PAGE FOUR
THE BENNETT BANNER
FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 14, 1986
Fear defies simple definition
an essay
by Fredericka Turner
Fear is the death of the heart.
It is the cessation of all feeling
except a strange ticking in the
brain. Fear can be magnified to a
f)oLnt beyond other abstract con
cepts like beauty or truth. It is
one word that each individual can
define clearly through examples.
The dictionary defines fear as
dread, fright, alarm or panic. It
says that fear is an often strong
emotion that comes about as the
result of impending or supposed
danger. Yet this definition merely
outlines what fear really is. The
one way to illustrate cold dread
is through examples that have
been related to me or through
my own personal experiences.
When I was visiting my grand
mother in Woodville, Miss., an
old, rather drunk man related the
following tale to me. I realize
that what he had seen were vi
sions, but tike cold sweat that
broke out on his brow and his
trembling hands were very real.
“Well, I was retunin’ from a
pah-ty down by ole Luke’s . . .
you know ole Luke? I was down
by dem railroad tracks by yo
grandmammy’s and I was jest a-
walkin’. And you know when I’s
get a-walkin’ I’s get a whistlin’
too. Well here is me, jest a-walkin’
and whistlin’ down dem tracks
when all of a sudden I sees a man
about a five yards ahead of me.
I’m thinkin’ bout now that I might
like some company bein’ it so
dark on the tracks. So I call out
to him. But he didn’t turn around.
I figure he must of didn’t have
heard me so I call out again. He
still don’t answer.
“So I figure maybe he deef or
something, but deef company is
better than none so I begin to
run. But no matter how fast I
run, and I’m running to beat the
devil now, I can’t catch him and
he is still walking the same slow
pace. And that’s when I stop run
ning and take a good look at the
fellow. I guess he decided to look
at me too ’cause he turned and
looked over his shoulder and
smiled at me. I hopes never to
again see such pasty skin and
hallowd nothin-lookin’ eyes. I
hope never again to look in the
face of death like I did that night.
I turned and ran and I’m damn
sure you’ll never see me over
dere again.”
My own fear also stems from
the supernatural. I have a deep
fear of dolls. Many people de
nounce this fear as ridiculous or
improbable but it is very real to
me.
When I look in the face of a
china doll, I do not see its exqui
sitely painted cheeks or charming
smile; I see its dark eyes staring
relentlessly into mine. I gave
away a gorgeous and expensive
rag doll that bears my name (this
was long before that mockery of
a doll called Cabbage Patch came
to market) because its eyes re
mained steadily fixed upon me at
every turn. Once it fell from the
mantle directly onto my sleeping
face and I screamed until my
mother removed it. I cannot tol
erate dolls.
The dictionary also defines fear
as reverence or great respect for
God. I acquired this ill-named
respect when I was 10 years old.
My mother was in the hospital
having a baby. My father had
joined her in the delivery room
and, with the uncanny wit that
children sometimes have, I sensed
something was wrong. I later dis
covered that my mother had a
very difficult time delivering my
little brother Jade.
My sister Jules, who was eight
at the time, and I were left in
the dark and rather cold waiting
room under the assurance that a
nurse would keep a constant eye
over us. The nurse left. I assumed
that since I was a big girl, all df
10 years old, I could be respon
sible for taking care of the both
of us. We played games, watched
television and ate snacks that my
father had left for us. Yet the
night waned away and my father
did not return. My little sister
fell asleep in a chair and I knew
that though it was late at night
and I was tired, too, I had to
stay awake to protect her.
The waiting room was com
pletely devoid of life. I had never
been more frightened in my life.
Sleep seemed to want to claim
me, but I constantly fought it. I
could only sit nodding in the hard
chairs of St. Francis Hospital. To
stay awake, I stared at a magni
ficent statue of Jesus Christ that
stood in the center of the foyer.
Suddenly, as I stared, His robes
began to flow softly. I rubbed my
eyes, but not disbelievingly. As I
watched, Christ stepped from the
pedestal upon which He was
standing and walked slowly
toward me and my sleeping sister.
I felt no fear in the traditional
sense; I had never thought much
about God. When He had walked
close enough. He bent and kissed
my brow and the brow of my
sister.
I remember nothing else after
wards except waking in my
father’s lap to the news that I
had a baby brother. When I told
my mother this tale, she smiled
and never questioned me. I have,
never taken time to question
whether the event was a child
hood fantasy or the visions of a
sleeping child. Such an event as
this is beyond questioning. It is
to be taken and appreciated, and
it cultured in me a reverence for
the greatness of our Savior.
These are just a few examples
of the fears that everyone has ex
perienced. Fear cannot be defined
because it is beyond our ability
to understand it even within our
selves. When we feel fear, we do
not take the time to interpret it.
Often we cannot even determine
where the roots of this dread lie.
We only know the heart-rending
emotion that is as overwhelming
as a flood and as deep as the
deepest ocean. We only feel the
fear.
Mandela’s latest writing
denounces apartheid
Two new books by the impri
soned leader of South Africa’s
anti-apartheid movement. Nelson
Mandela, have been recently pub
lished in the United States. They
are “The Struggle Is My Life”
and “Habla Nelson Mandela.”
Mandela’s books are published
by Pathfinder F^ess in New York,
which also publishes books by
Fidel Castro, MJalcolm X, and
leaders of the Sandinista revolu
tion in Nicaragua.
“Life” brings together speeches
and writings by Mandela span
ning more than 40 years of his
activity in the African National
Congress (ANC), the major or
ganization fighting for the end of
apartheid rule in South Africa.
Mandela’s courtroom testimony in
the 1964 trial at which he was
sentenced to life imprisonment is
also included. A special supple
ment contains accounts of Man
dela in prison by his fellow
prisoners.
Among the most recent material
is Mandela’s reply to South Afri
can President P. W. Botha’s 1985
offer to release Mandela if the
ANC leader “unconditionally re
jected violence as a political wea
pon.” In his reply, read by his
daughter Zinzi to a mass meeting
in Soweto, near Johannesburg,
Mandela said: “Let him (Botha)
renounce violence. Let him say
that he will dismantle apartheid.
Let him unban the people’s or
ganization, the African National
Congress. Let him free all who
have been imprisoned, banished
or exiled for their opposition to
apartheid. Let him guarantee free
political activity so that people
may decide who will govern
them. . .
“But I cannot sell my birth
right, nor am I prepared to sell
the birthright of the people to be
free. . .
“Only free men can negotiate.
Prisoners cannot enter into con
tracts ... I cannot and wiU not
give any undertaking at a time
when I and you, the people, are
not free.
“Your freedom and mine can
not be separated. I will return.”
Mandela remains imprisoned at
the Pollsmoor maximum security
prison near Cape Town, despite
the growing movement in South
Africa and throughout the world
demanding his release.
‘Habla” contains Spanish trans
lations of Mandela’s courtroom
testimony in 1962 and 1964, and
the freedom charter, the key docu
ment of the South African free
dom struggle.
Both books contain photographs
of Mandela, his wife, Winnie, and
protest activities in South Africa.
Women are heading more families
but tiie growth rate is decreasing
The growth rate of families
maintained by black women
has declined significantly
since the mid-1970s, accord
ing to the Commerce Depart
ment’s Census Bureau.
Such families grew by 41
percent from 1970 to 1975;
the growth dropped to 19 per
cent in the 1980s.
The rate of increase among
white female householders
also has slowed since 1975,
but at a lesser rate than for
blacks, the report shows. The
white rate dropped to 15 per
cent in 1980-1985 from 25
percent in 1970-1975.
While growth rates have
fallen, the number and pro
portion of families maintained
by women have risen since
1970. For blacks the total
rose from 1.4 million to 3
million and for white families
from 4.1 million to 6.9 million.
Women maintained 44 per
cent of black families in 1985,
up from 28 percent, while
women maintained 13 percent
of white families, up from
9 percent.
The nation had an esti
mated 6.8 million black fami
lies in 1985, of which 51 per
cent were married-c o u p 1 e
families. Black families total
ed 4.9 million in 1970.
The number of white fami
lies increased from 46.2 mil
lion to 54.4 million in 1970-
1985. A husband and wife
were present in more than
four out of five of white
families in 1985.
The data in this report
come from a survey, and are
subject to a margin of error
that would not be present in
a full census of the popula
tion.
Copies of this final report,
“Household and Family Char
acteristics : March 1985,”
P.20, No. 411, are available
from the Superintendent of
Documents, U.S. Government
Printing Office, Washington,
D.C. 20402.
Newsmakers: info you should know
Memorial Scholarship: Ellease Colston, director of Alumnae Affairs, has an
nounced a $25,000 scholarship in memory of Mrs. Willie Mae Floyd McCallum has
been given to the college by the United Institutional Baptist Church in Greens
boro.
Mrs. McCallum, a 1935 graduate of Bennett, was also an instructor in the
college’s department of social sciences until her retirement in the spring of 1980.
Throughout her years at Bennett, she gave active support to the college’s alum
nae program.
Dr. Charles W. Anderson, pastor of the United Institutional Baptist Church,
has stated that the gift is to honor a loyal member of his congregation and is
also one of the many projects the church has undertaken to reach the commun
ity. He and co-pastor. Dr. Lois Anderson, are great supporters of education, ac
cording to Colston, also a member of the U.I.B. Church. Colston reports that the
church has given a total of $100,000 to educational institutions since June 30.
The Willie Mae Floyd McCallum Scholarship will be perpetuating and will be
available to any new or present student from Guilford County that maintains a
“C” average. (Sallie Hayes)
Baskets for the needy: Did you know that the Thanksgiving season is not a
season of Thanksgiving for many people ? At least for most of those who find
themselves with nothing during this season.
What we do here as a family on this campus is to try each year to provide for
them some of the basic blessings which most of us usually take for granted.
Lately we have been counting our blessings at the Student Interfaith Center
and we have counted, for example, the fact that we have yet to run out of coffee
and tea at the center during the cold months and we could use more.
The Thanksgiving season offers us the opportunity to share what we have
with those not so fortunate in the Greensboro community through the distribu
tive program of the Greensboro Urban Ministry. Many students and campus or
ganizations are already doing their part. We hope you are also encouraging your
friends, your dormitory, your club or sorority to contribute to the baskets for
this year. Please let the Interfaith Center know when your basket is ready.
We also want to take this opportunity to thank you for your cooperation and
wish for you, your friends and family the best Thanksgiving season. (Rev. P.
E. A. Addo)
Magazine Contest: Belles are invited to participate in Glamour Magazine’s
1987 Top Ten College Women Competition. Young women from colleges and uni
versities throughout the country will compete in Glamour’s search for ten out
standing students. A panel of Glamour editors will select the winners on the
basis of their solid records of achievement in academic studies and/or extracur
ricular activities on campus or in the community.
The 1987 Top Ten College Women will be featured in Glamour’s August Col
lege Issue. During May, June or July, the ten winners will receive an all-expen-
ses-paid trip to New York City and will participate in meetings with professio
nals in their area of interest.
The deadline for submitting an application to Glamour is Dec. 19.
Career Services News: Here is the latest recruiting schedule.
November 18-19—Kroger (Mid-Atlantic Marketing Area) ; for Business, Ac
counting and English Majors—9 a.m.-4 p.m.
November 20—Bell Communication Research; Mr. Stone will be recruiting for
math/computer science, engineering, business, chemistry, accounting, marketing
with a computer science background majors—9 a.m.-4 p.m.
November 21—Roche Biomedical Lab., Inc. Subsidiary of Hoffmann La Roche
Inc. Ms. Hunley will be recruiting for biology, chemistry and medical technology
majors—9 a.m.-4 p.m.
Seminar: The Career Services Center will present “Preparing for the Job
Interview” in the Health Center Conference room on Dec. 4 at 6 p.m.