Newspapers / Lambda (Carolina Gay and … / Feb. 1, 1987, edition 1 / Page 11
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■ Short Story “The New One I hate stereotypes, I really do, but some people just seem to live up to them and then, the dated, and it 'Cause then I' person, but 1 contrived and stereotypes are just vali- s really just a bitch, m torn. I want to like the can't qet past their being so cliche. Jossi's new boyfriend is a stereotype- right down to his firm, I'm-so-masculine, let-me-grind-your-phalanges handshake. He has that look about him. Nice face, nice build, little bit of pot-belly, his deep voice a litle forced, polo shirt, beige duckhead slacks. But when Jossi told me he put a neon Budweiser sign over his bed, I knew it: this boy was definitely the shortest distance between two fixed points; not a bend in sight. Jocelyn is my oldest and dearest friend. We go way back to the seventh grade when, by way of a self-introduction, she frogged my. arm in homeroom. I wolloped her back, always a feisty white boy at heart, and she tossed a book at me , which I dodged, and we both ended up in detention hall. Friends forever. Amen. We wanted to room together in college, but we figured that idea wouldn't fly with the University Housing Authority. So we settled on the same dorm, just different floors. Things progressed through the first two weeks of classes nicely enough-- we had English together--and now she'd brought this new boyfriend of hers to meet me. "Steve, I want ya to meet Randy, who I've been telling you about." Christ! She must really like this one, to be on such good behavior. The last time she came to show off her new beau, the conversation started with: "Hey, bitch! Steve! C'mere and meet my new one. You'll like him, he's got ass!" Jocelyn wastes no words in serious lust. Or up to should be worried about. Randy and I exchanged pleasantries. "Hi, nice ta meet you." I smiled, trying to play Jos's little niceness game, ^nd wondering what to expect; as if anything of Jos's doing could be the realm the expected. « ^ - I — TV CONDOM ADS URGED The New York Times News Service reported that Surgeon General C. Everett Koop is strongly supportive of condom advertise ments on TV. Koop testified before a House subcommittee that the ads were "necessary and "a positive public health benefit in stopping the spread of the disease Koop noted that AIDS has hit the black and Hispanic communities especially har , and urged that advertisements be aimed a these groups. However, all three major TV networks ^ABC, NBC, and CBS) have voiced opposition a cute Unless she's something I "Yeah, how'sit goin'?" Typical. Probably all the English he knows. That and, "Any more in the keg?" He seemed uncomfortable; he kept gnawing his nails and looking at me sort of expectantly, like he suspected any minute I would start lisping and swishing. He was really afflicted with what I call The Straight Boy Blues. He was intimidated by a gay man who looked him "straight" in the eye, and didn't dress like Judy Garland. "I've got something for ya," she smiled up at me, from her five-foot-four-inch little body. Her hazel eyes had that wicked look of hers that me.ans I'm really in deep shit. Last time she gave me That Look, she hung a poster of a full-length nude male on the outside of my dorm room door, for everyone's viewing pleasure; and this ain't exactly a co-ed wing. The next day she hung up a poster of Heather Locklear in its place. My poor roommate just stays confused. She pulled a white square of cloth from her bookbag, and smiling that ever-so- disarming grin of hers, handed it over. I faked a smile back at her, already scheming for a way to get her, if it's what I think it is. I unfolded the cloth. It was just what I most feared. A size large white cotton t-shirt with a big, bright red capital "G" on the chest; one that would've made Hester Prine blush. I tried to scowl at her, but we both ended up laughing. Randy kind of chuckled, still having trouble being cool around me. I had asked for it. Jocelyn's last birthday, I gave her a similar t-shirt, (only hers had a scarlet "A" on it), while her Baptist grandmother was watching. Grandma Barefoot was not pleased, but Jos wore it to school anyway. But I had a real chore talking her out of wearing the damn thing to the Prom. She's completely incorrigible. Of course I wore the shirt right then. What's risking my life by coming out to a whole dorm-full of people that I barely know, compared to my wonderful friendship with Jossi-bitch Barefoot? -Don Suggs BY SURGEON GENERAL' to the commercials, professing that their viewers would find them unacceptable because the ads could be perceived as an endorsement of contraception or sexual permissiveness. Rep. Henry A. Waxman, D-Calif., accused the networks of being hypocritical. "While portraying thousands of sexual encounters each year in programming and while market ing thousands of products using sex appeal, television is unwilling to give the life saving information about safe sex and condoms," he said. I ,i iif;: ! i
Lambda (Carolina Gay and Lesbian Association, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill)
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