PAGE TWO
THE LANCE
THURSDAY
THE UNCE
St. Andrews Presbyterian College
Laurinburg, N. C. 28352
StaH
Sara Lee
Charlie Pratt
Wayne Warren
..... Louis Swanson
Mark Kleber
Lonnie Burrell
Editor -
Associate Editor
Associate Editor
Assistant Editor _... —
Sports Editor
Business Manager
Assistant Business Manager Mike Reynolds
Advisor - Mr. Fowler Dugger
This staff is committed to the guidelines set up for
campus media as recorded in the Code of Responsibility
calling for "Recognition on the part of authors, editors
and commentators that freedom entails corollary respon
sibilities to be governed by the canons of responsible
journalism, such as avoidance of libel, slander, impro
priety, undocumented allegations, attacks on personal
integrity, and the technique of harrassment and innu
endo.” The opinions expressed by individual authors are
not necessarily those of the College or the staff of the
Lance. Letters to the editor and articles are welcome,
subject to space limitations.
Subscription Rates $3.00 per semester
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^Y^NOV. 12,19,,
Letters To The Editor:
To the Editor of the Lance:
On behalf of the Scotland
County Democratic Executive
Committee, I would like to thank
the many people at St. Andrews
who worked for Democrats dur
ing the recent election cam
paign. This help was one signi
ficant factor In enabling all
Democratic candidates to win In
Scotland County.
Yours sincerely,
Bill Winn, chairman Scotland
County Democrats
This letter, we think, says
something meaningful about the
current situation of this cam
pus and the reactions of many
people to It. We decided to print
It, despite the fact that It is
written under an obvious pseu
donym . . . Phil I. Stine? Come
on!
An Open Letter to The Lance
Of late, the Lance has been
the object of lofty sneers. While
ComputerConfoundsAAyth AndAAachine
To Co-opt Election - Bushoven Prevails
In these times of radical
change at St. Andrews, there is
a long overdue need for an In
stitutional structure which
would maintain the traditions
and customs so necessary for
the very preservation of the
Institution. What Is needed is a
new position at St. Andrews; one
that would uphold the pomp and
circumstance of years gone by,
one that would be responsible
for holding down the fort so to
speak from the hurricane of
change. In short, St. Andrews
needs a Dean of Protocol.
It was decided that only a
very special kind of person
could man this post. There could
be three philosophical approa
ches to such a Job. The first Is
that the function Is primarily a
mechanical process of organi
zation that Includes arranging
formal social functions with
regalia and finesse. This func
tion Is finally program mable, so
therefore the Election Com
mittee nominated “Annabelle”,
the computer terminal, feeling
that she was aptly suited for
such a position.
The second philosophical ap
proach Is that only a god who
has had experience in matters
of arrangement through com
promise and assimilation could
perform adequately. In fact, the
job requires a supei human ef
fort, one that demands mytho
logical foundation supporting it
and him. The obvious choice for
the second nominee would be
Baal, the Caananlte god. If he
could assimilate wiai Chris
tians, he certainly ought to han
dle any S,A. Undlng.
The third philosophical as
sumption Is that protocol de
mands a personal touch that
cannot be offered with machine
or myth. A personal touch
necessitates a person, right,
who sincerely believes in the
appropriateness of past cere
mony and flair. What Is needed
Is a man of the world, a man of
property—without a doubt, the
only candidate on this campus
with such qualifications Is
“Dr.” Cornelius Bushoven.
The daybroke cold and grey-
perfect for a democratic vic
tory, but “Dr.” Bushoven at
tracted quite an energetic and
dedicated following. Although he
denied running for any office
his “Friends” proceeded to
campaign heavily in order to
see their man win. They be
lieved that exposure and pub
licity would be sufficient to
elect their nominee.
The Nominating Committee
set up the polling booth In the
LA building, but “unintentio
nally” disguised the ballot l)ox
so that no one really knew how
or where to vote. Actually, ac
cording to democratic proce
dure, the election had nothing
to do with it. Annabelle In her
Infinite wisdom decided the fi
nal winner, lx)th throu^ her
withdrawal and her tabulation.
Working In conjunction with
the Nominating Committee, the
Friends of Bushoven League
(so much for partisan politics—
who programmed the com
puter—hmm?) painted a rather
Intricate and self-explanatory
wall,
ELECT NEAL BUSHOVEN
which began the festivities. Yes,
Neal did have a modest plat
form for what ought to be. His
main vote getters were his
beard requirement and his man
datory Sunday night black tie
formal affair. Along with a
heavy poster campaign, “Vote
for Bushoven” signs were pla
ced In the mall—actually they
were strewn around the floor
for the appropriate effect--and
Neal received, among other
paraphernalia, a formal Invita
tion to his victory party, a
“Pro-Neal” campaign button,
a copy of his own platform . . .
The “Friends” held on punches
as their all out campaign moved
to the finale of the day In an
nouncing the victor. WlthWSAP
spots Identifying Neal Bushoven
with “Pomp and Circumstance”
and a moving rendition of “God
BLESS Bushoven”, how could
he lose?
With 81% of the votes tabu
lated by dinner, Neal Bushoven
was projected to win by an over
whelming margin. His victory
was taken modestly and
humbly—how else from a man
with the statute of a, yes, Neal
Bushoven. May he serve us well.
IN BRIEF:
CAIRN appears twice yearly,
In the winter and spring, and
publishes poetry, fiction non
fiction and art. Manuscripts
should l)e submitted to CAIRN,
Box 78, St. Andrews. Manu
scripts should be typed and
accompanied by a self-addres
sed envelope. The deadline for
submissions to volume VI of
CAIRN Is November 21.
Approxima;ely twenty-five
applications have been received
from people interested in paint
ing the house for foster chil
dren. The project, sponsored by
the Peace Corps, wUl be carried
out Saturday.
A statewide women’s libera
tion conference will be held
In Durham on Saturday, Novem
ber 21, sponsored by the Dur
ham Women’s Liberation Col
lective. Information on the con
ference Is avaUable from Sara
Lee.
Mr. Bob Warren from the
Balfour Company will be on
campus December 2 from 9:00
a.m. to 4:00 p.m. to take or
ders for 1971 and 1972 class
rings. A ten dollar deposit will
be required at that Ume.
Neal Bushoven’s parents are
here to help him celebrate his
overwhelming victory In yes
terday’s election. Welcome, and
you have a fine son I
Recruiting on campus next
week will be the Chatham Coun
ty Schools on Tuesday, Novem
ber 17 and the NAVY on Wed
nesday November 18. You are
reminded to sign up In advance
with Chris Hannas In the Place
ment Office.
Congratulations to Neal
Bushoven, who has just finished
the first draft of his disserta
tion.
Members of the Women’s
group on campus, in conjunc
tion with the college counseling
services, will be selling “Ele
phants and Butterflies”, abirth
control and abortion Informa
tion handbook that is interesting
reading as well. Cost Is only a
quarter and the booklet will go
on sale beginning Monday in
dormitories. If you have not
been contacted by the middle of
next week, and you would like a
copy of “Elephants and Butter
flies”, please get In touch with
one of the following: Beth Cope
land, Karen Seawell, Joanne
Foil, Jean Carr, Lucy Wilson,
Janice MarUn, Margaret Ross,
Linda Leslie, Sara Lee, Paula
Nance, Judy Edwards, or Sue
Owen.
the derision cast upon the Lance
has been diverse, the salvation
of the paper can be easily as
sured: the Lance must Include
humor In its presentation, as
well as it must exclude certain
things.
The Lance must—If It is to
survive with any degree of res
pectability—exclude, for in
stance, the arthritic political
circuit of Mr. Eric Gregory;
It must also exclude the tauto
logical drivel of those who reply
to Mr. Gregory.
Humor Instead ml^t be pro
fitably Inserted—humor, be It
asserted, not wit, for wit Is a
word the significance of which
has long since perished. The
Lance ml^t publish, for In
stance, excerpted quips from
the s^endld rhetoric of Dr.
Melton, whose C&C lectures
enliven the otherwise insubstan
tial lives of sophomores.
Another 1 n t e r e sting topic
would be a treatise on the ed
ucational progress being made
by the STMS program. STMS Is
realizing profound advances In
learning through its valuable
pedagogical practice of mish
mash, or, to use Milton’s bold
terminology, chaos.
Still another topic might be
a critical examination of the
furthering of etiquette so well
engendered In the St. Andrews
cafeteria. One ml^t, for in
stance, discuss how one should
handle one’s sloppy-joe without
allowing grease to collect on
one’s fingers, palms, wrists,
forearms, and elbows.
Humor, I reassert, shall
cleanse the tarnish from the
Lance.' As for myself, I should
gladly submit humor for pub
lication if only there were any
humor on this campus. And,
moreover, being a paltry mem
ber of bourgeois society, I am
singularly Incapable of recog
nizing humor.
Respectfully,
Phil I, Stine
To the Editor,
I admittedly am out of your
localized situation, but I read
virlth Interest the article »
the picketing of the Army T
crulter and the editorial i»
J^ur Oct. 29 issue. 1 wo^
like to express two concenis
which I feel deeply m regard
to the situation.
The first is that I hope the
actions taken against He re-
crulter are not Interpreted as
personal attacks against Mr
Roberson the recruiter. Mr
Roberson Is not personally re^
sponsible for the mUltarlsUc
ethos In this country, nor its
logical manifestations, con
scription and a standing army,
He, just as all recruiters^
though, helps perpetuate Uns
system, and as such beconies
a target for meaningful protest
and demonstration. The actions
taken against his presence on
campus I hope are viewed as
a protest against his position
and the establishment that em
ploys and maintains that posl.
tlon.
My second concern Is that
those Involved In this not de
fend themselves or their ac
tions as being a part of any
kind of academically free tra
dition. “And each to his own
thing as long as it hurts no
one, and we’re doing our thlng"-
type of argument. Unless those
Involved can state they are
about resistance, and that this
may at some time prevent
someone from doing his own
thing, I think the political rea
lity of their action becomes
questionable. 'Hie army re
cruiter does his Job’s ownthlng
by recruiting people to become
professional, or at least well
trained, mercenaries that sup
port an illegal, immoral, in
sane war of aggression against
peasant people. I hope those
concerned about this entire
question of campus recruit
ment realize that letting that
particular own thing continue
Is not permitting somethlngthat
hurts no one continue.
Let us realize and admit we
are who we say we are.
Peace and Power,
David Harvln
Dayton, Ohio
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