Page H4
Hilarion
The Hilarion \ April 1,2019
VERY specialized parking?
Bowing to demands for additional parking on campus for ‘religious’ people, Brevard College has reassigned some spaces on campus for cult members. So
far, the only people who have used EC’s new “A Cult” parking have been members of a relatively new religio-political movement that started several years
ago in which parishioners sport red baseball caps inscribed with a statement of the movement’s creed.
Color your
own 'White'
Squirrel for
Easter!
CREEPIN
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with the” Jones.
And Marie Jones, the current director of the
library, has followed CREEPIN’s request to
change her last name to “Smith.”
Sims Art Building will change its name
officially to “THE Sims” and will be
Easter
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used to ensure that no furry friends are harmed
during the process.
The colors blue, pink, yellow, purple and
green will be available in pastel shades to
dye the squirrels, as these are common Easter
colors. The event will take place outside Myers
Dining Hall. Students must have their rabies
vaccine for safety and health purposes while
handling wild animals.
represented on campus literature by small
cartoon-like figures of human beings.
Finally, McLarty-Goodson (MG) and
Moore Science (MS) will be joined under
a single name, McLarty-Science-Goodson,
or MSG. And despite being slightly south
and east of the main complex of buildings,
Moore Science Annex will follow this
new campuswide “up-is-down” naming
philosophy and be referred to as North
McLarty-Science-Goodson: NO-MSG.