THE CLARION
Tuesday, November 13. iatq
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Sports Line
By Bobby Hayes
While listening to the radio a
week or so ago, I heard quite a
bizarre story on the news which I
would like to present in this
column. The story dealt with an
institution established in Denver,
Colorado named “The Church of
Monday Night Football.”
“The Church of Monday Night
Football” is not a prank, but
instead a very real organi
zation which has many
loyal members. The manner in
which the church is run is similar
to the way other more con
ventional religions conduct
themselves. Members of the
church meet every Monday night
during football season to watch
the NFL football game presented
that night by ABC-TV at a
building the members bought for
that purpose. They have
fellowship before and after every
game to make it a complete
experience.
The church members wear
chains with football ornaments as
a symbol of their worship to
football. They follow six written
commandments such as the third
one which states," Thou shalt not
covet they neighbors beer while
watching the game.” Members
are also expected to participate
in the annual pilgrimmage the
church takes to the Holy Land,
which is the site of the Super
Bowl, to watch the “Big Game”
(the Super Bowl). The conception
of “heaven coming to earth” or
“Paradise” is when the Super
Bowl is someday played on a
Monday night.
At this point, I imagine all of
you are asking, “How do I join
this wonderful organization?”
Here’s how. According to their
leader, Reverend Slate, they
accept anybody with a genuine
interest in Monday night football.
New members are baptized
(don’t ask) before the viewing of
each game. If you would like to
become a minister of the church.
Rev. Slate will ordain members
for a fee of five dollars.
The church attempts to recruit
new members by advertising in
the local paper. However, this
has had limited success because
many newspaper publishers
believe the church to be
sacreligious. Slate counters this
charge by reporting that his
organization has saved many
marriages and prevented many
people from joining damaging
cults, therefore doing a'
creditable service for the com
munity. Slate believes it is much
easier on a wife for her husband
to call and say “I’m at church
and I’ll be home around one”
than for her to have to worry
about what he is doing while he is
out. Slate also reports that many
of his members feel they have
saved their lives by joining the
church. He said that one man told
him that he was going to join the
Moon cult had it not been for the
church.
“The Church of Monday Night
Football.” Does it serve a useful
function as its members claimor
is it merely a poor sacreligious
joke? I guess it’s for us to decide.
But don’t say you weren’t in
formed.
The winner of Bubba’s Football
Contest is Grady Folger. Folger
missed only one game in winning a
free spaghetti dinner from Bubba’s
Italian Restaurant.
li^
“Brevard harrier heads toward the finish line.
Spikers End Season
by Bobby Henson
The Lady Tornado Volleyball
team closed out disappointing
season on Tuesday Oct. 30 when
they hosted Milligan College and
Spartanburg-Methodist. In the
first match of the evening,
Brevard contested Milligan. The
girls fell behind early in the first
game, but made what Coach
Anderson termed as a very
spirited comeback, only to come
up on the short end of the ledger
of 15-14. Coach Anderson stated
that the girls appeared confident
in that first game, but that the
confidence faded the rest of the
night as they lost the match to
Milligan and dropped their
second match against Spar-
tanburg-Methodist.
Coach Anderson stated that she
along with the team was disap
pointed with the 3-18 record, but
also felt that the team ac-
up on the short end of the ledger also felt that the tea
losing the first game by the score complished a lot of things.
Harriers Take
28 Straight
Tornados Split Two
With Dekalb Central
by Mike McFarland
The B.C. soccer team split a
pair of games in a weekend series
in Georgia, bowing to DeKalb-
Central 6-1 on October 26th and
then bouncing back to defeat
DeKalb-South 5-4 on the 27th. The
Torandos also recorded a win by
forfeit over Warren Wilson’s “B”
team on November 3rd.
Ed Pagan scored the Tornados
lone goal in the first half of the
DeKalb-South game, keeping
B.C. within striking distance
with Central holding a 2-1 half-
time lead. The Central strikers
proceeded to score four times in
the second half.
The Tornados regained some
satisfaction when they defeated
DeKalb-South the following day
due to Andy Dickinson’s late
game heroics. Dickinson’s
penalty kick in the second
overtime period was good and
decided the game. Goals from Ed
Pagan, Mark Lee, Nino Dieppa
and Hassan Regimand enabled
B.C. to streak to a 4-0 lead at the
half, sending the game into
overtime.
Warren Wilson’s “B” team had
.to forfeit a game scheduled for
November 3rd, leaving Brevard’s
final season record at 10-3-1.
As of press time, the Tornados
were to travel to Jacksonville
University to participate in the
Southeastern Regionals which
starts on Friday November 9.
The Tornados drew a first-round
bye and were to meet either
Florida’s champion or the winner
of a Georgia-Alabama match-up.
If B.C. wins the Southeast
Regionals, they will advance to
Essek Community College in
Baltimore, Md. along with the
other seven top teams in the
nation on November 21st-24th to
compete for the national title.
by Ray Duckworth
On November 3, Jeff Went
worth set a new course record on
a rainy course in a time of
25:11.8. It was the 28th straight timeof28T2
duel meet victory for Brevard.
The victory over Ferrum was irf
the regionals leading to the
national meets. Brevard has won
the region for the past eleven
years.
Other finishers were John
George, second, in a time of
26:28; Ronnie Treadway, third, in
27:00, Joe Briscoe, fourth, in
27:05; Roger Saltzman, fifth, in
27:06; Michael Bachman and
Greg Stotler tied for eight in a
On October 24, Brevard
defeated the Furman Junior
Varsity squad. The top four
runners, Roger Saltsman, Jeff
Wentworth, John George, and
Ronnie Treadway, all from
Brevard, tied for first in a time of
George, second, m a time of oc.oc
^ * sic ********** ^ 5}: *********** 5jc * ♦
Bubba^s Football Contest *
Home Team
South Carolina
Notre Dame
Michigan
Maine
San Diego
Washington
Los Angeles
Pick the total number of points scored between
Baltimore vs New England
The box for the entry blanks will be located at Bubba’s
Italian Restaurant.
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The winner will receive one free spaghetti dinner. *
NAME *
Wake Forest
Clemson
Ohio State
Northeastern
Pittsburgh
Dallas
Atlanta
•»^ ********* sjc :jc ^ jjcjc ^ jj. jj, ^ ^
Whites
by Bobby Hayes
Paced by Scott Harper’s 32
points, the White team turned
back the Blues, 102-94 in the
annual Tornado Blue-White in
trasquad basketball game.
Trailing 48-46 at halftime, the
White team, coached by Dean
Morris Wray, took control of the
game behind the heroics of 6’2”
sophomore guard Scott Harper.
Harper took command on both
ends of the court while pumping
in 20 second-half points on his way
to a game-high 32, shooting near
60% from the field. In addition, he
amassed 7 rebounds, 4 steals, and
was a perfect 6 for 6 from the foul
line.
Other outstanding players for
the Whites included sophomore
poiiit guard Kevin Herron, who
scored 18 points and connected on
5 consecutive jumpers from 15
feet or more during an eight
minute span of the game, and
sophomore center David Horner,
who added 15 points while
shooting 70 percent from the field
and hauling down a game-high 12
rebounds. The White shot a torrid
70 percent from the field in the
second half and 63 percent for the
game.
The Blue team, behind the
efforts of their coach. President
Jacob Martinson, were led by
Anthony “Moose” Timberlake’s
20 points, followed by Bobby
Summers with 18, and freshman
Robert Campbell with 17 points.
Timberlake connected on 10 of 14
shots (71 percent) and played a
fine all-around game. Freshman
Rodney Williams chipped in 8
assists for the Blue squad,
which shot 58 percent in the
game.
Winning coach Morris Wray
was quite happy with his win until
he was congratulated by his
coaching opponent. Dr. Mar
tinson, who lathered the Dean’s
head in shaving cream as a token
of his admiration for the job
Wray did.
Prior to the Blue-White game,
the Tornados had scrimmaged
three other teams in preparation
for the coming season. New head
coach Sam Lewis was pleased
with the Tornados performance
and progress during each of the
three scrimmages versus
Presbyterian, Lander, and USC-
Spartanburg, all four-year
colleges.
Tri-captains for the 1979-80
Tornados squad are Kevin
Herron, Moose Timberlake, and
Scott Harper, all returnees from
the squad that finished sixth in
the nation last year. Coach Lewis
has an equal balance of ex
perienced and inexperienced
players as 7 players return from
last year and 7 new players join
the squad.
Lewis hopes for an extremely
successful year and promises it
will be exciting, stating “We hope
to have a product that fans will
want to come to see. ’ ’