^1. itiW^'r*. *♦»»*■ •■•^r •f«*;nf;*f p>*.*.r •*1.*;«>^* ^r***-«» ,4*i*;* •*»* «•.*«»• ot€s From th ; ‘ I Thanks for your input about my problem last issue. Most people agreed that, if I don't want to resume a friendship with my ex-lover, I shouldn't. I think I've rid myself of that problem now-- I've just let it go. Now my life is going quite well and--even better--I'm in love. I must confess that I'd worried a bit about exposing my private life to y'all, but no one seemed to mind. My next question is about coming out in the job world. Now, if you're gay, lesbian or bisexual and you feel uncomfortable in your job when everyone assumes you're heterosexual, what do you do? I came out on my job application, but everyone knows about me anyway. Certainly one's sexual orientation should not be an issue in your workplace, but let's face reality. If you have a desk and you want your sweetie's face on it, or if you and your coworkers talk about your families during breaks, then your sexuality becomes an issue. It seems that there are several ways to handle the situation: a) Avoidance: "My homelife? Gosh, break's over already. Busy, busy, busy. Well, I'd better get back to work. Bye!” b) Exclusion: "Yes, I talk with my mother and my friends. A significant other really isn't part of my definition of home life. But I love my dog. A lot." c) Gender change: "Oh yes, I have a wonderful lover. She--um--he is very considerate and lots of fun. In fact, we went out to The Power Company--um, WFUN--last night and she--um, he paid." d) Frankness: "Well, I live at home with my lover (insert lover's name). We live in an apartment now, but maybe we'll get a house some day. Pretty yuppie, huh?" Of course there are consequences to any of these responses. You can be interpreted as either a workaholic, aloof, ineloquent, or blatantly gay/lesbian. I have, at one time or another, used all of these techniques. I prefer the position I'm in now-- everyone knows and any problem is theirs. I realize I'm in a different job situation than others, though--! work for liberal employers in a city with a nondiscrimination clause. Write Lambda c/o CGLA if you think of other techniques or have thoughts on mine. --Liz Stiles Most people know of the services the CGLA provides for the University: publishing Lambda. performing outreaches, providing AIDS information, and giving support to students dealing with their own homosexuality. However, we are not utilizing the most significant contribution we are capable of performing. The CGLA can be a nucleus for a lesbian and gay community on campus. A community that would reduce 22,000 students as well as faculty and staff to a small group of men and women with common experiences, problems, and dreams. A few dedicated individuals are performing many CGLA duties, but we are not fulfilling our potential as a base for a lesbian and gay community on campus. This is partially our fault. The CGLA is not primarily a "fun" organization--we don't have time to provide too much more than the services we now perform. Much of the problem lies beyond our control. Many people are not prepared to be out, but this note is not directed at those individuals. Instead, it is directed at the students, faculty, and staff who are out without being involved in the CGLA. You many not be able to contribute much time, but we would love for you to attend some of our functions. We hold monthly meetings, biweekly Lesbian Lunches, dances, and Awareness Week. Your input is needed and desired. You are a source of new ideas, support, and experience. UNC's anti-discrimination clause does not prohibit discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. We would like to remedy this by the end of next year. But our power would be greatly increased with the support of faculty and staff. The CGLA exists for the entire university. Please help build a family, a community at UNC. We would like to meet you. ~-Patrick Lamerson books • cards • magazines A Ninth Street tradition for eleven years. [iliThe ' j 1 6 _ ^ T jc EUi L .3 A : 1 eT , O OR iimBPiPW 720 Ninth Street • Durhanf>. NC 27705 • 919/286-2700 Monday-Wednesday 9-6 • Thursday-Saturday 9-8 • Sunday 9-5