in our many activities and groups vwwii.puuc.org 704-510-0008 Inspiring spiritual growth through diversity and religious freedom. Cali Q-Notes 704.531.9988 :#PLAS # YOUR BUSINESS " • 4^ HERE :iM^rriv.rv RUSS CARD SALES/LEASING 6824 E. INDEPENDENCE BLVD. CHAFtLOTTE. NC 28227 704-563-7800 FAX 704-563-9172 DIRECT UNE 704-516-9274 TCXJ. FREE 1 -800-763-7811 WEBSITE: www.hendrickacuracom EMAIL russ.gardOhendrickauto.cotn 2000 PRECISION TEAM DEALERSHIP OF DISTINCTION Serving the Charlotte area since 1999 Complete Accounting Services for individuals and small businesses tax preparation and filing payroll and book keeping services Samuel J. Gardner, III epa 704.651.0286 samgar3@bellsouth.net July 10-23.2010 qnotes 17