Newspapers / Gardner-Webb University Student Newspaper / Feb. 6, 1992, edition 1 / Page 3
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vim ^ By Noel T. Manning, II Entertainment Editor To Pun or Not to Pun The following list provides the GWC community with 15 of the worst puns to sur vive history...(WARNING: THE FOL LOWING LIST IS QUITE STUPID AND MAY BE CONSIDERED UNSUITABLE FOR SOME READERS.) 1. The eskimo stabbed himself with an icicle. He died of cold cuts. 2. In his dessert list, a San Antonio res- tauranteur suggests, "Remember the a la mode." 3. The commuters Volkswagen broke down once too often, so he consigned it to an old Volks home. 4. The wise old crow perched himself on a telephone wire. He wanted to make a long-distance caw. 5. A talkative musician couldn’t hold a job. Every time he opened his mouth he put his flute in it. 6. A farmer with relatives in Germany heard that a food package he had sent had never arrived. Optimistically, he reassured them, "Cheer up! The Wurst is yet to come." 7. When the promoter of a big flower show was told that a postponement was necessary because the exhibits could not be installed on time, he explained to his back ers, "We were simply caught with our plants down." 8. There was an unscheduled event in a Baghdad harem. The sultan barged in unex pectedly, and his 62 wives let out a terrified sheikh. 9. A critic declared that he always praised the first show of a new theatrical season. "Who am I," he asked, "to stone the first cast." 10. Egotist: a man who’s always me-deep in conversation. 11. A hen stopped in the middle of the highway. She wanted to lay it on the line. 12. The husband of a talkative wife sighed, "I’ve given her the best ears of my life." 13. "It’s raining cats and dogs," one man remarked. "I know," said another. "I just stepped into a poodle." 14. An eccentric bachelor passed away and left a nephew nothing but 392 clocks. The nephew is now busy winding up the estate. 15. The baseball pitcher with a sore arm was in the throws of agony. **Sources: Bennett Cerfs "Laugh Day, A Treasury of Atrocious Puns," and Richard Armor’s "Puns for Fun."** SEAvents: January in Review By Aimee Stewart SEA Chair Super Bowl XXVI Party The Residence Hall Association (RHA) and Student Entertainment Association (SEA) combined their talents and put on a Super Bowl Party on January 26. Both groups worked together in coordinating the event. Door prizes were given to students who came closest when guessing the final score of the game. 1st Annual GWC Video Music Awards a Success! The 1st Annual GWC Video Music Awards were presented on Tuesday, January 28. The awards were a result of a student activity, Fun Flicks, held on Jan. 13. There students were able to find their snaz ziest costumes, show off their awesome talent and make a music video. The event sponsored by SEA brought out over 200 students who stopped in to watch or even to make a video. The result was 45 of the hottest music videos around. Students were then asked to submit their videos to Audrey Sloan’s office where the videos were categorized by their form and content. The videos were them brought to a selection panel who decided on the best videos. The music awards show was held in the cafeteria and was visited by such hot acts as "Nirvana" and "Digital Underground." Presenters included Cher, Madonna, Doogie Howser, M.D., and Student Ac tivities Director Sloan. Wirmers included: Demond Wesley, Shackin’ Up, Darlene Hasty, Mik Ayalia, Nirvana, Digital Underground, Hotel California, and a Video Vanguard Award was presented to Jack Thomas and Stuart Herbert for their sparking videos that were submitted. Sloan also received an award for the contributions to SEA. The 2nd Annual GWC Video Music Awards are already in the works for the Fall of 1992. GWC Students Form Band Four multi-talented students have banded (sorry about the pun!) together to February SEAvents Thursday, Feb. 6 The funkapella, jazzapella sounds of Regency at 8 p.m. in the OMG Ballroom. This program is being presented in con junction with Black History Month. Friday, Feb. 7 Movie "Glory" at 9 p.m. in the Banquet Hall Monday, Feb. 10 Comedianne Bertice Berry at 9 p.m. in the Banquet Hall. This program is being presented in conjunction with Black His tory Month. Thursday, Feb. 13 Valentine’s Dance in the Banquet Hall from 9 p.m. to 1 a.m. S&L Sounds will provide the music. Friday, Feb. 14 Movie 'Time After Time" at 9 p.m. in the Banquet Hall. Friday, Feb. 21 Movie "Gone With the Wind" Time TBA in the Banquet Hall Saturday, Feb. 22 "Cornbread Gumby" concert in conjunc tion with VIP Day. Time and place, TBA Tuesday, Feb. 25 Shirley Chissom, speaker at Dimensions, sponsored by SEA. form a hot new band called, "Cornbread Gumby." The band is composed of Andy White, Charles Neil, John Rice and Marty White. Having been in existence for only a short time, the band has shown their talents al ready at a SEA concert event held Jan. 31 in the DCC Banquet Hall. "Cornbread Gumby" performs songs filled with original lyrics and music written by Andy White. Cover songs include num bers originally performed by U2, Black Crows, and REM. "Cornbread Gumby" will play again on Feb. 22 in conjunction with VIP Day. We^PJZZTI ComicTJo^ BUFFET SUNDAY 115 East Dixon Blvd., Shelby THRU NOW AVAILABLE - SUB SANDWICHES! y RSDAY 11 to 2PM 5to\pM ♦Does Not Include Buffet*
Gardner-Webb University Student Newspaper
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Feb. 6, 1992, edition 1
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