w The joKOLEfpiATK: VOL XX VII ATLANTIC CHRISTIAN COLIJIGK. APRIL 1. 1957. Nl'MHKR 10 NAACC HONORS DR. WRINGER Elvis Presley To Appear Here The Assembly and Concert Committee announced re cently that they have obtained Flvis Pre.-wley to perform ill chapel Wednesday, May 8. Mr. Tait, a member of the committee, made the announcement at a meetinft of “A” club recently. Elvia (The Pelvi.s) will jtive a program lartinfr the entire morninfr and faculty members are asked to excuse their students if any of them, wi.sh to attend this ci>n -fltert (?). Students are al.so reminded that the first 500 feats are re.served for members of the “Decade” club, a club that is interested in the development of Klvis Pri— leyanism on campus. Pressley is expected to ainjr his famous numbers (in cluding; “Heartthrob Motel”, “You Ain’t Nothin Hut A 'Croundhoj?”, “Club Me Tender”, and "Don’t Step In That J>ile of Blue Suede”) and give autoKraphed picturc:-. after the concert. < There will be no admi.ssion charKe, but students who attend will have ten quality points subtracted from their rade total. This is beinR done in order to make it impoas- ble for a larRe number of .students to attend the concert, fter all, the “Decade” club will take up most of the .seats nyway. A reception immediately after the concert will be held n the boiler room behind the dining hall for Mr. Pre.ssley and the Concert Committee. All second-semester juniors are invited to this reception. "Boilermakers” will be served. Man From Mars Gives Talk To Science Club Those who attended a rcccnt gcience club Iccture were treated (to a real surprise. Unbeknowing to Unyone in charge, Wxty Pwtrxmz, [a space visitor from Mars "drop- jpfd in” on the club and proceeded I to expound at length on the sub ject, ‘•OTKDR SLISK JD HOPA, E &M&XM&." Needless to say, the science club members listcni.'d in awed rapture iu this impromptu visitor. The rea son no one left is because Mr. Pwtrxmz casually held a space gun aimed at his audience. Dr. Continued on Page Four Bohunk Function To Be Changed Mrs. Ik-da Spade, director of the "Bohimk" has rocenUy announced a new policy conc*erning all future activltJc* of Cie popular al jmni- «:tudont center. *’Financial burdens have causc'd the chanifc,” says Mrs. Spade. believe in calling a -speight a spade.) BeginninR next week, roulette wheel.s, prx>l tables, crap tables, and bin^o 'For money) tables will be available to the students. The new Director of College Growth and Development will be in charge of all of '‘gamboling** facilities. Students must present their athle tic card and swear that they are over twenty-one in order to play these gameu of chance. If they are Continued on Page Four Many ACC studeniN urrr Nhcieked to hear that »ome of our faculty mrmhern wrrr rrnlfnlng. Ilrrr we have one of Ihr HadUer Ntudrnti* cryinff htmnrlf to Klerp. Ku>»ty Toadn. a urnlor fromi Kalrlffh, hah Id Hueh a burrowing »tate that hr did not rraUxe hU pirture was bring taken. What Fools We Mortals Be! ART BISHOP In Shakespeare’s comedy A Midsummer NiKht’a Dream through thev oice of the comedical character Puck, Shakespeare uses the.se words: “What fools these morals be!” Your reader in an effort to prove or disprove theae words has played the part of the fool in asking certain people around our campus some foolish questions. I ■wiU let you decide whether or not the answers are foolish. Fool ish que.stions asked by a fool should equal foolish answers! If we had a nudist colony on our campus, would you join it? Brinkley Lewis — “Yes, if it was all girls.” How many angels can sit in the eye of a needle? PcKgy Rouse — “It depends upon how big the eye is!” Does Mrs. Eagles smoke question marks between Dr. Hartaock — “Yes, she rools big black cigars in the kitchen.” Do you think Miss Mildred Ross will qualify for the Indianapolis Speedway race in May? Mr. Milton Adams — “It is veiy po.ssible. For more recent time trial information you might consult Mr. Mc- Farlane since he accompanied Miss Ross to the basket ball tournament in Lexington.” . Does Dr. Long talk to herself in French or Spanwh. Bill Boswell — “Both in all clas.ses.” If fraternities were co-ed, would you join. Joe Hardegree — “Yes, if they were on a national basis.” . *u t Does Kenneth Rouse have a sore ankle or is that a ball and chain that he is dragging around? . . ■ June Young — “He is dragging a big ball and chain. What will happen to the Lone Ranger if Tonto gets drafted? „ Ellis Dennis — “Maybe he’d marry me. April Fool April Fool Several Faculty Members Resign m _ ^ Several ACC faculty members have tendfred their resignations effective June 6, 1957. When the news hit the campus the shock was so great that the Ki'a.'W withered under Mr. Ramsjiy’s nose. Dr. J. P. Tyndall announced that he wa>- leaving to accept the presidency of the National Skin-Divers Insti tute. Dr. Tyndall feels that he can make a great contribu tion to this organization due to his ability to swim and his great amount of skin. He feels that he can be a shining light to all would-be, present, and has-been, akin-divers. As a matter of fact, when he is standing in the sun he is a shining light to everybody. Dr. E.Hther Ivong is leaving ACC in order that she might devote time to some poat-doctoral research. She i.n prepar ing a paper on the subject: “How To Make French Stu dents Shriek With Pain In the Kev of C-sharp.” "1 feel that I can make a contribution to all language teachers on a subject they are all vitiilly intere.sted in,” said Dr. Long. Miss Sarah Hain Ward is also retiring from academic life in order to devote time to writing. AIis.H War