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10
Can You Say “Lesbian”?
Recently I was talking with a straight
friend who was concerned that she was not
truly open to lesbian issues and asked if
"I could try to help her understand what
it is like to be a lesbian." (She of
course only referred to me as a gay
woman.)
I initially offered the standard
repli es, but they struck me as trivial. '
tended to articulate only the more nega
tive aspects of my sexual orientation,
such as homophobia and discrimination. I
haven’t the audacity to speak for all
lesbians, in that I know there is more to
us than either stereotypes or our oppres
sion. It is a too intensely personal
experience to be summed up in a super
ficial sentence or two.
For me, being a lesbian is the most
wonderful part of my life—and the hard
est. By acknowledging my lesbianism, I
have been and will be able to be more in
touch with the real me, but at the same
time I am forced to hide myself behind
many false faces: single, unmarried,
still looking, etc. But one of the great
est parts of being a lesbian is that I am
able to really appreciate my womanhood "in
my element," and I get to experience being
a woman without encumberance.
In this sexist soceity, there is so
much programming aimed at making women
feel bad about their gender. My lesbian
ism is one of the ways I combat that pro
gramming. I find great strength in women
and what other women historically have
accomplished, and I look forward to a
future where women will play a bigger role
in our society. To me, then, I cannot
separate being a lesbian from being a
woman. To be born a woman creates many
exciting possibilities, and lesbianism is
one of the ways I experience being a
woman.
Of course there are trying times too.
Some people try to categorize me as
immature, unwomanly, mentally unsound, or
sinful, and sometimes when I am feeling
down I let it hurt me. T do grow tired of
using the words roommate and friend for
cover. I do grow tired of classes where
all that is discussed is heterosexual
possibilities. And finally I do grow
really tired of seeing mroe men than women
speak out for lesbian/gay rights, often
referred to as merely "gay rights.
The word "lesbian" seems to have some
strange stigma associated with it. Con
sequently, people avoid using it. So if
you can say "the L word,' if you can
vocalize that lesbian utterance, say it!
Use it and feel great and comfortable say
ing it. If it is hard at first, practice
saying it alone in your bathroom or while
driving. Just repeat it over and over
again to yourself: lesbian, lesbian.
There ^ something about that word; make
that something powerful
-Jill Duvall
I wish in this mountain haze
of goat world penis promises
that my one true love would
(in delerium)
deliver me from this
house of unknowing evil
in love’s infinite
false wisdom
of wrong-headedness,
politically incorrect as it is-
sweep me off my feet
and under the fast tide
of picture-perfect.
romance—novel endings
-Nina Nahunta
&-
(HARVEY MILK from page 9)
meeting in a candlelight vigil on the
night of the killings.
White was convicted of manslaughter
rather than the two counts of first degree
murder under "special circumstances" with
which he was charged. Under a California
law which White had supported, he would
have faced a mandatory death sentence for
multiple political assassinations. His
defense was based on a plea of "temporary
insanity."
White’s attorney successfully used what
came to be called the "Twinkle defense,
claiming that White’s judgment had been
severely impaired by his consumption of
junk food. He had been depressed about
money matters and the Mayor’s refusal to
allow him to rescind his resignation from
the Board.
When the verdict was announced, 5,000
gays rioted for several hours. The White
Night Riot caused thousands of dollars in
damage. Supervisor Harry Britt, an openly
gay man appointed to fill out Milk’s term,
was charged with inciting the riot. He
reportedly said, "This is gay anger you
are seeing. We aren’t going to put up
with any more Whites."
Response to White’s death has been
quiet. Mayor Dianne Feinstein who
succeeded Moscone, said: "This latest
tragedy should close a very sad chapter in
this city’s history." And one gay leader
spoke of White’s suicide as "a strong and
ironic ending to the story."
(reprinted with permission from The
Front Page, Nov. 5, 1985)