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Page 20 {The Blue Banner} Wednesday, March 31, 2010 Social norms and expectations change with time Technology changes the dating scene and confuses single people B ack in the day, when easily defined social norms exist ed, social networking meant seven women sitting on the front porch gossiping and giggling while sipping sweet tea. As a young adult in a fast-moving age, it seems the contrast between the current and past generations is wider than before. Before, people knew the clearly defined etiquette. Families met for dinner and dis cussed their activities, and young men took women out for milkshakes. Nobody follows the so-called rules anymore. That is, if there are still rules to follow. Now, fast food and frozen din ners rein the table, and couples argue about appropriate venues and split ting the check. Texting, digital music players and networking Web sites, like Facebook and Twitter, have encroached on what used to be normal relationships, with a disconnect occurring where bonds used to form. How often does one hold serious conversations via Facebook chat or through a text message? Almost every day, severe confron tations and hopeful advising discus sions happen via online chatting, where the only advantage is using emoticons to express the pseudo- heartfelt emotion the user might be trying to convey. Mike Mikolajczyk said he had an almost entirely technological re lationship with one of his ex-girl friends. They met on the free dating Web site PlentyofFish.com and spent a few days e-mailing and getting to know each other through online chat ting. Therefore, justifiably, she should not have been surprised. Luckily, Mikolajcyzk, now an employee at Best Buy on Tunnel Road in Ashe ville, had good things to say to By Caitlin Halloran Staff Writer CMHALLOR@UNCA.EDU people who follow him on the Web site. “Mmm, so that just might have qualified as the best all around date Fve ever had. Definitely the best first date. Lovely night,” the A-B Tech sophomore posted. Is this acceptable? It depends on the individual re lationship, but overall it makes for a complicated mess of who knows what. It is acceptable if both individu als are OK with it, as Mikolajczyk and his date were, but not all couples would handle the surprise blog as well as others. The “OMG you tweeted our date?” giggling text might become an incredulous and uncomfortable feeling about the public’s knowledge of personal details. Associate professor of anthropol ogy at LfNC Asheville, John Wood, cautioned against adopting a timeta ble of BT, or before technology, and AT, for after technology. However, it seems to be the easi est scapegoat. “One hundred years ago, 200 years ago, people still got distract ed,” he said. It is becoming a new problem of accessibility. Wood described some generational differences in personal relationships and the way they have changed course. “When I see two people walking together and they’re on the phone with different people, that seems weird to me. Or when they’re walk ing through the forest and they’ve got ’ an iPod plugged into their ears, that ^ocTdfl. Morws dud stdliTstics * On free dating Web ^ites, roughly 10 percent of new, daily accounts are from scammers. * For singles using dating sites, one-third form a relationship, one-third do not, and one-third gives up on online dating. * There are approximately T ,400 online dating sites in North America. * Almost h^If of Americans know someone who has found a date online. * Americans will spend $1.7 billion on dating services in 2013. I * In 2003, the online industry raked in a little more than $ 950 million, 'T Online dating sites had nearly 23 million different visitors last ; {June. „ I Ninety-twdperceiiftof singleparentsprefertodateother . ] single parents. | - . ' There ar^approximately 95 million single people in the U.S, just seems weird,” he said. “Also, it just seems normal to that genera tion. I don’t think it’s a problem, it’s just a different way to hang out with friends.” Wood, who has a doctorate and master’s in anthropology, argued against the idea that this generation is vastly different. “I’m not sure there was a time when things were fixed,” he said. Wood used Plato as an example, citing that even in ancient times people bemoaned the corruption of youth. Consider the Elvis generation, and how their parents insisted it was devil music. Those youth are this generation’s grandparents, and they probably hate what they must consider obscene; musical brain rot. This is not a recent debate. Plato complained of children’s antics, “The young people of today think of nothing but themselves. They have’^ See NORMS Page 2?] ^i! For the latest opinions on campus, local and national issues visit: www.thebluebanner.net
University of North Carolina at Asheville Student Newspaper
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March 31, 2010, edition 1
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